“Woah, woah, woah, let me get this straight,” Wonshik said from his seat next to Hongbin on their less-than-Gucci couch. Hyuk was standing in front of them, eyes on the floor and hands wrung together is a very awkward looking knot. “The staring thing you’ve been doing for weeks now is a mating ritual-”

“Dating ritual,” Hyuk interrupts with an extremely panicked look on his face. “I said dating ritual.”

“Alright, so dating ritual,” Wonshik corrects himself. “And you’re only performing this ritual because you’re a weenie?”

“Well, I wouldn’t say it’s because I’m a weenie necessarily… it’s just because I’m too nervous to confess my feelings to a human, so I send off wave signal thingies to kind of give Hongbin that vibe.”

“That’s the definition of being a weenie, Hyuk.”

“I mean, he’s kind of right,” Hongbin agreed with the tragically hair-styled man next to him. “You could’ve just done what a human would do.”

“And how would I do that?”

Before Hongbin could answer the question, Ravi bolted off of the couch while using Hongbin’s shoulder as a boost, resulting in Hongbin’s downfall (literally). “Allow me to give an example on what a human would do, my young alien friend.”

Wonshik wrapped a friendly arm around Hyuk’s shoulders and leaned against him. “A great way to an unsuspecting person’s heart is by leaving anonymous and subtle sticky notes around the house that only you and said person live in. The sticky notes can read things such as “I love the way you straighten your hair”, “nice , kiddo”, and “Man, I really dig you in a totally homo way, bro””.

Hyuk gave him a sceptical look, but didn’t say anything.

“Don’t give me that look, Sanghyuk.” Wonshik said as he moved to place two hands on the alien’s shoulders. “You just have way too many nerves. I know just the way to get rid of all this clouding up in your head.”

The next thing they knew, they were all sitting on the floor surrounding a bottle of cheap vodka, a pitcher of Kool Aid©, and an extremely random plastic carton of cherries. Wonshik brought out the cherries because it was literally the only thing they had in their fridge other than a carton of spoiled milk and a bottle of ketchup, upturned as a desperate attempt for the last drop of the condiment.

Fun fact: aliens have a high alcohol tolerance. So when Wonshik and Hongbin were drunk and giggling against one another, Hyuk was just smiling at his two stupid house-mates.

After another swing from Wonshik’s magical concoction of the two drinks they had in front of them, Hongbin suddenly gasped and turned to face Wonshik.

“Ravi. Won-chic. Lucky Boy. Gho-gho-gho-gho-ghost.”

“What the are you tryin’ to say to me?” Wonshik mumbled while his eyes attempted to focus on Hongbin.

“I jus- , just thought of another way to a person’s heart.” He whispered as he leaned his head against Wonshik’s shoulder affectionately. “One way to a person’s heart is to write them a beautiful sheet of music.”

“Oh, my god.” Wonshik inhaled sharply as he brought both hands to his own face. “You’ve cracked it, Log bin!” Wonshik attempted to stand up to demonstrate his satisfaction, but he just felt too heavy. He decided to lay down instead. “You’ve cracked the code. Hashtag hacked.”

“I’m sorry that I never wrote you a beautiful song, Sanghyuk.” Hongbin said while tears endlessly began pouring from his eyes.

Hyuk didn’t understand why Hongbin was crying, so he kind of started to panic. “Wait, why are you apologizing? Why would you be the one writing the song? I was supposed to confess to you!”

Hongbin stopped crying instantly. “Oh, right. I forgot. Ya know, I was voted Most Forgetful While Drunk in high school.”

“That’s not a real high school superl- superlate-ve- ,” Wonshik was slurring and was having a really hard time. “Hold up, lemme try again. Su per le div. Superlative. That’s not a real high school superlative, scum bag!” He exclaimed with a lazy kick in Hongbin’s general direction.

“How would you know?”

“We went to the same high school, genius! You were voted Most Beautiful Smile.” Wonshik shifted his gaze up to the ceiling and sighed. “And they weren’t wrong.”

Wonshik continued to grossly compliment Hongbin while the bean himself started to punch him in the stomach.

“Hongbiiiin, if you keep punching me, ‘m gonna vomit on you.” Hongbin continued to punch him. “I am not joking. I’ve already drank my weight in alcohol.”

To be honest, Sanghyuk had no clue what the was happening. Why were they doing this again? Where is this plot going? He misses Hakyeon. He misses Jaehwan. He misses his mom.

“I think I’m gonna go to sleep,” Sanghyuk said as he slowly stood up from his place on the floor. If anyone was gonna vomit, he wanted to be as far away from it as possible.

“Sounds like a good idea, ET.” Wonshik said as he reached his arms out for Sanghyuk to take. After he finally got up, he gave him a nice, warm hug. “We’ll write songs in the morning,” He whispered into his ear before pulling away with a drunken smile.

While Wonshik staggered to his room, Sanghyuk helped Hongbin to stand from the floor.

“You’re a good man, Sanghyuk. Hakyeon must be proud to call you his son.” Hongbin said as he grabbed onto Sanghyuk’s shoulder to keep himself from swaying into nonexistence. “You’re gonna have to help me get to my room BTW. I was also voted Most Clumsy While Drunk in high school.”