"Rain?"

"Yeah" 

"I don't get it Jongin. Doesn't rain have connotations of bad things?"

"Well yeah, but love's kind of a bad thing. Do you have any idea how much sleep I lose because of Kyungsoo? Plus, I feel like such an idiot for never being able to talk to him. But i guess, essentially, love's a good thing, despite what you think. It’s like rain, it nourishes the earth, helps daisies grow.”

“Then shouldn’t Kyungsoo be described as your spring as opposed to 'your rain'?"

"You're over analyzing it."

"I'm not; I just want to understand your feelings."

"I know you do, but I don't think you can..." 

*

"Home is where the heart is" was number one on Baekhyun's list of most hated cliches. His mother had once called him heartless in a capricious moment of of anger but the veracity of the accusation had latched itself to his inner soul like a parasite. 

It was true: He had no heart.

It had distanced itself so far from his chest that nothing could bring it back. He supposed it was the price to pay for what he did...even though he meant well, even though he thought he did the right thing.

But now that it was over, Baekhyun could care less about being heartless.

Or perhaps he just didn't want to confront the truth. It was so much easier to let the prickling past recede behind you, let memories fade into a comforting oblivion.

Whatever it was, home definitely wasn't where his heart was. Home was the modest 700 sq. ft apartment he shared with Jongin. Two cozy bed rooms, a disorganized kitchen, a (somewhat) presentable living room and a jutting balcony that overlooked the panorama of Seoul. It was small, but comfortable. There were times when Baekhyun would have preferred to live alone but then Jongin would do something wonderful and remind him how much Baekhyun needed him.

He awoke around 6AM, 12 hours before his meeting with Park Chanyeol. His droopy eyes widened when they landed on the glass of milk and plate of delicate cookies placed on his bedside table. A note written in Jongin's typical navy-blue chicken scratch lay next to the treats. Baekhyun picked up the slip of paper and read the words aloud, imitating the deep undulations of his roommate's voice.

Morning hyung,

I won't be able to go to school with you today because I have to go meet Suho to discuss Sinmun's next edition. Anyway, I woke up extra-extra early and snuck into Luhan's apartment and stole some of his favorite cookies for you. 

Eat up, and relax okay? You're going to do great.

-Jongin

P.S When I snuck into Luhan's apartment, Sehun  was wearing a plastic crown and sleeping on the living room floor. Maybe he and Luhan were playing prince and princess last night? 

P.P.S I can't believe you're actually going to meet Park Chanyeol today. I mean you've been obsessed with the dude since you were eight years old. Sorry if I'm making you more nervous but I mean it's amazing. Good luck today hyung!

Baekhyun smiled, and then did something very uncharacteristic; he hugged the note, pressing it tightly to his heartless chest and patting it lovingly with his left hand. After the little embrace, he took one of the cookies in his hand and admired its fragility. Luhan was an impeccable baker.  His creations were perfect, and nobody could top him.

Occasionally he, Luhan and Kyungsoo would have a baking contest, but Luhan always won, always and by any means. (Then again Sehun wasn't exactly the most impartial of judges!). Jongin tried participating once, in the hopes of impressing Kyungsoo, but his rigorous mixing resulted in cake-batter on the ceiling, so he settled for watching the object of his affection bake (which wasn't half bad, since whenever Kyungsoo bent over to check the oven, Jongin got a fantastic view).

The chocolate chips of Luhan's cookie melted into a puddle of sweet decadence In Baekhyun's mouth and contrasted beautifully with the slight saltiness of the biscuit.

"Hmmm ..." he cooed to himself, a pink tongue cleaning the leftover crumbs on his bottom lip.

Baekhyun liked baking. It was a science, after all. The ingredients of a recipe had to be perfectly calculated and measured out.  For instance, In making a cake, you had to add just enough baking soda for it to rise, but not so much that it explodes in the oven. It drove Baekhyun nuts when Luhan deviated from the formula of a recipe. Nuts.

Baekhyun greedily grabbed another cookie, and savored its taste while mentally thanking Jongin a million times over for the wonderful breakfast that had in some indirect way made him feel a hell of a lot better about meeting the scientist.

*                      

School seemed like it would never end. Baekhyun tried focusing on his work but his mind lingered on Park Chanyeol. Often during the day, he looked down self-consciously at his attire: a light yellow shirt and dark slacks. Did he look okay? He'd heard somewhere that Chanyeol adored yellow, so he decided to wear a shirt that reflected something they had in common.

At lunch, he nipped down to the coffeehouse and was met by Luhan and Sehun asking him if he had enjoyed the cookies.

"I thought Jongin stole them." replied Baekhyun plopping down on a seat in front of them. 

Luhan smiled, and took a spoonful of mini apple pie. "He did, but he left an apology note."

"The er left me a note too."

"Oh really?" asked Sehun, raising his eyebrows seductively. The boy literally searched for ways to drop innuendos.

"It's not like that idiot. Besides.. both of you know how obsessed he is with Kyungsoo."

Luhan's eyes immediately widened at the change of topic. "So has he finally done anything, yet?"

"Nope, I doubt he'll ever get up the courage."

"But why? Kyungsoo's obsessed with Kai." replied Luhan, shamelessly dipping his spoon into Sehun's vanilla pudding.

"And that's exactly it. He likes Kai, not Jongin. Plus Jongin's scared that Kyungsoo would be disappointed that he's Kai instead of say, Suho." 

"Ah come on. Does he really think that Baekhyunnie?"

"Could you not call me that!?" 

"Is that any way to talk to your hyung?" said Sehun, obsequiously defending his Luhan. 

Baekhyun frowned and shook his head, seniority rules. Luhan patted Sehun's head, and then casually took another spoonful of the younger boy's vanilla pudding.

"You should learn some manners from Sehun," said Luhan in a comic tone. Baekhyun stuck his tongue out briefly to express his slight annoyance. 

"You guys are ridiculous."

"Excuse me! Stop talking in that tone." 

Luhan chuckled, and fed Sehun a morsel of apple pie. "Mmmm ... thanks hyung," replied the younger boy, smiling up at Luhan who gazed down at him with bright alert eyes. 

A little bit of vomit came up in Baekhyun's mouth in response to their lovey-dovey-let's-feed-each-other thing. He would never ever ever let anyone feed him. Ever.

"Is it yummy, Sehun-ah? I added extra sugar just for you," Luhan wiped some crumbs from the corner of the younger boy's pink lips. Sehun nodded, and stared up at him in admiration. 

"I couldn't ask for anything better, hyung." 

Baekhyun sighed, and took a few more ferocious bites of his sandwich before bidding the almost-lovers a hasty goodbye. 

"Good luck with the internship by the way!" cried Sehun loudly. A light blush warmed Baekhyun's cheeks. 

"How did you-"

Luhan and Sehun blinked simultaneously and said, "Jongin." 

"Well that explains it ... see you guys."

"Bye! Have fun with the crazy science dude." added Luhan.

"He's not crazy ... He's talented, eloquent, balanced in his thoughts and -"

"I'm like so totally obsessed with him?" interjected Dr.Chen, who seemed to have appeared out of nowhere. Both Luhan and Sehun held their laughter in and bowed to the teacher. 

"Dr.Chen! Hello." said Baekhyun softly, feeling slightly embarassed by what the professor had just said. 

"I thought I'd find you here, Baekhyun. So tell me, are you prepared for this afternoon?"

"Yeah ... I mean, I think so ..."

Dr.Chen snickered, and placed a firm hand on his student's tense shoulder. "Calm down; you seem anxious."

"Dr.Chen! Welcome to the coffeehouse," said Xiumin, the coffeehouse manager. He was a small man with cropped hair but a reputation for having a large, booming voice and a fiery temper. But as he walked towards Dr.Chen, he kind of looked like an excited little boy. Luhan and Sehun shared confused glances. Xiumin hardly ever smiled, especially not like he was doing now: chubby cheeks, glistening teeth, twinkling eyes ... and Dr. Chen smiled back with the same vigor. It was a scary sight to behold. 

"Xiumin! How nice to see you too. Long time no see ..." Dr. Chen's eyes scanned over the short man's figure, and his gaze seemed to linger on him a little longer than necessary.

"It really has been a long time" added Xiumin, as he came closer to the professor who hastily gave his best wishes to Baekhyun and suggested that he and Xiumin talk in private. 

As Baekhyun walked back to class, he couldn't quite shake the nerves that still had a hold of him. Not even the fact that Dr. Chen had possible romantic attachments with Xiumin in the past was interesting enough to get him out of this slump.

*

After Baekhyun's last class of the day, he walked hastily back to his apartment and ran into the one person he did not feel like seeing: Kyungsoo.

"Baekhyun hyung, there you are! I've been looking all over you!' He seemed to be breathless, and there a was a little sweat patch seeping through his polka-dotted polo from his chest. He had a large bag and handed it to Baekhyun. The smell of delicious food immediately hit Baekhyun's nose. His olfactory senses were pretty damn good (thanks to science) and he could detect the aroma of boiled rice, kimchi and pan-fried dumplings. 

"What's this for?" asked Baekhyun, gripping the bag tightly. 

"It's a, um ... congratulatory meal for your internship. You should eat it with Park Chanyeol this evening. There's more than enough for two people ... Um, Luhan told me about the internship even though I thought you would've been the one to tell me." 

Baekhyun poked him in response. He should have told his little brother at least but it just hadn't seemed important to tell him ... and it should have.

"I'm sorry. But thank you for this, Do-do." added the older boy awkwardly, feeling his hands perspire. 

"You're welcome, but thank Mom too. She helped make it and she misses you, you know?" said Kyungsoo, his eyes opening wider in some sort of anticpication.

"I really doubt that, Soo."

"No she does hyung! She-"

"Look, I appreciate this gift and all, but I really have to go." And with one last broken smile for his brother, Baekhyun walked away leaving Kyungsoo at a loss of words. Of course, he didn't mean to come off rude, but he wasn't going to stand around and listen to Kyungsoo's pathetic attempts at convincing him that his mother had forgiven him. She definitely hadn't and it didn't matter because he hadn't forgiven her.

And Kyungsoo knew that, but he continued to pretend he was clueless, perhaps it was how he coped with it all.

Nonetheless, Kyungsoo could do no wrong in mother's eyes. He came home on time, kept his room clean and didn't make too much noise.

It took one second to fall for Kyungsoo but an eternity for Baekhyun. 

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Okay wow. I'm sorry haven't updated in a while. For some reason this chapter was a pain to edit, although (you can probably tell) I neglected to edit the second half. I at life 

Anyway, many, many, many thanks to the readers, subscribers and commenters :D You guys have made my stress disappear and turned bad days into good ones. 

Thanks again to all of you. 

~electricsherlock