rating: G

genre: romance

word count: approx. 500+

Soojung laid on her side, her body wrapped under several blankets and her toes curled in her favorite pair of blue fuzzy socks pulled over the ends of her black tights. She was wearing one of his sweaters; the red, white, and grey striped one with dark grey oval patches covering the elbows. It smelled like a combination of laundry detergent and boy. This boy, lying on his stomach a little across from her on the bed with his head resting on his folded arms, his eyes closed.

Soojung stared at him intently. She examined the lines of his face, marveling at every feature: his high cheekbones, his plump lips, and even the small bump on the bridge of his nose (which she thought was rather cute). He looked so peaceful when he was asleep – and much younger, too. Behind the sharp, masculine lines, Soojung saw a bit of the boy she knew from when they were kids, innocent and filled with so much optimism; untouched by the stress of being one twelfth of one of South Korea's most popular boy groups to date.

He didn't have to tell her how hard it was for him. Soojung could read it on the dark circles adorning his face. Sometimes she wonders what it would have been like if they both pursued normal interests – normal as in not-destined-for-the-public-spotlight. Soojung loves performing, but she would be lying if there weren't moments when she wished she had chosen something else. All that time dedicated to recording songs in the studio, even more time put into rehearsing choreography right after, and then all the traveling they had to do in order to promote the said song with the said choreography – it was all very daunting, now that she thinks of it.

But then Soojung remembers: without this life, she wouldn't have met him. She wouldn't have known that past his quiet and timid demeanor was a fierce performer who lit up the stage with every movement and every expression he made. She wouldn't have seen him smile at her as they passed each other in the halls, and again when he intentionally ran into her a second time to ask her out on their first date. She wouldn't have had her first kiss or had seen the funny look on his face after he had pulled away, sheepish yet somehow proud and incredibly victorious. She wouldn't have known what it was like to fall in love with someone over and over again – and to have him fall in love with her the same way.

It only took a moment for Soojung to remind herself of these things, and another moment for all of her doubts to fade away suddenly like an odd dream. She didn't need to wonder what it would be like if they had each chosen different paths because really, there was no alternative; and she doubts there could ever be one.

He was all she could ever need. He was all that it took to make her life worthwhile.

author's note: Would you believe me if I said this was supposed to be for Kai's birthday? XD I know it's typical for kaistal fics to have an element of angst/conflict, but angst was never my strong suit. I'm more of a hoplessly-hopeful romantic cheese-lover because - well, I think cheese is gouda. Now I sincerely hope that none of you are lactose intolerant because I totally just went there.

See you guys again at the next update! - Ella