‘When is he going to wake up?’ The youngest, Hyuk asked.

‘Why isn’t he waking up? What if-‘

‘Shut it, Hongbin. This isn’t the time to say things like that.’ Jaehwan scolded the boy.

‘Sorry, hyung… but it’s been more than a week! Why hasn’t Hakyeon-hyung awaken yet?’ Hongbin almost cried out. He couldn’t sit still for more than a minute without fidgeting with his hands due to his worries. He watched as his hyung lay still on the hospital bed, without a single sign of even waking up.

‘Even the doctors can’t explain why Hakyeon-hyung hasn’t waken up yet. It’s like… he doesn’t want to wake up or something.’ Wonshik said and immediately took a deep swallow as if he was afraid of such a possibility.

‘Hyung, what do you think? Aren’t you worried for Hakyeon-hyung as well? How can you stay quiet like this? Aren’t the two of you friends?’ Hyuk turned around to ask Taekwoon, who was simply leaning on the wall and watching the younger ones talk amongst themselves around Hakyeon’s bed.

Taekwoon was quiet. As per usual. He was feeling moody and tired.

He’s been busy with his own individual schedules even before Hakyeon’s incident and now, he feels even more tired having to make his way to visit the leader with the rest of the members. He hasn’t slept much nor has he had his meals regularly.

Taekwoon knew that he was not in the mood to say anything and if he did, it would definitely not sound pleasant. Instead, he chose to leave the room leaving the other four who remained inside.

‘Dammit! Does he not care or what?!’ Hongbin yelled loud enough for Taekwoon to hear. He’s frustrated with Taekwoon’s indifferent attitude towards Hakyeon even after witnessing their leader faint.

‘They may be born during the same year but they’re complete bipolar opposites. Taekwoon-hyung is really different from Hakyeon-hyung. We all know that Hakyeon-hyung can be a bit too affection at times but that’s also his good side. A way to show others he cares for them. Seeing Taekwoon-hyung act like this, as if he could care less is a bit irritating,’ Hyuk sighed.

‘I’m sure Taekwoon cares just as much as we do. Let’s not jump to conclusions just yet okay? We’re all tired and you guys all have individual schedules as well. Let’s give all of us some rest and Hakyeon-hyung some room. We’ll come back another day okay?’ Wonshik suggested.

‘I agree. Com’on kids, let’s go before it gets too late.’ Jaehwan rushed the younger ones out of the room and took a final glance at Hakyeon.

‘Please wake up soon hyung. We all miss having you around.’ Jaehwan said as he gently closed the door behind him.

~

It’s not like Taekwoon didn’t care about Hakyeon at all.

He just didn’t know how to express it.

He isn’t like Hakyeon. Taekwoon is Taekwoon.

Taekwoon isn’t the type to hold on to anyone. Rather, he’s the type to easily let go and never look back.

‘Are you okay? Are you getting enough sleep? You should really take a nap. I can wake you up when we arrive at the venue okay?’ His manager suggested.

‘I’m fine.’

‘Whatever you say but we don’t want you to collapse like Hakyeon did.’ His manager sighed.

It’s been almost two weeks since Hakyeon fainted and still, he has yet to show any signs of waking up.

Why are you not waking up? Taekwoon asked as he stared out into the rainy sky that day through the tinted window of the van.

The doctors had neither cure nor treatment for Hakyeon’s situation and eventually the agency had to cancel all of Hakyeon’s remaining schedules until further notice. The press and the fans were in an uproar. All shocked by the sudden news.

The fans were devastated by Hakyeon’s incident. They cried, prayed and prayed even harder as days felt long and dreary.

Fans even made a thread on their official fancafe and leaving messages of hope for Hakyeon to wake up soon. Not just their fans but Hakyeon’s close friends and family were just as worried.

Hakyeon wasn’t just a hyung or leader to the members of VIXX but a great hoobae and sunbae to others in the music industry. He has built a strong relationship with others throughout these years in order to give their group more recognition. Hakyeon’s wish of making the group a trend came true as well.

From one concept to another, Hakyeon constantly boasted about s and the group in front of many people. Some didn’t like it of course but many also saw how genuine the boy Cha Hakyeon was each time he gave a speech after receiving something great from fans.

But now, they were without Hakyeon to lead the group of boys. As time ticked away, the five remaining members grew further apart.

Even when they were invited on music shows or radio, the members felt awkward missing the sixth member in the room. As much as they joked around about ditching Hakyeon behind and going on vacation with just the five of them in the past, they knew that they themselves could not go on a day without their reliable older brother. They remained silent in their waiting room and all were too tired from their own schedules to even talk.

Hakyeon wasn’t there to pester the boys to get ready or there to make sure the young ones were properly groomed before appearing in front of the camera. They were missing their leader.

Without Hakyeon there to guide them, Taekwoon was supposed to lead the group as the second oldest. But he did not know a thing about leading.

Others said he was the leader of VIXX LR when the subunit formed but how much can one actually lead when it’s just two members? And Wonshik was one of the best-behaved members out of everyone in the group. Even Hakyeon would go to Wonshik for advices whenever he needed someone to consult with rather than Taekwoon or Jaehwan who were closer to his age.

Taekwoon didn’t know what it means to lead nor did he have any desire to do so.

‘Dammit Cha Hakyeon. Is this how you’re going to be? Just sleeping there and escaping your responsibilities? Wake up already. I’ve had enough. Do you not know how much the group is falling apart these past few weeks because you’re not there to guide them? The group needs you… I need you.’

Taekwoon secretly went to visit Hakyeon at night after all his schedules have ended. He could have returned to the dorms early to get a few more hours of sleep but instead, he took the remaining time he had to visit Hakyeon alone. He didn’t let other members know nor did he care for others to know.

The younger ones thought Taekwoon didn’t care at all about Hakyeon’s situation but Jung Taekwoon did care. He cared a lot about Hakyeon but he just didn’t know how to express it.

~

Another few days have gone by and eventually everyone was settled on their own individual schedules. It was obvious to their CEO that the five remaining members were not doing so great whenever they were placed together for a show. Even the fans were suspicious that VIXX could be falling apart now that Hakyeon wasn’t there. In order to avoid further rumors from spreading, their agency decided that it was best for the members to do their own schedules for the time being.

Wonshik as per usual was busy in his studio; writing and making the music he loves which he could not do when he’s a part of VIXX. He loved hip-hop and rapping, mix tapes and more but it was obvious that VIXX did not have such a color. He didn’t mind it of course, he loves being a part of VIXX but he also loved doing other things related to music as well. But whenever he thought of Hakyeon still lying there in the hospital bed, he would stop all his work and think back at the times when the two of them would make choreographies together.

Jaehwan have also been busy with appearing on music programs and variety shows. He's made a good name for himself as a greatly skilled singer aside from being an idol. He wasn't just the cute main vocal for nothing but whenever he had to perform a mellow song, he thought back at the times when Hakyeon would applause his singing or even scolded him for making mistakes during their dance practices. He missed Hakyeon a lot more than he thought he would.

Hongbin received a script to audition for a new drama and this time as the second male lead. Hyuk was going to be casted on the big screen as well. Both of the younger ones were venturing out into the acting industry and there was much to learn. They constantly teased Hakyeon whenever they could but they missed their eldest hyung a lot. Hakyeon have always supported the two of them. If they needed someone to listen to their script reading, Hakyeon would be the first one to volunteer and listen. Despite their age differences with their leader, Hakyeon was more like a family, like an older brother that they can always rely on and they were fully aware of how much they were pampered by Hakyeon. They missed being spoiled and pampered.

Taekwoon on the other hand, was also trying to compose music of his own. He tried to write new lyrics for a new song but the words did not come out. Every time his pen reached down onto the paper, he would freeze and not know how to continue. He tried looking back at his previous songs in order to remember the feelings he had during the times he wrote them but he could not recall. The only thing that was on his mind now was his lifelong friend, the one who he turned away regretfully, Cha Hakyeon.

He pushed away Hakyeon so many times that even he knew he was being too harsh. But what could he do? He didn’t feel comfortable with Hakyeon’s affections and when the two of them became a bit more distant, Taekwoon really thought he would finally have the peace he longed for. But he was wrong. He missed the warmth that Hakyeon could give him because no one else did.

Though there were times he would appreciate a bit of distant from Hakyeon, he did not expect Hakyeon to suddenly collapse and be sent to the hospital like this. Taekwoon still remembers the horror of the moment when he heard the younger ones shouting for Hakyeon’s name from behind him. And as he turned to see what was going on, it was already too late.

Hakyeon have always help himself up rather strongly no matter how tired or painful he felt. Taekwoon recalls the time when Hakyeon had a major waist injury during Eternity comeback yet would still continue to perform on stage in front of everyone while hiding his injury. Taekwoon and Hongbin even had to assist him off the stage or help him keep his balance during the performance.

Taekwoon helped Hakyeon out before, he cared about Hakyeon but where did that caring Taekwoon go?

‘Guys! Wake up!’ Their manager shouted throughout the dorms, knocking on each one of their bedroom doors.

It was a day in which all the members were finally getting some rest at the same time after their hectic schedules. The members barely saw one another despite living under the same roof though. By the time one member got back to the dorm, the others would be sleeping in their individual rooms or like Wonshik; he would sleep in his studio instead.

‘What’s wrong hyung?’ Jaehwan came out of his room first.

One by one the boys finally gathered. It’s been awhile since they’ve seen one another’s faces.

‘The hospital just called. Hakyeon woke up!’

The half-asleep boys immediately awakened from the good news.

‘Get dressed. We’re going to the hospital to see him okay?’ The manager said.

The boys were excited. They were relieved. It’s been months since the incident and visiting Hakyeon was their schedule today.

~

Along with their manager, the five boys rushed to the hospital to visit their beloved leader. They missed Hakyeon so much. They couldn’t wait to hear his voice again.

As the manager slide open the bedroom door carefully, they saw the doctor and a nurse surrounding Hakyeon’s bed.

‘I heard our Hakyeon is awake?’ The manager asked.

‘Indeed he is.’ The doctor moved out of the way for the boys to finally see Hakyeon again.

Hakyeon was obediently sitting on the bed in order for the doctor to give him a check up.

‘Hey.’ Hakyeon greeted him with a rather weak smile. He just woke up after all.

‘Hyung!’ Hyuk cried out immediately as he saw Hakyeon awake. He didn’t think he would cry at all. But he was still just a boy inside no matter how much he tried to grow up.

One by one, the boys gathered around Hakyeon’s bed and Taekwoon joined them as well. He wanted to make sure that he wasn’t hallucinating. That Hakyeon was finally awake and well.

‘How are you feeling…’ Taekwoon asked.

Hakyeon looked a bit surprised at Taekwoon for a moment. He was silent at first and his response came in rather late.

‘I’m fine.’

Taekwoon was relieved. So was everyone else.

Hakyeon was dismissed from the hospital eventually but was required to come back every week for a check up to make sure everything was all right. After all, he has been unconscious for months now.

With Hakyeon awake now, Taekwoon wanted to change himself.

It was hard but he knew he had to.

He was well aware of his cold and distant attitude towards Hakyeon and how much he had hurt the latter because of it. Taekwoon was afraid of the same thing happening again, afraid of the possibility of losing Hakyeon.

Taekwoon was willing to change. He was willing to change for Cha Hakyeon but is Hakyeon ready to accept that change?