Dense (adj.)

-        We are not connected by lose threads; instead we are tangled into a strange and complicated weave of alliances.

I was plucked by Jinki away from Choi Minho and “attractive guy’s” frolicking. Suddenly, the hallways seemed congested and I wanted nothing else but to escape it.

“Taemin!” a voice yells. There aren’t enough Taemins in the universe, especially this university, so I assumed it was me that voice was calling for. I reluctantly turned my head around only to see Choi Minho and attractive guy walking towards us.

I already figured out what he wanted from me. Obviously, it is to introduce attractive guy to us as his boyfriend. I was barfing on the inside but I had to plaster a smile on my face. After all, I had no reason – absolutely no reason – to feel anything nasty towards them.

“I didn’t see you at class.” I told him.

Choi Minho smiled and replied, “Yeah. I was late and hung over, so I decided to skip it.”

I nodded, feigning interest. “Oh. So yeah, we’re going to eat lunch. See you tomorrow I guess,” I said as I started to move away.

I looked back again and saw confusion painted on Choi Minho’s face.

After our encounter Jinki and I decided to eat at a local diner instead our usual spot. We ordered and sat on a secluded booth and just as we were about to eat I heard Kai’s voice.

I stood up from where I was sitting and true to my initial hypothesis it was indeed Kai that I heard. Only it wasn’t just him. He was on the other side of the diner and he was with another girl. I sat down again and started to snicker.

“Was that Kai?” Jinki asked.

“Yes,” I replied. Jinki started to stand up with the intent of going to where Kai was but I grabbed his arm and forced him to sit down.

“Oi, what was that for?”

“Don’t go there. He’s on a date.”

“Omo. Only a few weeks here and he’s already dating?” Jinki asked with amusement and reverence. I laughed again. “Wait, isn’t he too young to date?” he asked me.

I contemplated on his question for a while and realized that no, he wasn’t too young to date. At the very least, I’d rather him have fun. I didn’t know why or how it happened, but I noticed myself wanting Kai to feel as happy as he can, and if that meant dating, then so be it.

“Nah. I don’t think so. Let him have his fun,” I answered Jinki. “Let’s just eat our lunch quietly and quickly. I still have some labwork to do.”

***

People’s emotions are like density. Mathematically, density is expressed as mass divided by volume.  Simply speaking, an increase in pressure means an increase in density. Our emotions tend to behave the same way. The more we are exposed to pressure from the outside, the more we are pushed to harden on the inside. Some call it defence mechanism; I call it the law of the universe. Because really, when it comes down to it, who wouldn’t want to harden if it meant saving yourself from catastrophe?

I went to class the following day with conviction. I’ll stay away from Choi Minho. I purposely went to class later than usual, with just enough time before the class started. It was a brilliant plan. With barely enough time before class began, there will be not chance for frippery.

I sat down on my seat beside him. He tried to get my attention but I easily deflected him by talking to Jinki instead. Just when he was about t