Your POV

I yelled at Kristy for saying that and I end it all by saying, “I wish that I had Yongguk after I kicked him out. I needed him too talk too even if he was overbearing once he’d find out about what happened. I wish I had him all this time.”

Kristy looks at me and says something that I’m purely shocked about, “Jin Kyoung tell him about what happened. Tell him and see what I mean he deserves to know anyways that he almost had a child.”

I look at her and then I pull out a small box from under my bed, “If I tell him you will talk with your husband.about everything. You two will sit down and talk.”

She looks at me, “Why do I need too talk too Yamin?”

“1 he’s your husband and 2 you know you’re not really mad at him, but more yourself. You keep questioning if he really loves you if you had lost your baby. You keep asking yourself if you really deserve to be with him if you lost the 1 thing that could bring you closer… a child. Trust me when I say this being away from the 1 you love because of this it’s very painful you go into a deeper depression. Still I won’t kick you out of my apartment because you won’t talk too him, but still try.”

Kristy looks at me and smiles, “I guess I should listen too you counting on what happened last year after you kicked Yongguk out of the apartment.”

I wince as I place a hand on my neck where I had tried to cut my jugular and would have died if not for my mother.

I look away from her with my hand still resting on my neck, “Yeah… take me as an example of what you can turn into.”

I turn away from her and stomp out of the room angry that I’m letting my emotions get the best of me.

I look up too see my sister walk into my apartment with Himchan ignoring my annoyance with her boyfriend I jump into her arms.

I know I’m weeping like I baby… something my baby didn’t get the chance to do, but I need my sister really bad right now so I can have the courage to talk too Yongguk.

Mina wraps her arms around my and hushes me and I know she’s looking up glaring at Kristy who just came from my last spare room.

Mina’s POV

I didn't expect my sister too jump into my arms crying when i entered her apartment and right away I know I will have to kill someone.

I know just who when I see Jin Kyoung’s friend Kristy walk out of her spare room.

I pull my sister back and say, “Let’s go to your room to talk.”

I spot the box under her arm and how she’s still holding it I have no clue.

I point at Kristy while I give her a dirty look and she looks away from me.

As I pull my sister into her room she falls down to the floor crying right as I shut the door.

“Jin Kyoung are you alright?”

She shakes her head, “I know she’s my friend and I’m worried about her, but she knows just the right way too hurt me.”

I clench my fist behind my back as I lean against the door, “Jinnie,” I know a struck a cord when I said her old nickname I’d call her, “I know you want to help people and look after your friends, but if they hurt you like Kristy just did maybe you should have them learn a lesson on their own without your guidance. THe one who needs guidance and help isn’t them, but you. YOu need someone to help stand you up nice and tall so you can be strong. The only person who has ever been able to do that successfully was Yongguk, because he loved you so much that he could feel the vibrations of your heart.”

I know she has no idea what I just said to her… but I know she’s slowly understanding me.

She nods her head, “I guess you're right… but how will Yongguk react to the truth?”

I slide down the door so I’m face to face with my sister as I say, “Trust me sweetie… Yongguk will understand sweetie… I’d just be careful with how you word everything. ! wrong phrase and he might be mad for a while, but not for long. What was the longest he’s ever been mad at you?”

I seemed to lighten her mood because she whispers, “It was only a day and that was because he had to practice. When he got home he begged me not to be mad at him.”

I smile as my sister’s mood lightens I just hope that it’s one of those days… I don’t need the 2 of them hurting more than they already are especially my baby sister. My baby sister is pretty sensitive towards a lot of things.

As I watch her smile I slide over to her and wrap my arms around her waist.

Yongguk’s POV

I watched Mina pull Jin Kyoung into Jin’s bedroom.

I stop in my thoughts… Jin it’s been a while since I’ve called her that name she would always get mad at me cause she said that was too boyish.

I smile slightly then I look up at Kristy too see that she looks like I just told her I killed her dog.

I stand up and walk over to her, “Kristy… are you alright?”

“I think I made her mad at me.”

“What do you mean?”

She looks up and I notice that the guys of BAP are all pushing themselves towards the living room so I pull Kristy too the kitchen,

“I brought up why she was hospitalized.”

“How was she?”

She shakes her head, “I won’t tell you it’s not my place, but please no matter what she says please get back together with Jin Kyoung. She needs you. So no matter what she tells you you'll accept it and take her back.”

“What do you mean?”

Kristy must know about what happened over a year ago. Kristy must know about Jin’s miscarriage.

“It’s not my place too say… Still Yongguk talk to her have her tell you what happened on your guy’s anniversary for her to throw you out of the apartment. Ask her what happened that day I think she’s ready to tell you.”

I look at her holding in my tears but it doesn’t work, “What’s so secretive that I can’t know? What is it that I can’t know about my girl.. ex being the hospital that day?”

Kristy looks up at me and pats my shoulder, “Trust me it’s not something horrible… in some sense. It’s still explains her spout of depression for a few months and even being hospitalized.”

“Hospitalized… I think Mina told me that she was hospitalized for a short while because of her depression.”

“I will tell you this without you there by her side she was torn to pieces never sure of anything and became clinically depressed. So Yongguk if you listen to what she has to say you can’t leave her side ever again, you understand.”

I nod my head, “I don’t think I could stand too know that it if I harmed her again. Jin Kyoung is a strong woman, but all strong woman know pain. If there’s something I should know can you tell me now?”

“Be careful if you ever touch her neck.”

“What why?”

“I didn’t tell you this but a month after she kicked you out of the apartment she tried to kill herself by cutting the arteries in her neck she would have died if she didn’t hesitate. Lucky for her too that her mother had come into the apartment.”

I don’t move as she says this, “She tried to kill herself… by cutting .”

… Wait didn’t she once say that 1 of the people she looked up too only flaw was that they killed themselves by cutting their throat to keep their families honor.

Flashback

I’m lying in bed with Jin in my arms and she’s only paying attention too the book in her hands.

I took it and read the page, “This woman is selfish.”

“I think so too, but she had lost her child and her family looked down on her for that. The only way for her family too regain their honor and too be saved she had to die. She believed that if she cut she’d die quicker or at least lose conscious fast enough.”

I had given her a look of disbelief, “That’s horrible still. What about her loved ones sure they might understand, but she would be missed greatly.”

“What would you do if you found out I did something like that?”

“I’d follow you,” I told her without hesitating.

“What?” she asked shocked.

“I said I’d follow you into the afterlife, because I wouldnt be able to live without you.”

“What if we had a child or broken up?”

“If we had a child I’d live to make sure that they knew who their mother was and how much I loved you. If we were broken up I’m sure I’d die to no matter the reason why we broke up I’d die with you.”

I remember her shocked face but in the end she smiled at me and kissed me gently as she snuggled into my chest.

“Wow this is why I love you Yongguk, but you better never try to kill yourself.”

I nodded my head as I rested it on his head, “I won’t as long as you don’t.”

We had left the conversation at that… now that I think about it that was the last night that I spent with her.

End of Flashback

I look up to see Mina walk out of Jin’s room and when she sees me she walks up to me and says, “Jinnie, would like to talk to you… I’m going to drag the guys out of the apartment. We’ll be back in about half an hour.”

I smile as I watch her push the guys fighting with her that they want to stay.

I shake my head as I smile but stop when I see Jin Kyoung leave her bedroom with a box in her hands.

“What’s in the box?” I can’t help but to ask.

“Oh… It’s my big secret at why… I’m scared too love you.”

I’m a bit worried by what she has in the box, but I open it too see a copy of a hospital's record.

I look over it and I feel my guts twist, “How did you get this? How did this happen? OMG…”

I know I”m crying as I look up at her and she places her hands on her stomach, “Yes, I lost our baby.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” it’s not that I didn’t know but I want to know why she didn’t at least tell me.

“Cause I didn’t think  you had a right to know cause I thought you cheated on me.”

“You’re kidding me right. I’d had a right to know even if I was cheating on you.”

“If you were dating would it matter yoru child.. my child would be dead.”

I stare down at her and ask without thinking, “Where did the scar on your neck come from?”

The way she looks up at me hurts me most of all things, “Get out.”

Her voice had wavered through the tears.

“No,” I tell her, “I promised your sister and Kristy that I wouldn’t leave your side ever again no matter what you told me about what happened the day you threw me out of our apartment. Even though I hated how you worded that I’m not leaving.”

Your POV

I can’t believe it’s out and not we’re both mad at each other… and Yongguk is being the reasonable one here… alright so I’ve always been pretty unreasonable.

Hi it's alwaysdreaming just thought I'd stop in after this to tell you that I plan to update more often since I have my new job under a bit more control and have my own laptop that has a nice system installed in it. I hope to update more often so please wish me luck and cheer me on. I'm sorry it's been so long. Fighting!