*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

Selina stopped before the wall surrounding the Tang house and turned around smiling. Taking a breath Selina stepped forward and came to a pause when Danson stepped out in front of her.

“Where were you just now?” Danson asked.

Selina’s mind went to a blank.

“Mom and dad are looking for you,” Danson said.

Selina took a breath of relief. It turned out Danson’s parents had wanted to take the whole family for a health check up. After hours of waiting and taking turns of going in they went out to eat afterward.

“Lets hope everyone gets good results,” Uncle Tang said.

“Eat up kids,” Aunt Tang told. “You haven’t been eating a lot lately, Fei. What’s wrong?”

“I’m eating now, aren’t I?” asked Fei without looking up from her plate of food.

“She should be fine,” Uncle Tang assured, “Selina, you don’t seem to be eating a lot.”

Selina looked up from her plate, “Oh…well, I just had a meal with a friend.”

“Was that why you didn’t answer my call?” asked Danson.

Before Selina could bother to answer Fei dropped down her chop sticks.

“Why do you only worry about Selina?” Fei asked. “Aren’t you worried about your blood daughter at all?”

“Fei,” Uncle Tang warned.

“You told us you were alright,” Aunt Tang pointed out.

Fei scooted her chair back and got up, “I’m full.”

“Fei, sit back down,” Uncle Tang demanded. “Don’t be throwing your tantrums here.”

“So if Selina complains you won’t mind and let her have it her way?” Fei asked. “Since I don’t count as a daughter, I want to leave first.”

“Just sit back down, Fei,” Danson whispered.

Fei sent Danson a glare and stomped out of the restaurant. Selina felt like sliding down her chair.

“That girl. Let her have it her way then,” Uncle Tang mumbled, “just continue your meal.”

Selina silently nodded and continued to stuff herself. After a few bites her cell phone started to ring. Selina quickly looked up and turned to Danson.

“Answer it,” told Danson.

Selina pulled out her cell phone and quietly answered it.

“You know who this is?” questioned Jiro on the other line.

Selina bit her lip, “Um…sure.”

“What do you mean by sure?” Jiro asked.

“Who is it?” Danson asked from beside her.

“Is someone there with you?” Jiro asked.

“Yea,” Selina hesitantly answered.

“Oh…you must be busy right now, right?” Jiro asked. “Hang up then.”

“But…” Selina began then closed her cell phone after she noticed that Jiro had hung up first.

“You must have a lot of friends,” Uncle Tang smiled.

Selina smiled uncertainly and returned to her food leaving Danson to wonder about who had called. That night Selina found herself pacing back and forth in front of the house waiting for Jiro to call back.

“What are you doing?” asked Danson opening the front door.

Selina quickly jumped alarmed and when she noticed it was Danson she gave out a laugh.

“You’re a little strange today. Is something the matter?” Danson stepped down the stairs.

Selina quickly shook her head no, “I’m ok…nothing’s wrong so you can go back in.”

Danson frowned as he stopped at the bottom of the steps, “Are you nervous about something?”

Selina laughed, “No! I’m just thinking.”

Danson made a face, “Alright then, I’ll leave you alone.”

Selina watched as Danson slowly made his way back in. Selina took her cell phone out of her pocket.

“Why aren’t you calling?” she questioned and tilted her head back.

Selina quickly turned around and looked at the door. Finally Selina realized how dumb she was. Danson was the answer to why she was so hesitant. If she admitted to being Jiro’s girlfriend, how would she be towards Danson? Selina lowered her cell phone into her pocket and headed toward the door.

The next day Selina felt her head lower as she passed Jiro in the hallway. She turned her head around to glance at him and quickly turned back following Danson to class. After class Selina waited for Jiro by the stairs as usual.

“Ignoring me now?” Jiro questioned as he ran toward her.

“Why are you so late?” Selina asked.

Jiro opened his mouth and took a breath, “Why are you always asking me a question after I ask you a question?”

“Am not,” Selina replied.

“You are too,” Jiro pushed.

“What are you complaining about?” Selina asked.

“Complaining?” Jiro repeated confused with her words.

“Oh really!” Selina said and walked off first.

“Hey wait!” Jiro shouted then started off after her.

He stopped beside her and threw his arm over her shoulder.

“Don’t get angry, my perfect lady,” Jiro said breathing into her ear.

Selina shrugged, “You’re giving me goosebumps, turd.”

“I know. Hey, lets go shopping,” Jiro suggested.

“What are you up to?” Selina asked.

Jiro smiled and quickly rushed Selina toward the open market. Selina followed and watched as Jiro picked out some fresh foods and snacks. Somehow Selina felt their roles were switched around because in the end she had ended up carrying the bags.

“Are you planning a banquet or what?” asked Selina stopping by the corner of the block.

Jiro stopped and turned around, “Exactly. This is what I call we can eat while we study.”

Selina rolled her eyes, “Why should I carry the bags?”

“I’m buying, aren’t I?” Jiro pointed out.

“Then what are those for?” Selina asked pointing to Jiro’s arms.

Jiro lifted his arm up and Selina could see his muscle bulge out, “To carry you.”

Selina laughed, “You’re such a joker.”

Jiro walked toward her and lowered himself to the ground so his back was facing her.

“What are you doing?” asked Selina.

“Hurry up,” Jiro said and when Selina didn’t respond he turned around. “Well obviously a girl would be tired of walking by now.”

Selina laughed and tilted her head up toward the wind.

“Hurry up!” Jiro shouted and reached back for her arm pulling her forward.

Selina gave a loud shout and stopped herself from falling onto him as she ed her arm out against his back.

“Are you stupid?” asked Selina.

“Why are you bickering with me?” Jiro teased. “You’re tired aren’t you, honey?”

Selina made a face and slapped his back. Jiro shouted aloud in pain and looked back at her. Selina smiled and got onto his back.

“Get up now,” Selina ordered.

Jiro couldn’t help but smile and got up to his feet ignoring everyone else’s eyes. He picked up their bags and handed them to Selina.

“You can hold onto these if I’m carrying you, right?” Jiro questioned.

“Oh you’re really lazy aren’t, you?” Selina stated.

“See, there you’re doing it again! You’re always putting your sentences into question statements,” Jiro whined.

“Shut up, ok? We’re getting stares because you’re loud,” Selina hissed.

Jiro turned toward her and smiled, “They’re just envious.”

Selina smiled back and leaned into Jiro more as she tightened her arm around him.

“We’re home!” Jiro shouted as he walked into the house.

“Don’t you think I can get down now?” asked Selina.

“Where did you go?” Mrs. Wang questioned walking into the hallway.

Selina’s eyes went wide and she slid off Jiro’s back. As her feet landed on the ground she quickly greeted his mom.

“What’s this?” asked Mrs. Wang.

“We just bought some snacks,” Jiro told.

“We’re going to do homework now,” Selina said and quickly headed up the steps.

Jiro smiled at his mother and followed Selina up. When Jiro entered the study room he quickly jumped into his seat and grabbed one of the bags.

“Just what I wanted!” he exclaimed as he took out a bag of chips.

“School’s out soon, aren’t you glad?” asked Selina.

“I’m more than glad,” Jiro replied stuffing himself. “Besides, we’re graduating.”

“That just means no more tutoring. Aren’t you sad, Jiro Wang,” Selina said opening a can of orange juice.

Jiro shrugged, “After I kick Joanne out, I’ll hire you to clean the house.”

Selina let out a loud laugh, “That’s seriously mean, besides I have plans for after graduation.”

“Like what?” asked Jiro.

“Aren’t you going to college?” asked Selina.

“Me?” Jiro pointed to himself. “I never thought about it.”

“I should’ve known,” Selina mumbled to herself. “Well anyways I don’t plan to live with the Tangs forever.”

Jiro suddenly slammed the table with the palms of his hands, “Oh yea! You shouldn’t stay with them too long either.”

“You’re just repeating the general idea of what I just said,” Selina pointed out. “Whatever. You just better pass those end of the year exams.”

“I won’t worry about it when you’re here.” Jiro flashed Selina a childish smile.

The following week Selina spent everyday after school with Jiro. They studied, went out, or more just like spent time together. Exams finally came the following week.

“Are you busy?” Danson asked after chasing Selina down the hallway.

Their graduation ceremony would be tomorrow and Danson wanted to do something with Selina before then. He hadn’t had the time to do so before because he had things to do with his friends and Selina was always with Jiro.

“Not right now,” Selina replied looking back at him. “Is something wrong?”

“No…but can we have a meal together? I mean just for the two of us?” asked Danson.

Selina was silent then replied, “Sure, why not?”

Selina found herself sitting across Danson with a bowl of soup and noodles sitting in front of her. It looked tasty and seemed good, but she just didn’t have the urge to eat it. She felt sorry, but recently she’d gotten used to having Jiro at every meal. Finding that it would make Danson feel bad she stuffed herself without thinking any further.

“Are you still rethinking your promise?” Danson asked.

Selina swallowed her noodles and suddenly started coughing.

“Are you ok?” Danson asked worriedly as he grabbed her some napkins and handed her a glass of water.

Selina took them from him and nodded as she gulped down the water.

“Sorry,” Selina apologized gently hitting her chest.

“I think you ate too fast,” Danson said then added, “sorry, maybe I said that at the wrong time.”

Selina shook her head, “It’s ok…I’m still a little confused right now so…just a little more time, ok?”

Danson nodded and looked at his bowl of soup then returned to look at Selina.

“Are you and Jiro dating?” he suddenly asked.

Selina’s eyes went wide and she stared back into Danson’s lonely eyes. What was she supposed to say? She’d felt bad about telling a lie. Truthfully she hadn’t been thinking about Danson at all. Ever since Jiro’s parents had come back to stay for a while she’d been occupied with only Jiro. She and Jiro were officially dating, it was just she hadn’t said a word to anyone.

Selina swallowed, “N…no. That’s silly, I wouldn’t do such a thing.”

“I hope you mean it,” Danson replied.

Selina returned to her food and found herself thinking maybe Danson had already noticed. Besides, which girl would hang out with a guy like Jiro so much if there wasn’t anything going on between them?

Selina waved back at Danson before he turned to walk away. Selina took a breath and headed for the mart to buy something before heading to Jiro’s.

The next day Selina and Danson awoke early and headed to school. After the ceremony rehearsal followed a lunch for the seniors. An hour after that parents and families started filling the school gym. As the school principal gave his long speech Selina searched through the rows of seats of all the students hoping to get a glimpse of Jiro, but to her avail she couldn’t find him. She sunk in her chair and listened to the quiet chattering of those sitting around her.

‘If a light appeared over me and my parents appeared it’d be the happiest moment of my life.’

“Congrats!” Aunt Tang congratulated as they walked into the Tang household.

“We’re so proud of you both!” said Uncle Tang smiling broadly.

“Thanks mom and dad,” Danson thanked smiling the same smile.

Selina watched as the three of them smiled at each other and suddenly felt a little lonely. She couldn’t help but feel like an intruder who had suddenly barged into this happy family and threw everything out of place.

“Selina?” Aunt Tang called breaking into her thoughts.

“Huh?” Selina turned to her.

“We have something Danson’s father and I would like to tell you,” Aunt Tang told.

Selina pressed her lips together, “Can we talk after I come back? I have to go somewhere first.”

“Sure,” Uncle Tang said.

Selina nodded and ignored their eyes as she walked out. She slowed to a stop while stood in front of Jiro’s house.

“Wahh!” Jiro shouted as he suddenly grabbed Selina’s shoulders pushing her forward.

Selina gave a shriek and turned around to see Jiro smiling back at her.

“You jerk,” Selina mumbled.

“You look flustered,” Jiro told, “shouldn’t you be happy?”

Selina didn’t answer and headed inside.

“It’s just you and me now. My parents headed back to Paris,” Jiro said linking his arm around her neck.

“Aren’t you going to be lonely?” Selina asked.

Jiro smiled, “But you’re around so there’s no need to be. Go have a seat first, I’ll get some water.”

Selina watched as Jiro ran off and sat on the couch in the living room. Selina sighed and leaned back into the cushion.

“Did something bad happen?” asked Jiro as he set down the two cups.

“I didn’t say anything was wrong,” Selina pointed out.

“But you’ve been sighing continuously,” Jiro told and then mimicked her.

Selina made a face and slapped at his hands, “Well, it’s just because.”

Selina bit her lip and decided she didn’t know how to talk to Jiro about it. So in order to avoid his questions she quickly gave him a kiss.

Selina pulled on a smile, “I just wanted to kiss you.”

“So you were sighing?” asked Jiro then laughed. “It’s not so hard to kiss me.”

Jiro leaned in and gave Selina a long kiss. A smile crawled across his lips as Selina wrapped both her arms around his neck. Before Jiro realized it he was already laying on her. Selina had already forgotten how they had started this and she had already forgotten her troubled feelings. All that was in her mind was Jiro and she didn’t want to be pulled out of his arms. Right after her thoughts passed by her cell phone started ringing. Selina looked at Jiro and took her cell phone out of her pocket.

 

“Oh…ok,” was all Selina said and then hung up.

Selina put her cell phone back into her pocket and guiltily looked at Jiro.

“I have to go back,” Selina said sitting up.

“But I’m still in the mood,” Jiro whined.

Selina smiled and gave him a peck on the cheek.

“Bye,” Selina told and hesitantly left his house.

Selina fiddled with her hands as she stepped back into the Tang household. She found Danson and his parents sitting by the couch and guessed Fei must have gone to sleep already.

“Come over here, Selina,” Aunt Tang waved her over patting the empty seat next to her.

Selina went over silently and sat down.

“Your mother isn’t actually my blood sister Selina,” Uncle Tang told, “my father adopted her because my mother wasn’t able to give birth anymore. But I hope you know that I will treat you as my own daughter.”

Selina felt the words travel through her ears but she felt no emotion erupt within her. Uncle Tang glanced at his wife and then at Danson then returned back to Selina.

“Your mother and I have made an agreement when you were still young,” Uncle Tang went on, “we’ve decided that when you and Danson are already grown up we’d engage you two…but now your mother isn’t here so I don’t feel right making this decision alone. I know Danson has feelings for you, but I won’t force it if you don’t like him.”

Selina felt her breath shorten and her chest began to hurt again. She couldn’t believe what she was now hearing. Engagement?

“If you agree, then we’ll announce it at your graduation party this weekend,” Mrs. Tang put in her extra words.

Selina looked at them unable to believe what she was hearing. Though if she thought of it on the other hand it would be a reasonable way to pay them back. Since her parents had passed away no one other than them had taken care of her and made sure she’d had what she needed. Thinking of it now, she’d lived with them for quite a long time already.

Selina opened and hesitantly spoke, “I…I’ll seriously think about it. I’ll try to give you my answer before then.”

“Take your time. You must be tired after today, so go to sleep soon,” Uncle Tang nodded.

Selina watched as Danson’s parents left, but she didn’t dare to look at Danson. She knew that he must be feeling happy for such a thing to occur and she didn’t know whether to be angry or joyful. Before Danson could speak to her Selina quickly left the room. Selina closed the door to her room and put her hands on her head. She couldn’t explain it but she felt frustrated and even more lost than usual. The door opened and Selina quickly twisted herself around.

“Can I come in?” asked Fei.

“Oh…yea…sure,” Selina told.

Fei walked in closing the door behind her.

“I…can I ask something of you?” Fei asked.

This time looking at her Selina found Fei looking fragile. As if one touch could make her shatter into many pieces.

“This weekend at the graduation party…could you…could you invite Jiro?” asked Fei.

Selina knew her eyes had widened in surprise.

“I know…you two have been going out…but I really want to see him…please?” Fei asked sounding weak.

Selina bit her lip, “Ok.”

Fei smiled and took Selina’s hands, “Thank you so much! Thanks!”

As the door closed Selina dropped onto her bed covering her head with her pillow. Selina finally questioned herself for the first time if she would be brave enough to love Jiro.

The sun was shining through the window, the morning birds were already chirping, and the laughter of children outside were not avoidable. However Selina lay awake in bed refusing to get up.

“What is wrong with me?” Selina asked herself. “Why am I being like this? It’s only a yes or a no to the engagement, yet it’s the only thing I can really complete to make mother happy. It’s the only thing left on earth for me to do for them.”

Selina gazed at the ceiling for another half hour until there was a knock at her door. Once the door opened Selina pulled herself to sit up.

“Are you sick?” asked Aunt Tang as she sat down by Selina’s side.

Selina let her loose hair fall forward half blocking her face and she was glad it did. Selina stared down at the blanket in silence.

“It’s almost 1 now, why don’t you get up to get something to eat? Your uncle and I will be out today,” Aunt Tang said.

Selina nodded and listened as the door closed. Only then did she raise her head. Selina closed her eyes and sighed. How was she supposed to answer them? She really didn’t want the engagement…but how would she repay them for being so kind to her and taking her in?

“Or am I just being stupid?” Selina asked herself.

After washing up Selina decided maybe she would go out for a walk or visit Jiro or do something. As she walked passed the kitchen Danson called her. Selina came to a pause and turned around.

“Do you want to help me?” Danson asked.

“What are you doing?” Selina asked not moving from her spot.

“Baking cookies,” Danson replied.

Selina glanced toward the door then walked toward Danson.

“You always make it from scratch,” Selina told looking at all the bowls on the table.

“Of course,” Danson told, “doing everything with my own hands and putting all my effort into it and getting a satisfying result makes me happy.”

“You’re really simple,” Selina complimented.

“You aren’t?” asked Danson.

Selina looked away and pressed her lips together choosing to ignore his question. Selina helped Danson prepare the ingredients and baked the cookies. When the cookies were done Selina realized she was hungry.

“Go on and eat some,” Danson urged placing the cookies onto a plate for Selina. “Do you want some milk?”

“Sure.” 

As Selina chowed down on the cookies she hadn’t noticed that Danson had been closely watching her the whole time. He took a seat besides her. He was silent for a few minutes.

“I was a little happy, but more like sad,” Danson began.

Selina slowly stopped eating her cookie and looked down at her plate moodily.

“I don’t mind spending the rest of my life with you…but I know that you might not feel the same way,” Danson began, “if they want to engage us, it’s fine with me. But I was disappointed at why they finally speak about this now. They shouldn’t have made any decisions without your consent at least.”

“What’s he saying? I don’t get where he’s going,” Selina thought to herself.

“I’m sorry if it sounds like we’re pushing you, but you don’t need to force yourself,” Danson continued, “don’t, ok? I know you haven’t been thinking about reconsidering our childhood thing, but I’m ok with it too.”

“Why are you saying that?” Selina asked jokingly.

“Because I know you will. I know you’ll force yourself,” Danson said and as he did so Selina’s smile dropped. “Don’t do it. If I can’t make you love me with all my effort, at least I’ll be glad I tried no matter what the outcome. So don’t force yourself.”

Selina finally managed to stare into his deep eyes. Selina finally began to think how selfish she had been acting toward him. Avoiding him because she hadn’t wanted to think about her childish promise to him. Truthfully, she was the one being childish. Danson did care for her with all his heart…his feelings were real.

“I’ll go out for a walk then,” Selina said and got up.

Selina could feel the warm breeze of the day but it didn’t make her feel better anyhow even if she was breathing fresh air. Danson was being too nice it was making her feel bad. Her heart was becoming heavy in such a short time. Selina stopped in front of Jiro’s house. He would be able to make her forget her worries, but she knew she couldn’t run forever.

“Selina! I’m so glad to see you’re visiting so often!” Joanne greeted.

Selina smiled, “Where can I find Jiro?”

“Oh Jiro? He’s upstairs in his room,” Joanne responded.

“Thanks,” Selina said before making a move upstairs.

She found Jiro sleeping on the couch in the study room in a sitting position. His head was resting against his fist. A bright smile erupted on her face as she walked over. Selina sat down next to him curling against him.

“Thank God I met you,” Selina said leaning against his shoulder. “You know if you could throw a dumb joke or something right now I swear I’ll never leave you.”

Silence followed.

“Hmm? You’re not giving me joke? Why not?” Selina asked. “Aww…don’t be such a poor sport. Just one, ok? I guess you’re not in the mood then…then I can’t also promise to always be your girlfriend from now on.”

Selina sat in silence listening to the rhythm of Jiro’s breathing. Suddenly Jiro’s hand slipped off the sofa jerking him forward. Jiro fell halfway off the side of the couch.

“Whoa…whoa…whoa!” he screamed.

Selina gave a slight shriek as she fell forward along with him. Jiro made a face and pushed himself back. He glanced at Selina and his face became blank.

“What are you doing here?” he asked awake.

“You don’t like me being here?” asked Selina.

“No, no that’s not what I meant,” Jiro quickly fixed his sentence then scratched his head, “I was dreaming and then I heard your voice.”

Jiro turned so that he was facing Selina.

“Is something wrong?” he asked.

“Nothing,” Selina lied smiling. “Can you hug me for a moment?”

“Hug you? Something is definitely up…you’ve never asked me this before,” Jiro eyed her.

“Hurry up,” Selina urged.

Jiro smiled and extended his arms out pulling her to his chest.

“I’m telling you I’m sure something’s up,” Jiro was suspicious, “you’ve been a little strange since yesterday. But I won’t force you to tell me so you have to tell me when you’re completely ready, ok?”

Jiro felt Selina nod her head against his chest.

“You’re so cute like this,” Jiro said smiling, “if I could hold you like this forever, I’d die happy. Rock a bye baby on the tree trunk…”

Selina felt like laughing at him for singing such an old mother goose song, but the laugh didn’t come out. Selina put her arm around his waist and clutched onto him tightly recording this moment into her memory.