“Step, step, ar-NO!” Again.

“Step, step, step, arm, st-” Thud! Ow.

Jungkook looked up from his collapsed pile on the floor, directly into the widespread mirror of the dance studio. He barely recognised himself; he had allowed his hair to grow, covered in sweat, his muscles more defined. Just like Jimin. He was working hard. Too hard.

That didn’t matter. He needed to make his best friend proud, no matter where he was… dead or alive. Everything had changed. People looked at Jungkook with those sympathetic eyes, speaking with those false tones of concern and understanding. They didn’t understand anything. Jungkook was left alone, even his close friends had stopped making an effort. Was he gonna stop them? No.

Jungkook had decided to take a break from school. He was good at school, heck, he liked school; he just couldn’t deal with the staring faces and pointing fingers. Jimin was the popular one. Jungkook was just his best friend. Jungkook was sure nearly everyone was thinking the same thing: it should’ve been him. Maybe it should’ve been.

But Jungkook still had his theories. Theories about what really happened, but all these theories seemed to get buried under the masses of feelings and emotions he was feeling.

Up. Jungkook shook these thoughts away even though he knew they would be back just like a bad smell. But he had to perfect this dance, even if it meant working into the night.

As Jungkook got up and switched the music back to the start, his mind flicked back to the funerals. Jimin’s funeral was one of the hardest moments in Jungkook’s life; Jungkook had been asked to say some words, and, of course, he accepted. He had stood at the front of the church and spoken about Jimin, all the while looking over the coffin, at the framed picture of Jimin which made him look like an angel. He didn’t cry. He kept it in and instead comforted Jimin’s family.

Then he went home and cried. He wept against the teddy bear that Jimin had won him at the fair until he fell asleep. No one except the teddy and Jungkook knew this. And this had been going on for a while now.

For some reason, Jungkook had decided to go the other funeral. What for? Consolidation? A sense of belonging? Or just not wanting to be alone? It did make him feel more comforted, seeing all these people who were experiencing nearly the same pain. And then he saw Frank. Frank who had lost someone close to him too. Almost the same pain.

He couldn’t go to the other funeral. He felt bad, but he couldn’t do it again; stay there in silence and mourn by himself.

The heavy bass line pumped through the studio and Jungkook resumed his dance, determined, desperate even, to get it right this time.

Just as the part he always messed up was coming up, he heard his phone.

Ring… Ring… Ring…

Jungkook, frustrated, switched the music off and the dance studio was suddenly filled with that all too familiar silence. He checked his phone, and sighed when he saw who was calling. His dance was being interrupted because of this. Jungkook swiped the phone and put it to his ear.

“Hello?”

“Hello. Is that Jungkook? It’s D.C Walker here from the police station.”

“I remember.” It was the same steely eyed policeman that conducted one of the interviews. Out of all the interviewers, he was the one that Jungkook remembered the most.

“Well, let’s get to the point. I’m calling because one of the people who were related to another of the victims wants to meet the others. She was the wife of Yongguk, the other male who died.”

Jungkook noticed how he said was instead of is. Just like Jimin was his best friend.

Why all of a sudden did she want to meet? Maybe she was feeling just as lonely as Jungkook. And what about the other relation? Jungkook had wondered what they were feeling, how they were coping, if at all. The policeman carried on talking.

“It is entirely your choice to meet, and if you let us, we can give her your details and arrange the meet-up.”

Jungkook down and then caught sight of himself in the mirror again. He looked awful. This needed to stop. Maybe it would help. Maybe it wouldn’t, then he would never have to see them again.

Still looking at himself, Jungkook his lips and croaked out an answer.

“Okay.”