I walked out of the room with my nose bleeding. Never did I mean to hit him that hard. Let alone at all. But her brought her up. That was what really got me. I never wanted to have to remember her. She was the reason I couldn't sleep at first. Why I had nightmares. I missed her.

Ah Ren Tak. Until Kookie I didn't love anyone more. She made me happy, gave me a reason to live. But what I didn't know was she was finding more and more reasons to stop living. One day it was too much for her. I watched her fall off that bridge. I tried to catch her but I couldn't. I remember it so vividly. For the longest time I would get nightmares. After that I couldn't sleep.It scared me everynight to fall asleep. 

As I walked out Namjoon and Jin noticed my nose. 

"Taehyung, what happened?" 

"Nothing we just had an argument." I say.

"That's one hell of an argument." Namjoon commented before Jin punched his arm telling him to stop. 

I just walked away. It wasn't just an argument though. Even my heart knew that. Everything hurt. My head, my heart, my fist. I walked to my room but before I got there I punched a wall. It hurt but not as bad as it did to see him cry like that. I hurt him and I knew I did. That's what hurt most. He probably hated me. With every right to. I hit him after I told him I didn't want to love him. Nobody should ever have to go through that. 

Dammit what did I just do? I probably ruined the best chance at real love. An