NeA/N - Ha ha ah a lot of you won't like me after this chapter! I always appreciate all of the feedback in the comments, thank you very much for giving this story a chance and I hope you've enjoyed reading it as much as I've enjoyed writing it.

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Autumn, 2016

"Hey, Jimbo, why the face? Is your mom being a again-"

"No." The boy who was playing with his food for a few minutes now in Taehyung's mother's restaurant responded with as the other was staring at the television and munching away on his dinner.

"Dude, what the hell, you've begged me to come see you for so long, but now you're so down..." Taehyung spoke, irritated at the other's quietness, chewing on lamb in between.

"Tae, I'm gay." The boy said as Taehyung turned to him wide eyed and started choking on his lamb, but after a while calming down and spitting the meat onto a napkin.

"- I know that kind of rhymed and it was sort of funny, but this is real life - stop choking."

"What the ?"

"Yeah-"

"-You like men? You like any sort of people?" 

"Well that's just unnecessary, I'm alright." Jimin frowned ever so slightly at his best friend.

"To me, sure. Hoseok too, maybe. You stand Yugyeom...that's it for your ‘humans I can stand’ list."

"I have lots of friends-"

"Friends...you know a lot of people, you don't have a lot of friends, and you’re a hard nut. I swear, you hated your ex-girlfriend too."

"Gee! Wonder why!?" Jimin asked sarcastically making Taehyung raise his eyebrows then lowered them, shaping his mouth into an 'o'.

"You didn't even have to come out to me, I'm crazy accepting and like that. You're my best friend, we'll never be weird. Well, unless you're in love with me or something-" Taehyung teased with a wide grin, causing the other to hide himself away and intertwine his arms, looking down at the food instead of his friend.

“I’m not.” Jimin felt uncomfortable, shifting his eyes away from his friend.

"I'm just kidding..." Taehyung whispered as he put his chopsticks down only to attempt to attack his best friend with a hug, just so that he could be pushed away not even a second into the attempt, ah things were still normal between them. The man can't imagine Jimin wishing to hold anyone's hand and cuddle them, let alone another boy like him. Jimin was the furthest thing from gentle, so Taehyung thought he'd end up with a gentle girl that would change him.
 

"ing, gross. You're the first person I've come out to, I feel really weird. I mean, since, you're cool, but, I know that other people will react differently. I don't really want to tell anyone else, just like, run away and move to the moon and not see people ever. I feel so alone. Like this big monster of a secret that I have has to be announced with everyone I know." Jimin admitted, making Taehyung finally realize how important this was to him. 

"Well, to help you, I guess, uh, I like both, you know." Taehyung spoke as he ate, causing Jimin to get lost in thought to what he might be referring to.

"...You're bi or ?" Jimin asked sheepishly as Taehyung merely shrugged. The boy didn't pay much attention to who he was attracted to, no matter who it is, he'll be too shy to chat them up, focusing on work and not dating and causing a scandal would be his best focus now. Truthfully he wishes to marry a nice girl and bring his mother the grandkids she wants and make everyone happy.

"I prefer girls but... I don't know. I like taking care of people, like, okay, I know what you're gonna say, but, Jungkook for instance, I always felt like I had to protect him and sometimes I'd day dream about us dating, or whatever, whatever, it doesn't- but yeah. Now, he's pretty scary...but um, anyway, it's stupid-"

"- He's hot."

"Oh thank God, I know. Woof." Taehyung added on, causing the other to cackle.

"A man of mistery... I guess. Well, speaking of which, did you know he went to Busan for uni?" 

"Yeah, I've been digging back into his life slowly, and just as soon as he let me in he left. I don't know, it feels pretty ty, he's a great guy, I really wish that we don't let sit for so long. I really wish he does well in life. I kind of regret…not…being more forceful and like trying harder with him. I know I’m rambling, but um, sometimes, you just up and life goes on…mh. I guess that’s what happened with our friendship. I guess, I grew tired of trying so so hard with him. He’s so…thick minded…and difficult.”

"You think that?"

"I, people, we grow up..and realize.. that we need to change ourselves and that we've been bad people. I think that's fine. God, we did some absolutely vile things to that guy. That guy...he's just that guy, when I could've been his friend all this time. Hah.." Maybe even something more, Taehyung thought to himself, not speaking the last few words out loud.  A deadly silence only broken by the wrestling match on the television engulfed the restaurant.

That boy really did come once in a life time, for all the countless times Jungkook reached out to anyone in the class, anyone who'd look his way, Jimin would make sure to be the one to push him on the ground and slap the hand away. Whenever Jimin barely gave any indications of a struggle and his friends weren't there to save him, Jungkook would be there.

The night went on and eventually it came near closing time and his parents did close late, but they always served the last customer even though they came one minute before closing time, which was a business model to Taehyung. That's what they were known for, it attracted weirdoes, but weirdoes were business too.

The two were just about to lock up before they heard the door opening, which caused Taehyung to roll his eyes since he had to stay until every last customer was out. The boy got up and dragged his half asleep body across the restaurant to see a familiar, seemingly tired as well faced man that he swears he's seen before.

The much younger boy was there with two other men who were chatting while the younger leaned into the man yelling loudly at his friend as they ordered some alcohol, saying they'll be leaving soon.

"Jiminie.." Taehyung whispered to his friend as he came back to sit behind the counter.

"Mh?"

"I don't know if we should call the cops, or if I'm overreacting but that man with them is definitely drugged out of his mind. He’s just not ing there." The brunette whispered to the other, which caused Jimin to furrow his eyebrows and assess the situation himself.

"They're men! That's what they do, you know? It's just a night out." Jimin spoke casually as he chewed on a handful of crisps and watched the television.

"What if instead of the out of his clear mind guy it was a girl? You'd say something else, tch. I can't believe it." Taehyung told the boy who frowned in response.

"It's her fault for getting drunk or whatever with them." The boy responded while not loosing focus from the late night television, Taehyung had to think of something on his own. The man thought up the stupidest bluff he could, went up to the two and assured them that he would call the cops unless they leave and leave without the intoxicated man, or whatever he was. He did that and thankfully they didn't fight with him but walked away simply. It could've gone much worse, thankfully they were cowards. Taehyung slapped away the hands trying to fight his way into grabbing the drugged out male's wallet but, he needed to see his I.D.

"Min Yoongi... who are you?" Taehyung couldn't remember for the life of him. The boy threatened to call the cops a few times, but the man sitting down in pain refused, yet he couldn't stand up. Only after Taehyung promised he wouldn't call the cops but instead let him sleep in the restaurant did he calm down enough to soothe himself to fall asleep in the sitting position. After a dozen or so minutes of Taehyung staring at the male, trying to figure out what to do, his agitated friend came to see what the hell was keeping them from leaving.

"What's going on? I'm so tiiired." Jimin asked, as Taehyung proceeded to describe what had happened.

"Just call the ing cops on him, tell them he won't leave." Jimin said as he saw the face of a man he already knew.

"I should, shouldn’t I? Ah, no, I can’t. Dude, we can't just- I told him I won't do that."

"Oh, as if that mess, understood you. Just chuck him on the street, he's a bum, look at him." Jimin responded and crossed his arms in mixed emotions of jealousy and anger, thunder and rain hitting the pavement and the rooftop outside of the restaurant as he pretends not to hear. He had overheard Taehyung wonder out loud for the identity of this boy, Jimin knows exactly who he is.

"Come on, grab his torso and I'll grab his legs, let's get him to the guest bedroom. He seems like he's been through a lot, he's young as well." Taehyung spoke with pity, and after a few minutes of pursuing Jimin to do it, the boy reluctantly agreed to his friends plea, simply carrying the lightweight man by himself, the man that was by this point completely knocked out and unresponsive.

“Jungkook and you are the same, way too nice, it’ll get you nowhere.” Jimin mumbled to himself, sounding like his mother more and more, but Taehyung already left him.

The boy dropped the man on the bed and left to sleep in Taehyung's bed, since the guest room was now taken by the gross, scummy, ugly male that he never wants to see again. The man that stole Jungkook's love from him, he doesn't wish to see ever again.

A month later

“Hello sir, may I get your order?” Yoongi asked the handsome man sitting alone at his table, trying to ignore his teary eyes and pretend they’re not there.

“Um, just a latte.”

“I’ll be right back.” Yoongi responded with, heading to get the order, but he was stopped by the man, again.

“Um, do, can you give me the biggest piece of cake you can and like a chocolate donut…can it also be the biggest one you have?” The man asked and Yoongi politely smiled and ensured him he could. After a couple of minutes the waiter brought everything he ordered on the man’s table. He finished it off quickly and asked for a burger and fries.

“Not to pry but, sir, did you have a bad day?” Yoongi asked since he was ordering huge amounts of food on a Wednesday morning that the restaurant was empty besides him and a grandpa sitting in the corner reading newspapers.

“I just, I keep murdering my boyfriends.” The man dropped a bomb, almost stopping Yoongi's heart from ticking, but he put on a fake smile either way.

"Ah.. I see." Yoongi tried to be nonchalant so that he lives to see another day.

“I just. I can’t be sad anymore. Two of my boyfriends have been doing the same job. My boyfriend right now has just been shot so near the artery he could’ve died. He still won’t stop doing what he does, despite the dangers, I don’t know what to do. It’s actually life and death at this point. All because of ing money.” The man threw a lot at Yoongi as he apologized and politely asked him to sit down, as he introduced himself to be Seok Jin.

“Ultimatum. “

“Huh?”

“An ultimatum is the only way to go. When I was given an ultimatum by someone I love, I knew I needed to change or else I lose everything.” Yoongi spoke truthfully to the man.

“Are you with them, or are they still around?”

“No, they left… it’s okay. Sometimes, people are too good and they move on. Don’t move on from him, he probably loves you and … is hurting in his own way. Sometimes, it’s tough love that does it.”

"So, did you change for that person?"

"Na, I didn't want to change back then. Now, I'm in love with yet another, but I won't contact him until I change. I don't like myself, the way things are, you know?"

"Mm."

“We’ve been together for a year and he never said he loved me. But, thanks.” Jin spoke, disappointed at his own self as he picked the crumbs on his plate.

“Yeah, men are like that.” Yoongi said as he stood up to serve a new customer.

X

“Namjoon-ah! Come here right now or I’m breaking up with you!” Jin yelled into a call with Namjoon as he turned his phone off and tossed it on the bed. As he sat on his sofa, staring into nothingness, he heard a doorbell a few moments later. Jin unlocked the door and let Namjoon in, the man who didn’t know what the hell was happening, just seeing his boyfriend incredibly angry.

“Listen to me! I don’t care, what you think of this but I won’t let you die! “ Jin screamed at the top of his lungs, clearly breaking apart, but Namjoon didn’t even bother to take his hands out of his jean pockets.

“I’m sorry, but, if you don’t stop doing what you do… I don’t see a future where we are possible.” The man made his final statement. "And, I'm not sorry!" He corrected himself. The one that he found so tough to get out of him. The man that is throwing a fit, clearly looked shook up and distressed, but his boyfriend’s poker face and stone cold demeanor never left him, the man just sat on the sofa and covered his mouth with his hand, figuring out what to say to the older to calm him down.

“Where’s all of this coming from?” Namjoon asked, since Jin never told him he felt like this before. Only ting on his career, but never to this extent.

“A very small waiter with blond hair told me I need to stand up for myself!”

“My job doesn’t affect you, nobody knows you to keep you protected, is that what you’re mad about? About us not being too pda and public?”

“No, I don’t care what others think, you big, dumb, oaf. And you don’t always know the best.”

“You’re just mad now, you need to cool down a bit and then-“

“No! No way! How I feel matters. If you don’t think so, ing walk out.”

“Don’t you care about me at all?” Namjoon asked as he looked up at the man. Receiving a pissed off look.

“I love you more than I’ve ever loved anyone. You’re a piece of , you don’t even deserve me. You’re just a loser.” Jin said calmly, not regretting his words that he probably will later. His boyfriend exhaled deeply at that and nodded to himself, taking it all in.

“Well, yeah. I agree. “ The man with a stubble spoke to the man that will absolutely be an angel in his eyes until the day he dies, the one standing in front of him. He worked way too much, way too late, they barely saw each other, but when they did it was one of the greatest times of his life.

“Maybe it’s better if we separate-” Jin just spoke whatever came to his mind, seeing if Namjoon would agree to it or disagree.

“I -I want to spend the rest of my life with you, but I thought you’d be fine with what I do, yet I guess I always sensed you weren’t, so I never confessed.” Namjoon said as Jin knelt before him and grabbed his hands.

“I don’t need the fancy overpriced presents and out of country trips that you can give me. I’d rather us go to the seaside together for a vacation and get a stupid, worthless teddy bear for Valentine’s Day instead of a diamond statue or my Chinese horoscope, Joon. Which was unnecessary. Your presents aren’t why I’m with you. You do know that?” Jin asked as he rubbed the manly man’s hands and stared up at him, not knowing what will be his reaction.

“Without my job, I’m nothing.” Namjoon whispered while Jin the buzzcut side of his boyfriend’s head.

“Then, you’ll become someone and get a new job and you’ll live until you turn seventy, more importantly.“ Jin said as Namjoon leaned back in the sofa, avoiding to break down. Jin didn’t know it would be such a big deal, but careers often define men the most.

“I wanted to be a musician, before, you know? I wanted to make people happy and inspire kids... like you’re doing.” Namjoon spoke as his lip quivered, startling Jin with a sign of actual emotion coming from the man he loved.

“But dreams don’t come true so you just find the best way to make the most money, without a degree and every person you’ve ever loved hates what you do. What do I do then, Jin?” You push them out because love comes second and a sense of purpose comes first, Namjoon thought to himself.

“You can only have one, I understand if you don’t want that one to be me.” Jin said understandingly, sitting next to the man. He wasn't a high schooler that would kill themselves over someone they cared for, he's grown up now and he shouldn't stand for bull anymore. If he wishes to have his career over him, the door is right there, he doesn't have to stay. 

“No, no, I won’t repeat the process again. I won’t choose my work over love again. What’s the point of living your entire life building this empire of …nothing? Just, money. You only get one lifetime to love who you’re supposed to love and cherish them- ” The man spoke with a sigh in between.

“But what about those kids, I kept them fed I gave them the clothes on their backs-“

“- Hyung will help them. Chanwoo will enroll in school again, he said, if the kids bully him that it doesn’t matter since he’ll get Bobby and Hanbin hyung to beat them up later, which slightly worries yet comforts me.” Jin spoke trying to make light of the situation.

“I love you so much, I love you I love you.” Jin spoke, kissing him in between each I love you, not expecting anything in return just wishing to say it out loud, almost as if he snapped Namjoon from his trans.

“Oh, yeah, I love you too.” Namjoon said casually as he made Jin’s smile drop.

“Huh?” Jin asked, thinking he didn’t hear what he just heard.

“What?”

“You love me?” Jin asked as Namjoon pulled out his most expression filled confused look.

“Duh.” 

Winter, 2018

Jungkook was looking through the glass at his family's ashes, next to them is a copy of his high school diploma and the copy of his university diploma right next to it. The boy won't be staying here for much longer, Korea that is. He's had enough of it. There is no happiness here for anyone, not for him, not for the ones he loves. Jungkook stopped crying years ago, his family is something he barely remembers now, sometimes he even stares at his own reflection. The reality of the matter is that slowly you realize that there is no point in living while dwelling on the people in the past, you have to detach yourself from everyone, only then you will be happy. By yourself. Live by yourself and die by yourself or else you'll be a miserable .

As Jungkook had passed to stand in front of the second cremated loved on placed behind glass for an eternity. He had begged for him and his parents, practically, when their time comes to be placed here and how he loved him dearly, so that he can visit him as much as he visits his parents. The boy's graduation certification sat inside as well.

"Kookie, ready to go?"

"Yeah." Taehyung nodded in response and the two headed out.

1, 2, 3, 4, 5 people in Jungkook's life had died. One, two, three, four, five. 

His family, the girl in his class, the boy in his class. All of it seemed as if it happened just yesterday. Every day he thinks about one, two, three, four, five.

"Tae, would you be mad if I left Korea for good?" 

"Oh...it's not my business, really. Would you ever come back to visit? I'll miss you."

"Of course." Jungkook finished speaking because he would absolutely burst into tears and Taehyung could hear it in his voice. The boy searched for any way to leave and there was finally a window opened after graduating. Although, he will still go for his bachelors and doctorat, but just not in South Korea, not anymore.

Park Jimin, how is it up there?  Jungkook had asked himself, thinking that the stars shine brighter during the nights he visits Seoul. Maybe he's a guardian angel now, or perhaps a star. Maybe neither.  Hopefully he shines as bright as he did during his time on earth. Even more than that, since the boy feels that Jimin never got the chance to be himself, too busy being angry and sad at the world and at his life, hopefully in Heaven he found his place, his peace.

The angels amongst the stars that keep you company won't be as cruel as the demons walking this earth.

Maybe. Jungkook thought. 

  X

When Taehyung and Jungkook arrived to his family's restaurant his mother served them dishes with pity in her eyes, but Jungkook was used to it so he didn't care.

"Yoongi?" Jungkook asked the back of the waiter fixing the cash register, the man turned around, thinking it was a regular customer who knew his name.

"Oh, hey...what are you doing here?" The taken aback older male was easily not freaking out at the situation, the man was simply caught off guard. Jungkook had asked Taehyung for a brief moment of privacy with the man. The two went to talk in the park nearby, awkward tension surrounding them as they walked, even after they've both sat down on a park bench to talk, or sit next to eachother in silence.

When they sat down, Yoongi put his hand down his trouser pocket and pulled out a folded over green piece of paper that didn't ring a bell in Jungkook's mind. The man didn't unfold the paper but instead took Jungkook's wrist and placed the piece of paper on his palm, then shifting himself to stare in front of himself at the beautiful park day instead.

"You can leave for good now." 

"What?" Jungkook asked, then afterwards proceeded to unfold the piece of paper that semeed to be folded around eight times, after seeing what was written on it he swallowed his spit and nodded his head.

"I see...you're mad at me, I p-presume."

"I don't have time for this. Just, go back and eat, then leave forever." Yoongi stated, ignoring the question.

"I would've left either way. Would it be better if I left you with a n-note dripping with l-l-ovey dovey bull, just, bulldozing over you so that you feel like you missed out..on something.. ? I could've been fake and w-wrote some ty song lyrics after thinking about them for days and just make you feel so great, then so ty for the longest time."

"Yes. That would've been better." The boy responded with, causing Jungkook to bite back a remark since he was acting unreasonable to the maximum.

"Listen, you're okay now. You're good. I knew you'd be good. Well, I didn't. You couldn't've depended on me so much and I could've been your white knight le-leverage, your crutch for the rest of your life. Do you want that?"  Jungkook asked and the boy didn't respond. "I didn't want you to depend on me...that's ed up. That's why people go off the walls. I knew that I had to be a complete and pretend that I absolutely couldn't ing care less for you." Yoongi heard the word pretend and gripped onto the cloth that covered his knees tighter as he listened.

"All the time I've been infatuated with you was because I liked your looks, I didn't see the person beneath that. You were just a beautiful object without any purpose, past, nor future. All of that w-w-while you helped to hold me while I took my first steps, held the bycickle after I took off my training wheels and guided me into adulthood like a caretaker would. I was selfish. Matter of fact, I'm s-selfish for not leaving right now, like you've asked." Jungkook had admitted, giving so much information after such a long period of time, that Yoongi absolutely quivered in his seat, all of the emotions coming back to him.

"What the hell are you still here for then? Go back to Busan."

"I'm not going back there. I'm here for a direct flight departing from Seoul, actually." Yoongi felt a knife being stabbed through his chest.

"ing go wherever the hell you need to. You're still an . Of course you haven't changed, because you're just ing perfect, just leave me  like you've left three years ago, without anything to remember you by, not even trying to contact me through texts, just disappear like you've never known me!" Yoongi was at this point causing a scene in the park, feeling like a woman from a drama that's losing the only man she's ever loved. Jungkook sighed deeply in response as he pulled out two pieces of paper out of his coat pocket and placed them on the older's lap.

"What is this?" Yoongi asked as he flipped over the tickets, looking at Jungkook for a second, but looking away too quickly to see a response. The man placed the tickets closer to his face to read them easier.

"New York? You're going to New York? With who?" Yoongi asked, eyes wider than ever.

"Ugh! Don't make me say it. It's for us!" Jungkook yelled at him, Yoongi's eyebrows scrunched together as he slammed the tickets into Jungkook's chest and stared at him like he's crazy.

"You're crazy!" 

"I thought it w-would be cute to choose to find a job over there since you said you wanted to visit there once!"

"Once four years ago, we didn't even know each other for a month! You belong to a looney bin! Do you know how much these cost?!" 

"Duh! I paid for them!"

"Even if I go, which I won't, It would mean you spending another like, billion won to ship me the back here." Yoongi complained, Jungkook grew more irritated that you could even see it on his face.

"You don't go back here! You have nothing here!"

"Where do I go?!"

"Wi-with me! Forever- or u-un-until you get sick of me, I guess!" Jungkook stated, feeling as if he's buying a slave for the trip over to New York, which wasn't the best thing, but he was left thinking he calmed the situation a little bit but fooling himself since he felt his bicep being punched by the male who got up on his knees on the bench, Jungkook grabbed his wrists and crossed his arms, overpowering him.

"I didn't know I'd be trying to get back together with a psycho! I thought it would be cute!" Jungkook said to the older, looking at his eyes, feeling the same butterflies as all those years ago. 

"You want to take an old worn out e across the boarder while you probably pay for all of my living expenses since I can't speak a word of English?" Yoongi asked and Jungkook told him, staring directly at him and releasing his arms. "Yes. You are a waiter by the way. Or a cash register fixer person, I don't know. You're not who you were in the past. Shut the up." Yoongi opened his mouth to say something but Jungkook covered it with his palm.

"Shut the up." The male stated, quickly removing his hand to his side.

"I want us t-to get to know each other in New York and if you hate me so much when you get to know me, you can go back. Please?" 

".. Why me though?"

"I don't need another angel watching over me, I want you to be right next to me. I want to have a family with you in the States, no matter which state, I can get a job, it's not an issue. The only loose factor is if you're willing." Jungkook spoke with his heart, not mentioning how he wants to adopt a dozen kids when they get there either, that is something he'll have to ease him into. He already had his heart resting at the fact that Jin and Namjoon helped and volunteered for the orphanage that Jungkook used to stay in, which warmed his heart greatly and put his soul at rest for his business in Seoul. They were still on good terms. Yoongi could only scoff at the words.

"Darling I'm no angel and if you ever try pulling anything like this ever again, I'll find you myself whereever you are, chop your off and fling it off of the statue of liberty."  Yoongi stated after which Jungkook grabbed the side of his neck to pull him closer and bump his head across the smaller male's temple. "I know." Jungkook stated as he kissed his cheek a couple of times, causing Yoongi to become unable to hide his smile while he pushed him away at the same time. On the walk to the restaurant the duo kissed for the second time in their life, proving that daylight doesn't work in their favour since it was a much sloppier and messier task that caused with the two laughing too hard to continue.

X

"I hope that I learn..how to mature more..and how to take care of an angel so that you don't fly away from me like all the other angels had." Jungkook whispered, laying in Yoongi's twin sized bed, the two boys were being cringey for a few days before heading off to New York, holding hands in their bed, not getting up for more than half of a day, the older quit his waitering job with his friends' Taehyung's mother.

"I'm not an angel. You are." Yoongi spoke back as he stared into the other's intense eyes that pierced any cloaks pulled over them by the night, just like right now.

"Untrue."

"Mm..are there more angels then?"

"Yeah.  I think they're all watching us now...your mom is an angel too..just like mine." Jungkook spoke, Yoongi noticed he often mentioned death, the afterlife, angels, heaven, religion... he'd never point it out, since religion and believing that angels exist comforted the youth. The angels weren't really angels at all, just people that passed. Whenever the boy said that someone needed one or perhaps was becoming one, he'd actually mean to say how he's scared of their passing, or thought they were going to die any moment. Just like Yoongi.

"I'll never leave you, baby. Don't worry about it. I won't ever leave." Yoongi whispered, brushing his acne scarred skin with the back of his knuckles, gently as feathers falling and gliding down his face. The boy didn't respond, not even realizing until now that that is all he has been afraid of. People he loves leaving him with nothing. Jimin's parents had asked him what he would like to take to remember him by, but he refused anything. The boy realized that it would be pointless, he will never forget the ones he loved and instead of being with someone, paranoid about them leaving, Jungkook will try to appreciate and love them in the moment of them being there, but after they leave he will think of only the good times and the love they shared during those times, anything but that was pointless.

"Mhh..." Jungkook mumbled into the smaller's chest, causing the other to scrunch his entire face at the boy who had nothing to say.