frequent profanity.

Kyungsoo had dreamed of it as something running along the lines of grand. Romantic, sure. Hell, he would even settle for miraculously coincidential.

 

But where he met Jongin was at work. In his grey drab waiter uniform.

 

"Holy Kyungsoo, I think this is the first time I've seen you actually look in the mirror to fix your hair," Chanyeol noted, his mouth practically agape on its hinges. "DUDE, YOU DIDN'T EVEN FIX YOUR HAIR FOR MY ING BIRTHDAY PARTY."

 

"Shut the up, I've only known you for approximately 18 months," Kyungsoo panics, fixing his fringes with the awkward precision of inexperienced fingers.

 

"And he's my ex-- no. Technically, we never actually broke up but you know."

 

"Ohhhh. Omg, I get this." Chanyeol's eyes light up with the arrival if his sudden enlightenment.

"You're going to get your little out there in that y waiter outfit and show this guy that he's the one who got the short end of the stick-- assuming this guy has a masochist streak in him. Holy, wait! Why don't I pretend to be your amazingly hot boyfriend and get this guy flaming jealous. What do you say?"

 

Kyungsoo stops momentarily to glare at Chanyeol.

 

"I just love how you assumed he was the one who broke up with me."

 

"Well, our sweet sweet Kyungsoo wouldn't."

 

 

"His dad did."

 

It's blunt, but it's also the truth.

 

 

 

"Oh."

 

 

"And I still love him."

 

 

Chanyeol shoots him a look.

 

"This sounds vaguely like a soap opera."

 

 

Kyungsoo sighs, plopping down on the table.

 

"I know right... I'm so messed up."

 

"But I mean like, sure, if you really like this guy, I could help you guys get back together. If you want," Chanyeol looks at him cautiously.

 

"Would you?"

 

His eyes grow wide, and they shoot stars.

 

"Yes, juuust like that. And add a little aeygo and I'm sure Mr. Ex will fall right back in love with you."

 

Chanyeol reaches over to mildly ruffle Kyungsoo's hair, but his hand grabs the intruder before it even lands on his head.

 

 

 

 

He's sitting there, nose deep into the plastic menu, hair combed back, and arms fitted in a crisp black suit. Damn. He looks so good, too good even. Good enough that Kyungsoo wonders if life's been doing wonders for him after that day.

 

Kyungsoo turns back to Chanyeol with a nervous expression.

 

He's not alone either, Jongin is sitting with two other men in suits and one woman in the classic secretary outfit, a professional blouse coupled with a pencil skirt, making small talk over four glasses of ice cold water.

 

Chanyeol makes the "go ahead" motion while frantically gesticulating with his hands.

 

 

Kyungsoo makes his way over, the doubt and nervousness steadily building until he was worried his voice would only croak, failing to pronounce words.

 

 

 

Then, strangely, all of the sudden....

 

 

 

he thinks that this is a dream.

 

Yes, it seems very likely. So likely that Kyungsoo is sure that he could reach out and touch the tangible pictures rolling out in front of him like a film.

 

For two years, and Jongin's just sitting there, in front of him.

 

Yes this was quite possibly just an oasis, like one of those impossibly beautiful illusions promiscuously flaunting itself  in the middle of the dry empty desert.

 

 

 

But no!

 

He can feel the solid heavy dishes right between his fingers, and he can smell the deeply scented air filled with years of hard work and sincere cooking always present in the restaurant.

 

He wants to scream, yell, do anything, but when he opens his mouth:

 

"Urghdswhat would you uh like today?"

 

"A moment please," Jongin raises one elegant finger without gazing up from the menu.

 

 

Well.

 

 

This was not what he had imagined at all, but it was probably because Jongin hasn't looked up at him yet. He can wait.

 

As he continues to wait impatiently, at that very second, Kyungsoo imagines everything he's ever thought and dreamt of spiraling down the dirty drain.

 

And he thinks he's practically burning with embarrassment while standing there, fire at his cheeks.

 

"Well um, I'll just take the braised beef and broccoli. And the shrimp. And also this corn and egg soup," the first man notes, smiling haughtily at Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo wants to punch (of course not literally...) that smile right off his face.

 

"Sure, and you?" the forced smile has become a mask so natural to wear, he doesn't realize it's even there.

 

"I'd just like the fried chicken. A fast food restaurant like this has fried chicken right?" he mocks, looking around at the decorative red characters on the pristine walls.

 

"Why'd you even bother recommend such a lower-class feeding factory, Mr. Kim Jongin?"

 

Jongin, fortunately, ignores his very words, and looks up with a dazzling smile.

 

 "I'd like anything the cook has to give me."

 

And with that he closes the menu and offers it back to Kyungsoo before re-engaging the others in a talk about current finances and budget plans.

 

Kyungsoo is left completely and utterly blown away.

 

How could he?

 

A dashing image in his mind appears, where he grabs Jongin by the lower throat and forces him to say it. Just say it. Say his ing name, goddamn it.

 

He couldn't possibly not recognize him right?

 

Kyungsoo had been seriously considering it when the woman suddenly piped up,

"If you're waiting for my order, I'm fine with some water. Thanks."

 

He stares at her, realizing it was a secret hint to leave, and he reluctantly turns to go, still bewildered and frustrated.

 

 

 

"Why? What happened?"

 

"Nothing."

 

"Aw, come onnnn. Just say it."

 

"Dude. Nothing. Okay? Nothing happened."

 

 

 

Kyungsoo throws down the order on the table and scowls.

 

 

"Hey, two girls just came in to table two," Kris, waitor two, ducks in through the doorway. "And I cant. Like I cant ing put up with those es."

 

"Sure," Kyungsoo says with a sigh.

 

 

"Table five with the ex, Kyungsoo." Chanyeol hands over three dishes, and Kyungsoo yells out to Kris in the back room, "What about taking table five for me?"

 

"Nah we ran out of garlic cloves, and I cant ing speak to bastards in suits dissing this place."

 

"."

 

"What was that?"

 

"Nothing important."

 

 

 

Kyungsoo finally decides to bring out the dishes, after Chanyeol complains about the food becoming cold, and he literally drags his feet across the room to where Jongin and the bastards are now chatting about exmanagers.

 

"Here you go."

 

"Could you fill up my tea cup, thanks. And can I opt for green tea instead of chrysanthemum? Also. These chopsticks are not the same color."

 

"Sure, i would love to help you with that," Kyungsoo smiles tightly.

 

"Thanks. Eh, service ain't that bad I guess. And hey... I did not notice before but... You're pretty hot, by the way."

 

Man number one winks at him greasily, and Kyungsoo thinks he's just encountered indigestion.

 

Man two chokes on the chrysanthemum tea, and the woman is absolutely horrified.

 

But Kyungsoo wants to ing laugh out loud. Yes, yes baby. Choke on that tea. You deserve that at the very least.

 

He makes sure to sashay back through the kitchen.

 

But as the dishes continually get dished out, Jongin becomes even more cold towards him.

 

 

 

"Okay, you know what? Xiumin!"

 

"Yes?" a bright eyed man peeks out through the back door.

 

"I'm going to be gone for a few minutes, so here's the order you need to cook."

 

"What the ? But I'm paid to mop the floors."

 

", just scramble some eggs, you can do that right?"

 

"Um...not really...but ok."

 

 

Chanyeol saunters out of the kitchen, chin pointed upwards and shoulders set on a horizontal axis.

 

 

When he reaches table five where Kyungsoo is pouring water for the secretary woman, Chanyeol grabs Kyungsoo by the shoulders and plants a mushy kiss on his cheek.

 

"Kyungie-poo! Where were you? I missed you soooooooooo much, bae."

 

This time, everyone at the table chokes, and man number two has shot rice mixed with saliva across the table. Woman screams.

 

"What the , off Chanyeol." Kyungsoo hisses.

 

"Hey, im doing you a favor here," he whispers back.

 

"You're so cute, Kyungie!"

 

Chanyeol grabs Kyungsoo again and slobbers his lips over the younger's.

 

 

"THE PDA HERE. OH MY ING GAWD. JUST GET A ROOM FILTHY BASTARDS." the woman screams, and Jongin, finally, stares with his mouth agape.

 

Finally.

 

Isn't this what Kyungsoo really wanted? A reaction of surprise?

 

Well he was a damn idiot.

 

Kyungsoo doesn't say a word.

 

He pushes Chanyeol forcibly back and briskly walks into the kitchen, where he throws on his coat, and leaves the restaurant.

 

 

"Aw, I really ed up didn't I?" Chanyeol groans.

 

"Uh yeah. You did. Pretty badly. I would expect a text message informing you of your broken relationship, to be honest." Man number one shakes his head in shame.

 

"Aw damn. Kyungsoo was a great best friend."

 

"...best friend?"

 

They all stare.

 

"...nevermind." Chanyeol stares back and heads back to the kitchen.

 

 

 

"Xiumin, ! What is this brown !?"

 

 

 

"You know what? This is so stupid, so stupid. Kyungsoo you're so stupid."

 

He's groaning and hitting himself on the head.

 

"What did I tell you huh? I told you that Jongin wouldn't give a flying about you, and I was dead right," he hits himself on the head again.

 

Kyungsoo collapses on the bed, his body completely flopping in on itself.

 

He stares at the ceiling, the thin cracks edging out from the corners of his room.

 

Well, wasn't this ridiculous?

 

Forget this, Kyungsoo was going to draw a huge ing masterpiece and get over Kim ing Jongin.

 

Two years was enough.

 

If he waited two entire years for someone who wasn't even going to look at him, he was surely a very ignorant--

 

 

 

 

There was a knock on the door.

 

Kyungsoo groans. "I don't want any ing cookies, screw you."

 

But the knock comes again, and Kyungsoo finally crawls out of bed, clearly and thoroughly pissed off.

 

"What the hell do you want."

 

Kyungsoo flings open the door and glares at...

 

 

He slams the door back shut.

 

 

"I'm sorry..."

 

The voice is down with guilt, and it sounds like its almost physically right next to him. The urge to look back and make sure Jongin wasn't right there beside him comes expectedly, but Kyungsoo doesn't budge.

 

"For what?" Kyungsoo finally shouts out, unable to resist Jongin's prompt.

 

But oh he was so cruel.

 

How could he show up like this?

 

After crushing his heart into smithereens on purpose, he was going to piece it back together again.

 

Jongin had to be simply playing with him.

 

"For the last two years."

 

There is silence, in which Kyungsoo feels that his life that ended abruptly two years ago began to start rolling on its old rusty wheels again. Nostalgia ghosts between the air particles, and he almost makes the mistake of thinking that everything was going to be just like the way it used to be.

 

But no.

 

Jongin was still in the red for completely overlooking Kyungsoo's existence. And he did not understand.

 

Something was so radically changed; he didn't know how to confront Jongin and his old memories standing in front of him.

 

But there was still his love lingering in there somewhere. Jongin had claimed it, and Kyungsoo couldn't take it back, not even in the years Jongin had disappeared.

 

"Kyungsoo... What do you think about...us?"

 

"Not much anymore."

 

Even Kyungsoo himself can hear the lie ringing blatantly in his own voice.

 

"Tell me seriously. I don't care, think about it. Think about it for 15 minutes, I'll wait."

 

"But everything is different.....What do you want me to say?"

 

He did not understand this at all. Why was Jongin doing this?

 

"No just think about it for 15 minutes."

 

"But what I don't understand is the reason why you did not recognize me before. Two entire years Jongin. And you wouldnt even recognize me. How do you think I felt? Why didn't you give me even  a sign?"

 

"Oh come on. I was at a business meet up... You didn't actually expect me to embrace you then did you?"

 

Kyungsoo almost recoils at the tone of his voice.

 

"Oh I see how it is. So now your company position is worth way more than me."

 

"You know how it is... Stop being selfish, Kyungsoo."

 

"What selfishness?! I just wanted something, at least maybe a hi, and you wouldn't even look at me! Is that really what you think of me? Am I really that beneath you to the point where you can't even... I may seem like I'm exaggerating, but if I was the one who completely ignored you..."

 

The burden was now out there. Jongin and his "upper-class" family.

 

Who was Kyungsoo anyways? One out of a millon average middle class citizens?

 

 

"All you had to do was wait!"

 

 

 

 

"...you're different, Jongin."

 

Kyungsoo realizes it as the words appear into the conversation,

 

 

 

and Jongin takes the dagger right to his heart.

 

 

"Well so are you. Are you really going to do this Kyungsoo? This is so dumb to fight over! Just open up and let me talk to you."

 

"What do you want?"

 

"...to see you again... At the very least. Because even if we're different, Kyungsoo, we're still the same. And I want to see if...my feelings are still true. I mean that with sincerity."

 

 

"We're talking right now."

 

Kyungsoo's heart is crumbling, like the brick house that was once thought to be so sure.

 

To see if his feelings were still true?

 

It was all too familiar again, his unrequited love.

 

To be honest, he had thought about it before. The situation where Jongin no longer loves him back.

 

It was like this checkmate, Kyungsoo thinks miserably. This checkmate where Jongin knows with deadly accuracy what his options are and he chooses to block Kyungsoo. He's unable to advance, to touch him. To confront him. He's stuck in the maze. He's forced to give up.

 

"Seriously..." Jongin fumbles with the doorknob and knocks a few dozen more times, before finally slumping against the cold heavy door.

 

"Whatever. Fine. If that's how you want it."

 

Jongin shrugs, and strolls towards the elevators.

 

 

"I'll just try the other way."

---

i feel as if this ends on a dischord.
Yessssss, this chapter is sooooooo different from normal oh my goodness, i know.
 

but i feel like it fits the idea how they're both different. And Jongin is being absolutely honest when he means that he doesn't know if they can be together again. But uh, i think it'll all turn out ok ;)

there's probably one or two more chapters honestly, so we're nearing the end !! And of course, I will be including a epilogue, in which I sum up every single character that has appeared so far :) Sounds like it will be fun.
i can't say yet that i'm feeling immensely sad....but i do think that i will be taking those words back way too soon.