My swollen eyes opened to the sunlight beaming onto my face the next morning. For a few blissful seconds, I thought everything was just a dream that was way too realistic. I fully believed in it, sitting up and turning to get off the bed-

Bed? I was on the floor. Slowly, I looked around and my eyes took in the mess that I had made last night. And then it hit me: none of it was fake; L really did break up with me. The amount of disappointment and dread I had felt at that moment was enough to choke me. Because I would have to see him today, as friends. That term has never felt so dirty and disgusting on my tongue, leaving a bitter tang.

My whole body ached from sleeping on the hardwood floor, but what hurt me more was the pain of a lost relationship. Numbly I got up, picking up the books that were strewn all over the floor, stuffing them into my bag, leaving the rest of the things unattended.

I left my room, making sure and taking care to lock it so my parents wouldn't flip when they saw the damage in the room. I got ready and went down, sticking a piece of bread in my mouth, calling for my dad to drive me.

"You didn't even eat breakfast yet!" I groaned. "I'm eating it now! Just go Appa! I need to be early for something!" Believing my small white lie, he hurried with me and sent me to school about ten minutes early. I really didn't want to go at all, but I figured that if I went early and quickly got to class, then I wouldn't be under the scrutiny of all of my friends or run into L. 

Getting off the car and yelling a goodbye to my dad, I ran to my locker, keeping my gaze straight ahead to prevent having to greet anybody. When my locker was within my sight, I sighed a small breath of relief; I was not going to be bombarded by questions.

Just as I opened my locker, I felt a presence beside me before a familiar smooth voice greeted me. "Good morning Hwayoung-ah." I winced and looked in his direction, getting my books and closing my locker door. "Hi Sungyeol oppa."

He reached a hand under my chin and tilted my head upwards towards his face. Even with that, I did not meet his eyes and simply looked to the wall behind his head. I felt his grip tighten on my chin. "Look at me Hwayoung-ah." Ever so slowly, my eyes moved over to meet his concerned and pained ones staring back.

Immediately tears formed to rim my eyes and I furiously tried to blink them away. He sighed and pulled me in a tight hug, the back of my head gently with one hand and rubbing my back with the other. "Your eyes are swollen and red Hwayoung-ah...how much did you hurt yourself?"

Those words pieced through me and my tears finally slipped out and a soft sob escaped me. "Sungyeol oppa...please don't ask me..." I felt him nod against the top of my head. "Arasso, I'm sorry for asking you this early, don't cry now, alright? Be stronger than this." I clutched the back of his shirt, tightening my hands into fists and taking a deep breath before moving back and wiping my tears. I forced a weak smile.

"Ne, oppa. You're my only true support right now...I can't lose you too..." I softly whispered the last part, but he heard me and my arm caringly. "You won't lose me. I'll always be there by your side." 

I'll always be there by your side...those words tore through me and my breath left me. It was the same thing L had said when he first confessed to me, promising to always be my support and refuge. All of that went down the drain quickly. He didn't even consider what I thought or how I was feeling about breaking up with him.

Sungyeol put his hand on my head and leaned down to my eye level. "Hwayoung-ah? Gwenchana? We should go now if you want to avoid the others." I blinked at him. "We don't have the same class together." He shook his head and smiled softly.

"I changed a few of my courses, and it completely messed up my schedule. I think I have more classes with you now." I pulled out my schedule, still not believing it. I compared his schedule to mine and realized that we had six out of the eight courses together.

"Oppa, if you wanted to change your courses, why didn't you say anything before? You've already missed an entire week of classes! It'll be difficult to catch up..." I stared at him worriedly, momentarily forgetting about my own problems.

"It's okay, as long as you help me, alright? I'll be there for you, so you better be there for me too." He tapped my forehead lightly, smiling down at me, avoiding my question.

Did he change his courses just for me? It can't be though...can it? Is he that caring? Why was he so cold and indifferent to me when L and I were dating then? I shook those thoughts away and leaned in to give him a side hug.

"Of course I'll help you oppa. You don't know how much you help me with just your presence." I rested my head against his chest and closed my eyes. Maybe I'm not alone.

The first two classes flew by quickly, whether I knew it or not, and it was already lunch. Never have I felt so much dread towards lunch in my entire mere seventeen years of life. I slowed my pace down as I exited the classroom with Sungyeol. Making excuses by tying my shoelace, stopping just to sneeze, and deliberately dropping my books. I really did not want to go to lunch, even if it was inevitable, I wanted to delay it was much as possible.

Sungyeol seemed to have notice my actions and stifled a chuckle. "Hwayoung-ah, if you don't want to go eat with them, you don't have to." He picked up my textbook for me from the ground for the third time, placing a hand on my arm. I looked over at him uneasily and shook my head softly.

"The others kept texting me last night and wanting to know details. I don't want to worry them further, oppa." He sighed and rubbed my arm before resuming our walk to my locker. "This is your own personal matter, pabo. I know they worry, but you've told them that you're fine, so it should be sufficient enough. It would probably be too...uncomfortable for...you guys."

In the end, I ended up walking with Sungyeol to his locker before he dragged me out to lunch, away from the group. I protested, but they were half-hearted because let's face it, I didn't want to be around L anymore than he would.

Sungyeol brought me to a more secluded part of the field behind out school and sat me down before sitting down in front of me. He faced me, resting his head on his elbows, watching me intently. I squirmed a bit under his gaze and pulled back away from him. "Yah, what are you doing..." He cocked his head to the side. "Watching you and making observations."

I looked at him in disbelief. What was I, some sort of lab specimen? Seeing my bewildered expression, he laughed and reached forward to pat my head. "Aigoo, I'm just kidding, Hwayoung-ah, you don't have to be so serious. I just wanted to make you smile and take your mind off of-" he stopped abruptly and winced, stealing a glance in my direction.

L, he was going to say L. My heart automatically beat faster, with just the mention of his name and the thought of him, as it did for the past two years. But then it remembered that L and I were no longer a ship and it dropped. It has yet to get used to the thought of us not being in a relationship anymore. Smiling weakly, I shook my head at Sungyeol.

"Ani, you've been enough already. Gomawo, oppa." He smiled tenderly at me, obviously relieved that he didn't unintentionally rub salt into my wound.

We ate the rest of our lunch in peaceful silence, with him ocassionally comforting me. Occasionally, I would feel a presence behind me and I would whip my head around, scared that it would be L or one of our friends, but there was never anyone there. I was starting to think that I missed L so much that my mind was hallucinating the presence of L. I thought I was finally starting to slowly get a bit better, even if it was just the day after our breakup.

That's what I thought.

Until I realized that the next class I had was with L, the only class that Sungyeol wasn't in. The only class that none of our close friends were in. At first when we first got our schedules, I was excited to have a class alone with him where we could spend some quality time together alone, like a date everyday.

I had everything planned out and we went through it pretty nicely. We would sit near the back together, so as not to attract the teacher's attention, and if anything, we would always sneak out the other door near the back of the classroom.

Looking back on that now, I regret my plan so, incredibly much. When I entered the classroom, I breathed a sigh of relief that I didn't know I was holding until I saw that L was not in his seat yet. I quickly went to my seat, put all the necessary books on the table and stuck in my earbuds. Any distraction from him was a good distraction at this point.

Moments later, I heard a body slip into the seat next to mine and resisted the urge to turn my head around to check. Instead, I glanced down at that person's shoes. Grey sneakers. It was definitely L. I turned back subtly and stared down hard at my books, forcing myself to keep an indifferent expression. A voice coughed awkwardly beside me and I finally looked over. He looked at me with concern and guilt. "H-hwayoung...are you-"

"I'm fine." I interrupted, and turned my gaze back to my books. I felt his gaze continue to bore into me, but I didn't dare look back. Those two words alone had drained all of my energy. "Hwayoung-ah-"

"Alright class, let's begin, Go back to your seats and grab your textbooks." As if on cue, our teacher waltzed in and started the lesson, preventing L from saying anything further. Throughout the entire period, I felt L's gaze on me, even when we were told to copy notes off of the blackboard. I continued to ignore him, not yet ready to face him or talk to him. Not yet ready to pretend like everything was okay and we could still be great friends.

When the period ended, I was the first one to bolt out of the door and run to my next class, where I would at least have Sungyeol. Fortunately, there was only Woohyun and Dasom with us in our class, and those two were the most respectful and gentle out of the ones who had the same age as us in our group.

Surprisingly, I had expected Woohyun to say something or at the very least ask me if I was okay, but he just greeted me with a warm smile and didn't ask any questions.

"Annyeong, Hwayoungie."

"Hey unnie." Both were very considerate of me and I smiled gratefully at them. Sungyeol though, looked at me with worry, knowing that I just had class with L, and I answered him silently with a small nod. I survived, Sungyeol oppa, I survived. 

Though Dasom and Woohyun didn't pry for answers and details, Bora, Sungjong, and Dongwoo did, to a crazy extent. All three of them dragged me to a quiet hall and started shooting me down with questions.

"Hwayoung! Did you know how worried I was? I couldn't even sleep last night!"

"Hwayoungie! You only sent oppa a vague text saying you were okay! How could you be okay, Hwayoungie, how? Don't lie to oppa!"

"Hwayoung-ah! I'm your best friend! Let me take care of you too!"

I shrank under their questions, moving back until I bumped into someone's chest. I turned around, ready to apologize, but those arms pulled me into a hug. "Don't worry your oppas like that Hwayoung-ah. You're a very dear friend to us and none of us would want to lose you." I recognized Sunggyu's voice and immediately relaxed.

As the "leader" of their group, he really did act like one. He was always warm and caring, letting the younger ones bully him and letting them win even if he knew very well that he could beat them. Always greeting us with a gentle and welcoming smile.

I sank into his arms and hugged him tight. "Mianhae oppa, I won't do that again. I'm just not ready to say anything yet." I paused, taking a deep breath before muttering, "Why don't you just ask L..."

He heard me and pulled back, frowning down at me. "Everyone has their own side to a story; their own set of interpretations and hidden feelings. It wouldn't be fair if we only listened to L's side of the story." I looked to the three of them and they nodded seriously.

"L already told us. But we want to hear it from you too. We want to support you too." 

A small tear rolled down my cheek. " Thank you, you guys, but...what L told you was probably all true. I have no hidden feelings or interpretations. He broke up with me. End of story." Sungjong softened and brushed my tear away.

"Arasso, Hwayoung-ah, we won't ask you anymore until you're truly ready. Now please don't cry, it hurts my heart to see you cry..." Bora walked over and hugged me. "I'm sorry I pried, Hwayoung. I was just so worried." I hugged her back, shutting my eyes tight. "I know, Bora, I know."

The rest of the group eventually found us in the hallway and watched our moment silently.

Pulling back and seeing all of their worried faces, I remembered L's words of us being friends. I forced a smile and tried to reassure them. "I'm okay, everyone. Chincha. I just miss the feeling of being in a relationship. L and I are still friends."

They all met me with skeptical expressions on their faces, but seemed to relax a little when they saw me smile, even if it was fake. I mentally sighed and tried to make it a goal: I will try to be friends with L. I will try to make our friendship back to the way it was before we started dating. I will try, no matter what.

After that, I bid them all goodbye and started to walk home. Many of them offered to go with me, but I declined everyone, saying I was fine and needed some time alone. Once out the door, I finally let my smile break apart.

I wasn't fooling anyone, and definitely not myself. I was broken and far from being okay. But still, I needed to get myself back together as quickly as possible, no matter what it takes. 

Shivering in the cold fall weather, I trudged home miserably alone, rethinking about our entire relationship. L didn't really care. He just didn't want to watch me cry because then it would've made him look like a bad person. Selfish prick. Inconsiderate . 

I thought I knew him, but I guess the truth is that he doesn't really care.

But what I didn't see...

A figure was looking over the wall at me, hands clenched into fists, teeth grinding. Another figure put a hand on the first person's shoulder. "Stop. It's done." The person whipped around and brushed his hand off of him shoulder harshly.

"That doesn't mean anything, hyung!" His eyes flared and his entire body shook.

"That doesn't mean anything..." he whispered, looking down as a tear dropped down. 

His friend sighed and patted his shoulder once. "Don't be like this. You're going to break down if you continue being like this." The person whipped around to stare at what he just said. "No. Not in front of Hwayoung. For her sake, I won't break down. I can't afford it." He clenched his fists again. "This is for her..."

His friend shook his head. "If you continue being like this, still hung over from her and caring, she'll never get better."

The person sighed. "I can't just stop caring about her..."

"You must. It's the only way."

He looked up, crestfallen. "What do I do, hyung?"

"Cut off all of your feelings. Go back to being the cold and heartless chic image you have with the public."

He closed his eyes, taking in a deep breath. "If that's what it'll take for her to get better, I'll do it. I'd do anything for her and my friends, even if it means letting her be with my best friend. After she gets better though. Until then, I'll try to be close with her again. When I think she's back to normal, I'll start to distance myself from her. That way, I'll still have some time left." His eyes glistened as he said those last words.

His friend shook his head. "Friends or not, you're going to be hurting her by giving her up. You don't even know if she'll like him."

He let out a short bitter laugh. "I've already hurt her. They've always been close anyway before we started dating, so it wouldn't be that hard for her to fall in love with him."

His friend turned around to stare at him. "Why are you doing this? This won't benefit you in any way, you know."

Looking out the window into the field where I had started to walk on to get home, he placed a hand gently on the glass where my figure was. "I'm alright with only me hurting. As long as they both don't hurt, I'll be alright. As long as I can see their happiness."

Hello everyone! So I'm back with another chapter. I've noticed that some people don't read this far TT^TT Well, I'm sorry if the first few chapters aren't as eventful, but you need to read on for the plot to hit its alright? Please stay with author-nim! I NEED YOU GUYS. And yes, as you may have guessed, it was L speaking. But, who was his friend with him? Read on and you'll find out (: And sorry for the depressing chapters LOL my mood hasn't been the greatest these past few days. Enjoy this update and subscribe if you haven't already ~ (: Thanks!