Chapter 10

The Start of Spring in his Heart

            Darkness covered everything as the cold breath of winter blew once more, leaving traces of the heaven’s white tears on the ground. There was no one outside the streets. And the serenity of that cold winter’s night overwhelmed all throughout. But that kind of serenity was that kind which haunts her inside. She could feel her heart beat with such intense restlessness and worries.

            Shin Hye breathed once more as she leaned closer to the frame of the window, seeing if someone would be coming anytime soon. But there was no sign at all. Only the pure white drops of the snow is what she can see. After few seconds, she looked up once again at the clock found at the wall. She’s been doing that routine—leaning at the window, expecting for someone, then checking the time at the clock hanging around—for nth hours already. Now, it’s already one o’clock in the morning yet, Suzy is not home still. There was no sign that she went home after the incident that had occurred at the bar where FT Island plays, and it was like she’s still not coming back. And that thought somehow scares her.

            She leaned her back at the glass window and shut her eyes off as she exhaled again. The serenity of the night makes her hear even the slightest noises, which she couldn’t really differentiate if it was the ticking of the clock, or the beat of her restless heart—and it was not helping at all. That’s just makes her feel more nervous about Suzy.

            She opened her eyes and picked up her phone from her pocket and dialed Suzy’s number. But just like the countless times she tried calling her tonight, there was no answer from her. And for the nth time also, she tried to reach for Jae Jin, but even his number was unattended. Jong Hoon told her a little while ago that Suzy was with Jae Jin, and that Suzy wouldn’t stop from crying, but he doesn’t know where the two went, or if Suzy is still with Jae Jin at this very moment.

           She in some air again, feeling an intensified restlessness that starts from her stomach up to her heart. It gives her that empty feeling, that she feels useless and hopeless at the same time. And she couldn’t help but to think about Suzy and how she is at the moment, especially when she knows she’s ruined and all. What if she do something crazy because of all the emotions she feels, or what if she is stuck in a bad situation? What if something bad happened to Suzy? She knows she couldn’t bear that. She would not forgive herself if something bad happened to her. She would forever blame herself for putting Suzy in that kind of situation.

            Feeling really helpless and worried, she resorted to the last and the least thing possible. Thinking twice, she dialed Hong Ki’s number. And she could swear her heart pounds louder than the ring of his phone. She doesn’t know how Hong Ki will take the situation especially that she clearly knows he has no care about his sister. The biggest possibility is that he would turn her down. But there is that small chance that he might feel at least a little concerned about his sister. Aside from that given fact, the reason why she is hesitant to call him is that because she is still annoyed at him for his being a jerk and a coward. She just doesn’t know if the remaining piece of patience she has can endure the stubbornness of this man. If it’s not only for Suzy, she wouldn’t want to talk to Hong Ki.

            “Hello,” she spoke softly, unsure of how she will talk to him after all that has happened. “Hong Ki?”

            Silence took over for what seemed like a long time. He didn’t bother to talk as expected of him, and she couldn’t figure out what right words to tell him.

            “Go, I’m listening,” finally, Hong Ki’s husky voice broke the awkward silence between the two of them in the line; something that she didn’t expect him to do.

            She heaved another deep breath to clear as she tries to pick up the right words in the back of her mind.

            “This is about Suzy,” she finally told him, expecting that she would hear the busy tone of the phone after. However, he didn’t bring the call to an end. But still, he remained silent at the other end of the line as if he was waiting for her to continue.

            “She hasn’t come home yet,” she revealed. “Jong Hoon told me that she was with Jae Jin after you went away, and I followed you, but he isn't sure if they are still together. I tried to call them both several times but there was no answer,” she paused for a while, waiting for a response or even a violent reaction from Hong Ki but he still holds on the other line silently as if he was listening intently.

            “I-I’m… worried about her Hong Ki,” she said when he didn’t seem to say something. “I’m worried about your sister. Really worried! I mean, it’s already passed one o’clock in the morning and she’s not home yet. She’s mad at me, for sure. And she’s ruined and hurt and everything… What if something bad happens to her? I wouldn’t really forgive myself if anything happens to her!”

            Silence once again roamed between the two of them after she told him her concerns. It’s a silence that makes her hear the loud thumping of her nervous heart, and the ticking of the clock, as if reminding her that time is elapsing. And each second they lose might be a second that anything can happen to Suzy. She was really anticipating Hong Ki’s words, but each second that passes also cuts her little patience remaining for him.

            “Hey, aren’t you going to tell something?” she yelled annoyed at him. “I know you are not in good terms with Suzy, your sister, but I just thought you’ll have even this little concern about her. But I guess you don’t.”

A fiery irritation is already building up in her system. She felt so annoyed at the way Hong Ki doesn’t respond at all even though he was listening. Doesn’t he even feel even the slightest worry in his heart for his sister?

“Fine, I guess I’ll just have to go find Suzy alone since you don’t even care!”

            “W-wait…” she was about to hang up when she heard Hong Ki’s unsure voice. “I’ll be there in few minutes. Let’s go and find her together.”

            Her heart beat rapidly with what Hong Ki has just said. It was something she doesn’t really expect from him that it made her forehead knotted. And she was stupefied there for a second that before she could even say a word, Hong Ki had already hang up to her.

            “Did I really hear it right? He’s going to come with me and find Suzy?” she mumbled softly as she gave her phone an unbelieving stare. It was something so unbelievable but she heard it clearly, it must be true.

            Slowly, she found herself smiling softly. Her heart seemed to suddenly feel at ease now.

            She stared at the window outside, staring at the heavenly white frost that falls. The winter will end soon, and Spring would soon come where flowers of Kanari would bring brightness and sunshine to his heart… though slowly… slowly...

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            Shin Hye scratched her hands together to somehow create some warmth. Though she has her winter gloves on, a thick woolen jacket and a beanie is covering and protecting her from the cold, she still couldn’t help but to tremble in the coldness she feels.

Slowly, she quietly stared at Hong Ki and scanned his face. His cheeks and lips are already red because of the crisp coldness of the air. She couldn’t read what is in his mind right at the moment. He was all silent since the time he came and fetched her. He only told her a word or two, and then he never talked again. But his silence now is different from that gloomy silence he always has in him.

            They are both sitting inside Hong Ki’s car which stopped in front of an apartment. And for a moment of silence, Hong Ki stared at the apartment’s closed door as if he was thinking something.

            “Where are we?” she asked softly.

            But instead of answering her simple question, Hong Ki just gave her a look before he went out of his car and walked towards the closed door of the apartment. And she was left at her seat with dropped open, unable to believe how rude, unpredictable and unexplainable Lee Hong Ki can be.

            “Seriously, do you even know how to answer a question properly?” she hissed in annoyance, puffing an air into her face to keep her cool down before she went out of the car and followed the jerk.

            “Are you saying something?” Hong Ki asked her when she reached his place without even turning to her. And that made her so annoyed. If it wasn’t really for the sake of Suzy, she wouldn’t want to deal with him just yet. Not when her patience is still not enough to comprehend his stubborn mind and attitude.

            “Nothing,” she sarcastically said, rolling her eyes. “Just talking to the wind.”

            Hong Ki gave her a stern look when he heard her answer. It seems like he didn’t like the sharpness in Shin Hye’s voice. However, he needed that kind of treatment. Serves him his own dose of medicine.

            Consequently, Hong Ki just rang the doorbell without any warning. And he rang it as if he doesn’t care if it bothers someone at this point of time. He rang it continuously like he wouldn’t stop until the owner of the house opens the door. And she bets that by the time the owner opens the door, he will be fuming mad at them for their irritating disturbance.

            Just like what she thought, in just a few seconds, she heard the door clicked open and someone emerged from it.

            “Jae Jin?” she blinked her eyes when she saw who was right there behind the door. So it was his house after all.

            Silence took over for a moment which seemed to be frozen for her, for Jae Jin and for Hong Ki. But it’s a silence that shouts and speaks for unspoken madness and anger. And it’s manifesting from the eyes of the two. Jae Jin is only staring at Hong Ki, his jaw tightened, fists clenched. Hong Ki, on the other hand, has his eyes burning with anger, giving Jae Jin his sharp stare. And right there at the moment, she felt that the cold and crisp breeze of winter heated up and intensified.

            “Hyung…” Jae jin spoke softly after some seconds, finally ending the silence that roamed for what seemed a long time, but definitely not ending the awkward intensity between him and his friend. “Shin Hye,” he added, finally recognizing her mere presence. But there is no cheeriness in his voice today like the way he always calls her.

            “Jae Jin,” she spoke softly, feeling the need to say something to somehow meddle. “I’m sorry to bother you late this night but—“

            “Where is she?” Hong Ki butted in before she could even finish her sentence.

            Jae Jin stared at Hong Ki for a while as if he is contemplating what his response would be.

            “She’s inside.”

            “Inside?!!!” Hong Ki yelled loudly, cupping Jae Jin at his shirt. His teeth is even gnashing now. And he is looking at him with all the madness in his eyes. “You really have the guts to bring her inside your house?!!”

            Jae Jin grinned slyly with Hong Ki’s words. And he gave him the same intense stare he’s been giving him all this while. He just couldn’t understand Hong Ki’s logic for fuming madness and anger at him now when he seemed not to give Suzy even a little respect and importance.

            “So what now hyung, acting like you’re a good and concerned brother? Stop it hyung!” he said sharply that must’ve hit his ego. He took his hands off him but before he could even do so, Hong Ki had already has his fist on his face, giving him a punch he didn’t see coming. It was one hard punch that made him kiss the floor, tasting the taste of his own blood on his lips.

            Wanting to get even with Hong Ki, Jae Jin immediately pulled himself up and throw an equally hard punch on Hong Ki’s face. He could feel the intensity of his irritation, madness and anger all wrapped up and filling the seeds of his veins. He is really angry at Hong Ki. Though he knows how self-centered and a jerk Hong Ki can be, this is the very first time he got mad him totally. He is a total jerk for treating Suzy as if she has no value, and an illogical idiot for acting the way he acts now.

            Shin Hye’s eyes widened with horror as she saw the two already involving themselves in a physical fight. It was supposed to be a simple and peaceful ‘getting-Suzy-back operation’ that she doesn’t understand why these two have to hurt and spat madness at each other.

            “Hey,” she said in her trembling voice. And as if it was automatic, she pulled herself in the middle of these two guys to stop them from fighting even more. “Stop it, you two! This isn't helping, you know! I just want to make sure that Suzy is okay that was why we are here!” she ranted.

            “Suzy will never be okay, Shin Hye, and that’s because of that fool!!” Jae Jin yelled, pointing his finger and glaring at Hong Ki. Hong Ki, on the other hand, really got a lot more pissed that he moved forward again as if he’s ready to attack Jae Jin again. However, she had stopped him immediately before he could even get near to Jae Jin.

            “STOP!!!” she yelled loudly at the top of her lungs. She can feel irritation rising up from her system. “I told you to stop, didn’t I?” She eyed the two one by one as if freezing them at their places. And it was good enough that they both got the message in her eyes. The two stayed quiet and stood still. However, she could still feel the intensity they are exchanging with their eyes.

            She sighed when she felt that the air somehow felt a little calmer. She looked at Jae Jin.

            “What happened Jae Jin? Why is Suzy here in your house? Why didn’t you bring her home instead?” she asked in her normal calm voice.

            “Suzy cried like forever when you both left,” he stated, glancing sharply at Hong Ki, and then returning his gaze back to her. “She was so destroyed. I tried to cheer her up, but when she saw a bar on our way when I was trying to comfort her, she went directly to it and drowned herself in alcohol.”

            “How dare you to even let her drink!” Hong Ki yelled angrily, moving like he’s going to punch Jae Jin again. “You let her fill herself with so much alcohol and then brought her to your home! Isn't it something out of the line? Are you even thinking, Lee Jae Jin?”

            “Does that mean you’re concerned?” Jae Jin said, full of sarcasm. “Oh c’mon, hyung! Do you even know why she drowned herself in alcohol? It’s because you made her feel so worthless! She wanted to forget even in the slightest second that her brother hurt her so much!”

            “Shut up!”

            “Why? The truth hurts? It’s you who should be blamed for. You know what; she even regrets the day she was born because she thinks that it was because of her that you’ve grown up a big fool! And now you’re acting like a concerned brother? That’s funny, hyung! You don’t even know how to treat her as a sister!”

“Who are you to tell that to me?!”

            “I’m someone who’s more concerned to your sister than you are to her!” Jae Jin yelled back angrily at Hong Ki.

            “Shut up, will you?!!” Shin Hye shouted at the two when they didn’t stop from fighting and yelling over and over again. “This is pointless!” She gave them her deathly stare to tell them that she isn't liking the way they are addressing what’s happening now. Their fight isn't making any progress. In fact, it was all nonsense. It wouldn’t make Suzy feel any better.

            Fortunately, the two held their tongues and stopped themselves from quarrelling even though she knows they are still giving each other a glare.

            “Where’s Suzy? How’s she?” she asked Jae Jin when everything fell into a somehow peaceful silence.

            “She’s sleeping at my room,” she saw Hong Ki’s fist clenched tightly when he heard what Jae Jin has just said. But she gave him a look to stop him from his further ranting.

“She was so drunk and I didn’t know her place so I brought her here so I can also take a look at her from time to time. I cannot let her be in that broken situation,” he continued.

            “But why didn’t you call me? You know we are dorm mates,” she reasoned out. “I also tried calling you but you didn’t answer any of it.”

            “I’m sorry. Suzy asked me not to take any calls from you. She really doesn’t want to go home. And I think she needed space from you. You know what you did, right?” he answered. “I just thought of the best way to somehow protect her. I’m sorry, Shin Hye.”

            She nodded silently, knowing for a fact that Jae Jin has a point. “Yeah, I understand that,” she said as she bit her lower lip, feeling he rush of guilt flowing through her veins. It was her fault after all.

            “Thank you for looking after her Jae Jin and I’m sorry for dragging you to this kind of situation,” she apologized.

            “It’s not you who should be sorry, Shin Hye,” Jae Jin said, glancing at Hong Ki.

            “I guess it’s best if we’ll bring Suzy back home now. I can look after her, don’t worry. And I also have to talk to her and apologize,” she said.

            “Alright,” Jae Jin nodded. Then, he slowly walked away from them, leading them to his room where Suzy is sleeping in his bed.

            “Suzy,” she whispered softly when she sat on the spaces left in the bed. She stared at her pretty face. It was tired and sad even in her sleep. Poor Suzy. “I’m so sorry…”

            Hong Ki, who is standing at a corner not far away, is looking intently at Suzy’s face. And for the first time in his entire life, he didn’t feel repulsive about her existence. Instead, he felt something that touched his heart when he saw her state right now. And he must admit he was too worried about his sister when Shin Hye told her she wasn’t home yet. And the main reason why he was fuming mad and all at Jae Jin was because he felt protective about his sister.

What if she wasn’t with Jae Jin, and she did all what she did with another guy who can't be trusted? It was something that an elder brother would really be mad about. But also, he knew Jae Jin was right. He was all of a sudden acting like a brother who cares when the truth is that he is the reason why she wanted to escape from the pain. She was rejected and shattered.

            Slowly, he walked towards the bed where her sister’s sleeping body is lying. And with all gentleness, he carried his sister in his arms, treating her as if she was a fragile glass. It was the first time he let herself be this close to Suzy. And never in his entire life that he thought he himself will break the walls he made just to encapsulate himself away from her and all the things that remind him of the pain. And for the first time also, he felt the affection of a brother for her. The affection he thought he never had, but has been just embedded deep down in his heart.

            Shin Hye smiled to herself. She was surprised to see Hong Ki putting his mask off, not bringing his walls up neither encapsulating himself.            The usual frigid and gloomy emotions in his face and eyes are not manifested right now. Instead, he looks tranquil now. And she can't help but to feel a small hope growing in her heart.

            “Jae Jin,” she turned to Jae Jin, giving him a huge serene smile. Jae Jin looked puzzled on the other hand. “Thank you so much,” she tapped her shoulders cheerfully. “Maybe, it wasn’t pointless after all.”

            “What?” Jae Jin wondered, but immediately got her point when he saw Hong Ki and Suzy. He let off a sheepish smile—a smile that hopes for the best.

            “Thank you for all you did,” Shin Hye once again patted his shoulder with a smile before she followed Hong Ki in the car.

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Hey'yo my dear readers and friends!! Finally, I've updated!

I know it was such a long time since my last update, and I'm so sorry... I just did a lot of things these past few weeks...

But I'm really really thankful to all of you who remained and waited patiently for my update. i know this isnt too much but I hope it suites you... I hope you all like this chapter...

Jae Jin is, well, over protective of Suzy here. hehe^^

Please comment and tell me your opinions. you can also upvote the story if it's deserving... Subscribe also to those who are not yet subscribed. i need two more to have 40 subscribers. please?? haha^^

Spread the HongShin love <3