CHAPTER V: OF TRUTHS. OF FAMILY. OF LETTING GO.

Truths they say are the realities of lies and the downfall of life yet in the end truth is a reminder for us that we are living.

Truths sheds light into our darkest hours as we struggle to fight our demons and stay sane as we move on from the pains of living in this twisted world.

Truths they say can set us free from the agony of figment realities in this world full of .

It’s been five months. Five months of torment and questions but Umji is still in a world full of unimaginable darkness. She’s been having the same dreams since the day Vernon lash out at her.

It was always the same. The boy. The spring. The trees. The water freely falling. The sunlight. The boy’s smile and as always she would be awoken by his words that always rings in her mind.

‘It’s not your fault, silly Yewon-ah’

Yes. It’s the truth it’s not her fault but every time she opens her eyes she can feel the heaviness in her chest. It’s always been like that for five months that the CEO of her company told her she can have a vacation but she decline because she knows that the moment she left her friends she’ll be alone.

She’ll be alone and will count all the misfortunes that happened and will happen in her life. And she will not let that happen. She promised herself she will not cry any more. She will fight back. She will not back down.

G-friend has just recently release their newest album and it help Umji grapple with her demons. Umji was able to fight all the pain lying in her heart as the questions lingers in her unanswered mind.

She tried so hard to forget what happened between her and Vernon but it always replays in her mind like her dreams that keeps on hunting her. It is also not helping that she always woke up in the middle of the night as she touch her ring. It is a promised they both shared with their grandparents.

They promised they will wear their rings. It’s silly but it feels like the ring also comforts Umji. She actually saw that Vernon was also wearing his ring in all their broadcast and she’s hopeful that no one will notice it.

She can also vividly remember the long talk she had with her parents regarding that ‘incident’ that becomes the reason ‘why’ Vernon hates her so much.

After finishing the recording of the first three songs for the preparation of their album Umji has been living in a world of confusion that when the CEO gave them a week to rest she went home with nothing in her mind but the question ‘Who is Haneul?’ and ‘Why am I dreaming about him?’.

She can still hear the voice of her mother pleading for her to not think about it but she really wants the truth.

The truth that might release her from the hell of being put in a situation where she can’t even remember she’s been a part of it.

‘Yewon-ah,’ her mother says with pain written in her face she continues ‘Haneul is Hansol’s older brother. He is young but is wise beyond his years. He is a kid that----‘

‘Mom, I don’t want that explanation. I want to know what happened that day because I’ve been in the dark for the past three months.’ Umji cried as she shouts her words in front of her parents.

‘Yewon-ah, Haneul he……. Haneul…….. He died while trying to take back your slipper it was what Hansol told us when we asks what happened. Yewon-ah, you were just a kid back then. The Choi family never put the blame on you because they know that it was an accident. After they left for them to heal their broken hearts we rush you to the hospital and when we arrived you were declared comatose by the doctor. I inform the Choi family and they wanted to come back here in Korea but I told not to because they’re still grieving for the son that was taken from them. Yewon-ah, I thought I was gonna lose you but I kept on asking Haneul to forgive you. I kept asking the lord to spare you because you’re still young. You were comatose for two weeks and when you wake up you had forgotten all about the Choi Family. You can’t remember the days you play with Haneul and Hansol.’ Umji’s mom explained as she fights back the tears that are going to fall.

‘Mom………… Why does it have to be me? Mom it’s just that questions are running wild in my mind and I can’t even find any answer from it. Do you know that Vernon hates me because he still blames me for the death of his brother? Mom I wish you could’ve told me about Haneul. I wish that you could’ve told me everything so that I know what to say to Vernon. I wish……. I wish……. Mom, do you know how hard it is to be kept in the dark? In a dark and lonely place where the only things I see is the questions floating in the air taunting me telling me I’m such an idiot. Mom………….’

‘We didn’t tell you because we didn’t have a choice. I want you to forget the pain of losing Haneul so I ask your dad not to say anything to you about the Choi Family. When you woke up after two weeks I was so hurt because you had change. You were not my Yewon. You became different. You didn’t even talk to us. You were just looking at the window of the hospital for almost a month and it pains me to see you like that so I opted not to tell you about Han---’

‘But mom I have the right to know. I have the rig----’

It was the word that hangs in that moment when Umji decided to leave. Her parents tried to follow her but she told them not to talk to her for a moment.

It hurts to see the pain in her parents eyes but it’s a decision she needs to live for her to piece back her past.

The past that will help her erase all of the unnecessary consequences in her present life so that she can live freely.

Umji can still feel the lingering pain in her heart but she has to fight her demons now. After a month of refusing to talk to her parents she finally called them. Telling them how sorry and ungrateful she is. She also told them that she’s strong enough to face her past that’s eating her away.

It is a tough decision but she needs to do it. She has to do it if she wants to be freed from all of it.

She looks outside of the window of the car driven by her manager when small droplets of silver rain cover the road of Seoul as they safely drive away. She can see the crystal water dancing with the wind freely falling without any hitch. Umji breathes deeply as she touches the ring in her finger.

It’s really ironic how the ring comforts her. It calms her mind and heart at once. The ring was supposed to anger her but it’s not. It rather gives her peace every time she remembers Vernon’s eyes full of anger.

*******

Five months had passed. It passed so slowly and painfully that Vernon keeps on trying to focus on their come back. A lot of his idol friends from the entertainment world had said their condolences and he acknowledge them.

It’s been so long but the pain is still raw as . No one from his friends dare to tackle the little drama he did on his grandfather’s wake. The little drama he directed where he is the villain and Umji is the protagonist.

He was a little bit annoyed when he remembered Umji’s face and the way she reacted to the things he had revealed.

After the talk he had with his father they never had the chance to talk again. It’s not that his running away from the problem but he is giving himself some time to piece back the broken shards of his heart.

It really is. It still hurts him like hell. The pain of losing someone still burns his heart. That someone is not just your brother but your best friend as well.

Vernon’s reminiscing of the past was stop when he heard the rain outside. He stood up for a moment and looks outside the window when he realizes that he’s playing with his ring.

He smiled. He smiled realizing that for over the year wearing his ring it had given him peace rather than pain and fear. Every time he would touch his ring the smiling face of his grandfather always calm him.

It’s ironic that the ring should bestow fear and anger inside him but it’s not rather the ring is like the sky that makes his emotion solemn.

Vernon keeps on watching the rain and is deep in thought when a sudden rapping of the studio’s door jolts back Vernon’s mind into the falling rain he had been staring for the last three hours.

‘MBC is really a pain in the head’ Vernon can hear their manager murmurs as he sat at the chair facing Vernon.

‘Hyung, Why?’ Vernon asks.

‘They are reviving ‘We got married’ and they sent us the invitation they want you boys to participate’

‘Really! Who is it that MBC wants to ditch in their program?’ Jeonghan excitedly a