Chapter 2: Ahhhh ahhhh hot!!!!

Chapter 1: Kyaaaaa!!!!!! This is so sweet! I read those comments below. It's m rated next? U should rate it on the foreword! Not by the chapter! (It's easier to attract readers like me!) ><

Chapter 11: Waaahh...dong wan is back~~~i love him in this..despite he did something before...bjt finally woodong~~
Im glad minwoo held dong wan's hands...

Thank u for updating^^

Chapter 10: It looks better with paragraph breaks now but you still need to improve with capitalization and grammar.
If you have microsoft word, maybe type your chapter there first because it has grammar and spelling check (if you select the right language).
Good work!
My personal comment on this chap: where the hell is dongwan >< is he having vacation on some mountain lolzzz
well, hope woodong meet up and make up soon xD

Chapter 9: Oh noo...Minwoo fainted, Dongwan is leaving...RicSyunggg pls do something to WooDong >///<

Thanka for updated :)

Chapter 9: ok, I've read 8 chapters in one go
Objective comment:
Your use of past tense is inconsistent and it gets jumbled up with present tense a lot.
For conversational dialogues, I think you should use a new sentence instead of writing everything in the same paragraph.
After the apostrophe/quotation mark, the first word should be capitalized.
Names within sentence should be capitalized as well.
There are some spelling mistakes.
The story progress is pretty quick, maybe put in more details such as emotions, actions, series of interactions and inner thoughts.
The plot is quite good.
Subjective comment:
I like the story. I know it's hard to write a lot and in detail since my first few fics were also short, the pace was very quick but you will improve as you write more. Just paint the scene in your head, then try to describe the main focus, then maybe more descriptions for the surrounding, etc.
I don't really like to insert honorifics and romanized Korean words to fic because it's just weird but then again, everyone has different style so it's not something to press on.
As I'm very shinhwa biased, I really love it when someone write a fic about shinhwa so keep on writing! Don't be discouraged by the amount of views, subs and comments. Just write pieces that satisfy yourself. You're writing quite well for a non-english speaker.

Chapter 9: what...??dong wan...u r really...u just left...??
minwoo!!!waaaaaaaaa....T0T....
dong wan...come back quickly...minwoo needs you...huhu T^T
thanks for updating btw..

Ah well :-D:-)

Chapter 7: Lol^^
Funny proposal from the two of them..but it's sweet^^
Woodong,b happy forever!!
Thank you for writing n updating^^

Thumbs up!