Wrong (Part Two)

Word Count: 1648

 

 Boram was not one to push her blame onto others but she hated her. For an entire year, even before everything went wrong in her group, she was miserable, pathetic and sorrier than she had been her entire life. Logic was thrown out of the window every time Boram saw her grinning, laughing, having fun with Tiffany with an 'f'. Disgusting.

 "If you glare any harder, you'll set the TV on fire," Jiyeon said nudging the older girl to give her more space.

 "Go away. Do I bug every time you watch those daily dramas? No? Get lost."

Jiyeon rolled her eyes. "How can you compare that to this?"

 "Like I just did," Boram replied kicking at the other girl and missing because she was not looking.

 "Stop bullying me,"

 "Leave me alone before I break your umbrella."

Jiyeon giggled even though the joke had been told and retold plenty of times. Boram turned her attention back to the group that was performing their latest songs. A rubbish song that was worse than T-ara's own rubbish songs.

 "It's not healthy. Your obsession, unnie,"

 Boram snorted. The way Jiyeon spoke you would think all she ever did was that. This was one of the few times they had the time to watch any TV. Looking online was out of the question because somehow she would end up searching her group instead. Stupid people. Boram would bet her watch that the same ones who hated them liked that song.

 "It's such a good song," Jiyeon said bobbing her head.

 "A good song? It's an incoherent mess,"

 "Since when are you an expert?" Jiyeon shot back incredulously.

 "Whatever, I'm going to sleep," Boram snapped. Deep down she knew she should not have but she was angry enough not to care. She'll get over it. Unfortunately, Eunjung was standing by the kitchen watching.

 "Was that necessary?"

 "Was what necessary?"

Not willing to be drawn into an argument, Eunjung went to join the youngest member. Once again there was another twinge of guilt. Oh well, she'll get over it. Boram went to the room she shared with Jihyun. That arrangement favoured her more because Jihyun rarely asked her questions or judged her and frankly, it was getting irritating seeing the looks on everyone's face.

 "Screw them," she muttered slamming the door. 

 "Screw who?" Jihyun said. She was rummaging her dresser. Boram suspected that she had an ability to hear even the smallest sounds or maybe she was louder than she thought.

 "No one," Boram replied. Everyone. "So, you're going on a date?"

 "Not really a date but I'm meeting someone."

 "So he is coming here to pick you up?" Boram asked. She wondered why she wanted to know when she had stop showing interest a while ago.

 "No, she isn't coming here," Jihyun answered pulling out a fistful of dresses. "And no, I'm not gay or anything like that. Just someone who... I'm meeting I guess."

 Boram rolled her eyes and sat on her bed. It was a good thing the group members had made little fuss about homouality. However, Boram was absolutely sure they were afraid she would get attracted to one of them. Lately whenever they used their new dorm rooms or the hotel rooms, they would change in the bathroom or, in Jihyun's case, in another room. Insulting.

 "Why do you look so angry?"

 "Why are you asking so many questions today?"

 "I'm just a bit nervous that's all,"

Jihyun nervous? Since when? 

 "Who are you seeing or meeting?"

Jihyun shook her head and she walked out of the holding the dress she had chosen. Boram grit her teeth but said nothing. Right now more than ever, Boram hated Taeyeon.

 

~~~~~~

 Boram had seen Taeyeon plenty of times before. They had promoted songs at the same time more than once and even went to the same places. It was not like they had talked and the only thing they had in common was In Jung so their encounters were always awkward. Boram had come in for their last recording on Music Core after her group members. Her arm was still hurting where the needle pricked it. Shrek had given her a few more minutes to rest after rehydrating but Boram felt even worse. She was dizzy and felt nauseous. None of the show's staff would help her because she ought to know by now. Somehow, Boram found herself standing in front of the Girls' Generation dressing room. She figured Soonkyu would know where her dressing room was. The room was empty except for one stylist who was washing her hands.

 "Excuse me," Boram said weakly. The lady looked behind for a second and quickly turned the faucet off. "Do you know where T-ara's room is?"

 "Yeah, it's down the-"

 "Minnie, have you seen Seo's gloss?" a voice behind her interrupted. "Oh hey, Boram."

  "Taeyeon-ssi." Boram said shortly. The only people who could ignore the formalities were her group members.

 "What are you doing here?" Taeyeon asked unfazed.

 "She wanted to find her dressing room," the stylist said, going back to cleaning her hands.

 "Oh, I'll show you,"

Boram felt herself being spun around and it took her entire will power not to hurl. Her vision went haywire for a second before she found herself facing a stone face Taeyeon.

 "Don't do that please."

 "Do you want me to get your manager?"

 "No, I'm late already. Just show me-"

 "You look really sick, Boram."

 "Boram-ssi," Boram corrected. "It's okay, though. I can take this, um, pill-can't remember its name- and I'll be fine."

Taeyeon became silent. She held Boram's waist tightly and led them. The dressing room was a few doors away. After thanking her, Boram opened the door to enter.

 "Call me."

 "Hmm?" Boram was sure she was hearing things. 

 "Soyeon has my number so call me."

She walked away and was gone before Boram could reply.

 

~~~~~~

 Bossy . Boram wiped her face and buried it into her pillow. She could not sleep. Every time she closed her eyes, she would remember and it hurt. If you push everything down, you'll never truly get over her. Her therapist was the worst, Boram decided, but she had a good point. It has been too long and frankly, she needed less problems. Don't push everything down? Fine.

 

~~~~~~

 Boram never called even though she had the other girl's phone number already. Not only would she not know what to say but she did not feel the need. She never told the other members. Three weeks later, while on their way for a photo-shoot, Boram received a call from the last person she wanted. 

 "What?" In Jung said when Boram groaned. "Oh, it's Tae. Answer it."

 "You gave her my number?"

 "Just answer it."

Bracing herself, Boram pressed the answer button. "H-hello?"

 "Boram-ssi! See I remembered. Anyways, I asked Jungie for your number because you never called."

 "About that, you see-"

 "Oh I know. Jungie told me. A-any-um, how are you?" Taeyeon asked.

 "Better than when you last saw me." Boram said remembering how her skin looked almost grey. They had to put more BB cream on her than usual.

 "I saw you on Monday but you didn't notice me." 

 "You mean at MBC?"

 "Yeah! Fany and Sica had a show and I tagged along. You were so pretty."

Boram flushed not knowing what to say. In Jung giggled and Boram realised she was listening in.

 "Who was that?"

 "Jiyeon did something stupid."

 "Anyways, can we meet? You and me, I mean."

Boram sent pleading look to her closest friend who was covering with both to keep from laughing out loud.

 "S-sure. How about...hold on a second, I'm checking my schedule."

 "Any time is fine."

The only time Boram had free for the next one month was ten o'clock at night the following week. When she told Taeyeon, the latter went silent for a whole minute.

 "I think she's drunk," In Jung whispered when she finally calmed down. That could explain the boldness and the stutters.

 "Boram, are you still there? It's a date! I checked and I'm free then. There is this restaurant by Chandong. It's really cozy and has this chocolate fountain. I'll text you the address, okay?"

 "Yeah, sure."

 "Who was it?" Sunyoung asked. She had been eavesdropping as well. Boram did not know how she did not notice when the younger girl was leaning in closely from the back. "I couldn't place the voice."

 "Taeyeon," In Jung answered gleefully. "They are having a date."

Jiyeon barked out a laugh while Eunjung and Sunyoung exchanged looks. Jihyun was, thankfully, sleeping.

 "A date, huh?" Eunjung said trying to sound casual.

 "I'm just meeting her because she wants to. Why are you so pale?"

  "No!" Sunyoung yelled. Boram widened her eyes and moved away slightly. "Oh, sorry. I was in the moment."

Everyone shrugged already used to her behaviour. Boram shook her head. Why were they acting so weird?

 "You guys need to chill." Jiyeon said chuckling. She had regained colour and looked energetic. Eunjung removed the needle from her arm and stored the IV bag away in the compartment.

 "I miss Hwayoung. She's so much more normal than you guys." Boram said. Jiyeon and In Jung snorted at the same time and the whole van went comfortably quiet.

 

~~~~~~

 "Hey, Boram, we're ordering some food. You want anything?" In Jung said softly. Boram nodded her head but kept her face buried. "Do I order for you?"

She nodded her head again and then she was alone. A part of her wished she could go to her group members but she had a habit of souring the mood these days. Letting go isn't easy, the therapist had told her. She scoffed then but now, especially since she was this emotionally exhausted, she wanted to try.

 

 

 

Author's Note:

I'm still deciding whether I should end it in the next one shot but the two of them will have a confrontation. The flashback was in 2011 for Cry Cry.  I would prolly do that. Anyways, tell me what you think