AN: First thank you to those who have subscribed and commented... 

This update is dedicated to all of you... especially to ... xanderlee, Ashertua , and LightSchwarz....

Apparently, this is the continuation of Chapter Two....

Sorry for all the typos and errors...

Hope you will enjoy this chapter...

=========================================================================================================================

Action speaks louder than words. I did try to show him in small ways that I cared but my actions were too small for him to notice.

My first and last love… Well, he did not know I loved him. He just confessed to me and eventually we became a couple. The other members were afraid that our relationship would be destructive to the both of us and to our career. They thought that I was not prepared to love again and even for our entire relationship, I haven’t said the magic words of love to him. It was like a one-sided love. That, he was like the only one that has cherished our relationship. I do love him, I love him more than any other things but I couldn’t say those words to him. It was not pride that prevented me from telling him, but rather the lack of necessity. He seemed content and fulfilled at the moment. Since Riku had come to live with us, he focused most of his unlimited energy on him.

"Can you help me tie my shoes?" I looked down to see our adopted son staring at me with his big innocent eyes.

"Riku, why don't you ask Jongie?" even though I was already kneeling on the floor to help him out.

"Because eomma tied my shoelace but it is untidy. I don’t like it."

I rolled my eyes at that. Riku was supposed to be helpless but Jongie was just helpless, sometimes… But they were my brats, no, my brat and my diva for Jongie’s case.

"When I am 12, I will buy a beach house."

That was random. "Why a beach house?"

"Because by the sea, you can go swimming often."

That made no sense. "Why 12?"

"Because I will be all grown up and I can take care of you and eomma. Uncle Yeollie says that eomma needs a lot of care and that you don't know how to take care of yourself. So, you probably …"

"I got it!" I said while gracefully muting the sound by covering the 6-year-old's mouth. "When you see Uncle Yeollie today, tell him I will be glad to hear what taking care of Sungjong means."

The chuckling sound in the back indicated that 'Eomma' had heard everything. How mortifying. Sometimes the thought of Sungyeol knowing more about our maknae than me awakened an uncontrollable jealousy. I had become an expert in burying those insecurities for fear that Sungjong would catch on to me. Deep down I knew that Jongie understood, but he was too decent of a man to bring the subject up.

"Let's go. Riku, don't forget your drawing sets. Jongie, what are you bringing? That won't fit in my car." My eyes almost popped out of its sockets when I saw Sungjong carrying a gigantic white teddy bear. Trust him and his weird es for dolls.

"It's Youngwook-hyung's present, a giant teddy. And yes it will."

What had I committed myself to? Going to our CEO's house for a late Christmas party meant having to deal with our equally moronic and crazy hyungs. Even we are still an idol group, we lived separately or let’s just say with our lovers. Me and Jongie, Sunggyu-hyung and Woohyun-hyung, Dongwoo-hyung and Hoya-hyung, and our choding, I mean Sungyeol-hung who was living by himself. I didn't know how I had gotten stuck into this mess in the first place. I just want to stay at our apartment, to snuggle with Jongie and to get a well-deserved sleep. I love sleeping but I love Jongie the most. To top it all off, the hope for a quiet ride quickly vanished as I saw Riku handing to Sungjong the latest INFINITE CD. Living as a musician, noise had become our eternal friend.

Pulling in our CEO's driveway, I gave my last warning: No destroying, no whining, and no drinking. That last one was of course for the diva, the one for which the words 'tolerance' and 'alcohol' would never co-exist. Bouncing happily out of the car, the both of them were engulfed by the mansion, passing by our CEO armed with, in one hand, a giant cane, and a red bag on the other. He looked like Santa Claus. Migraine, migraine, here you come!

"L, how nice to see you today. What brings you here?" Woohyun-hyung said smiling coyly as he hugged me and escorted me inside the mansion.

"You know damn well why I am here, hyung."

"I see you are in a good mood. Was the ride on the way here too long?" Sunggyu-hyung asked as he approached Woohyun-hyung and gave him a backhug. It was still early for them to be that mushy.

I did not answer and marched into the house like there was no tomorrow. There was a long weekend ahead of us and it was better to save my energy than to end up in meaningless arguments.

Everyone was here, from our managers, stylists, producers and the other staffs. Avoiding people was not going to be an option and if Dongwoo-hyung's current death grip on my arm was anything to go by, him and his habit of appearing anywhere, our Woollim family was going to take this opportunity to get closer to each other.

"Who do you think should sit here?" he asked as he scanned each place around the table thoughtfully, while strategically placing name tags and removing others. He and Hoya-hyung were given the task on preparing the dining hall tonight. But Hoya-hyung was missing for the moment that’s why Dongwoo-hyung was bugging me.

"How would I know?" Either he had officially lost it or he was worried about where I would sit. Even I could say that I have moved on from the fiasco I have encountered before I still isolate myself from others. I would only interact with our CEO, our managers and other INFINITE members, and of course to my lover and our son. Jongie always fit anywhere he went, blissfully oblivious of any contemptuous look directed at him. People were drawn to his innocence. Our hyungs often joked that Jongie was kind-hearted enough to make friends with even ghosts.On one hand, INFINITE was not per se against our relationship, but they were weary of Sungjong's mood swings which religiously followed the trends of our fights. On the other hand, my family accepted my lover but they were still suspicious of the potential negative effect his influence could have on my health and mentality. With this annoying thought in my head, I dismissed Dongwoo-hyung to go on the porch hoping to find peace.

"Have you seen the indoor pool yet?" I turned to Sungjong. "It was still under construction when we came last. But now, it looks really nice. The security doors cannot close though. So we have to watch out for Riku. I promised him we will go swimming later as long as he stays away for now." Sungjong playfully brushed some imaginary dust off my jacket. I guess it was his way to get his physical contact of the day. Sleeping at our CEO’s house brought about a startling change in him that could be summed up in two words: No . The typically extremely pleasing singer went in hibernation mode without a second thought when we are in our boss' house. His fear of our CEO or his like shyness was both plausible culprits but he refused to talk about it and I did not pry.

A loud "dinner time!" resonated throughout the house prompting Sungjong to head towards the living room. I don't know what overtook me at that moment but I grabbed his hand, turned him around, and kissed him almost desperately. He never had the time to close his eyes but his instantaneous pink tint on his pale cheeks reassured me that even though nothing may happen tonight, he still desired me.

Dinner was rather uneventful. The third successful year of INFINITE was toasted with champagne. Apparently, our sales have been booming this year and our popularity were expanding continuously, which made our already giddy group even giddier. I, myself was happy of our achievement this past few years but I try to conceal it. While my lover and the other members were talking I amused myself by watching over Riku threatening Woogyu’s daughter with two chocolaty hands for the better part of the evening. When Sunggyu-hyung and Woohyun-hyung learnt that Sungjong and I were planning to adopt a child, they also planned to have a child for themselves. We thought that they were going to adopt a child but they came up with a different method on how to have a child. Luckily that time, Sunggyu-hyung’s close friend volunteered to be a surrogate mom stating that she owed the Woogyu couple something big and that was the only way she could pay. Through IVF, Hyejin was brought into this world. Both Riku and Hyejin were hidden from the public and were planning to reveal them to our fans when the right time arrives. The rest of us didn’t know which they used but I assumed that it was Sunggyu’s.   Even though the little girl was only two, she usually bossed Riku around much like Sunggyu-hyung bossing Sungjong. She definitely took after the great Kim Sunggyu. But, today Riku had the upper hand and ended up frightening the little girl so much that she took cover under the dining table. Innocent Riku was going to follow suit when a giggling Sungjong saved the day by forcefully taking him to the bathroom to clean up.

"They are cute, aren't they? And Sungjong acts very mature with him"

I had to laugh at that. "Sungyeol-hung, there is a big difference between seeming and being. But, yes they teach other a lot." I said sarcastically.

"I guess Sungjong will never learn maturity from you."

I didn't answer. There was no need. Honestly, despite of all the fanservice and skinship that we have and being known as Myungyeol couple to our fans, Sungyeol-hyung was one of the members that I could hardly get along with but we respect each other for the sake of INFINITE. Sunggyu, Woohyun, Hoya, our CEO  and our managers  joined in the conversation to be only interrupted by Sungjong and Dongwoo-hyung's weird antics with the plush toy Jongie had managed to bring in my car. Wait… Sungjong. Where was Riku? I quickly scanned the room.

"Jongie, have you seen Riku?"

"No, I haven't seen him since…the bathroom…" His pensive look turned into sheer panic and he ran to the back of the house towards the indoor pool. No, No, No… I followed him only to be stopped in my tracks by the horrifying scene. A small body was floating face down in the swimming pool. Without a second thought, I jumped in to get Riku out of the water and I started CPR.

1 2 3 Breath 1 2 3 Breath 1 2 3 Breath 1 2 3 Breath 1 2 3 Breath 1 2 3…

I glanced at Sungjong who had not moved from the stopping point of his frantic run, but I didn't like what I saw. He seems to be on the edge of breakdown and all I could see in his face was guilt, no other emotions, not even traces of tears. Jungryul-hyung was holding him tightly. Desperately, I returned to bringing Riku back to life. Come on, Riku! Breath! I pushed on his little chest. 1 2 3. Maybe during normal times, I would have been scared of breaking him or applying too much force, but this was not a normal time. He was ghostly pale and nothing seemed to be working. I heard one of our managers on the phone with the ambulance dispatcher. And the sound of sobbing from the other members also filled my ears but I couldn’t hear the distinct sound of sobbing from my lover. When did he get there? No, when did they get there?

1 2 3 Breath 1 2 3 Breath 1 2 3 Breath 1 2 3 Breath 1 2 3 Breath 1 2 3…

Happiness never lasts… When I am 12, I will buy a beach house

=========================================================================================================================