Chapter 10

“No.” It was pretty simple. Junmyung was just asking for too much.  And he was asking the wrong person, on top of that.

“Junmyung-ah, I can’t do that. I at history.” Wu Fan could not stress this enough.

“Just once! Please! I’m too busy to help him myself…” The shorter guy begged with his puppy eyes and kind face.

“Ask someone else.” The blonde did not give in.

“The only ones available are Baekhyunnie, Yeollie and Duizhang-hyung. And you can’t expect me to ask the two idiots to tutor Sehun, right?” Junmyung explained frantically while delivering some glasses of bubble tea.

“And Kyungsoo?” Kris suggested, taking a step back to avoid the tray his friend was holding threateningly close to his shoulder.

“Kyungsoo is at a cooking competition out of the city. Jongin went with him too.” The other sighed looking considerably tired by the workload.

Kris wasn’t a sensitive person. So, in the end, he shouldn’t have budged at the pitiful face Junmyung was making.

He shouldn’t have, yet he did; perhaps thanks to the bubble tea his friend treated him, or maybe because the other choice would be to stay in and study with Chanyeol for the night.

He couldn’t avoid the curly-haired boy anymore, since he, himself, had said it was ridiculous to be this way with his friend.

Still, if he had a chance to avoid being alone, in a small room, with a certain tall, crazy Korean guy with whom he might or might not be in love, he’d take it.

“Fine, I’ll do it, but you’ll regret it.” The blonde told Jumnyung dramatically.

Later that night, as Wu Fan sat across a distressed Sehun in a quiet corner of the café, staring desperately at the front page of a heavy history book, he realized, Junmyung was definitely going to regret this.

“Duizhang-hyung, I don’t get it.” Sehun repeated for the millionth time that night.

“Well, I don’t get it either, so stop whining.” Kris, who was reaching his limit, retorted.

“So why did the Silla Kingdom start the war?” Sehun chewed on his pencil’s end nervously.

Honestly, the Canadian had no idea why the Silla Kingdom had started a war, or who was the war against, or when the war had taken place or why the hell would ancient Koreans call their kingdom ‘Silla’, in the first place.

All he could think of was that South Korea was colored orange in the map on the cover of Sehun’s history book and orange clashed awfully with Japan’s vivid purple right next to it. The creator of this map had no fashion sense whatsoever, Kris criticized.

Then, he thought of Chanyeol’s bright orange shoes and his dark purple jeans that didn’t look half bad and how was that possible.

“Hyung are you even listening to me?” The highschooler scowled at him.

“I already told you, I have no idea. I kept up until page 87, shouldn’t you be thankful?” Sehun was not thankful. He complained that dozing off in the middle of the ‘class’ was very unprofessional and that the tutor should at least understand these things in order to explain them to the student.  

“Well, the tutor doesn’t understand. Can’t you just ask your parents to pay for a real tutor?” Wu Fan grouched.

“I could…” There was something hesitant in the maknae’s voice. “I could but I want to do well on my own and impress them. They’re already stressed out since I told them I like guys, I don’t want them to worry about my failing History too.” He whispered fiddling his fingers.

“You told them?!” Kris was astonished.  “Did they take it well?”

 “Mum had suspected it, so she wasn’t too shocked. Dad, might need some time to accept it, though. Still, I’m relieved, I had expected much worse. They said my life would be hard and that people wouldn’t be too supportive, but they were still proud of me.” The blonde smiled at the boy’s words. He was feeling proud about the young boy too, for taking his advice and being so brave.

“What about you, hyung? What about your family? How did they take it?” Sehun put down his pencil and stared at his hyung closely.  

If Wu Fan had a security system instead of a brain, the siren would be wailing at the moment and the red light in his head would be .

Without knowing it, the maknae had hit a nerve.

“My family is in Canada, so it doesn’t matter. Just drop it.” His voice was low and threatening, making the unsuspecting boy flinch a little in his seat.

Quietly, Sehun nodded and returned to his notes.

“Sehun-ah, I have an idea.” The older guy’s tone changed suddenly.

“W-what?” Sehun inquired timidly.

“I at History and so do you, which means there’s no hope with us working on our own.” The Canadian started. “However, I know somebody who majors in Korean History.”

The young boy’s eyes shone excitedly. “Who is it?”

Kris smirked. A certain foulmouthed friend owed him a favor from a week ago and now it was time to cash it.

“Hello?” Luhan’s clueless voice came on the other side of the line.

“Luhan?” He asked even though he knew it was him. “You remember how I got Zitao off your back last week, right?”

“You told him you’d find me a new boyfriend so that I would stop being a pain. How is that ‘taking him off my back’?” Luhan was really being a pain, Kris thought.

“I said that, but I won’t be doing it, you idiot. What am I, a matchmaker?” The blonde said like it was the most obvious thing on earth and heard the other guy gasp.

“Oh! In that case I’m listening.” He said and Luhan indeed listened while the Canadian explained the problem with Sehun’s History knowledge, or lack thereof.

“Pass him the phone.” The Chinese guy ordered finally and Wu Fan obliged.

“Luhan-sshi?” Sehun asked, a small smile blooming on his face. “This is Oh Sehun. Yes, we talked before. Not so great I’m afraid, please help me! Yes, I know that era. Ok, I will.” He opened the history book and read a passage to the phone.

“I’ve already read it twice.” Sehun replied some questions that the blonde was lucky enough not to hear.

“Yes, I get it. Wait, give me a second to write that down. Yes, the Silla Kingdom’s economy is on that page, how did you know that? You have the same book?! Seriously?” The conversation continued like that for a good half hour when Sehun put the phone down with a smile that reached his ears.

“Luhan-sshi is… Wow! I think I became smarted just by listening to him.” Sehun stared at the phone with a dazed expression.

Kris snorted. “Or maybe you just got stupider. Look at your face. It’s like you stayed out in the sun for too long.”

At that point Sehun stuck out his tongue at his hyung.

“What kind of person is Luhan-sshi?” He asked still a little shaken, the effect of absorbing too much information too fast, in Wu Fan opinion.

“Luhan?” The older guy frowned thoughtfully. “He’s a rude and annoying brat.” He answered after a second.

“No way… You said that before, but this time I won’t believe you. Tell me the truth.” Sehun was more observant than Kris wanted to admit.

“Luhan is a very old friend. He seems easy-going to people who just met him, but in reality he’s very pig-headed when it comes to personal matters. And unlike his innocent face, his mind is M rated. Still, he’s a good and caring friend.” He explained with more detail and the high school student looked satisfied.

“Is he good-looking too?” Suddenly, Kris realized that the maknae’s problem was not acquiring too much knowledge too fast. His problem was talking to Luhan for too long. The Canadian knew his Chinese friend was attractive, yet he didn’t expect his charm to be acoustic as well as visual.  

Wu Fan wouldn’t exactly mind a relationship between Sehun and Luhan, but the boy wasn’t even legal yet and Luhan, despite looking so cute and innocent was quite the player. All in all, maybe not the ideal couple.

So, Kris decided to not stir trouble. Sehun was better off not making crazy, teenage dreams about himself and Luhan during his exam period. In case Luhan wished to return to Korea one day, or Sehun decided to move to China, they could have their shot; until that day, though, Wu Fan was going to keep these two at a safe distance from each other.

“Luhan? Good-looking?!” The blonde laughed. “He’s hideous. His face is like a mouse or a … cockroach.”

“How’s a cockroach’s face like?” Sehun interrupted but Kris paid him no attention.

“He has big front teeth, like a rabbit and ugly hair. He’s short and his hands are longer than his feet. Sadly, he showers only once a month and he goes around wearing sweatpants and over-sized T-shirts all the time.” He might have gone a little too far with it, in retrospect.

“Really?” Sehun raised both eyebrows. “Well, I guess you can’t have everything… It would make me jealous, if he was smart and hot…”

“I’m both smart and handsome.”  Kris pointed out.

“Yeah and also messed up.” The maknae added blankly.

“Yah!” The blonde glared at his student.

“But you are, hyung!” Sehun insisted.

Despite his protests, Kris knew he was messed up.

He had spent three years all alone, in a foreign country, living in a way he’d never dreamt he’d live. He had given up on his dreams, lost his self-respect and learnt exactly how it feels to contemplate suicide and knowing, being sure about it actually, that no one would even care about it.

He’d been thinking about that lifestyle lately.

How empty it was, how lonely and how depressing.

But all that had changed.

Because Park Chanyeol had started a fire next to him; Park Chanyeol, who started fires wherever he went.

And Wu Fan was living off of that fire, drinking off of it and he was afraid that if he continued, one day the fire would drain and die out.

From the very beginning, he had no doubt that he’d feel sorry for causing Chanyeol’s fire to disappear.

What he hadn’t expected was the pain, the actual anguish, even at the idea of seeing the boy’s smile fade.

To fall in love, he hadn’t expected that either.

Why would he like the only person whom he’d be better off hating?

This wasn’t a movie, nothing close to a script being played out, so why did this have to happen?

It wasn’t romantic to have forbidden feelings for Park Chanyeol. It was awkward and painful and frankly, downright ridiculous.

Kris didn’t feel like being in love with the guy he was deceiving.

All the same, he was.

Awkwardly and painfully and frankly… ridiculously in love with the guy.

The Canadian swore under his breath. He had promised himself not to think about it. It wasn’t like it would change anything, anyway.

He had to follow the orders he was given by Park Sukjin Hwejangnim for a while longer.

Just a while longer.

Just a little bit more of this warmth.

“I’m worried about you, Duizhang-hyung. I really am.” Sehun poked his arm, making him jump on the spot.

“Worry about yourself instead. Don’t you have a big exam in two days?” Wu Fan shrugged the boy away annoyed.

“Oh! Right!” The maknae’s eyes widened in realization. He picked up his pencil and returned to his book, zealously taking notes and whispering to himself.

The older guy chuckled.

At least someone was doing better, he thought.

An hour later, the blonde was almost asleep on his chair. Sehun didn’t seem to need him anymore. In fact, every time he even attempted to say something, the highschooler shushed him rudely.

‘Luhan-sshi says I have to do this using my own abilities’ or some other bull, was all the explanation Kris got as a thank-you for spending his evening reading a frustratingly detailed history book, whose illustrator was clueless enough to make South Korea orange and Japan purple.

Not that the Canadian was up to it, but just because he didn’t feel like sleeping on an uncomfortable chair for another hour, he announced that he was going to the movies and sent Sehun home early to study on his own, as ‘God Luhan’ had willed it.

The boy didn’t seem to appreciate the ‘God Luhan’ joke a lot, yet he agreed to go home.

Kris was about to head to the movies, still not certain as to why he was going there in the first place, when Eyeliner Baekhyun called.

Apparently, he was with Chanyeol, who, not unlike the blonde, was not in a good mood.

Wu Fan wanted to know why crazy Chanyeol was feeling down, but he didn’t ask.

“Sure, you guys can come too.” He muttered, instead and headed back to buy two more tickets.

“But why a romantic comedy?” Baekhyun whined as he arrived and saw their tickets.

Kris glared at him.

He wanted to see how Hollywood directors portrayed lovesickness. Then he was planning to laugh dryly and announce that they didn’t have a clue about what being in love feels like.

“I am doing my research.” The Canadian stated seriously.

Baekhyun was ready to ask more about it when the blonde beat him to it.

“Besides, I’m buying, so shut up.” He added and turned his attention to the other guy.

Park Chanyeol did seem down.

He had dark circles under his eyes and he was looking around, not with the usual curiosity, but rather with a blank stare. His curls didn’t dance around his face that night and even his clothes looked darker and shabbier than usual.

“What’s up with Park Chanyeol?” Wu Fan whispered to Baekhyun.

“He doesn’t sleep, doesn’t eat and he’s more vacant than usual. His hair doesn’t fall crazily either. Apparently, he finally went crazy.” The shortest of the three shook his head sadly at the pitiful presence next to him.

The blonde hadn’t noticed all that. Not until that day. He had thought Chanyeol had been normal lately. They had made up and everything was great between them, so what about the dark circles and the blankness?

Besides, how had he missed all that, when they spent every day together?

As if reading his mind, Baekhyun hurried to explain. “He didn’t want you to see. He keeps saying that he doesn’t want to be a bother to you.”

Kris narrowed his eyes.

“And so he’s being a bother to you…” He quickly apologized to Eyeliner Baekhyun about the younger boy’s behavior and pushed Chanyeol’s soulless body out of the movie theater.

“Duizhang?” The curly-haired boy mumbled in disarray.

“Did you only notice me now?” The Canadian rolled his eyes.

Why was he even in love with such an idiot?

“Aren’t we going to the movies?” Chaneyol looked at the cars speeding in the street next to them.

“Baekhyun has been putting up with your antics the whole week. I’m giving him the night out.” Wu Fan gave a call to Kyungsoo and Jongin to tell them that he had two tickets for a boring romantic movie with their names on them and that Baekhyun was already waiting for them in the theater.

If they didn’t show up, after ten minutes of pep talk, it was not his problem anymore, he consoled himself.

He took two beers out of a convenience store and offered one to the younger guy who was fretting suddenly and refused to look him in the eye.

“What’s wrong?” Kris had barely finished his question, when the Korean confessed the truth.

“I am.” He blurted out.

The Canadian furrowed his eyebrows at that.

“I thought Park Chanyeol was never wrong…Why is Park Chanyeol wrong?” He repeated the boy’s name playfully. It left a sweet taste in his mouth and made his heart speed up just enough to make him feel alive.

“I’m causing trouble.” The curly-haired boy sighed. “More correctly, I’m planning to cause trouble.”

“Why would you do that?” Kris sipped from his bottle and looked away at the cars passing by.

“Because I want to.” The boy nodded, as if assuring himself of his intention.

“I don’t get it.” Apparently, Chanyeol didn’t want to tell the whole story, so the other was getting curious and worried.

Unexpectedly, Wu Fan found himself sitting opposite to an excited guy who was now looking straight at him ready to burst in tears, or laughter at any moment.

On the one hand, it was good that the boy had regained his energy and was looking as lively as ever. On the other, the blonde was feeling rather flustered as he saw all those emotions being freely displayed on the other’s face.

“I’m planning to make trouble, Duizhang. I know it’s stupid, but I want to.” Chanyeol said.

“If I do it, I’ll regret it. Still. I want to say it. I’ve been wanting to say them for a while now, those burdensome words.” He laughed a little soundlessly.

“And it’s not fair, because you got away with it, but I won’t. Should I just get drunk and do whatever pops in my head? Will I be forgiven then? Aish, I can’t get drunk…” His words were getting more and more confusing for Kris who just watched, mesmerized, the lips that opened and closed feverishly.

“I can’t sleep. I don’t eat much and I don’t care about a lot of things lately. I have something to say, but I shouldn’t. What am I supposed to do, Duizhang?” Now, the boy was panting, his chest heaving quickly.

“I don’t feel like telling you what to do.” Kris shook his head. “You know what’s best for you.”

“Best for me?!” The younger guy exhaled a breath full of stress. “I do know. However, what is best for me might be bad for you.”

The Canadian thought about that. Chanyeol must have noticed it too; the fact that they couldn’t both be happy. If Kris pursued his goals, which he had already done, Chanyeol would get hurt. If Chanyeol did what he wanted, Kris would be burdened. As it turned out, this stupid deal worked both ways.

“The truth is,” The blonde started cautiously, “what is best for me, will make you sad too. So it’s ok. Just say whatever you want.”

The curly haired boy pouted childishly. He seemed discouraged again, upon hearing this.

“I don’t like things to be this way.” He mumbled.

“Even if you don’t, just say it.” The other whispered.

“Duizhang…” He started but Wu Fan put a hand over his mouth and stopped him.

“No.” The older guy said strictly. “Since it’s going to be the truth, since you’re going to be serious about it, you have to call me by my real name. No more nicknames.”

Kris didn’t know why he was asking for this, out of nowhere. He had never been bothered by his nickname before. He had felt happy about it; about the sense of intimacy it created. Yet, at that particular moment, he wanted the younger boy to call him by his real name.

Of course, he wasn’t delusional enough to think that Chanyeol, upon calling his name, would feel the same sweetness and pain that he felt, stabbing his chest ruthlessly, every time he said the boy’s name. Nevertheless, his cruel and hurt mind wanted to see if the other guy felt even a little different than usual, when he called his name.

“Wu Fan…” It was a fainting sound, not even a whisper, which made the owner of the name blush just as much as Chanyeol was blushing as he said it.

“Hm. Yes. I suppose I have to say it calling you that. Because it’s not a joke.” The boy closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, gathering courage.

“I’m in love with you, Wu Fan.” Said Chanyeol and it was pretty simple, but Wu Fan’s brain could hardly process it.

A/N: So... as promised new chapter today.

I would like to apologize for the lack of fluff and intimacy. I'm a little slow at those things...

>.<

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