Prompt: taokai drabble from Tell Me I'm a Bad Man
Rating: pg13

Everything is red.

Jongin twists in sweat soaked sheets, heart racing and breathing erratic as his nightmare plays out on the backs of his eyelids.  He used to only be plagued by the brutal deaths of his parents, but now it’s different.  The face of his father is replaced with Tao’s, watching as his chest explodes while Jongin is helpless to stop it.  He knows it’s not real and yet the pain has him whimpering, his body fighting against the tight hold that’s threatening to wake him.

He jolts as his eyes pop open, terrified for a few moments until he hears the low hum of Tao’s voice, the pressure of Tao’s hands on his arms, the scent of Tao floating through the air and into his lungs to ease him into reality.  Jongin slumps into Tao’s arms, burying his nose in the crook of Tao’s neck to breathe him in, drown in him to stabilize himself.

“Come on,” Tao urges in a whisper, lifting Jongin out of the bed with him.

The nightmares aren’t as frequent as they used to be, but he’s had them often enough that they’ve worked out the best way to clear them from Jongin’s mind.  Tao is gentle, but commanding as he leads Jongin out of their small cabin.  The trees around them, the comforting scent of petrichor and dirt and nature all fill Jongin’s nose as he breathes.

It’s a start.

Tao helps Jongin as he shifts from man to wolf, his body breaking itself down into a new form that’s made to be stronger, faster.  As Jongin lets loose his first howl, Tao does the same.  He’s beautiful in the moonlight and Jongin’s head is still spinning from the pain of the shift when Tao falls to his side.  Even born wolves are susceptible to the pain that comes with turning from a man to a beast.

Jongin noses at Tao, urging him to rise once his eyes open.  Tao nips at him softly, nuzzling against Jongin until he’s darting off into the trees.  This place is still new, still not quite considered home, but they’re getting there.  The paths they stick to are the same ones they always use when Jongin needs to outrun the images that plague his mind.

He speeds past the ingrained picture of his parents on the ground, covered in blood.  His claws dig into the dirt, sending it flying into the air with every step as he goes even faster, forgetting the slack appearance of Tao’s face, speckles of red from his own chest littering his face.  Jongin feels the rage of his wolf at the thought of such a fate for his mate.  He will never let anything happen to Tao.

Tao isn’t as fast as Jongin; he spent his life curbing the animal instead of running away from his problems.  The pair of them are a mess, still figuring out a middle-ground because their lifestyles will sometimes clash enough to cause a fight.  And neither of them back down from a fight.  Although now, instead of the two of them hobbling off to tend to their wounds alone, Tao will pin Jongin to the ground and clean him before Jongin returns the favor.

Fight or not, they’re mates and nothing can come between them for long.

Simply thinking about Tao has him finally calming, the rage and fear in his veins bleeding from his limbs until he’s slowing, and finally stopping.  His lungs heave as he waits patiently, knowing that it won’t be long before Tao’s warm body is pushing against his, knocking them both to the ground.  It’s not so bad out here; it’s not as comfortable as the clearing they’d left behind, but Jongin’s mind is far from discomfort when he has Tao at his side.

The moon sits low in the sky, shrinking with each passing night.  Jongin relaxes in her presence, relaxes as Tao rolls him to his side and snuffles at him until they’re cuddled together beneath the moonlight.  There are far worse ways to spend a night and even if Jongin can’t get back to sleep, Tao eventually succumbs to his exhaustion and Jongin keeps watch over him until the sun rises.

Jongin wishes he didn’t have to nose at Tao until he woke, wishes they could meander in this pleasant state, but Joonmyun is still on tenterhooks about them being out in their wolf forms - especially during the day.  They haven’t figured out how deep into this forest the humans like to roam and staying out of sight is common sense.  Still, Jongin dips his head and over Tao’s muzzle in apology before the two of them head toward their home.

The world is slowly waking around them and the pair take a little extra time to appreciate the calm.  Their cabin is a welcome sight and they bound to it, going around the side and to the back to slip inside the doggy door they’d installed.  Shifting from man to wolf in the dead of night is one thing, but watching a wolf stand upright and shift into a man in broad daylight is just asking to be discovered.

Jongin is feeling better about things as he crawls into bed, Tao pulling him to his chest and the covers forgotten, kicked to the bottom of the bed.  They probably have a few hours before their alarms go off.  They still have responsibilities and a job is one of them.  Jongin doesn’t want to think about it so he burrows closer in Tao’s arms and inhales his mate.  Tao presses a kiss to Jongin’s temple, fingers caressing lightly down Jongin’s spine.

Jongin falls asleep knowing that he’s safe and protected, and knowing that Tao is going to be there when he wakes again, ready to take on another day.