Today was a horrible day. Worst day yet, maybe. Not a single class, just various flavours of drill and PT from breakfast all the way to dinner. I know it's supposed to get tougher as we get to the end of the training, but not this way, surely? I've no idea what's gotten into the other guys today. They were attacking each task as if there were gold bars or early discharges up for grabs at the end and I just couldn't let them down. It's honestly the first time I've felt the extra eight years or so I have on most of them. It's scary, thinking suddenly that I can't keep up when previously I was pretty convinced that I'm in better shape than the lot of them.

Knowing that it's Thursday today didn't help. And maybe it's not so much my fitness, but my mind that I've been struggling with all day. Junsu's TV show appearance is being broadcast tonight and they've scheduled it well after curfew, so there's no chance to see it until someone sticks it up on YouTube and we happen to have free time. Which won't be until the weekend at the earliest…

Sneaking out is definitely not an option. We're too close to winning the team competition for me to jeopardise that with another stunt. I got off easy the last time because I was showing team spirit. Sneaking into the TV lounge to watch Junsu's music show at midnight doesn't qualify as spirited anything. At least, I don't think it does.

Not to mention that tomorrow is another tough day. Thirty kilometres over rough terrain with full kit. But I'm trying not to think about that. I'd rather imagine Junsu showing them all how it's done. Though it does bug me to hell and back that I'll be the last to see it…