13

*LUVLY POV

 

We arrived in front of my house at 10.45 pm.

It was -15 degree outside so I quickly followed Leena from behind as to avoid the cold.

Minho and Leena kept whispering at the back seats while I just shut myself, trying to stop thinking about Taemin.

Jonghyun was talking on the phone with his classmate about summer trip to Paldang Dam.

I was on my way inside when Jonghyun suddenly stepped out of the car and called me.

I turned and he said, “Wanna go out with me?”

“When?” I asked.

“Tomorrow...” he answered. “I’ll pick you up at 10. Sounds good?”

“Yeah... sure,” I said, smiling at him.

He walked toward me and gave me a light kiss at my lips and cheek.

I just pat his shoulder and ran inside.

That night, as I lie on bed, the scene where Taemin took the TAEMIN bracelet, kept lingering in my head.

He was mad.

That would be the first time ever that I saw him got mad.

But other than that, he looked rather irked and annoyed.

I put that aside and close my eyes, forcing myself to sleep.

Instead, a new thought kept flickering in my head.

Not a thought though...

More to a memory...

Memory of Taemin and I on our very first visit to the Lotte World.

 

*FLASHBACK*

 

“Two 1-day tickets please,” Taemin said, giving 30 000 won to the lady that guards the tickets and get 1-day tickets in return.

Taemin took my left hand and lead the way inside.

We head to the souvenir store first.

“Erm,” I looked around. “Why exactly are we here?”

“To buy this!” Taemin showed me the hair band thingy.

I gave him the look, if you know what I mean...

“C’mon! We’ll look cute together!” he said, giving me his unresistable cuteness.

Finally I agreed with a huge sigh.

We walked out from the shop with bear ear hair band thingy on our heads.

I still give him the look when we lined up for the roller coasters.

At noon, we rest for a while and Taemin brought me to one of his favorite dining there.

We shared drinks and eat fries with ham and chesse sandwiches.

I was kinda sloppy when I eat and drink at the same time.

Taemin chuckled a little when he cleaned my lower lip with his sleeve.

“Can’t you eat more properly?” he said, grinning at my action.

Pfftt...

“Shut up...” I said.

When we exited the dining place, someone bumped into me, causing me to fall.

Only I didn’t...

Taemin caught me just in time.

The man, who looked like he hadn’t shave for months, apologize a few times before ran inside.

“Kwenchana?” Taemin asked, worried.

I nod a few times, looking at someplace else as to avoid his eyes.

“Let’s go,” he said again, taking my hand and we left to continue our ‘journey’ throughout the whole place.

We went home late that night.

Da...

My feet were hurting, causing me to let go of Taemin’s hand and bowed to rub my ankle a few times.

“What’s wrong?” he asked when we stopped for the 5^th time in front of a bakery shop.

“My feet... It’s killing me...” I told him, exasperatedly.

He went quiet for a few short seconds before finally said, “C’mon... I’ll carry you.”

“You what?” I look at him in disbelief.

Did he even measure his weight and mine?

He just smiled at me when he asked me to get on his back.

I still stare at him in disbelief.

He look at me exasperatedly before said, “Do you want me to carry you like this or like a princess style?”

“I’d rather walk,” I replied, rubbing my waist but I get on his back anyway.

After a few minutes of walking, I can hear his breath.

I can tell he was tired.

“You can stop if you want to,” I said.

“No... I still can carry you,” he told me, holding back my body as it slid down his back.

I rested my head on his shoulder and said, “Gomawo...”

He didn’t said anything until a few minutes later when we entering my neighborhood and he opened his mouth and said, “Saranghaeyo... I hope you realized that I love you so much and I am willing to do anything for you... Anything...”

I didn’t said anything but I rubbed his shoulder as a sign that I do realized and I know what he’s trying to say.

“And I won’t let anything happen to you...” he said again.

Suddenly, he let me down.

“Wae? Are you tired?” I asked.

He shook his head while his hand squeezes my cheek.

His eyes stare deep into mine.

I smile, gripping his hand.

His face started to get closer.

And as we kissed, rain started falling.

Just like our first kiss.

 

REALITY

 

I woke up suddenly in the middle of the night only to realize that what I just dreamed about was just a dream.

Not in reality.

Well, technically it is a reality but it in the past.

And not in present time...

Which is what exactly happen NOW...

Yesterday, I may be with Lee Taemin.

But today, I’m with Kim Jonghyun.

I digest that fact in and close my watery eyes to sleep.

THE NEXT DAY

I ate my breakfast while my eyes glanced at my watch every minute or two.

After I finish my breakfast, I put on my sneakers and I heard the door bell rings.

Leena opened the door as I was struggling with sneakers.

“Annyeong oppa... You girlfriend will be up in another hour...” Leena greets Jonghyun.

“Leena!” I said out loud, catching up with her at the front door.

My boyfriend is here and he’s standing right in front of me and he look so smashing with his black cardigan and a matching jacket.

He gave me a sweet smile of his and I replied it by kissing his cheek.

Okay...

I have no idea why I did that...

He looked surprised.

I bid Leena goodbye and walked with Jonghyun.

Wait, walked?!

Where the hell is his car?!

“Where’s your car?” I asked.

“I didn’t bring it today. Decided to take the railway,” he said calmly, smiling at me.

His right arm rest on my shoulders while my left arm is around his waist.

We talked about current issues aka what happening in our little group.

“When will Hyori return back to Incheon?” Jonghyun asked.

“This afternoon,” I answered.

“Onew hyung is going to be suffered in a few days...”

We were in the train when I told him about Hyori unnie and Onew’s plans after graduating.

“Logo? Of all the things in the whole life world that they can explore and they chose Logo?” he said, raising his eyebrow.

“Exactly!” I said, glad that my boyfriend is agreed with me.

“So, what is your plan after graduating?” I asked.

He shrugged before answered, “Maybe I’ll pursue my study in music. Learn how to write songs and how to compose it to make a one unique and beautiful song fit with a wonderful harmony. Something like that...”

Wow... He got everything planned out.

What if he’ll forget about me?

What it he’s too busy with his work and classes that he’ll forget about his high school girlfriend?

This relationship won’t last long...

“What’s wrong?” he said, noticing my quietness.

“Huh? Owh... nothing,” I said, shaking my head.

He put his hand on my shoulders and turned my body so that I was facing him.

And he said, “I would never leave you alone...”

I look deep into his eyes and saw sincere.

All of a sudden, I felt guilty.

He gave me a hug and I hug him back, guilty and sadness overflowing.

We arrived at the city and I shot, “Where do we go first?”
“Let’s go over there,” he said, pointing at some random shop that sells clothes.

When we entered the shop, it sells not just clothes but a bunch of hats and shoes and other accessories.

Kinda ironic that ALL of them are sells in couples...

“What are we doing here?” I said, turning my head facing Jonghyun’s.

“To buy some stuff. C’mon! Let’s check everything out,” he said.

I followed him from behind like a puppy dog.

He showed me couples t-shirt, I rejected it.

He showed me couples belts, again, I rejected it.

He showed me couples necklace, and again, I rejected it.

He looks like he’d surrendered when he showed me couples rings, which I squealed, “PERFECT!”

It has an abstract design carved on it and it were the only two that have that same design, according to the store’s oppa.

“Want it?” Jonghyun asked.

“Yeah, why not?” I replied excitedly but turned gloomy a little second later.

“What’s wrong?” Jonghyun asked, noticing my changes.

I shook my head, before said, “Nothing... It just that it reminded me of Taemin...

He forced me to buy couples hair band thingy, which I hate it a lot...”

“Ouh...” Is all comes out of Jonghyun’s mouth.

He didn’t say anything later.

We walked out from the shop with the couples’ rings on our fingers.

I glanced at my watch and it showed 12.15 p.m.

“Hungry?”

“Kinda...” I replied.

I didn’t eat a lot at breakfast.

Just a piece of toast and some scramble eggs.

“Let’s eat first,” Jonghyun said.

I beamed at him and let him lead the way to any nearest dining.

When we’re entering the diner, someone bumped into me causing me to fall.

Only I didn’t.

Just like Taemin, Jonghyun caught me just on time.

I caught a little glimpse at the guy who bumped me.

The man looked like he hadn’t shave for months.

He looked familiar but I just can’t remember where.

He apologized to me a few times before he left in such a hurry.

Isn’t that the same person at the Lotte World?!

Strange...

“Kwenchana?” Jonghyun asked, worried.

“What? What’s wrong?” Jonghyun asked again.

“Nothing... It just that it was the same guy who collided with me at the Lotte World,” I answered, still staring at the man who had ‘long-gone’.

“I don’t remember him in any of our trip,” he said.

“Aniyo... Not when we were there... It was when Taemin and I were there...” I said.

Jonghyun frowned but doesn’t say anything.

He then took me hand and led inside.

He ordered two cup of rice and a few side dishes such as roasted meats, kkakdugi, and chicken soup.

Again, I was sloppy when I’m eating.

I gotta make sure before I date someone, I eat a lot.

So that when we’re on a date, and he ordered anything, I won’t eat like I’ve never seen food before.

You know what I mean?

Jonghyun smiled when he wiped my lips with his sleeve.

“Can’t you eat more properly?” he said.

“Shut up...” I said.

But then, I stopped eating.

“Wae? Why do you stop eating? Are you full? Do- Do you feel offended by what I just said? Mianei... Jinjja... I didn’t mean to...” Jonghyun stammered.

But I interrupted him, “Aniyo... It’s okay... Really... It just that it reminded me of Taemin... He use to do what you just did.”

“What I just did?” Jonghyun asked, looking confused.

“Yeah... He used to wipe my lips with his sleeve too...” I told him.

He doesn’t say anything afterwards.

But I noticed his expressions changes.

He looks tense and rather pissed.

I guess I’m the one who made him look like that.

And make situation feels awkward.

“Mianei...” I suddenly blurted out.

“Wae?” he asked, chewing his food.

“For talking about Taemin...” I replied.

“That’s okay... I mean, I know you didn’t mean to... What I just did and what Taemin had done, might’ve been a coincidence. Don’t worry ‘bout it,” he said, acting like he didn’t mind.

But he did mind.

I can tell.

But we continue eating our lunch in silence.

After Jonghyun paid and tips off the waiter, we left the restaurant and went someplace else.

He brought me to the music store where he used to sing me songs before that Hyukie returned back into SHINee’s life and Jonghyun doesn’t have time anymore to sing me songs.

He took me to the back of the store at our usual spot and sings me song.

“You are my everything, nothing your love won’t bring, my life is yours alone, the only love I’ve ever known, Your spirits pulls me through, when nothing else will do, every night I pray on bended knee, that you will always be my everything...”

I watched him as he sings and suddenly I felt overwhelmed.

I can tell that he love me so much.

But I...

I hold back my tears and I gripped his hand, causing him to stop playing the piano.

He looked at me in surprise.

Then, I don’t know what made me do it but I did it.

I kissed him.

There is one thing for sure.

This is to show how sorry I was that my mouth can’t stop talking about Taemin.

How sorry I was that he had love me so much but all I can send him back is by comforting him and acted like I love him even though the truth is...

I myself confused with my feelings.

How sorry I was that I lied to him.

And how sorry I was that I don’t feel like I love him anymore...

Mianei oppa...

 

A FEW HOURS LATER

 

So we walked and we talked and we eat and we kiss.

Jonghyun and I were walking back home when we stopped almost 5 times.

Why?

‘Cause my heels are hurting even though I was wearing my sneakers but still, we’ve been walking for HOURS...

At our fourth time stops, Jonghyun who was feeling a little bit annoyed said, “What exactly is wrong with you?!”

“My heels... It’s killing me,” I said, bending, trying to shake off the pain.

For a moment there I thought he didn’t care but then, “That’s it! Come on, Imma give you a piggyback ride,” Jonghyun said.

“Mwo?” I said, staring at him.

“GET BEHIND MY BACK. Do you want me to carry you like this or like a princess style?” he said.

“I’d rather walk,” I said, but like Taemin, I get on his back anyway.

Like Taemin...

Jonghyun must’ve felt my body stiff ‘cause he asked, “Wae? Remembered Taemin, again?”

No doubt there’s a sarcastic in his voice.

I quickly said, “Aniyo... I just remembered that I haven’t done my homework yet.”

Jonghyun didn’t say anything.

Maybe he just wanted to just let it go.

Thank god...

I rested my head on his shoulders and close my eyes.

His shoulders and back are warm.

I felt good despite the coldness.

Jonghyun must’ve thought I’m already sleeping ‘cause he suddenly said, “Yah Shin Hyo Young... Saranghaeyo... Why can’t you understand me? Why do you still talk about Taemin even though you’re no longer with him? Pabo... You’re denying your own feelings. Just like Taeminnie. You have no idea how he looks like when I told him to take the TAEMIN bracelet back. And you have no idea how YOU looked like when HE asked you to take it off.”

BWAH?!

Did he just said, he...

He...

YAH KIM JONGHYUN!

“I just hope that someday, you’ll choose the right one for you. The one that calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat, or will stay awake just to watch you sleep... Wait for the one who kisses your forehead, who wants you to show you off to the world when you’re in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you’re pretty without any makeup on. One who is constantly reminding you off how much he cares and how lucky he is to have you. The one who turns to his friends and says, ‘That’s her’...” Jonghyun said.

 

* = Flashback

 

*”Have I ever said to you that you look so yeoppo today?” Taemin grins.

I glared at him and said, “Why not hot?”

“Cause hot is for girls who impress boys of their appearance instead of their actions and personalities,” Taemin answered.*

 

*”Isn’t it beautiful?” Taemin said.

“Yeah...” I said, as we’re lying under the stars in October.

“Still feeling regretted that I force you to come out here, tonight?” Taemin asked.

“No.... Not anymore...” I said.

I could feel his eyes on me.

When I tried to turned, my lips are suddenly against him.

After a while, he let go of my lips, and breathed, “I can feel your heartbeat beating fast. Can you feel mine?”*

 

*”What had happen last night?” Leena asked. “Where the hell have you been? Why did Taemin sent you home with you on his back? Do you know that he came home after a few 15 minutes of persuading? He said, ‘I just wanna stay awake for a while to watch her sleep...’ What is that?”

Okay...

Let me just change the sentence of where I said, ‘Leena asked’ to ‘Leena nagged’.

“Wait what?!” I said, out of blue.

“Yeah... when I said a few 15 minutes, I do mean a few 15 minutes,” Leena said.

Aww... That’s so sweet...

I smiled to myself throughout the day.*

 

*”Saranghaeyo...” Taemin said when we’re stealing a few minutes of time heading to laboratory.

We’re right under the stairs right now and Taemin is confessing for a thousands times now.

He kisses my forehead and suddenly his arms were back around me, only this time he bent to kiss me. He tasted as good as he smells, so the kiss was nice and sweet.*

 

*”Annyeong guys... Feeling tired?” Jonghyun asked, approaching Leena and I who have just finished our ‘punishment’ of running around the gym for 10 laps.

Wanna know why?

Someone is stupid enough to enter the class bout 20 minutes late.

Wanna know who?

Lee Jae Kyung and her ‘bud’, Kim Min Jung...

The rest of SHINee were right behind him.

I was sweating when Taemin took my hand and said, “Didn’t my girlfriend look just fine when she’s sweats?”

“Didn’t my boyfriend looked just fine when I thrown him out of the window?” I smiled, sarcastically.

That pulled out smile from Taemin’s face.*

 

*We, Taemin and I, were walking together, holding hands at the back of our group.

Jonghyun, Key and Onew were talking among themselves.

Minho and Leena were snogging with each other.

I couldn’t even say eww when myself was flirting with Taemin.

Suddenly Key turned around and started walking backwards.

He said, “You couples are making me sick...”

“Wae?!” Minho said, hot.

“Cause you’re always flirt...” Key said.

Minho, feeling hot, ran toward Key and strangled him.

All of us laugh at them.

But I let go of Taemin’s hand.

Taemin look at me, feeling confused.

“People are staring...” I said.

“So? I don’t care. Why should you?” Taemin said, grabbing my hand once again.*

 

*”LUVLY!” Leena shouts.

Leena is not the type of shouting so when she shouts, it means something serious.

“WHAT?!” I shout back at her.

“YOUR BOYFRIEND HAD BEEN WAITING FOR YOU ALMOST 10 MINUTES!” Leena shouted back.

“I AM PUTTING-“ I was interrupted by Taemin.

He opened my bedroom door after knock it once.

“What on earth are you doing?” he asked me, sitting on my bed, looking up at me.

“What do you think I was doing? I’m putting my eye liner on,” I said, looking back at the mirror, concentrating back on my left eye.

Suddenly, he gets up from my bed and hugged my back.

“You don’t need to do that, you know... I love and care about all the same. You’re still pretty even with no makeup on,” Taemin said.*

 

*TAEMIN PERSONAL POV

 

”Where the hell is your girlfriend, Taemin?” Key hyung asked for god knows how many times.

We were planning on having a picnic and we’re still waiting for the twins to arrive.

Right after he asked, I saw Luvly bringing basket with Leena by her side and Minho by Leena’s side.

And I said, “That’s her.”