The next few days flew by like leaves in the wind. Before you knew it, the boys and I were getting on the bus to head to the beach for our break from midterms. Let me tell you, I had never been more excited in my life. I’ve never done anything like this before; a weekend trip with school much less with my friends and… and Yongguk.

It was Yongguk, Jongup, Zelo, Daehyun, and I with the rest of the intensive students on five buses. Luckily, we all got to sit together on the same bus, Yongguk and I, Jongup and Zelo behind us, and poor Daehyun by himself. He was carrying himself in a confident manner yet you could tell he was trying to cover up hidden feelings.

“Mmm Zelo” I heard a whispered moan. I prayed to God Yongguk didn’t hear it.

“YAH!”

Yup… he heard it.

Instantly Yongguk stood up and turned around, “get your in hands off Zelo!”

“Appa!”

“Yongguk stop!” I screamed as I stood to try to hold my boyfriend back.

I examined Zelo, his face wearing misty watering eyes and then to Jongup, terrified for his life. If it was one thing that Yongguk was, it was intimidating.

“You need to let him grow up! Stop protecting him from the things he needs to experience! Like his first boyfriend!” I scolded.

“Eomma…” Zelo blushed obviously embarrassed.

“YAH! You’re supposed to be on my side babe!”

“You’re ridiculous” I said as I pushed Yongguk over and walked to sit with Daehyun.

“Baby!”  Yongguk called after me.

I playfully ignored him as I smiled at Daehyun, “Hi” I said laying my head down on his shoulder.

“Chet…” I heard Yongguk scoff but I continued to ignore.

“DaeDae, what’s wrong?”

“Hah, what do you mean Himchan? I’m fine. If anything I should be asking you the same question. Yongguk too much?” He joked referring to the scene prior.

I rolled my eyes disregarding the Yongguk reference and then lowered my voice, “Dae… I can tell something’s bothering you. Don’t play like everything’s fine. Let’s talk?”

“Himchan… I’m not Zelo, you know. I’m not your “son” I can take care of myself”

“But I’m your hyung, so talk to me”

He sighed.

…

…

…

“Youngjae…” his words sounded heavy.

“Youngjae?” I asked.

“Youngjae!” he almost shouted, obviously venting frustration.

I watched as tears were building up. I rubbed Daehyun’s shoulder for support, “What’s going on?”

“I- He’s driving me CRAZY! There’s no denying it anymore, I-I like Y-youngjae.” He grew a sad smile.

I gave him a reassuring smile, “That’s great Dae!”

“It’s not great. I a-asked him to ride with us on the bus and to meet me by the cafeteria to walk together to the buses, but – but… he never came. He never came hyung!” a single tear fell from his eye, “I guess the feeling isn’t mutual”

My heart shattered. I had never seen Daehyun so broken up before. It was quite obvious that this - whatever it was- was real. I could see the pain written clearly across his first like an elementary alphabet book. So comprehendible: so broken.

“Dae…” I began to wrap my arms around him.

“Mianhae” Daehyun cried slightly into my shoulder.

“Shh… it’s okay Dae… it’s okay”

Several hours later after a quiet bus ride, we ended up in beautiful Busan. We pulled up in front of an older hotel that looked fairly ran down yet it contained a faint charm. In my eyes it seemed magical, special. I knew something was wondrous about this place, I just didn’t know what just quite yet.

We took our first steps off the bus.

“Ew… this place is old and smelly” Zelo whined.

“Ah stop, you’ll enjoy it after you get settled in” Jongup threw in.

Zelo frowned.

I started at Daehyun who hadn’t said a word since his breakdown and then to Yongguk whose glance was on me.

“Can you forgive me?” he grinned, gums gleaming in the sun.

It was honestly all a game, and with Yongguk, I could never seriously be mad at him.

“Gukkie… I was never mad. I-”

“Good” he smiled wrapping his arms around my waist while bringing me into a gentle kiss.

“Ew…” Zelo whined again.

I heard Daehyun chuckle as I blushed…

“You left me all alone during the bus ride, I missed my girlfriend.” Then he grinned, “You’re gonna pay tonight Himchannie”

I blushed even deeper, “h-hyung…”

He countered it with a laugh, while Zelo’s face was still covered in disgust.

Being the “man”, Yongguk lifted my several bags – I over packed to everything – and his single bag while we walked together to our room; room 611, top floor.

We got to the old wooden door, unlocked it only to enter into a small piece of paradise. It was beautiful, yet simple. The room was smaller in size, yet contained a beautiful wooden framed queen size bed with royal purple cotton bedding. The walls were painted a sunset orange, and several exotic plants decorated the room. Lastly, a small wicker table and chair was pushed aside in the corner; a perfect summer getaway. Yongguk set our bags down and pushed me onto the bed.

“Gukkie!” I giggled.

“I’m ” he said plainly.

I laughed, “I can tell”

He knew I was still uncomfortable with the whole “ual encounter” thing so he moved slow and gentle. With care, he began to kiss me as he fidgeted with the buckle of his pants. I could already feel him getting hard. I would never get used to it as my face warmed up. His kisses felt like heaven a perfect partner to this paradise. I loved the way-

“Hyungs!!!!!” the door knocked.

“Mother fu-”

“What Zelo?!” I cut off Yongguk as he smashed himself into the bed.

“Can’t we just ignore him?” he joked.

I rolled my eyes.

“We all wanna go to the beach let’s go!”

Actually that didn’t sound half bad. I looked to Yongguk, he seemed disappointed.

“I promise… tonight Gukkie” I rubbed his shoulder.

“Only for you babe” he said with a sigh.

After changing Yongguk, Zelo, Jongup, Daehyun, and I made our way to the beach. It was more breathtaking than imaginable. I had only experienced the ocean a few other times in my life, it… it made me curious. I couldn’t wait to go in.

We set up our umbrella and towels about 50 feet from the edge of the water, enjoying the slight mist of the tide. Zelo and Jongup instantly ran off beginning to tease each other as Daehyun left to walk by himself – most likely to sulk. Yongguk took his position in the sun as he took off his tank top revealing his Greek sculpture like abs. I loved his body…I felt slightly self-conscious as I took off my own shirt. I was in nowhere near as good as shape as him, but my stomach was toned. I was always referred to as fragile… whatever that meant.

“You need sunscreen” Yongguk ordered, “lay on your stomach”

“Are you sure this isn’t a way for you just to rub my body?” I joked.

“You caught me” Yongguk admitted yet he didn’t even care, “How can I resist rubbin lotion on my girlfriend’s y body, it’s better than jerkin off”

“Yongguk!”

He laughed and his hand gently collided into my back. Yongguk knew EXACTLY how to touch me how to treat me. He started to massage the sunscreen into me, knowing the exact amounts of pressure to use and my exact level of comfort. He ran his fingers down the middle of my spine resulting in me to arch my back and let out a light moan in satisfaction.

“Damn, Himchan… I can’t resist myself if you do that” he half growled.

“I- M-mianhae” I said innocently.

He continued to cover the rest of my body in sunscreen.

“Done…” he said with a disappointed tone.

“I-I…” I became flustered knowing he was disappointed because he was done rubbing… me.

“You don’t know what you do to me Himchan” he lied down, arms behind his head.

I didn’t know what to say… luckily Zelo called me.

“Eomma! Come in the water!” he laughed.

“Araso!” I screamed back watching Yongguk not move a single muscle as I got up.

“Be careful” he warned.

I nodded my head and somehow, even with his eyes closed, Yongguk saw it.

I made my way to the water extremely excited to enter, yet something strange was building up in my gut… was it nerves? When I finally reached the lines of the tide I slowly began to walk into the slightly cold water until I got to about knees height. It felt… ah-mazing. I titled my head back enjoying the feeling of the contrast created between the hot summer sun and the cool water. In the background I heard Zelo’s and Jongup’s laughs getting quieter obviously heading away from the water.

I wanted more of the cool feeling. I walked deeper in… deeper and deeper, eyes closed.

Chest deep; that’s when it got a little too cold, for a minute the sun was covered and a wave collided into me. My body easily succumbed to the pressure as I was pushed underneath the current. Not expecting the wave, I swallowed a large amount of the extremely salty water and began to panic as I was pushed further away from land. I was petrified, but I couldn’t even feel it. I tried to swim, but instead my throat burned from the amounts of water I was swallowing. My lungs were beginning to collapse. I tried to reach my feet towards land but resulted in fettle kicks to open water. I screamed in pain mixed with pure terror into the nothingness that was being submerged.

Y-Yongguk…