July 2005

I can’t answer. I don’t want to tell her that I like her now. No, it’s not the right time.

“Is it someone I know?” she asked, as she got closer to me. I gulped as I pushed up my black round frame eyeglass and moved far from her. “Is it… me?”

She was staring and smirking at me. Her face was just a few inches from mine. I looked at another direction. My palms were sweating as I held my bed’s blue blanket tightly. She burst in laughter and moved away from me. “Oh, Minho. You’re funny!”

I looked at her and laughed awkwardly.

“It’s impossible to be me, right?” she said and continued laughing.

“Of course! Why would it be you?” I denied. Why would it be her? Scratch that. Why wouldn’t it be her?

“Exactly, chingu!” she said.

I snatched the black notebook from her hands and put it in the small drawer under the small white wooden lamp table beside my bed. She sat at the black leather desk chair and faced the PC. My body froze as I stared at her back.

“If it’s not me, then who?” she asked me as her hands are on the keyboard, typing.

I paused for a while and thought of a girl. A bunch of faces flashed in my mind. Sulli, Sulli, Sulli, Sulli. They’re all the same! Seconds after, a different face appeared, and without thinking, I said, “Krystal.”

She twisted the desk chair 180-degrees and faced me with her jaws dropped and eyebrows raised. I was shocked on what I said, too. “Really?”

“Yes. Your best friend, Krystal, I like her,” I said flatly.

She grabbed her phone, flipped it as the small screen illuminated and said, “I thought she’s the only one who likes you. I’ll text her. I’m sure she’ll like it!”

I got off from my bed and quickly snatched the phone from her. “D-d-don’t tell her.”

“Why?” she said and chuckled.

Think of an excuse. Quick! “Because I want to confess to her after I write the song.” Good, I thought. I looked at her phone and her text was still not sent. The message seemed incomplete. I removed the message, closed the phone and gave it to her.

She tut and said, “Arasseo. I’ll zip this mouth of mine. Make sure to be sweet as a candy cane, okay?”

I nodded and sighed afterwards when she twisted the chair to face the computer. I lied on my bed and stared at the ceiling as the ceiling fan rotates. What did you just say? You like Krystal? Pabo! I hit my head continuously.

My thoughts were disturbed when I heard the front door squeaked. “Minho, it’s your umma!” she said as she nudged my knee. I got up from the bed and opened my room’s door.

Me and Sulli went out and said in chorus, “Happy birthday!” Umma was surprised and we both hugged her tightly. Sulli sang her a song with her cute voice.

“Thank you!” she replied as she released her hug and placed the yellow plastic bags beside the sink. “Have you eaten, Sulli?”

“Aniyo,” Sulli replied.

“Come eat with us for dinner. Invite your umma and appa, too!” she said enthusiastically.

“Sure, Mrs. Choi! I’ll be back by 6PM with my parents,” Sulli said as she waved her hands and walked out of the house.

“Ah, that girl,” umma said as she brought the vegetables out from the plastic bag. “How I wish I could have a daughter like her.” She chuckled in a high pitch.

“You don’t like me as your son, umma?” I pouted.

She faced me and flatly said, “No.” She grinned afterwards as her wrinkles near her eyes appeared. “Just kidding. Of course I like you as my son! Who wouldn’t like a son who is a top notch student in their school?”

I smiled and walked towards her to hug her on the side. She smiled and patted me on the shoulder. “Aigoo. You’re too tall already!” she remarked.

I laughed as I released the hug and asked, “Where’s appa?”

“He’s going home after an hour. He needs to work extra time at the Gwangalli Beach. It’s summer season, and as you know, Busan’s the summer capital of Korea. So, they expect a lot of tourists,” she said. She grabbed the knife and the cutting tray, and placed it near the sink. “Go to your room first. I’ll just cook our dinner.” She looked at me and smiled. I smiled back and walked to my room.

I closed the door and thought of something. I went to my desk and grabbed my red wallet with Velcro closure. I opened it and grabbed some of my savings. I opened the door walked out of the house secretly.

I quickly ran to the nearest bakery. I pushed the glass door as the chimes made a sound.

“Ahnyeong,” the employee said. I went inside the vanilla-scented and warmly lit bakery. It was spacious and had a youthful vibe in it.

I walked towards the bakery display case and bent down to take a closer look at the cakes displayed. They all looked delicious, but the one that caught my attention was the simple frosted cake with six strawberries on top. I looked at the cashier and pointed my index finger on the cake.

“Can you put a ‘Happy birthday, umma’ text at the center of the cake?” I requested.

“Sure thing, Sir. Wait a moment,” he said as he grabbed the cake.

After a minute, the cashier said, “Here you go, Sir. 30,000 Won.” I held the big bubblegum pink box and gave him the money. “Thank you, Sir.”

I left the bakery and ran home. When I entered the house, I saw umma at the kitchen, busy preparing dinner. I slowly went towards my room, trying not to make any sound.

I checked the time and it’s already 6PM. “Minho! Dinner’s ready,” umma said. I unpacked the pink box, held the cake and went out of my room. I saw umma preparing the wooden dinner table. When she faced me, she was surprised that I was holding a cake.

“H-h-how?” she asked me. The shock in her face was still evident.

“Happy birthday, again, umma. I saved up money for this,” I said and smiled. I walked towards her and placed the cake at the center of the table.

Her eyes watered as she embraced me warmly. “Gomawo, Minho!” I felt tears on my grey shirt.

“Don’t cry, umma! It’s your birthday!” I said. She chuckled as she wiped her tears with her arms.

The door opened, and we saw appa, along with Sulli and her family. Umma ran towards appa, and appa pecked her on the lips as he hugged her. Afterwards, we all went to the dining table and had a meaningful dinner, celebrating my umma’s birthday.

“Saengil chukha hamnida. Saengil chukha hamnida,” Sulli sang as the candles were lit on the cake. After Sulli sang, umma blowed the candles and we all clapped.

I the TV and it was tuned on Mnet. Suddenly, Sulli shrieked and we all looked at her. Her eyes were stuck on the TV. We watched it and the emcee said that they’d show BoA’s comeback teaser. The teaser video started and Sulli was grinning.

Based on the photos shown, it seemed like BoA’s going from a y image to a boyish one. The sound had more impact and the lyrics “Yes baby, oh! Yes baby, oh! Yes baby, oh!” were sung with power. The last frame was a photo of BoA in a white lace blouse, wearing her new hairstyle, with the text “BoA – Girls On Top” in a condensed serif font beside her.

“Wow,” Sulli said. “I’m going to die.” She faked a faint and we all laughed.

“Aigoo, Sulli,” I said.

“Speaking of K-Pop, I have good news,” Sulli’s umma said and paused for a while as she swallowed her food. “Sulli’s going to audition for SM Entertainment next week.”

“Really?” appa said enthusiastically.

I was shocked. I was happy for her, but the feeling of losing someone became more dominant in my heart.