Ren's POV

 

I awake in my room, the one I came to hate. Of course, what was I thinking? A small part of me had hoped that once I escape the

darkness of my dreams, I'd wake up on a sofa, dim light surrounding me- a familiar light. Every single day, I had hoped, no, wished to

wake up in his arms. For the whole month after meeting Helena, I've been feeling empty.

 

 I find myself lying on my bed, cold and white, matching into the sterile room perfectly. The first thing my eyes discover is the artificial

eye watching me from the upper corner of the room, obviously a camera. So I decide to not to make a move, pretending to be asleep

as long as possible, so I can sort out my thoughts before they arrive to check on me- too late. Even though I don't hear the door creek

open, I feel their auras approaching me as they enter. I don't dislike them yet I don't want to see them. Maybe I'm blaming them for what

happened. Maybe I should, maybe I shouldn't. But they are responsible, right? I continue my act, hoping they'll leave upon seeing me

asleep, but I should've known better; they aren't stupid, and they know me well.

 

"We already apologized so we won't even try again. It wouldn't change anything anyway." It's Yongguk speaking, I recognize his deep

voice instantly. The message surprises me though. They can't have come just to tell me that? All the other days, they'd take turns in

looking after me, trying hopelessly to communicate with me, talking about boring, normal things, but I blocked all their tries.  This time

feels different. Who is accompanying Yongguk anyway? Since they already saw through me, I flash my eyes open and sit straight. I

have nothing to tell them, so I wait till they continue without minding my non-existent reply. However, none of them moves, we merely

keep avoiding each other's glances in a never ending game, unable to start a conversation. Plus, just like me, they know that we're

being watched, so they need to watch their tongues.

 

"Aish, what to say- this could be troublesome." Youngjae warily glances at the camera, his eyes telling me: Can you do something

about it? It's not about whether I can or not, but about me wanting to do something. I haven't used any of my powers for a long time, if

you exclude the aura reading, but it's not like I can switch it off just like that. Eventually, curiosity takes over. I nod, closing my eyes,

concentrating on the annoying thing in the corner to keep it from functioning- their amazed reactions tell me that it must've worked.

The lamp blinks red now, the camera stopped filming. Relieved sighs can be heard from all sides.

 

"We probably need to make it short, they'll come soon to fix the 'error'." Yongguk has taken over talking again, he has a serious and

determined expression on his face- and somehow I figure he has a plan. A risky one. To help me...?

 

"Ren-ah, we plan on getting you out of here." His words don't leave any impact on me. Get out? That'd be nice, but I went through that

once already, and I don't intend to do so a second time. Even more so because I know what living alone means, and I know exactly and

horribly clearly that there's no place I can return to. Even if I did, it wouldn't work out. He didn't want me anymore. I don't believe he'd

change his mind.

 

"Yah, why such a unhappy expression? We try to make up for what we've done and you're being like that.  But I expected that much." A

smile creeps on Youngjae's face as he speaks. "To bring back your old self, we just have to prove you that JR is still in love with you,

right?" Hearing his name hurts. My heart hasn't given up on my first love. I can't take it.

 

"Don't act as if you know! He threw me away, no way he'd pick me up again!" I shout at them, voice hoarse, now regretting that I made

way for them to tell me their plan. This won't work out, never.

 

"He didn't throw you away, he was desperate. And I'm sure he's hurting as much as you do." Jongup's quiet voice fills the room and its

effect doesn't fail to calm me down a bit. His hyungs give him warning glares, as if he blurted out what he wasn't supposed to say.

Jongup falls into silence, and I don't know what to believe anymore. Yongguk sighs.

 

"Just wait and endure it a bit longer, we'll prove you wrong. Zelo's already on it." Only now I notice the absence of the bubbly maknae.

 

 

 

***
 

 

 

JR's POV

 

I believed time could heal any wound. Apparently, that isn't always the case. After one month, I'm still not over him. One long month

spent in loneliness, despite my friends desperate tries to support me when- and however they can. The only thing I want is the ability to

let go.

 

You may be over me, but I’m not over you
 

How can I forget you that easily? It’s still really hard
 

Even if a long time passed
 

The reality was just the same
 

We used to be one – I want you back.

 

 

I answer the phone quickly so that I don't need to listen to the hurtful lyrics of the song playing.

 

"Hello?" The person on the other end doesn't  immediately answer, instead I hear some weird noises. Footsteps, maybe?

 

"Is that Kim Jonghyun?" I can't tell who it is from hearing his voice, so I'm probably not very close with the caller. Normally, I'd hung up

by now. But he knew my name, and my real one at that. Isn't that suspicious? I have a slight idea on who this may be, and I hope I'm

wrong.

 

"Yes. That's me." A relieved sigh on the other end of the line.

 

"It's Zelo speaking, and we need to talk." Zelo, huh? Never heard of him before, or maybe I forgot... For some reason the picture of a

blond, curly haired boy comes to my mind. Nah, that's impossible, isn't it?

 

"Talk? Why?" I wonder why I even keep chatting with that Zelo guy. Wasn't he the one that made me find out about Ren's past? There's

no reason to see him again.

 

"It's about Ren." Zelo says, and just like that, in the blink of an eye, there is a reason. I still can't tell if this is good or bad. Did

something happen to him?

 

"How is he??" I blurt out, needing to know.

 

"Uh- He's fine. Physically." I need a while to grasp the meaning behind that.

 

"What do you mean, just physically?"

 

"He's a bit... Because of you..." Zelo doesn't finish the sentence.

 

"Because of me, what?!" Silence. Then, one single demand.

 

"Come meet me, you'll know where." I want to shout at him, how should I know by myself? But he already ended the call and left me

with the decision to make. Though it's not really a hard one. I grab my jacket and prepare to go outside out of my own free will for the

first time in a month.

 

***

 

Finding him isn't as hard as I feared it to be. My intuition led me to the bus stop, destination: the beach. The one Ren told me about

when he expressed his sorrows. And here I am, approaching the lone figure ahead of me. Before I can grow any more nervous, I

address him coldly.

 

"I'm here, so tell me what you know." Unconsciously, I chose the tone I used to use when threatening an enemy. The seemingly

younger boy flinches upon it's fierceness, but he isn't as intimidated as I expected him to be.

 

"If you ask in a friendlier way, I'll tell you, hyung." He beams at me, and I give him a glare that makes him talk anyway. "Ah, don't be like

that. It was a joke." His soft face turns serious. "Ren is in a state I can't really describe. He doesn't listen to us at all and won't even try

to escape though we offered him our help-"

 

"Escape? So he's caught?" I cut him off, a feeling of fear bubbles up and I try to suppress it.

 

"I wouldn't call it that since he went there voluntarily. But we believe that as long as he's in there, his state won't change."

"Then why don't you just get him out?" I ask, I really don't get what's the problem, if they can, why don't they...?

 

"That's the point where you become involved." Zelo kicks the sand with his foot, looking down onto the ground. He seems a bit angry,

maybe because he's at a loss. I wait for him to go on. "The reason why Ren went there voluntarily- you. The reason why he's like he is

right now- you. The reason why he won't escape- you." Now he looks up at me, hope glimmering in his eyes.

 

"You seem to forget one thing. I'm nothing to Ren, not anymore." I state calmly, but admitting it hurts nevertheless. Zelo quietly shakes

his head.

 

"You're wrong. Ren loves you very, very much."

 

 

 

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To all of you who are still with me after those 32 chapters. I thank you for bearing with me and my slow updates T_T It's not like I don't try, but  writing

this is such a struggle at the moment. I'm determined to complete this though, and I will.

I just don't know how long it'll take me... At least we draw near the end :)

 

So yeah. BAP tries to make up for everything. Will they succeed? And will Jren get back together? xD

You'll see soon enough~  ♥