Everything was in place; the alien known as Sanghyuk was going to be apprehended and questioned tonight.

Wonshik was currently hiding behind their cheap gay couch while Hongbin was keeping lookout. They knew that after Hyuk would realize Hongbin wasn’t going to show up at his planned destination, he would probably return to the apartment and they were totally prepared. Now they wait.

After a little bit less than an hour, Hongbin signaled that Sanghyuk was approaching. The signal was basically just Hongbin making a noise that sounded a lot like a dying lawn mower. Hongbin circled around in confusion before he decided to just hop behind the couch with Wonshik.

Right when Hongbin landed on the floor, the apartment door creaked open. He was talking on the phone.

“I don’t know, Hakyeon.” He sighed. “I’ve just never been very good with confessions, especially with humans.”

There was a pause as Hyuk closed the door. Wonshik glanced over at Hongbin who was listening intently.

“I mean, he actually thinks I’m funny. He’ll laugh at my jokes. When he laughs, he has the prettiest smile…”

A super light blush dusted Hongbin’s cheeks as he looked down at his fingers.

Wonshik nudged him and whispered “Wow, das gay.” right into his earhole.

Hongbin knew he wasn’t lying; That was pretty gay of Sanghyuk.

“He’s right though,” Wonshik quickly added. “You have a really nice smile.”

This statement only made Hingnog blush more. “Someone call the fire department before I go up in flames,” he said as he wiped some sweat off of his forehead. He was nervous.

“I donno, man.” Wonshik said quietly as he placed a hand on Hongbin’s shoulder. “If I called them, then our cover would be blown.”

The Bean let out a sigh. So many people were right this evening. He was getting a migraine.

“You can’t escape my compliments, Lee Hongbin,” Wonshik said. “They will always find you and your smile that puts the sun to shame.”

Hongbin dragged his hands down his face in distress. “Oh my god, end this madness.” Wonshik responded by wrapping his arms around Hoingbin’s waist and nuzzling his cheek against his shoulder.

Sanghyuk’s conversation with his mom became background noise for Bean boy and Wonshik as they started being gay af behind the couch. Wonshik stopped mid-compliment when he noticed Sanghyuk’s shadow looming over them. The two looked up to see said 12-year-old looking down at them with his phone still in hand.

“Uh, I’ll call you back,” He said as he continued to stare at them with a look that was a good blend of embarrassment, confusion, and distress. He shoved his phone into his pocket and mumbled “Uh, sorry for interrupting.”

“No, no, no!” Hongbin almost yelled as he pried Wonshik’s arms off of him. “it’s not what it looks like,” then he pushed the poor rapper onto the floor. “I don’t even know this guy!” He said as he quickly stood up.

“So this is what heartbreak feels like,” Wonshik whispered to himself as he stared up at the ceiling. Hongbin kicked him in the shoulder.

“I, uh, didn’t know you guys were…” Sanghyuk coughed. “An item or whatever.”

“We’re not!” Hongbin yelled louder than was necessary. “I mean,” He lowered his voice to a reasonable level. “We’re not together. We’re just really good friends?” Hongib looked down at Wonshik for help.

“Okay, I would say it’s, like, we gay,” Wonshik sat up to think better. “but Hongbin can be more gay for you than for me, ya know?”

“I think I get it,” Hyuk said, but his face told a different story.

Wonshik stood up and gripped Sanghyuk’s boney shoulder. “We’re really good friends who also touch each other’s butts and make-out sometimes if I’m lucky.” That earned Wonshik a nice punch on the shoulder from the bean.

Somehow, that explanation made sense to Sanghyuk. “Oh! I got you, man! That’s chill.”

“All friendships should be this way, honestly,” Wonshik said as he threw an arm around Hongbon’s shoulders and gave him a kiss on the cheek. Wow, gay.

“I actually don’t see why you humans don’t,” Sanghyuk said as he observed Hongbin’s grumpy blushing face. “The affections we show our significant others is very similar to that we show our friends.”

Wonshik and Hongbin stared at Sanghyuk for a while until Wonshik said, “I totally forgot you were an alien until you started talking like a prick.”

All this alien talk reminded Hongbin the reason why him and Wonshik were hiding behind the couch in the first place; they were trying to figure out this whole brainwashing thing. Hongbin nudged Wonshik, hoping that he would remember their objective.

“What’s up?” Wonshik responded to Hongbin’s nudge.

Hongbin rolled his eyes (that sassy bastard) and cleared his throat. “You aliens sure do some… weird things, right, Wonshik?”

“Yeah, I guess.” Then it clicked. “Oh. OH. Han Sanghyuk, if that’s even your real name, you’re under arrest for being sketchy as !” Wonshik said as he spun the alien twerp around, grabbed his wrists, and pushed him harshly against the wall.

“Ow, what the hell,” Sanghyuk whined with his cheek against the wall. “I may be new to this whole ‘earth-thing’, but I know for a fact that you’re not a cop.”

Wonshik gave Sanghyuk’s heel a quick yet painful kick. “You have no idea, motherer!”

“Wonshik, this isn’t a 1990’s soap op.”

“I was going more for an early 2000’s Nick @ nite feel,” Wonshik shrugged as he loosened his grip on Sanghyuk’s scrawny little wrists. What a weenie.

“I thought you said you were more of a Disney Channel kind of kid.”

“I was, but I always switched to Nickelodeon once the clock struck 9pm.”

Hongbin scoffed a bit. “And you think you know a guy, huh?”

Okay, back to the matter at hand.

“Alright, Hyuk, what’s up with this sketchy brainwashing alien thing you’ve been doing to my bean boy over here?”

“Okay, first of all, it’s not “brainwashing”,” Sanhyuk said as he tried to turn around in Wonshik’s grip. “Second of all, I’ll explain everything if you let me go.”

“How do we know you’re not gonna run off again?” Hongbin asked as he took a step closer.

“I won’t, I won’t. I promise.” He looked Hongbin in the eyes as he spoke. “You can barricade the door or whatever, just make Wonshik let me go.”

After a few seconds of thought, Hongbin tapped Wonshik’s bicep. “Alright, let him go.”

Wonshik didn’t let go. Instead, he leaned over to whisper in Hoongbin’s ear. “What if he’s just brainwashing you to tell me to let him go?”

“It’s weird to explain, but I can tell he’s not doing anything,” Hongbin whispered back. “Now, let him go.”

“Fine,” Wonshik mumbled as he let go of Sanghyuk. “but I’m not happy about it.”

Sanghyuk took in a deep breath as he took a large step away from the wall. “Alrighty, fellas. I guess I have some explaining to do. You might want to take a seat.”

Sorry that took me forever to write! I wish I could say it was because I was busy, but I'm actually just lazy af. Forgive me...

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