Like the youngers have suggested, Hakyeon decided to go pay a visit to Taekwoon’s parents and bring along some of Taekwoon’s photo for them. It wasn’t just the members who were having a hard time without Taekwoon but the vocalist’s parents were also in much stress and worries for their missing son. When the members told the elders of the entire story, they were almost too shocked to accept the truth. They couldn’t believe how much had happened during the past several months, all the way up from when Hakyeon first fainted.

‘Welcome, Hakyeonie.’ Taekwoon’s mother greeted the boy and let him in. She invited him to stay for the few nights he was there for the visit.

‘Thank you Mrs. Jung.’ Hakyeon said. ‘How are you and Mr. Jung?’

‘My husband have been very busy lately… most likely trying to preoccupy himself with work so that he doesn’t think too much of Taekwoon.’ She sighed. ‘But how are you?’

‘I’m doing all right… I’m sorry we haven’t been able to do anything in particular for you.’ Hakyeon apologized.

‘You have done more than enough. You have been through just as much as everyone else and you did your best to bring my son back. You are fighting so much on your own and I am sure that as long as we keep faith, Taekwoon will see that and come back to us soon.’

Strangely enough, Hakyeon who should have been the one to comfort the older lady ended up being the one receiving the comfort instead. Hakyeon wants to continue believing in Taekwoon’s return just as the elder does.

Hakyeon ended up staying at Taekwoon’s bedroom during his stay. Taekwoon’s mother showed her around and treated Hakyeon like her own son. She showed pictures of Taekwoon’s childhood and even told the leader some of the embarrassing stories of the vocalist in which no one knows about.

She has always been worried, like all other mothers would, that as their child grows up, they would eventually drift away from family. Taekwoon’s mother have always worried for her child because Taekwoon was always so quiet. She was afraid the youngest son would not make any friends or have time adjusting to society. That’s why, when she finally got to meet the members of VIXX, she was able to sigh a relief knowing how caring the members were.

The boys weren’t just members of the same group as Taekwoon or coworkers but also brothers, family and friends.

As they looked through the albums, Hakyeon noticed something.

‘When was this?’ He asked her.

‘That’s a picture taken in front of the clubroom when Taekwoon entered high school and joined the soccer team. I still remember how happy he was when he came back home one day saying that he was going to be a regular of the team. I have never seen him so delighted before.’ She smiled in reminiscence.

~

‘Hakyeon-ah, wake up. It’s morning already,’ the other said in a melodic sweet voice.

‘Just a little longer,’ Hakyeon mumbled while he was still half asleep.

‘You’re such a sleepyhead. Come on now, my mom made breakfast for us,’ he told the older.

As Hakyeon opened his eyes, he saw a rare and sweet smile from the boy who slept next to him. How can anyone want to wake up from such a warm and sweet morning call?

‘Just a little more.’ Hakyeon tried to whine his way out of it.

‘Just a little more than.’ He ruffled Hakyeon’s hair and making him fall back into slumber once more. If only this was real…

Beep. Beep. Beep.

The alarm went off.

Disturbing his sweet dream as the morning came and the bright sun lightened up the entire room.

He didn’t dare to open his eyes though… his tears continued to fall as he recalled the dream just now.

‘Taek…woon…’ Hakyeon tried to cover his eyes with the back of his arms, refusing to believe that everything was simply a dream. ‘I miss you…’

He told himself that he was okay and that he was trying to convince himself that he could wait. He’s been trying so hard to convince the others too that he was all right. That everything will eventually return to normal.

But just how long is ‘eventually’?

He was able to convince everyone but himself.

Beep. Beep. Beep.

He turned the alarm off and woke up after a while. He rubbed the remaining tears from his eyes and went to the bathroom to cleanse his face.

Like all other days.

It has been a few days now since he started to stay at Taekwoon’s home but being here, only made Hakyeon think of the unnecessary things. Every corner of this place was filled with memories of Taekwoon’s childhood and upbringing. Times where Hakyeon did not know Taekwoon yet.

After breakfast, Hakyeon walked around the neighborhood for a stroll and to see what it feels like to walk in the same neighborhood as Taekwoon grew up in. The streets the other had walked, the shops he could have possibly visited; this is Jung Taekwoon’s hometown.

As he continued to walk along the streets, Hakyeon noticed a familiar gate. The entrance to Taekwoon’s high school.

This is the place where he joined the soccer team right? The place where he graduated from huh? Hakyeon grew rather curious at Taekwoon’s old school.

Although the two of them attended the same university along with Wonshik, neither of them really had times when they felt as if they were actually classmates.

They were in different majors and had very different schedules. Sometimes, their courses and assignments would be done online rather in class due to their busy schedules as idols. So, Hakyeon never really knew what it would have been like to be the classmate of Taekwoon’s. What would it be like to sit next to the stoic Taekwoon during high school?

If Hakyeon had grown up in the same district as Taekwoon instead of Changwon, they could have possibly gone to the same school and maybe, even in the same class.

Hakyeon asked the security guard if he could look around the school by lying to the man saying that he is helping his sister find a high school for his two nephews. Who, by the way, are only eight and ten. But the kind man let Hakyeon in regardless and even showed him around.

It was the weekend and the only students who were hanging around the school were those with club practices.

Hakyeon looked onto the field and tracks to see a bunch of kids playing soccer. In an instant, he couldn’t help but feel a bit of nostalgia and smiled. It reminded him so much of Taekwoon who was always so happy playing the sport with his friends. Everyone knew that if it wasn’t for Taekwoon’s injury, he would have most likely played soccer for the country rather than becoming an idol singer.

Hakyeon was never good at anything too athletic though, especially soccer. For some reason, his feet didn’t allow him to move as he wanted while he played soccer compared to when he’s dancing. It just felt so different for some reason.

The older sighed a bit and smiled as he walked towards Taekwoon’s old classroom. Taekwoon’s mother had told Hakyeon so many stories there was about her son, and even told Hakyeon the seat that Taekwoon was occupied in.

Always to the side and near the windows at the back of the room.

Hakyeon found Taekwoon’s desk immediately and traced his hands on the shiny wooden surface. Hakyeon is sure that the desk has been replaced with a new one but that didn’t change the fact that this was where his lifelong friend once sat in during class.

He grabbed the chair from the seat next to it and sat down.

Morning, Taekwoonie. He played the mini scenario in his head. Just imagining Taekwoon sitting next to him during class…

He shed another tear.

‘What is wrong with me today?’ He asked himself. He’s been holding on strongly for the past several days and this entire time after returning to the real world. But as he found old memories of Taekwoon and even came to this place to learn about the vocalist, Hakyeon couldn’t control his emotions anymore. ‘I miss you dammit.’

Please, just come back to me already.

After calming down a bit and recollecting his emotions once more, Hakyeon decided it was time to go back. It was just enough for him to see and feel the place where Taekwoon once went to school. Though he was never by the vocalist during their high school years, Hakyeon was content enough to be able to visit this place.

Just as he passed by the hallways, he bumped into someone.

‘Ow! Sorry.’ Hakyeon bowed nonstop to apologize.

‘N?’ Someone called him by his stage name. ‘You’re VIXX’s N right?’

Hakyeon looked up at the stranger.

‘I am… you are?’

‘You’re in the same group as Taekwoon right?’

‘Yes I am. You know Taekwoon?’ Hakyeon asked.

‘Of course. We were classmates since freshman year and even joined the same soccer team.’

‘Really?’

‘Mhmm. I’m currently the soccer coach here. How is … he?’

Hakyeon noticed that slight hesitation of the stranger’s voice. Why?

‘He’s um, doing great.’ Hakyeon had to lie of course.

‘I see.’ The stranger sighed in relief. ‘That’s good to hear.’

‘What’s wrong?’

‘Huh? Well um, he had quite a rough time when we were in high school and well, I just wanted to know if he was alright again. That’s all.’

‘Again?’ Hakyeon didn’t understand. ‘Did something happen to him while he was in high school?’

The strange who claims to be Taekwoon’s classmate and friend looked at the leader for a good long minute. He was definitely debating on whether or not to tell Hakyeon the whole story about the vocalist, Jung Taekwoon, of VIXX.

‘Please.’ Hakyeon initiated. ‘Tell me. Taekwoon is a really good friend and member to VIXX. I want to be able to help and understand him.’

The leader ‘N’ was very sincere and the stranger could tell. He walked Hakyeon to the clubroom to tell the older about everything that had happened in the past.

‘Taekwoon, he… well, he wasn’t always the stoic or pokerfaced kid you know.’ He began. ‘He used to love coming to school and laughing along with the others. He could be really loud whenever we were playing soccer.’

‘He did?’ Hakyeon couldn’t really imagine it.

‘Yeah. It’s… it’s my fault that he’s changed.’ The stranger’s face fell and took a deep breath. ‘We weren’t just classmates or teammates. We were really good friends since elementary school. Our parents were friends of one another’s too and Taekwoon and I talked about joining the soccer team since we were kids. So, when we came to this school, it was obvious that we would be joining the team together. We even made a promise to go to the junior national’s league together and becoming professional soccer players once we graduate.’

‘What happened?’

‘It was me. I was being immature and jealous of his natural talents. Our coach back then was going to put Taekwoon on the regulars team while I was benched on the sides. I got upset. Angry and couldn’t understand what it was that Taekwoon had, that I didn’t. I started to… bully him. I outcasted him in front of others and turned my back from him.’

‘How… could you?’

‘I know! I know it was stupid. I was young back then and being on the official team was all that I have ever wanted, dreamed of. Even after I stopped mocking him, others didn’t. I became the trigger for them to hurt Taekwoon even more. Then, he got injured during a match and couldn’t go back playing soccer the way he used to. I eventually took his place. I should have been happy you know, but I wasn’t. I saw how much he has changed and how he locked himself away from people. He didn’t smile anymore nor did he approach anyone on his own. He turned away from everyone and hid himself instead.’

So that’s why Taekwoon became so untrusting towards others and tried to divide himself from people? Because his best friend turned against him…

‘I should have known best that for every athlete, the sport is only enjoyable if you can play it with people you can rely on and trust. Yet, I betrayed him. I saw his change but was a complete idiot for not apologizing to him when I had the chance. Even now, I’m too afraid to meet him and tell him how sorry I am… Even after graduation, he and I did not speak a word. But I was surprised when I heard from another friend that the quiet Taekwoon was becoming an idol! Of all people, I would have never thought he’d be the one to even enter that industry.’

Hakyeon could relate to that. Taekwoon’s personally just wasn’t very idol-fitting. The vocalist only liked to sing but didn’t enjoy being in front of the camera or the public like Hakyeon did.

‘But, it seems that he’s changed a bit after becoming a part of VIXX.’ The classmate told him.

‘What do you mean?’ Hakyeon asked.

‘It seems like he’s regained his smile again, even if it is just a little. And that’s because of you guys. I’ve watched your debut and some of the shows your group was in. I was worried about Taekwoon and I wanted to see how he’s adjusting alone. Plus, your group is full of younger kids, all hyper and energetic compared to Taekwoon that I was worried about him fitting in.’

Hakyeon chuckled a bit. ‘I understand that. We can be a bit loud at times.’

‘But I’m glad to see him smile again. And that’s all because of you guys.’

‘Thanks.’

‘Um hey, can you watch over Taekwoon for me? Make him smile and laugh a lot. I was the worst friend anyone could possibly have but I know that you guys aren’t like that. So please, help him find his happiness.’

Hakyeon smiled.

‘I will. I promise.’

~

Hakyeon finally returned back to Taekwoon’s home after his little journey down the neighborhood. He went around the house to help do some of the cleaning while Taekwoon’s parents were at work. He felt bad for staying over the past few days without doing much and only receiving so much hospitality. He wanted to make sure the place was clean and spotless before he returns to the dorms.

They were going to prepare for their next concert Live Fantasia. And though they were going to stall the date of the concert until Taekwoon’s return, Hakyeon felt that he shouldn’t make everyone wait any longer. In fact, it might even be best to tell the public and their fans about everything that has happened thus far. They might be seen as a group of lunatics, idols going through too much stress that they’re having delusions but, Hakyeon knew that their group can’t go into a hiatus anymore.

As he continued to pack his belongings, Hakyeon decided to take a look at Taekwoon’s childhood photo album once more.

‘Haha. This poker face even when he was a kid. To think… you went through all of that during high school yet didn’t say it to anyone. Even your mom doesn’t know about it does she?’ Hakyeon looked at each photo in the album with care. ‘No wonder you couldn’t really trust us.’

He didn’t think that the reason for Taekwoon’s lost of smile is because of his past. Hakyeon really didn’t know anything about this ‘lifelong’ friend of his and Hakyeon wished he had known sooner. That way, he wouldn’t keep pressuring Taekwoon so much during their trainee years and clinging onto him so much.

Hakyeon sighed.

‘I should have been a bit more sensitive around you. I knew you didn’t like me clinging onto you so much but I still did it anyways…’ he sighed again. ‘Why am I so stupid?’

As he flipped through the album, he came across a photo with a strangely familiar scenery.

‘Huh? Isn’t this the place where I did that dance competition back in high school?’ Hakyeon picked up the photo to take a closer look. He turned the photo around which wrote Korean Youth Dance Festival, 2009.

‘No way! Taekwoon was there also? Did he see my performance then?’ Hakyeon gulped at such a coincidence. Then, Hakyeon cracked a giggle as he thought to himself that even though they have met in the past, neither knew of one another. Taekwoon most likely didn’t care enough to remember anyways. He probably didn’t even pay attention to notice that Hakyeon was one of the contestants and eventually the grand prizewinner that year.

Hakyeon placed the album back where he found it and sat down at Taekwoon’s desk. He placed the pens and papers where they belongs and even dusted off the computer that no one uses anymore. He spun around on the chair and glanced at the room one more time.

This was the desk where Taekwoon studied at, the chair he sat in, the shelves with books the other read and the bed the vocalist slept on. All of these things represented Taekwoon’s growth. As his eyes scanned around the room and the chair came back to facing the table, he noticed a small notebook with pages still sticking out from it. Hakyeon was about to put the pages back in place so that it doesn’t fall out but he saw a rather familiar title on the corner of the page.

‘My Light.’

This was the song that Taekwoon was working on as his first composition wasn’t it? The song that made Hakyeon blurt out his confession and the song that made Hakyeon realize that his affection for Taekwoon was more than simple attractions. A song in which Hakyeon wished that Taekwoon had written it for him…

As he took the draft of the song from the notebook, he carefully read the scribbles around the page. The lyrics made his heart throb. They were different from the one that VIXX eventually released as a song for all their fans…

Your beautiful silhouette,

Your mesmerizing movements as you danced under the sun that day,

I’ve been blinded by every ounce of your beauty,

That day, in which you became my light.

They were simple lines. Ones that never made it to the actual song but lyrics with impact that was enough to make Hakyeon feel a bit of pain instead. It was as if the lyrics were actually for Hakyeon. At the bottom of the page, was a small scribble, dated ‘2009’.

‘No way…’ Hakyeon gasped.

He couldn’t believe it. Could it have been a coincidence that the year of this draft was the exact same year that Hakyeon entered that dance festival? But how can that be? Just… what does this all mean?

Hakyeon didn’t know what to believe anymore. These lyrics were never once released and no one even knew about it. Yet, these writings were definitely Taekwoon’s. Was this song for Hakyeon all along? But how? Is Hakyeon being too conceited into thinking that he was Taekwoon’s light this entire time?

‘Dammit Jung Taekwoon… why are you doing this to me even now? Stop making me fall for you like this would you? Just… come back already. Please.’ Hakyeon said as he held onto the paper tightly in his arms. ‘I miss you.’

Hakyeon cried and cried. He glanced back at the beautifully written draft of the song and cried some more. He tried to wipe his tears away, he once made a promise to stop his tears but he broke that promise in the end. How can anyone not be moved by these sweet words? As his tears continued to fall, a gentle breeze glazed from behind.

‘I miss you too.’ Someone said.

Hakyeon froze. His heart raced as he heard that familiar tone and voice. He could feel his body trembling as he tried to turn around.

‘Taek…’ He wanted to call out. Am I dreaming?

‘I miss you Hakyeon-ah.’ He said. ‘I’m back. Sorry to have kept you waiting.’

‘Taek-taekwoon-ah!’ Hakyeon’s mind went blank. He rushed to the other and into Taekwoon’s arms. He held the vocalist tightly, never wanting to let go and desperately wishing that this is reality. ‘I’m not dreaming am I? You’re really back?! Please… tell me you’re back.’

Taekwoon smiled.

He leaned down a bit and kissed Hakyeon on the lips gently, then he kissed the older’s tears away from his cheeks and then, his forehead. He ruffled Hakyeon’s hair with his long and cold fingers and pulled Hakyeon in his arms once more.

‘You’re not dreaming anymore. I love you Cha Hakyeon.’ Taekwoon said in an enchanting voice next to Hakyeon’s ears. ‘I’m back.’