-November 20, 2015-

I don’t know whether to dread this day or not. As I was driving towards the YG building, all I can think was what Baekhyun had said yesterday. And I don’t even know whether that was really the case with Mr. G-Dragon or not. And truthfully, I don’t know how I should behave today when I meet him.

I’ve texted him a while ago saying that I’ll be there soon. I even stopped by a restaurant to get something for us to eat during practice breaks. I hope that things will be decent enough. I don’t know what actually that I am hoping from him today after what happened weeks ago. Why you so complicated Taeyeon?

Shifting into park, I glanced outside the window of my car, hoping to see G-Dragon’s face plastered on my window, smiling at me. But instead I saw him standing far away, waiting by the door to the building. I sighed. This is going to be hard.

As I sauntered towards him with hands full of bags, I saw him looked up at me. Why aren’t you smiling, Mr. G?

He did keep his gentleman side though, he helped me with the bags, and even held the practice door opened for me. But we are still not talking. After letting me settle down for a little bit, we straight away started our practice, professionally. And only then, I heard him talking to me, but that was only to tell me the changes that he had suggested and such. All professional stuff.

Apparently I was getting worked up all through practice. I cannot stand this anymore. Where did the friendly G-Dragon sunbaenim go? Where did my Ji go? Wait! My Ji?!!! What was that, Taeyeon?

Suddenly, we heard a knock on the door, and I saw Taeyang sunbaenim making his way into the room. We greeted each other, and I can see that Taeyang sunbaenim is a friendly person. I mean I’ve heard of him from the members, but I didn’t know him personally as this was the first time seeing him outside of work. We stopped practicing for a bit as he came up at me and started small talks with me. After a bit, he excused himself and asked G-Dragon sunbaenim to follow him to one corner of the room. I couldn’t listen to their conversation – not that I wanted to eavesdrop or something- but I could hear them laughing from time to time.

And everytime G-Dragon sunbaenim laughed, I felt my heart fluttered. And when I saw him smiled, I felt my heart swelled with affection. That’s when I realized, I missed him. I had thought that I only needed us to be talking like normal because I don’t want us to be awkward. And when I had thought that he liked me, I pushed him, not because I hate him, but because I am afraid that things will get awkward, and of course the fear because of hate from netizens.

And…

And that I like him. What have you done to me, Mr. G? Are you going to take responsibilities for making me like this, Mr. G?

After their talk, we resumed practicing for another 2 times before decided to eat the food that I brought. Both of us sat on the couch and chowed on our food silently. That’s when I decided that I need to clear something with him, because my feeling was bothering me so much and so did what Baekhyun said yesterday. Now or never, Taeyeon. Fighting!

I turned towards him and placed a hand on his, startling him. He looked up at me with eyes full of confusion. You look adorable, Mr. G.

“Ji, are we really gonna be like this?” Slowly, Taeyeon. One step at a time. I saw him still having the confused look on his face though. Clearing my throat, “Don’t you miss us talking freely like before, laughing and joking around, calling and texting about almost everything? Or was it just me?”

He is still not talking though, but at least he hadn’t removed my hand from his. At least he is letting me do that much. I sighed. “Okay then. Maybe I understood your advances before wrongly. I thought you liked me. My bad. Let’s just drop this. We not gonna be meeting each other anyway after MAMA. We can just stay professional until then, right?” I let go of his hand and proceed to eat again. That better do the trick. Say something, Mr. G.

“I missed us too.” His voice was so low, but I caught