I sat down in a bench where I can see the people around me clearly. watching them doing whatever they want and realizing how happy they are, unlike me. It's been 3 days of stay here in Rome together with my best friend Kim and with our husbands and their best buds, Taemin and Kevin but add another 4 ladies, namely: Yoona, Dara, Hara and Jessica. these four ladies are in good terms with the boys since they were still a child. 

    at first, I didn't expect that we will really have 6 other accompaniment until we arrive in the airport and told me about it. aish, I can't do anything but to welcome them. Kim and I were not that communicating well this past days due to her hubby Yoseob who keeps on dragging her wherever he goes. Of course I can't do anything, they are a real couple now, I guess. 

     With me? well, I've been a loner. it's suppose to be "my trip" but seems like it's been "their trip". seeing people who are happy makes me more lonely. I envy them for being such. I can't even find my happiness. the worst thing here is that, it's my birthday!

no one seems to care about this special birthday of mine. I have to celebrate it alone and be happy alone but seems like I'd be insane with that. 

honestly, I am hoping that everyone is thinking for a "surprise" party for me that's why I'm a bit happy then yay! I still tried to hop with the others' activities, going to malls and different tourist spots in Rome. boating alone, taking pictures alone, eating alone and celebrating alone. it's 6:00pm already but no one dared to greet me a "happy birthday". I texted Kim and asked her where are they and she replied "Eternal City. sorry that I didn't tell you" 

it's about 2 hours trip from our hotel. knowing their "secret-trip" I know that they'd probably go back tomorrow morning. Instead of mourning, I bought a cake and some foods to celebrate my birthday ALONE. I went back to the hotel and prepared everything.

it's 9:00pm when I finished preparing. the cake is on the table with the candles on and with my favorite foods. I can't stop thinking and expecting that they will really surprise me so I waited. waited for nothing. I looked at my watch and it's 11:58pm. my birthday is almost over so instead of waiting for nothing, I stopped hoping and put on my party hat, lighted my candle again and sang myself a happy birthday. it's painful. my tears are about to flow down while singing my happy birthday, wishing to myself and eating my own-effort-food. Kim forgot my birthday, Donghae forgot about it and also my parents and other family ties. well, I don't have that much friends so, whom will I expect more to greet me?

My birthday is done. I woke up with no signs of Kim arriving to our room. I checked my phone to see if they texted me but no one did. I feel weak and useless. I tried to suppress my feelings about what happened yesterday. upon opening the door of my room, I saw a poster. a poster that says where should I go next. I was amused to the place so I decided to go there. 

---

"aish, it's so tiring. April are you here?" Kim called as she enter the room. she opened the refrigerator and saw a cake, almost half in size,

"she must be hungry..." Kim uttered.

she lied down in the bed and took a nap. 

---

"Donghae!" Kevin called out loud.

"what?" 

"have you seen your wife?"

"not yet.."

"of course you won't. it's like since we've stepped in this place, you two did not talk to each other" Taemin said.

"then? what do you want me to do? find her and talk to her?" Donghae harshly replied.

"you are mean! she's still your wife! I'd better go with MY WIFE and check her out!" Yoseob said stressing how he takes good care of his wife. 

Yoseob went to Kim's room. she's still asleep but woke up when she heard the door open. she thought it's April. 

"hey, why are you here?" Kim asked.

"to ask you out.."

"what's the occasion?" Kim asked another one.

"none??" Yoseob replied and added "I just want..." but was cut out

"CELEBRATION???????? oh my gosh! damn it!" Kim shouted and run towards the refrigerator and took out the cake that is left in the refrigerator. 

"what? why?" Yoseob asked her worriedly.

instead of answering, Kim run towards the room next to them with the cake and saw the four ladies with the three boys happily chatting around.

"hey, what's the matter?" Yoseob asked again chasing her. everyone eyes on her. 

"Kim, what's wrong?" Taemin asked concernly.

"thanks for the cake! better eat it now" Kevin said and grabbed the cake from Kim. 

"mocha flavor, yummy!" said Kevin and is about to eat a piece when Kim said "it's April's birthday yesterday!"

a second of silence filled the room and abruptly, in unison, everyone said "WHAT??"

"yes, it's her birthday yesterday and seems like she celebrated alone. I saw that cake in the refrigerator earlier. I'm such a bad friend am I? forgetting her birthday."

"it's not your fault that you forget it" Yoseob tried to lighten her.

"NO! it's my fault. I have to find her now" Kim said went out to search for her friend.

Meanwhile, the boys were doubting if they will go and help Kim or not. Yoseob followed his wife followed by Taemin and the three girls. Donghae, Kevin and Jessica stayed in the room.