“I do not promise you all of Earth’s treasures. My gift to you is my heart. And if you decide to come with me you’ll know all my secrets. Even if on Earth there is nothing that is perfect. I want you in my life, and that’s not a secret.”— ur secret by Harmonik

 

 

The students were finally free from their responsibilities and could enjoy an actual festival; a festival where they had no responsibility beyond having fun.

 

After the five-days celebration ended, they were back at school to clean.

 

A party would be thrown as reparation for everyone’s hard work, there would be food, drinks, music and dancing, and their wrist would be knotted with the red band of pride and appreciation and fireworks were promised at the end of the day. Though it did not touch close to the actual festival they planned to go to the next day dressed in their traditional regalia, nonetheless, the teenagers were excited for dusk to come.

 

The first thing they were presented with when they filed in the courtyard that afternoon, groaning over not being able to join their family members and the graduated adults in their country and enjoy the ‘real’ festival, was their smiling school master who swiftly quieted them down and proceeded to thank them for their hard work in making the celebration a success and for welcoming the supreme leader with such grace and maturity. They had made the whole country proud to see them, the youth, work so hard, especially their department countryfolk. All she had was praise them and for their school and family for raising them so well.

 

They were then free to their own volition until the banding ceremony, which would take place when the sky turned deep ember and the huge fire was lit in the middle of the courtyard.

 

The time went by fast. Cleaning was strenuous work, but fun, because they got to hang out with their friends and they felt an overwhelming sense of liberation. Before the teenagers knew it, the sky had darkened after swirling into a canvas of blood red, fragile green, and shades of tender orange. The pale moon sat in the middle of the dark sky, with the distant stars dimming in comparison.

 

The town was alive with colorful lights.

 

Scented food spilled from the tables lining the courtyard, the music was loud, mixing with the melodious laughter and high—pitched conversations. This festive mood would last till the day after, dragging the Fire festival to seven days in total.

 

The Youth Infantry first order got the pleasure to light the large bonfire.

 

“Don’t they worry that we could set the whole compound on fire?” Changmin giggled.

 

Yunho threw him an amused glance, the corner of his lips curling. “Why would they?” He muttered, pressing the lever in the refillable butane lighter. “I am the general leading this expedition. I am confident in my abilities.” He shrugged cockily.

 

Changmin let out a half laugh, half howl, slapping Yunho on the back. “Cockiness do not suit you.”

 

“At least I am not crazy like you.”

 

“That’s an amazing comeback,” Jihun laughed, covering his mouth. Changmin sent him a glare.

 

“You’re so simple minded, all comebacks are great for you.”

 

“I don’t think you have great comebacks.” Jihun nonchalantly shrugged.

 

Yunho tried to stop from grinning.

 

“You kids done?” A supervisor shouted.

 

Turning around, Yunho smiled and hollered, cupping his lips, “We are.”

 

 

With music blaring through loud speakers, students congregated around the fire and the banding ceremony began.

 

Selected upper classmen and the supervisors tied the cherry red yarn around tan and milky slim and thick wrists, and they simultaneously wishes them a beautiful semester.

 

The longs lines of students waiting to have their wrist tied slowly, but surely began to shorten.

 

When most of the student body’s wrists were knotted, the dancing began. The celebration commenced with popular traditional dance music.

 

Yunho was dragged in the dancing line by a hyper Juhli who had a smile that took up half of her face. As he released her hand, dictated by the choreography, he passed by Jaejoong—the victim of an energetic Hyein who just desperately wanted to partake in the dancing, even though her friend pleaded with her, telling her he had two left feet. Their eyes met and held.

 

Jaejoong lifted the corner of his raspberry colored lips, the orange flickering flames reflecting of the dark pools of his eyes.

 

“Hey.” Jaejoong murmured.

 

Golly, he is handsome!

 

Yunho nodded, throat clogged.

 

Holding his breath, Yunho held Jaejoong’s hand for the quick leaping dance move. He hated letting go of his soft fingers when it came time to separate.

 

Jaejoong left Yunho with a jocular smile.

 

The dance ended. Yunho excused himself. “I am going to get something to drink.”

 

“I am thirsty, too.” Juhli’s exquisite eyes were smiling, face flushed with pleasure. “I’ll go with you.”

 

“Sure.” Yunho shrugged, walking next to her.

 

Tucking dark strands of hair behind the tan shell of her ear, the short girl said something Yunho missed most of.

 

“Sorry, could you speak louder?”

 

She nodded, wrapping her fingers around the width of her hair and lifted it off her wet bronze nape. “Do you want to…” Her brown eyes darted up to quickly graze Yunho’s attentive face before she looked away, cleared and finished, voice diaphanous “…catch the last day of festivities together tomorrow?”

 

Yunho felt troubled.

 

Juhli laughed shrilly and abruptly. “Not with just me,” she quickly assured. “Jaejoong and Hyein and the others will be there. We agreed to see the fireworks together. Since...” she began wringing her fingers together.

 

Jaejoong will be there.

 

Yunho smiled down at the boxy girl. “Yeah, sure. Thanks for asking.”

 

The girl brightened. “Cool. Let’s enjoy the last day together.”

 

“Sure thing.”

 

They arrived at the refreshment tables and Yunho reached for a water bottle from one of the large coolers.

 

Relaxing against the edge of one of the table, Yunho sipped his ice-cold water, his eyes taking in the night, the smiling faces of his peers, and scavenged for Jaejoong.

 

The night was beautiful. It was stifling. There was not a single ripple of cool air.

 

Yunho sighted Jaejoong smiling down at Hyein, Changmin, Heejun and Jihun was with them, also laughing and talking in an exaggerated fashion.

 

Standing up, Yunho opened his mouth to excuse himself and go join them when the music changed, and a popular track that was released that summer began player. The students cheered, whooped, and people began running to where the dancers were, swallowing Jaejoong and the rest of his friends.

 

“I love this song!” Juhli screamed, looked at Yunho with her beautiful eyes gleaming and tilted her head toward the dancers.

 

“Let’s go dance then.” Yunho beamed. Her enthusiasm was cute—that he could not deny.

 

“This is good.”

 

Both friends twisted their head to look at Sungyeol who was stuffing his face, sweat pouring down his temple.

 

“Save some for us, too,” Yunho teased, reaching for Juhli. She gasped, her arm going slack, and she hastily started laughing nervously, half running. Yunho couldn’t help but think she had a trippy, nervous air about her.

 

The students were singing at the top of their lungs. Yunho continued looking for a pale face with large bottomless doe eyes.

 

Juhli bumped into a girl friend and they began dancing together, singing with their eyes closed. Their gaiety made Yunho happy, too.

 

Amongst the throng of perspiring bodies, booming laughter, and voices competing to be heard over each other and the blaring music, Yunho felt his wrist cuffed and he was dragged into the darkness.

 

He gasped when bright, cat-like eyes found his in the yam—orange lit darkness.

 

“It’s me, Jaejoong.”

 

“Jaejoong.” Yunho puffed like an idiot. He was simply mesmerized by Jaejoong’s up—tilted face and his intense gaze.

 

“Can I talk to you?”

 

The low timber of Jaejoong’s voice and the warmth of his fingers around his wrist made Yunho want to erase the slight height difference between them, dip down and press his lips on his.

 

The want was a first for the general. He both welcomed and hated the hunger.

 

Taking a step back, Yunho shook his head to regain his sanity, confusing Jaejoong, before he rapidly nodded and allowed a weak smile to coat his lips. “Yes.”

 

Both of their eyes dropped to where Jaejoong’s fingers rested. He yanked his hand back. Self—conscious. “Sorry. Let’s go.”

 

Walking behind Jaejoong, his back illuminated by the moon, the night felt endless.

 

The two eighteen—year—old made for the wood. There they wouldn’t be heard or caught. Whatever they were going to share with each other would stay between them.

 

As he followed Jaejoong, Yunho spied Sungyeol who was walking backward waving at Myungsoo. They were going in the opposite direction away from the rest of their peers—like Jaejoong and Yunho.

 

Myungsoo jogged towards his friend, mouthing something he reached for Sungyeol’s outstretched hand. The action was done in a fashion that gave Yunho the impression that it was natural to them.

 

Sungyeol stepped back and placed his hands behind his back, the outline of a teasing smile shone on his content face. Myungsoo grabbed his friend’s bulging bicep, stood in front of him, head tilted up. They exchanged words. Sungyeol laughed. Myungsoo reached for his hand and gripped it, fusing their fingers together, a triumphant grin on his face, and they began walking shoulder to shoulder away from the rest of the joyous teens and into the darkness.

 

A darkness that house secrets. Their secrets. It was their friend.

 

The athletic male quickly peeled his eyes away from the best friends’ receding backs and focused on Jaejoong.

 

Yunho began overthinking.

 

Maybe what he felt for Jaejoong was normal and he was not the only one; was he just being hopeful, he wondered? He didn't want to be the only one in this country in love with a male and be a deviant. But he wanted him so much.

 

He gazed back at Jaejoong’s lean silhouette. Yunho wanted to walk next to him and grab his hand and intertwine their fingers, like Myungsoo and Sungyeol.

 

His mind was going in the wrong direction.

 

Sungyeol and Myungsoo are best friends. Just best friends.

 

They entered the wood and a distracted Yunho’s foot caught on something.

 

His hands flung around for a hard surface.

 

Jaejoong gripped his arm, saving him from crashing on his face. “You do not have to kill yourself. I am not going to say anything scary.”

 

Jaejoong’s simper was crocked as he looked up at his friend, the distance between their bodies little.

 

He couldn’t help but laugh at Jaejoong’s poor try at humor. Somethings never changed.

 

“Thanks.”

 

“You’re welcome.”

 

He released the taller male and stepped back.

 

“So...umm, I—” Jaejoong looked around, the large broad—leaf trees casting them in darkness, and began wringing his hands together. “I want to talk about—” he paused abruptly and shook his head. “No, I want to apologize for that night.”

 

“What?” Yunho frowned, scratching his nape.

 

They strolled deeper in the woods. Yunho following behind a stuttering Jaejoong.

 

“For—”

 

“No. Do not apologize. I should.” Yunho blushed. Looking sideways he inhaled, the heady scent of the damp earth combined with old fallen leaves washed over him as he tried to calm down while he recalled that night. He felt embarrassed, face and ears burning, his throat clogged with frustration. “I didn’t mean to—”

 

Jaejoong flipped around, eyes flashing with unrecognizable emotions. “Don’t. I...I appreciated—appreciates—your friendship.” He threaded his fingers through his hair, his eyes wandering. He feared Yunho could hear his drumming pulse.

 

Friendship. Right.

 

Yunho flattened his lips into a smile dipped in sadness. “Me too.”

 

Jaejoong flipped his head up, the radiance of his smile putting the moon, which hang over his shoulder in its drunken stupor, to shame. “I just want us to…to remain friends. Be good.” Gripping the hem of his shirt, he started wringing it—anxiously.

 

Yunho couldn’t do it anymore. He couldn’t stand in front of Jaejoong, beauty intensified by the obsidian night, and lie to him that all he wanted for him was friendship; That he was normal; That he didn’t dream about kissing him, touching his skin, feeling his warmth and softness, and tucking him in his arm and never letting him go; That he didn’t wish he could sink his nose in his glossy mane and take a waft, and be with him forever.

 

He wanted him.

 

Yunho had never wanted another human being like that before. Yunho realized the extent of his want with each passing day ever since he had come into his feelings.

It was more than lust. He knew what ual longing was, he was a normal eighteen—year—old and did e, though with no one in mind. What he felt for Jaejoong was different. Not entirely so, but more intense. He wanted him in numerous of ways he could not give a name to.

 

Though this might spell the end of his life if he confessed. If he miscalculated and Jaejoong had ignored him and was now apologizing because he did not want him to come clean and potentially destroy a beautiful friendship. Yunho knew he would be chancing being punished and send to correctional camp, even if he didn’t even know for certain if such things existed.

 

Yunho was scared. He knew, however, that he could not continue pretending anymore. It hurt. And the hurt grew with each day that passed.

 

On that innumerable summer night, where it felt as if the heat would suffocate him, eyes dry and burning, Yunho took a step toward Jaejoong and interrupted him from finishing his thought. “Jaejoong—”

 

“No. Let me finish.” Jaejoong said, intercepting. If he did not do it now that he had the courage and the opportunity, he did not believe he will do it any other time.

 

Now or never.

 

“No, I—”

 

“Yunho, what I feel for you…” Jaejoong took a quick pause and organized his thoughts, eyebrows coming together, eyes trailing on the ground. “I know we are friends. I know I am a guy, and you…”

 

Yunho’s heart leaped in his throat.

 

He lifted his eyes and looked at Yunho who was peering intently at him. “You are a male, like me. But, what I feel for you, Yun—Yunho,” he stuttered, the sound of his pounding heart filling his ears. “What I feel is more than I should as a male and a friend, and I am sorry.” Jaejoong’s fists were so tight, it hurt like hell, matching the fire rolling in his chest.

 

Complete silence.

 

Yunho stared at him in sheer shook. Frozen. Eyes wide, like a prey seeing the danger for the first time, but it was too late.

 

Please do something. Anything!

 

Jaejoong’s wish was soon granted. The male staggered on the ground, crouching, gripping his knee his head hanging low.

 

Was the shock of his confession too much?

 

“Yunho?” Jaejoong crouched in front of him, not daring to reach out and touch him. “Are you—?”

 

Yunho flipped his head back, a large smile overtaking his countenance. He was laughing.

 

He is laughing.

 

 “You do not mind?” the singer cautiously asked, trying to make sure it was genuine happiness he saw in his eyes. A happiness that told him he felt as he did. His feelings were reciprocated.

 

“I...Thank you for...sharing that with me.” Yunho sounded breathless. He inhaled deeply. “I...I didn’t have the words to describe—to explain my feelings. I...I also feel...differently for you. That’s what I was going to tell you.” He smiled.

 

Nothing could compare to what Jaejoong felt at that moment. The relief. The elation. It took all his willpower to not pull Yunho in his arms and crushed him in his embrace.

 

“Really?” Jaejoong breathed, his body sagging, but the rate of his beating heart increased in excitement. He crocked his head, his skin stark white in contrast to the dark, gray background, and let a soft, loose smile hang off his rose—colored lips.

 

Yunho nodded.

 

“I like you,” the singer confessed, and reached for Yunho’s hand, which he readily gave and welcomed the meeting of their palms and the tender squeeze of his fingers. “I really, really like you,” Jaejoong added, voice muffled by his arm that was hanging on his knees, where half of his face hid, except for his bright eyes.

 

“Me too. I really, really like you,” Yunho declared, feeling emancipated.

 

What occurred next was what they both hadn’t even had the words or the imagination to conjure.

 

Sitting next to each other with their back against the large trunk of a beech tree, the side of their arms and thighs pressing together, they tried to make sense of their new relationship.

 

The freedom that came with not having to keep their feelings deep in their heart anymore made the world shimmer.

 

They knew their relationship, their feelings, and everything that they shared had to stay a secret, as dating wasn’t allowed even amongst different couples. But so what? They wanted each other, and now could have what they wanted. That’s all that mattered. They would deal with reality when that time come.

 

The world felt as if it were tilted off its axis. The two eighteen-year-old males were inebriated with happiness.

 

Yunho felt his pulse would tear though his skin and jump out and run away from the way it pounded. He sneaked little peeks at Jaejoong’s side profile, his eyes hooded, eyelashes forming an inverted crown on his pale cheeks. He was shyly biting his plump, delectable bottom lip. Yunho’s eyes followed the little action, heat pooling in his lower belly. He shifted his position.

 

“The moon is really pretty tonight,” Jaejoong muttered, voice catching in weird places, and lifted his head to peak at the gray orb through the dark leaves.

 

Yunho tittered tipsily and tilted his head up to gather what he could of the sky through the slits the leaves of the densely packed trees. Yunho could not help but see the parallel with how he always said the same thing. But the nights were beautiful that summer.

 

The sight of Jaejoong’s beautiful face, his warm body pressing against his, and his fragrance, citrus, all were drugging Yunho. He tentatively reached for his fingers.

 

Now biting his bottom lip, Jaejoong allowed Yunho to lace their fingers together, letting their hot clammy palms meet in a sensual embrace.. They did not dare look at each other.

 

They looked away from the sky at the same time and locked eyes. Their head drew closer till their balmy breath mingled. Eyelids lowered, lashes brushing heated cheeks, too embarrassed to directly hold each other’s gaze.

 

Yunho waited tensely for Jaejoong to fully lean in, his breathing slightly labored.

 

The kiss was awkward and chaste. Their first. It was salty, sticky, warm, and soft. Nothing more than the meeting of closed lips.

 

The first firework went off then. Behind the line of Jaejoong’s shoulders, brilliant fluorescent petals bloomed in the sky, making Yunho gawked in awe before it disappeared with a sizzle. He closed his eyes harder and pressed his lips harder against Jaejoong’s soft one, trying to make the moment last forever, trying to imprint the texture and warmth of Jaejoong’s lips into his memory.

 

A soft sighing—moan from Jaejoong made Yunho relaxed and turned the kiss feather soft.

 

They parted, locked eyes and laughed and laughed and laughed before Jaejoong reached for Yunho’s face, cupping one cheek and holding the back of his neck he caught his lips again.

 

He had been hungry for Yunho’s lips for so long. He poured his passion out in the open.

 

They slowly figured how to position their head and avoid bumping noses.

 

Jaejoong simply followed his instincts. He did not want to holdback anymore. He Yunho’s bottom lip, he felt him tremble. The reaction tucked a smile on his lips.

 

He changed the position of his hand and instead decided to grip Yunho’s hair, sending thrills down Yunho’s spine.

 

Another loud booming sound, a sizzle, and it was gone. They missed the second one.

 

They caught the rest. Heads spinning from the chaste, salty kisses. Bodies thrumming with happiness.

 

In the heat of that summer, it felt like the season would never end. Their perfect little bubble of teenage angst, happiness, and insecurities appeared to have taken precedence and would never pale to anything.

 

Getting up to leave the woods, Yunho ducked his head, with a spark of a smile, and said softly, “I want to hold your hand.”

 

Jaejoong’s eyes flicked toward him. “So, hold it.” The corner of his lips tugged up.

 

And so, he did.

 

 

Walking home that night, they remained close, their fingers occasionally rubbing, and they smiled timidly each and every time.

 

The group of teenagers were loud, laughing as If they owned the world.

 

Sungyeol somehow managed to get Changmin to carry him on his back. Heejun teased Myungsoo, asking if he did something to his best friend to get him to get Changmin to carry him in his stead. Chuckling, Myungsoo kicked Heejun’s lightly on the and moved to Sungyeol’s .

 

“I do not want to hold Sungyeol. He is heavy,” the quiet male jested.

 

Changmin growled, irate, and pushed a complaining Sungyeol off his back and glared at his friend. Myungsoo shrugged at him with a smug look. 
 

“No, Changmin, please carry me!”

 

“Make Myungsoo do it. He is your boyfriend, and he is right: you are heavy.”

 

“No,” Sungyeol whined, gripping the annoyed male’s arm as if he was his life line. “I am so tired. I cannot walk. Please.”

 

“Myungsoo, get your boyfriend.” He tried to shake him off. It was not easy to get Sungyeol off you.

 

The group of friends laughed. Myungsoo did welcome the complaining Sungyeol.

 

“And so, the festival is over.” Heejun yawed, stretching. “What’s your plan for the last two weeks we have off?”

 

They all shared their plans.

 

In five days both Jaejoong and Yunho would be departing from their town for the plans they’ve already made. They hated being reminded that they would not get to hang together much out of school. And they have just began to!

 

Yunho already missed Jaejoong while standing right next to him.

 

He tapped the side of his hand against Jaejoong who was looking straight ahead. Yunho couldn’t see the light shade of pink that coated his pale cheeks, but he sighted the way the corner of his lips lifted.

 

They shared a secret that was bigger than the two of them, but it was theirs. Just their little secret.

 

“Know what I said about going to the beach, let’s do that,” Changmin suggested, excited. It finally felt like summer.

 

A half day trip by the train if they were to take the fastest train, which was known as LineA.

 

“I am game!” the best friends, Sungyeol and Myungsoo, shouted in addition with Mino and a few other of their friends.

 

Jaejoong and Yunho excused themselves.

 

Jaejoong added, as a final thought, “I’ll ask the girls if they want to join you guys.”

 

Changmin’s smile was overpowering. “You do not have to,” he said.

 

Jaejoong masked his laugh in a cough. “No. Ju said she wanted to go to the beach. I think she’ll appreciate it.”

 

Changmin made a face. “Doubt it.”

 

“We’ll ask our lady friends to come, too,” Jihun said, thoughtfully. “It might make the girls awkward if they are the only two among us men.”

 

“Men?” Mino scoffed.

 

“What? Are you not a man?”

 

Mino shook his head. “I am, you’re not. You are a little boy, Jihun, who probably still wet his bed.”

 

“Hey! Do not deflect!”

 

Changmin loudly added, hoping to quash the childish banter, “That’s nice of you, Jihun.” He laughed pulling the teen in a headlock. Mino and Jihun shared one last look.

 

 “Do you like one of your girl friends and want to see her in a bikini. Could it be—”

 

Jihun punched Changmin in the belly, quelling him from finishing his thought.

 

“You are making me rethink my offer.”

 

“You know you won’t.”

 

The boys howled their agreement.

 

Ignoring them, Myungsoo said to Yunho, hands behind his head. “Too bad about you two going away. How about we hang out once before you leave?”

 

“Let’s do that.” Yunho lightly punched his friend on the shoulder.

 

“Make sure to invite the girls you know, alright?” Changmin reminded everyone. He meant the girls from their respective departments.

 

“Yeah, yeah. We will.” Sungyeol rolled his eyes before whining, rubbing his belly, “I am hungry.”

 

“You just ate!” Myungsoo declared, staring in astonishment at his best friend.

 

Sungyeol shrugged, smile sheepish. “My mother says I have a dark hole in my belly, plus,” he paused, eyes flicking on Myungsoo, “I did a lot of exercise tonight.”

 

“Sungyeol!” Myungsoo gasped, covering his lips a bit too late. He elbowed the cackling classical instrumentalist.

 

“What?” the good—looking teen laughed, moving away from Myungsoo. “I did do a lot of rigorous exercise.”

 

“Shut up, please.” Myungsoo begged.

 

“What were you doing?” An interested Mino asked, ceasing his conversation with Jihun and a few others.

 

“Ask Myungsoo,” Sungyeol joked, running away from Myungsoo’s raised hand. He wasn’t going to hit him. He would never. Which was admirable on his part, their friends though, because Sungyeol could get on the nerve—often. The quiet teen had been about to pull him to his side and keep him mute, an impossibility when it concerned the mouthy Sungyeol.

 

Myungsoo shook his head, grimacing he started running after a shrieking Sungyeol.

 

“He is not hungry, nor tired” Mino said, shaking his head and going back to his friends, seamlessly picking up where he left off on his banter with Jihun.

 

Yunho simply shook his head at his friends’ happiness and smiled over at Jaejoong who gravitated a bit closer to him.

 

Laughter followed them home.

 

The tips of their fingers touched while walking.

 

It felt perfect. It was perfect.

 

Writer’s Note: Did anyone guessed what Juhli was staring at in the last chapter?

Writer’s Note: From now on, the majority of the chapters will be this ‘short.’ As always, pls enjoy and bless me with comments. Thank you. And lots of bo!

Chapter seventeen preview: The group of friends go to the festival—catching the last of the celebration. Yunho cannot keep his eyes off Jaejoong. Changmin cannot stop raving. Hyein is her badass, clingy self. The birdies go for a morning run and playing around turned serious real fast, and after that they talked.