To Make Matters Worse
A Beautiful Mess
Typhoon and I got back to the apartment about an hour and half after leaving. Jaejoong walked us back and left without setting foot in the building. I understood. He was running after time. Like me... he wanted to make the most of the time he had left: him and Jooeun, me and Yunho.
I took Typhoon's leash off and he immediately ran to his water bowl. I tucked the leash into the side cabinet drawer, took my shoes off and laid myself down on the sofa. I thought about what Jaejoong had said. I thought about what Jooeun would say. I thought about what Yunho would think.
I didn't know if I was supposed to tell Yunho I met Jaejoong. I couldn't decide. I was afraid of what he'd think... what he'd say. Jaejoong kind of implied that he had something for me. I couldn't shake it off. I felt like crap. It was a mixture of pressure and confusion... but not the exam type of pressure-confusion. It was one of those feelings that weren't painful but so damn irritating you'd want to cut off whatever body part was bugging you.
My thoughts were disturbed by the familiar tune of my ringtone. I grabbed the device from my jean pocket. Halmuni was calling.
Halmuni... is the awesome-est grandmother ever. Since my grandfather died, she's been using a cellphone to keep in contact with the outside world. It wasn't long until she got addicted to it. Halmuni is also a car enthusiast. It was quite ironic since she only had one ride: Debbie the Ford E-150
“Halmuni! You're back? How are you?” I greeted her.
“No, no, sweetie. How are you?” Her tone was intriguing. It looks like the whole town knows... I will kill Yoochun the moment I see him. “Come by tomorrow. Spend some time with me and your brother here. He's been cuckoo-cuckoo since you got back from Haeundae.”
“Of course, Halmuni! I'll be there!” I announced into the cellphone.
“I? Take your boyfriend with you! Spend the night here. Maybe two nights. That boy owes me a ride in his car.” Halmuni said. “Ooh! Gotta go, darling. Yoochun's burning the bulgogi. Bye! See you!”
I dropped the phone with a smile on my face. If Halmuni likes Yunho, so should everybody else!
Oh god. My parents... they don't know yet. I haven't received a call from in ages. Whenever we do get to talk they'd always blabber about great Hawaii is or how awesome their cruise in the Bahamas was. A two-month long second honeymoon was like their way of disowning me and Yoochun for a while. I couldn't squeeze in the tiny fact that I have found love in the arms of a childhood friend.
My parents loved Yunho even though he made me cry a lot when we were little. He was like their second son. He was everybody's second son, actually. His parents loved him to death. He was so responsible, so polite and so kind; at least when the grown-ups were around.
Mr. and Mrs. Jung are at Gwangju now. They left Seoul to find peace and quiet there. If a villa on top of a hill was what it took, so be it. Yunho barely visits them due to his schedule. I wanted to give them call but was too afraid to. I didn't want to disturb them. Peace and quiet, remember?
“Sunmi!?” I was called.
I shot up from the couch. Yunho briskly walked across the floor, jumped over the couch and knelt before me. “Ta-da!” he pulled out a manila envelope.
“What's this?” I asked curiously.
“The picture that got me another exhibit.” he proudly replied. “Go on. Look.”
I lifted the flap and pulled out the 8-by-11 photo. It was one of those pictures we took on our first day at Haeundae. It was a candid medium close up of my side profile. I had my earphones on, a hint of my bikini top was showing and it looked like I was watching something very closely. The sun shone right above my head, creating a bright glint of sparkle.
“Do I have your permission to use it?” Yunho sat next to me and placed his chin on my shoulder.
“It's beautiful. It's... gorgeous.” I stumbled for words. I just couldn't believe he used this photo to convince the gallery people to take him. Me? A photo of me? I wasn't a model. I'm just... me. He once told me he preferred random people to take photos of. 'It's more natural that way', he says. 'It's real and pure.' “You... have my full consent.” I finally agreed even though I still didn't have a clue as to why he's using the picture.
“Thank you!” he beamed and gave me a quick kiss. “Hey. You wouldn't mind if I kept this, would you?” He took out a playing card-sized picture from his pocket and waved it.
I grabbed the photo from him. I barely caught a glimpse of it when he grabbed it back. I pushed him onto his back, crawled over him and reached for the photo as he raised his arm and dodged my grip; not caring if I'd find myself in an odd position later on.
“What in the heck is this?! When did you take this?!” I demanded. It was another picture of me. This time, I was lying on the sand in my black and white striped bikini. It looked like a cross between a Sports Illustrated photo and a candid at Us Weekly.
“I kind of stalked you. You walked along the shore at 8 in the morning one of those days at Busan.” Yunho replied in a muffled, bragging voice. “Please don't move. I really like where I'm at right now.” I looked down at him from the picture. His face was right in the middle of my chest and my knee was resting against his inner thigh. “Kree-vidge...” he mumbled.
“ert.” I laughed. I crawled back down and left the photo in his hand.
Yunho pulled me to his side upon adjusting in his place then embraced me from behind. “Uh-huh.” he whispered. He dropped the photo on the floor.
“What are you gonna do to that picture?” I asked.
“It's for private reasons.” His hand s from my waist to my chest then back down. “Personal...” He glided his hand under my shirt and traced my abdomen with his thumb. “...reasons.” I could feel him leave soft, light kisses along my neck and shoulders.
“Are you flirting with me, Mr. Jung?” I teased, tightening his embrace.
“Yes.” he replied in between kisses. “Is it working?”
“Like a charm.” I spun to meet his face and lifted my leg over to stradle him. He pushed my head downward to make our lips meet for a feverish kiss. A helpless grunt of satisfaction escaped my throat as we continued what was developing into a torrid make-out session.
Yunho grabbed my thigh and pulled it upward for our hips to meet in place. He raised his hips and fell back down on the cushions. I pulled on his collar to make him sit up. My thighs were resting opposite the side of his legs. I ground my hips against the front of his jeans. He let out a moan into my mouth and pressed my head harder against his to deepen the kiss even more. His taste...his lips... his tongue.
Clicks. Pops. Snaps. Moans. Yunho took the hem of my shirt and gently lifted it upward. I felt the couch tip... then...
BOOOG!
“Aw, .” Yunho laughed as we broke a kiss. “It fell back!” I laughed along hysterically with him.
“Bedroom?” he offered.
~*~*~
“So... early...” Junsu groaned, sinking in his chair.
“Sit up straight or your back will hurt, Su.” Halmuni tapped Junsu on the shoulder and offered him a mug of coffee. “This will wake you up.” He sat properly, took the mug and thanked Halmuni.
“Hey, Changmin.” I greeted the tall, spectacled dude before me upon his entrance in the living room. Changmin smiled and sat next to me on the sofa.
“You talked yesterday, right? With Jaejoong hyung?” He whispered. Maybe he sensed that I haven't told Yunho anything yet.
“Yeah. How'd you know?” I asked.
“He told me. I'm sorry for what he said... it must've driven you crazy.” Changmin sounded worried. “He never should've said anything... you and Yunho hyung are doing so well. I don't want that do get ruined...”
“What's gonna happen to him while Jooeun's not around?” I couldn't help but ask... for my sake.
“I don't know. He said it was a good thing: Jooeun going away. If he misses her, then that means she means something to him. If not...” Changmin paused and sighed deeply. “I think you should stay away from him. Stay close to Yunho hyung. Don't let him near you.” He looked at Junsu. “We'll make sure of that.”
“Who else knows?”
“Just us. We can't tell anybody else. Jaejoong hyung is dangerous... he's just too unstable. He has been since you left and stayed with Yunho hyung. Truth is, Sunmi... he likes you... still.”
“I don't know what to do, Min...”
“Don't be scared. Just do as I told you...”
Changmin has always been everybody's secret box. It's a mystery how he stays sane. How much he knows about the world is as much as he knows about each of our dark sides. Trust me... he knows a great deal about the world. He's not your typical nerd... he's Shim Changmin.
“Good morning!” two voices greeted as the door opened.
“Hello, hello! Come on in!” Halmuni welcomed Jaejoong and Jooeun into the living room.
I could almost swear the room lit up a hundred times more when the JooJae couple came in. It seemed as if they brought wind machines too. Even though they were both in jeans and t-shirts, they failed to look simple and common. They were just too perfect to ever blend in a crowd.
And since they were... how could Jaejoong even think of Jooeun as 'not as amazing' as me. I'm the least bit amazing. I guess perfect people are just blinded by their own light and invisible wind machines. Jaejoong obviously didn't look as happy as Jooeun. He looked like he didn't want to be here.I could sense a hint of fear from him too.
Jaejoong caught sight of me. He smiled slightly and nodded. Jooeun followed his gaze. She flashed a wide, unforced, bright smile and sprinted towards the couch to sit next to me. She took me in her arms and hugged me so tight, I could feel her breathe.
“How are you?” she asked, still smiling.
“Fine... I guess.” I whispered almost just to myself. “You look...” Glowing? Stunning? Gorgeous? Amazing? “...great.” Words were never suitable to describe Jooeun. Sometimes it'd be best to just collapse on the floor and start having a seizure.
“Yunho!!” Jooeun broke our embrace and stood up to greet Yunho. “Listen, I'm sorry I had to resign. The agency called me to model full-time now.”
“It's fine. I understand.” Yunho smiled, accepting her apology. “You're leaving for Japan?”
“Yeah. Tomorrow morning.” Jooeun nodded. “Today's my last day on Korea. I'm not coming back until after three weeks.”
“I'll get you some coffee. Oh! And Jaejoong-sshi. I still have that board of two-by-four. I'll get it from the storage. I'll be right back, children.” Halmuni said. We all bade her a smile as she went to the kitchen.
“Can't you stay until after we leave for the States?” Yoochun entered the conversation after clearing his throat..
“It's an urgent call, I'm so sorry. But if ever I'm around the US, I'll let you know right away.” Jooeun flashed a killer, bright smile.
This is so messed up. Was I the only one who was finding this abnormal?
Jaejoong suddenly sat next to me on the couch like dead weight. Yunho's face dropped. Changmin and Junsu shot up from their seats. Yoochun just looked confused. For everybody's sake, I stood up and took Yunho's arm in mine. I faked a smile and looked up at Yunho. “Yunho. Let's go unpack, okay?” I suggested.
“Uh. Yeah?” Yunho looked just as confused as Yoochun.
I dragged him up the stairs anyway and didn't dare turn back to that hellhole of a living room.
“What's wrong, Sunmi?” Yunho asked as soon as the bedroom door was closed.
I ignored him. Instead, I knelt on the floor to my duffle bag and ped it. “Did I leave my shampoo in your apartment? God, it's missing...” I stood to head for my other bag on the corner of the room.
“Sunmi. Is there something I need to know?” Yunho held my shoulders firmly and looked straight into my eyes. “Go ahead. Tell me.”
I felt like crying. It was just too much. I'm so confused. I love Yunho but, whatever it was I was feeling for Jaejoong before I still couldn't explain it. What if my heart was looking for a rebound or an immediate cure so I won't feel as terrible. And what if that rebound or immediate cure... was Yunho.
I didn't want to think that way. I know myself. I know when I'm truly happy... and I am happy with Yunho. I'm just... oddly concerned about Jaejoong.
“Jaejoong and I talked. He...” I took a breath. I was afraid to say the wrong words. I didn't want him to misunderstand. “Changmin told me something.”
“Jaejoong's still into you, huh?” Yunho's downcast eyes scared me. . I made a terrible... terrible mistake. He loosened his grip on my shoulder. “That son of a .”
Yunho harshly turned the doorknob and opened the door. I grabbed his shoulder to stop him from leaving. . I'm in deep . He shrugged me off and dragged his feet down the stairs.
“Yunho. No.” I called him.
It was all too late. He was in the living room already. He held Jaejoong on one shoulder and made him face his way. It all happened too fast for anyone to stop. Yunho's fist had flown into the air and landed on Jaejoong's cheek.
Jaejoong fell to the floor, his face painted with confusion, fear and shock. He wiped the side of his mouth to check for blood. Seeing that there was none, he smirked. “What the hell, Jung Yunho?” His eyes darted upward to meet Yunho's.
Yunho grabbed Jaejoong by the collar and lifted him off the floor. Jaejoong was limp and was easily carried like a puppet. Yunho punched him again, letting out a yell. He landed on the glass coffee table, shattering it into pieces. Jaejoong let out a grunt of pain.
Yoochun, Junsu, Changmin and Jooeun were just frozen in their places. So was I. . I can't move. I can't stop this. Halmuni... where are you?
“You've always wanted to top whatever I have and done, Kim Jaejoong. You've crossed the line. Are you tying to take Sunmi away from me? You've outdone yourself. That's the lowest you've ever been.” Yunho's voice shook with hate. His chest was heaving as he spoke. He seem to be holding back tears.
Jaejoong stood up. He stumbled a few steps forward and threw a punch across Yunho's face, making him lose his balance. Yunho's eyes widened in disbelief that Jaejoong had just hit him. He returned the punch with brute force.
All hell broke loose. Punches flew.
Their lips were busted and their mouths seemed to be filling up with more blood. They were sweating and their cheeks were starting to swell. Yoochun, Junsu and Changmin tried to break fight but were knocked off their feet or were punched as well.
When Jaejoong fell for the second time, Yunho struck him with a kick to the stomach. Jaejoong returned the previous attack by sweeping his leg under Yunho's feet. They were both on the ground. Jaejoong straddled Yunho and ground him with a series of punches. I spotted Jooeun crying. My heart felt like it was being crushed.
“Yunho... Jaejoong...” I said softly.
“Yunho... Jaejoong....” I called again.
“Yunho! Jaejoong!” I yelled.
I felt my legs again. I took a few steps towards them, my eyes bluring with tears. They didn't seem to hear. Jooeun's sobs were becoming more audible as Yunho took over Jaejoong and punched him continously. I knelt behind Yunho. Jaejoong's eyes gazed at me. I felt my tears on my cheeks. I began to sob.
“Stop it, please. Just stop!” I embraced Yunho. “Stop, Yunho...”
Jaejoong pushed Yunho. Yunho fell back... so did I. I caught myself on my side. I felt something sharp and hard pierce my hand up to my arm. It was glass... the coffee table. I could feel the pieces penetrate my skin deeper since Yunho's weight was upon me. I could see blood.
“Sunmi!!” Yoochun screamed. The weight above me went away. My eyes blurred. I didn't know if it was because of crying or something else. The living room was spinning.
“Halmuni!!” Junsu called.
It grew dark...
and the last I saw...
were Yunho's eyes...
his dark hazel eyes.
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