Chapter 10: Of Love Song & Sad Song   Chapter 10 Theme Song 1: The Day We First Met by Urban Zakapa * For lyrics translation: http://youtu.be/uIWmaZaThGQ   Chapter 10 Theme Song 2: I Hate You by Urban Zakapa **   ♥♥♥     "Ommo, my voice cracked again." I tried to laugh it off. "I'm sorry, Minjun oppa, I'll try better." Aish, I hate it. Why do I keep messing up?   "No...no. It's okay. Just calm down, don't be too nervous, okay?" He patted my arm and encouraged me to try again, and to relax, with soft words and comforting voice. It still felt surreal, that somebody would actually treat me this good, like a woman, instead of a noona. Could it be because he's older and more experienced? Or could it be he's just courteous and he actually treated the other girls better than this?   It's the first time I chose someone other than Jaebum, and honestly, I'm extremely nervous right now. I don't think I could do anything right. To change decision after so long, is like changing heart, moving on. You don't change heart easily, but it's even harder to move on and go into a new path you never even considered of taking. Before this, the only reason I paired with Mir, was because of PD-nim's plans to attract more viewership, and the one with Hyungsik, was just because of a twisted fate. There was a time I even had no date because nobody would choose me. But this, is the first decision I made on my own to move forward from being stuck in a rut for so long.   Why Minjun oppa? Maybe because what Hyungsikkie said last night really weighed on my mind. And after all I've went through, I feel like only Minjun oppa will be able to take care of me instead of expecting me to take care of him like the younger guys would do. I knew he would not choose me, so when I had this golden opportunity, I should not let it be wasted. I've had enough hurt. Just look at Hyejeong. She had bad time too, at first. But after she started pairing up with Minjun oppa, she became happier. I've seen how he treated everyone. I'm curious if he would treat me just as good. I want to try seek for happiness, no matter how short lived it would be.   I never thought I would feel so burdened like this because he is treating me so good. I feel like I could not handle this. But why? What's wrong with me? Have I gotten so used to being treated like worthless dirt that guys only try to wipe off their shirts? I could not even face him naturally because I was too overwhelmed. I've been waiting for this moment, and why do I have to feel this way?   "Here, Seungah-ya, you look dehydrated. Drink this. I'm worried you might pass out." I took the mineral water bottle from his hand but could only stare at it. I didn't know for how long, before looking back at him with a smile, and muttered "Thanks oppa."   Then, he took out a handkerchief and wiped my hairline with it, gently. "It's a really hot day today, unexpectedly." He looked up at the sky, sheltering his eyes with one hand, after fixing strands of hair that fell across my face, back to their place. Normally, I don't feel comfortable to get too close in such a short period. I mean, I don't mind getting close, but I don't need a man to fix my hair for me out of the blue. I can do that on my own. Such gesture only made me more self conscious. But remembering Hyungsik's advice, if this is a way Minjun oppa will feel like he's taking care of me, then I'll put up with it. I need at least to win someone at the end, and even if it's impossible for Minjun oppa to choose me, I still have to try.   "It might rain though." I murmured.   "Yeah, it might."   "Oppa, shall we continue our practice now?"   "If you are ready. Are you sure you're alright?"   I nodded with a smile, trying to assure him. Shouldn't I be the one to ask him that question? Nevertheless, we sang together the song Minjun oppa had chosen. He was really nice, the atmosphere felt good, the song is romantic, but something felt amiss.   We were both in denial. We were singing with our lungs and voices, but not from within the heart. I knew Minjun oppa could feel it too. There's no way a great singer like him couldn't feel it, if even I could. We are singing a song about first meeting*. But I guess, our minds aren't connected to the song. We're singing it like technically good singers would, but not the way singers who feel the song would. I wonder if his mind is still occupied by Jei. Of course, he would still think of her. It's just been less than 24 hours since our previous date. Especially with something that happened between them.   "Oppa, I know I shouldn't bring this up, but...are you bothered about something? Do you...want to talk about it?" Asking the question is like asking for doom on myself. The trauma of having your partner talking about his dream girl all the time when he's with you,