Chapter9

I switch my phone on my other shoulder as I flip my book to the next page. I could feel my eyelids falling slowly.

“What are you doing?” He asked.

“Studying.” I paused and yawn. “I have an exam tomorrow, and I’m really really tired.” I say closing my eyes.

“You should rest; just continue that tomorrow morning…” I close my book, following his advice and lay it beside my side table. I adjust my head on my pillow and lie comfortably on it. “Goodnight Gyu.”

“I probably should… Goodnight.” I say.

I must have fallen asleep in about two minutes, because the next thing I know, I open my eyes and the clock says it’s four in the morning and I have 15 missed calls all from Ha Sul Jung— it scared me, coz usually she won’t do this and now I’m worried.

Ha Sul Jung is a high school friend; the third wheel on our duo, of course mine and the Kim jonghyun. 

She is a close friend of ours, but I cannot say that she’s a ‘best friend’. We met her on our last year of high school, when she transferred there. In instant the three of us clicked. Sul Jung, sort of became the substitute of Jonghyun when he skips class just to attend his training.

Despite of that, the kind-hearted, innocent Sul Jung did not care, she did not even take it against us, and she even gave me the warm feeling of having a sister and the warm feeling of having a girl as a best friend – of course it changed a little, because there are secrets that cannot and should not be known by the Kim Jonghyun.

I sat on my bed and dial her phone, thinking that I, at least should make an effort to explain why I had not answer her and would just tell her to call me back again, probably when the king sun is out and shinning.

But my plan seems to fail when she answer it on the first ring.

“Yobo—” I was immediately cut by her disturbing loud bawl.

“Nam Gyu.” She shrieked followed by a sob –and it broke my heart hearing it from her. She starts crying—I mean really crying and I have never ever seen her cry, so I’m feeling responsible, panicky and hysteria (all at the same time) about this.

So I did what a good friend would do, I say over the phone, “Let’s meet up later.”

---

A faint light from the outside illuminated the whole place. I looked at it as I raise the cup closer to my lips and my mind begins to drift away back to memory lane.

-

“Kwon Nam Gyu.”

My heart skips a beat as he calls my name. He was panting and his voice has this spec of needy and pleading. It sent shiver on my nape that in instant when he say my name, I gasp silently and subsequently my eyes grew wide. At a snail’s pace, I hid my phone behind my back and fixed my face before I turn to him.

For the first time in my life, I want to have some breathing space, with that I mean something that at least I should keep for myself, a secret. As far as I know, I have never kept anything from Jonghyun, it’s not that I’m hiding things from him, I just don’t want him to have this idea that his fellow trainee name Lee Jinki and I have this ‘thing’ going on because we are having this constant communication.

The REAL thing is, Jinki-ssi had become my tutor in math. Jonghyun and I both have the same weakness and that is we both hate math, the worst is he thinks that I am much worse than him – which obviously I always deny (like duh! Isn’t it hard to accept that someone is dumb as you think he’s smarter between the two of you?)

I just don’t want Jonghyun to know that I’ve been meeting Jinki-ssi for the past few days (or weeks) because I know he would brag about it and would just tell me that I am burden towards his ‘new’ friend. But hey, it’s not my idea on the first place, Jinki-ssi had been the one who offered it to me, I just sort of bit the bait, besides I should not the let the opportunity passed by, right? After all, I find Jinki-ssi attractive.

Ooops! Did I just say that? Okay, maybe I did. But let’s forget about it.

“Hi, Jonghyun.” I say, sounding cheery, hiding the fact that on the split second when I turn my back to face him, I’ve thought of these stuffs. His eyes were distress like something has been bothering him and it caused me alarm. I pull my hanky and wipe it on his face. “Are you okay? Or did you go some running again?” even as I was saying it, I was getting drawn to his presence; the sheen sweat on his forehead, how he was taking slightly shorter breaths. 

I giggled but he did not say a thing. I focused on my hand as it moves down his face, wiping every glist of sweat and I know he’s watching me, I smile.

Jonghyun did not answer my question; instead he held my wrist and our gaze were lock on each other. “I have something to tell you.” I can clearly say that he’s serious and I have no time and right to question him if this is something important. 

“Now?” I ask, though obviously is it a stupid question. He’s my best f