Jihyo wanted to prepare dinner, but her brother suggested they order in.

“Aniya,” she shook her head. I don’t want oppa to eat outside food yet.” Gary turned his head when she referred to him as ‘oppa’, because it felt unfamiliar. But he didn’t say anything.

“Then I’ll help you,” her brother offered.

“No, I’m okay,” she insisted. “Don’t you have to leave soon?”

He glanced at the clock and frowned. But he shook his head. “Aniya, I’ll help.”

“But…” Jihyo started.

“You can leave,” Gary, who had been observing the conversation, spoke up. “I’ll help.”

“Eo?” both siblings looked at him in surprise.

“Eo,” her brother eventually said.

“I’ll send you down,” Gary offered. When they were out of the house, her brother asked about his condition.

“I still can’t remember yet,” he shook his head.

Sungmoon sighed. “But I’m still glad that you are alive,” he said, hugging him.

Gary returned the hug awkwardly. “Were we close?” he asked.

Sungmoon looked at him, hurt flashing in his rounded eyes. “Of course! We visited each other every week,” he said. “Your family isn’t here anymore, that’s why.”

“My family? Where did they go?”

“Huh?! Noona hasn’t told you? You were an orphan…”

Gary blinked in shock, shaking his head.

“It must have slipped off her mind,” Sungmoon commented.

“Hm…” Gary mumbled. She doesn’t even talk to me, he thought, but doesn’t say.

Sungmoon shrugged. “Anyway, I’ll need to leave now. I’ll come by soon. Get well soon, hyung!”

Gary nodded.

When he returned, Jihyo was still cooking, so the kids pestered him to play with them. He wanted to help Jihyo, but she brushed him off.

“What do you want to play?” he asked.

The kids looked shocked. Usually he would suggest games to play. From the kitchen, Jihyo sighed. Undeterred, Jiyoung pulled out the toy car set, wanting to play the rescue game. Gary didn’t know how to play, but thankfully, he pretended that he did by just mimicking their actions. There were some minor hiccups here and there, but the children didn’t suspect anything else.

When Jihyo announced that dinner was ready, they kept the toys. Gary observed that the children were able to feed themselves, so he didn’t help them. But he didn’t offer them food either. It was mostly Jihyo helping them take the food. Then, Jiyoung asked, “Appa, why aren’t you helping us with the food?”

It was only then he realised that Jihyo had barely eaten, so he put some meat onto her plate. Jihyo stared at the meat. If it was Gary in the past, he would have fed her directly instead. She blinked away her tears and mumbled thanks. But the sadness in her voice couldn’t escape Ji-ohn’s ears.

“Eomma, wae ulro?” she asked.

“Aniya, I’m not,” she said, rubbing Ji-ohn’s cheek. “I’m just tired.”

“Was it tiring to look after appa?” she asked suddenly. Gary looked at Jihyo. Suddenly he realised that it never occurred to him that she could be tired. Here he is, requiring a young child to point it out to him. He felt guilty. He had been only concerned about himself- being confused and all. But Jihyo was the one who did all the work. He made up his mind to help Jihyo later.

“No,” Jihyo replied, stunned by the question at first. “I’m tired because of the plane ride. Let’s hurry eat so we can sleep early, okay?”

They soon finished their meals and Jihyo kept the dishes. Like a reflex, she said to Gary, “Oppa, can you bathe the kids?”

As soon as the words left she realised her mistake. “Ah, never mind, I’ll do it.”

“No, I can do it,” he said. “Shampoo, soap, rinse, dry. Right?”

“Eo…”

“Do they bathe together?” he asked. Jihyo stared at him for a while before nodding.

“Go get your clothes and towels,” he said to the children. They giggled, and dashed into their room. They grabbed their clothes.

“Your towels?”

They looked at him, confused. “It’s in the toilet…” Ji-ohn said.

“Ah… right,” he said, pretending. “Let’s go bathe then!” He followed their lead to the toilet and undressed them. He wetted their body with water first, then applied shampoo. But just a couple of minutes after he started, Ji-ohn cried again.

“Ahhhh!!” she wailed, as the soapy water went into her eyes. Gary tried to rub of the soap with his soapy hands, making things worst. Jihyo came running into the toilet. “What’s wrong?” she asked, her voice exhausted.

“I…” Gary mumbled. Jihyo looked at Ji-ohn and saw the soap running into her eyes. She sighed and washed it off gently with cold water.

“Sorry,” Gary mumbled, watching on helplessly. Eventually, Jihyo finished bathing them on her own. She dressed them and put them to bed as well.

“You have to tell her when you start rinsing with water…” Jihyo said. “She can’t see when the water is coming…”

“Sorry… I’ll remember it the next time.”

Jihyo sighed and went back to the kitchen.

“I’ll help with the washing,” he offered.

“No, just go and bathe first.”

Gary stood there blankly. “I… don’t know where are my clothes…” he mumbled. Wordlessly, Jihyo walked into the master bedroom and pointed out his drawer.

“I’m sorry,” Gary repeated. It’s the only thing that he can say, although it probably offers no comfort to her. She ignored it and left the room.

While he was in the room, he looked around, taking in all its surroundings. He noticed their wedding picture hung above their bed.  She was smiling so radiantly, and Gary’s heart ached to see her smile like that again. He bathed, came out and saw Jihyo sleeping on the couch. She seemed so peaceful, he didn’t want to disturb her. But it was probably uncomfortable for her to sleep like this, so he woke her up.

“Why didn’t you come in?” he asked.

“You were bathing…”

“I’m sorry…”

“Stop saying that!” Jihyo said, as if something snapped in her.

“I…” he almost said I’m sorry again, before catching himself.

Then, without warning, Jihyo started to cry. It startled Gary, because he didn’t know what to do. He stood there, with his mouth hanging open. Jihyo ran into their room and locked the door.

“Hey!” Gary yelled. But his reaction was too late.

He knocked on the door softly, afraid to wake the children up. “Hey… hey…” But he was ignored. After about an hour or so, Jihyo came out, dressed in her pyjamas. Gary stood up from the sofa immediately.

“Are you okay?” he asked, running towards her.

“I’m fine,” she brushed him away. “Go in and sleep, I’ll sleep with the children.”

“…”

“I don’t want to make you feel uncomfortable,” she said.

“But…”

Jihyo left, before he was able to finish speaking.

It the middle of the night, Gary woke up. He heard soft sobbing from the living room. He saw Jihyo, huddled on the couch and crying. She must have came out because she didn’t want to worry the kids. He slowly approached her.

“Jihyo,” he called softly. She didn’t look up. He sat beside her.

“Hey…” he called again. “Tell me what’s wrong? Will you?”

She still ignored him.

“Please? I want to help you?”

Still no response.

“Is it me? Am I doing things wrong?”

Finally, she looked up.

“It’s not you, it’s me,” she said. “I miss the old you so much, part of me die each time I see the way you act. Like what Ji-ohn said, you’re Gary but you’re not him. You forgot everything about us. How could you be him? I miss the way you speak to me, the way you understand me without me needing to tell you things. Take this, for example. In the past, you wouldn’t have to ask me why I cried- you just knew. But now…

“I know I shouldn’t be blaming you because this isn’t your fault, but I can’t help it. I know I should be talking to you more to help regain your memory, but each time we speak you feel so distant and I get torn by that. You’re acting like a total stranger. The way you handle the kids… the way you speak to me. It feels like it’s normal for you, doesn’t it. But that’s not the way you usually behave. You know?”

A pause. Then.

“How would you know,” she sighed. “You’re not you anymore.”

“I’m sorry…” Gary mumbled, looking down.

“No, you shouldn’t be. I’m the one who’s messed up. It’s not even your fault and I’m acting like you wanted to be amnesic. But each time I look at you I want to hug you. I haven’t seen you in weeks, oppa. I longed for you, to touch me, to hug me, to hold me…”

Gary suddenly made a move to hug her. It broke her barricade of tears. She sobbed into his shoulders. He patted her back, like how she comforts Ji-ohn.

“I missed you…” she sobbed. “I missed you, so, so much…”

“I know,” he whispered. She pulled away. He reached out to dry her tears. “I’m sorry I forgot you,” he said. “But I know you love me a lot, from the way you looked after me all this week. And I must have loved you a lot too. Not just because Dong Hoon ssi told me, but because I feel it here,” he said, pointing to his heart. “It melts each time you make the tiniest of smiles. And I know I want to make you happy again, even though I can’t remember you. But one day, I will…”

“And if you don’t?”

He kissed her forehead, like how he used to. Like it was a muscle memory.

“Then, I’ll fall in love with you again,” he said, looking into her eyes.

Jihyo couldn’t help but smile. Her cheeks blushed slightly.

“Are you sure you’re my wife?” Gary joked, lightening up the mood. “Why are you blushing at such a small thing?”

“You’ve always said that,” Jihyo pointed out, her smile shining through again.

“Said what?”

“That I’m blushing over small things.”

Gary smiled. “Maybe cause some things don’t change,” he said.

She nodded. Like their love.

They’ll always find their way back to each other. Time after time, they’ve lost each other- when they were kids, when he ran away to Canada, when she lost her memory… and time after time, they found each other. They just had to look deep inside their hearts, their love is always there. And they’ll find it, time after time. Maybe even when their lives end and they move on to afterlife, they’ll find each other.

So now, she’s confident. He will find her.