Dance into the Fire

~*~

I remember a time

Oh so long ago

Where I did not recognise anything

Where I should have died

~*~

Prologue

~.~

The Festival of Fire was running loud and clear with its usual jollities and fragranced air that made the world feel alive and untouchable to sorrow or discontent as dancers twirled about beautifully, entertainers sprang back and forth with stories and songs that engaged the little ones with wonder and excitement and the air was filled with the sweet smells of sugary treats and deep gallons of soups and stews that were used to help welcome the ending of the winter months with praise to the fiery god of the sun who would come to warm the land once again and bring life back to the planet of Matoki. It was an ancient tradition, one that had stood the test of time and would probably never fade from the forefront of every single person’s mind on the planet.

Normally Himchan would enjoy this festival but tonight it felt like nothing more than a passing of time that was too brightly lit for it to even be real. He hated himself for it because he knew that his life was not over and that there was a road out of the colossal mess which he had found himself in but Himchan just did not know what to do with the offer that had been made.

It made no sense to him in the slightest, he was a man of no prospects who had come from the very fringes of society and other than the fact that he had been born with the ability to carry a child within his body there was next to nothing that he could offer. No name, no title, no land, no family.

However, there was someone out in this big wild world of inconsistencies and trickery that wanted nothing more than to hold him, love him and make him feel like his life was not forfeited to the ranks of the unclean who sold themselves on the street corners in the hopes that they would be able to survive another day.

Himchan didn’t believe that he was deserving of that love, that he even deserved a second chance at the life which had been upon him without his real knowledge of consent and it was one of the many reasons why he was walking away from the festivities and coming to stand on a bridge that overlooked a quietly flowing river which he had worked out ran directly to the place where he had grown up all those years ago. His dark eyes stared out at the waters, wondering if they would convey his soiled reputation back to the townsfolk who had despised him and pulled the plain cotton headscarf closer to his body in an attempt to hide his face from the world.

Gone were the fine silks and high class cotton that he had been dressed in for the last year, gone was the makeup and the specially scented perfumes that made his skin enticing and glistening. He was back in a very plain cotton robed hanbok which had somehow managed to survive coming all the way to the Capitol with him and was hiding himself away from the prying eyes of everyone because he was the unclean, soiled monster who had played the heart of a man who was too dangerous to go against.

Or at least that was what the vicious whispers would say about him, even though deep down in his soul Himchan knew that he was the one whom had been wronged.

As he stared at the flowing water, a sigh escaped his lips and the sounds of crinkling paper caught his attention. Looking around he saw nothing until he felt into a concealed pocket of his robe where there was indeed a piece of paper. It turned out to be a yellow envelope with black writing that had been especially done in blue ink and it was sealed with the mark of a star. Himchan blinked, trying to remember when he had received this fortune envelope and then vaguely recalled the old Speaker in his home town who had presented it to him on the day he left. A half smile formed on the plump lips as he cast his eyes over the words before a slight chill ran down his spine.

Read on the day when you stand by the river full of misery and guilt unneeded

Blinking lightly, Himchan could only find it in himself to gulp worriedly as he turned the envelope over and finally broke the seal with shaking fingers. The fortune itself was written neatly on a piece of long blue paper that reminded him of the spring festivals when expectant mothers were given origami gifts but his mind was not focused on that fact as he read the words of the fortune which had been given to him so long ago.

Little blighted lamb

Hold true to your actions

Wrong not you have committed

Except not looking with your eyes

See now what was blinded

Look at honesty and trust

For those we love the most

Take a difficult path to reach us

Innocence stolen but not fully taken

Trust to the instincts of old

See the heart that was broken

Kiss the lips so longed for

Confusion rippled through Himchan for a moment as he reread the words again only to reflect on whose lips he had longed for longer than he had Prince Zico’s. For a moment he could think of no one and then a memory stirred that shook his to the core.

Before he could think any further on it, there came an echo of a firm boot hitting the wood of the bridge and Himchan turned in surprise, not realising that his covering had fallen back a little to expose his identity. Though the warm relieved smile that greeted his line of vision was of a man whom did not need to physically see him to know exactly who he was and the just taller man approached quietly, like one would approach a frightened kitten.

“Thank goodness,” Yongguk whispered as he reached out to touch Himchan’s visible cheek, “I feared that I had lost you for good then.”

Himchan could only stare at Yongguk in shock and surprise before he found himself recalling everything that had happened before and after he had laid eyes on the man now standing straight in front of him with a look of pure happiness radiating off him in waves the likes of which Himchan had only felt in dreams. He realised for the first time he was looking at someone who was completely in love with the person that they were staring at and tears immediately began to pool into Himchan’s eyes.

Because for the first time in his life, he knew that he was completely the object of this man’s desires and he had very nearly thrown it all away for the sake of a promise which would have never come true.

authors babbling: just done a little editing and tidying up on a couple of paragraphs. Nothing major though. Should hopefully be back on track with this now that I have free time again