Sinb POV 

The word heartbreak doesn't have an exact definition because we can't express the physical pain we are going through. I tried to understand how a person can act so depressed after ending things with their partner and even though I have read many things regarding towards it, I couldn't really get the meaning behind the word. Until I had to experience it first-hand. 

On books they explain what a person suffers through a heartbreak, it falls short on how it really is.

Heartbreak has 4 stages and even though I thought they were ridiculous, I passed through three of them without realizing. 

Denial: The first day after the breakup, I didn't want to believe what she did. I wanted to pretend that it was just a weird nightmare and I hadn't woken up. That I couldn't believe she was capable on doing that; she is a ray of sunshine, always so sweet to any person she encounters, an angel walking on earth. I was about to call her, to hear her voice but whenever I tried to reach out for my phone, Sowon appeared out of nowhere and snatched from me. I begged her to give me the phone so I can just hear her voice but she didn't give in. In the end, she kept my phone until she was sure I didn't try and talk to her. Some times I wanted to go to her apartment and say that I'm sorry for telling her those things but Sowon stopped me every time I tried to sneak out. I wanted to bow down and apologize to her even though I didn't did anything wrong but I was in too much pain that I couldn't bear to be away from her. I was anxious about everything. 

Anger: I went into this stage four days after we broke up. I asked myself what? What did I have to do to deserve all of this? Who does she think she is for treating me like that? I got my pride back and I even went out to the mall to buy some things but I was angry at everything, at the people, at kids, and most of all at couples. I even throwed into the hallway Eunha clothes because they were laying on the living room. She didn't raise her voice or she didn't fight me back after I told her that she from being a friend, she instead hugged me even after I tried my best to get away from it. In the end, I drowned in her embrace and cried. I think it was the first time I had cried since that day. 

Sadness: After I had cried in Eunha embrace, I hadn't stopped crying since then. I realized that it was truly over, that it really happened. That she really just used me, that she pretended that I was a lab rat so she could see that I was human after all. I had barely eaten and I had barely slept. I was heartbroken after all. 

One week passed since the breakup and the only thing that was left on the four stages of a heartbreak was acceptance. I was afraid, that if I accept that we are finally over and that I don't want to do anything with her and that was what scarred me. 

On that day, I think Sowon had enough of my depressed state because she dragged me to the mall and to a salon. She told me that a better way to try and forget what happened is occupying your mind with different activities but since we are on vacation, she said that I was going to have a makeover. I didn't refuse when she was telling the hairdresser what she wanted to do to me and when they started to change my 'image'. 

In the end I was surprised when the hairdresser finished. She added extensions on my hair with silver on the tips. I looked different with long hair. The hairdresser said that I looked good and even Sowon was somewhat amazed at how it looked on me. 

"Unnie, it's only some extensions and they had colored the tips with silver," I said as she stared at me with a unbelievable look. "It's nothing from the new world." 

"You look really pretty. Now wait here, since I want to do something to myself," she said as she forced me to sit down and she gave me a magazine. 

After for about what it felt an hour she was walking towards me with a new hair color. 

"Why did you change your color to red? Are you and Eunha over?" I asked her as I furrowed my eyebrows. 

"What? Can't I have a change of image too? And no, we aren't over at all," she said as we got out of the salon.

"It suits you," I said with a tiny smile. 

"There it is. God do you know how worried I was since you have been weeping the last few days? I thought I wouldn't see that beautiful smile of yours," she said startling me with her there it is. I stared at her confusedly and she just smiled. "Oh come on, it's almost Christmas and I can't have you all depressed in this holiday. Come on, smile. Be happy." 

"Oh wow, I didn't know that that's all I needed to be happy again. Thank you Sowon for telling me the magic word," I said and she rolled her eyes. 

"Aish. You ungrateful kid, come back here," she yelled and I laughed as she began chasing me. 

Maybe I can't recover and be happy soon but step by step I can. And well, who knows that maybe in the future I can risk everything and fall in love again.

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So. Chapter 10 is up! I had to rewrite this chapter like four times because I didn't know how I to convey the feelings about a heartbreak. So that is why the late update. But I have like a little surprise that maybe I will give it to you later today or tomorrow. Who knows? Anyways, thank you for the comments and suscribes and even upvotes of the story it means a lot to me. 

This following chapters are going to be sad but don't worry it will get better later. Anyways, I love you all so much, 

-Lu