Soundtrack: Lovers in Japan - Coldplay

This diary belongs to Lee Seunghyun

Page: 15

25-August-2021

Kyoto city awoke with grace, stained with brilliant, vibrant colors: red, vermillion lips, white yellow sunbeams streaking down the blue blanket around our bodies, green leaves scattered across the sky. Jiyong got closer to me and murmured incoherent things. He blinked and murmured too many “I love you’s” behind my ear. My eyes wandered around with a hazy blur, because of the beauty that particular moment reflected.

We reached Uzumasa station around nine in the morning, still a little bit sleepy. Dressed with thin-layered clothes, caps over our heads and short pants that allowed the refreshing breeze of morning caress our skins.  Today was Jiyong again, the one who chose the places we were going to visit. He spent half the night browsing on the computer “interesting” and “cool” places to visit in Kyoto.

So after walking for 10 minutes we arrived at the Toei Uzumasa Park (Kyoto Studio Park). For Jiyong, the greatest place on earth. For me, another interesting experience, that I would cherish the seconds of.

The park recreates with its elaborated facades, its buildings and decorations a town from the Edo period. And its attractiveness recalls in its amazing historical scenarios, where sometimes, historical movies and dramas are filmed.

“Ri, I think we made a mistake by coming here,” he said while his face twisted in regret, his eyes focused on the park leaflet between his hands. “I really want to visit every single place in here,” he explained himself looking at me.

“Then we’ll visit every single place in here,” I said, repeating the exact same words he said, jokingly. He smiled in return, as if we both shared a secret, and took my hand.

“You are so going to regret that,” he threatened me with a tinge of a smile, pulling me from my hand.

We spent the entire morning roaming around the park, watching the beautiful scenarios with their particular styles and vibes. It was as if we were traveling through time: the wind, the sun, the stones under our shoes seemed to change at the same time as the decorations in front of our eyes.

Buildings that shifted faces, large traditional Japanese streets, wood and colorful bridges. Contrasting with shadows, history and magic intertwined. Women with their reddish lips, paled faces and bright kimonos walking without care, some acrobats fighting and the sable ratting flying across the air. Everything appeared and disappeared, wrapping us in a magical melody of movements and images.

 We even dressed ourselves as Samurais. You know? With that kind of ridiculous attire, our faces covered and all. And even if I want to deny the fact I did that, there was a camera hanging from Jiyong’s neck that took every possible evidence of it.

We visited the Anime museum inside the park. Well, more like, he dragged me to it. And with a proud grin over his face, he showed me and explained me everything about those weird, unknown for me characters; their stories, their books, the movies and all those things.

Before knowing Jiyong, those things were for me childish. But now I am not sure anymore, I feel my soul has been dragged down, my thoughts refreshed and enlivened. I don’t know anymore what young and old means; the strong distinction I once placed between them both started to fade away the day I met him.

“Ji,” I interrupted his explanations. He detached his eyes from the picture of a girl with blue strange hair in the wall and gazed at me with a face divided between discontent and surprise.

“Thank you,” I said, pulling him close to me “Just, thank you.”

“What are you thanking me for?” he asked confused.

“For nothing special, just because,” I answered caressing his baffled face “How did you start liking this things?” I asked, looking around at the walls, without releasing Jiyong from my arms.

“Huh? I guess it all started when I got warded for the first time. I had to spend most of the nights alone in my room, and at that hour there was a Japanese channel that used to stream anime and movies,” he explained, focusing his eyes in an unspecific spot of my shirt. “First it was because I felt bored and alone, and my like for it kind of grew until I ended up loving it.” He explained, but I saw how a flash of sadness crossed his face and how he tried to hide it from me. 

“There is something else, right?” I said, thinking out loud. Jiyong lifted his eyes and looked at me with guilt before nodding shyly with his head.

“It… it was a time I really wanted to escape from this. And these things allowed me to live a different life. Lives that were distinct from this one,” he said, placing his left hand over his chest, right above his heart. “The first months were very difficult, I was scared and I felt unsure and didn’t understand what was happening and why it had to be me. It was… difficult. You can’t just accept those things; you have to grow up, strengthen your faith and confidence to a point it doesn’t hurt anymore. These things somehow helped me overcome those times.”

“And now?” I asked him, almost in a breathy whisper.

“Now it doesn’t hurt anymore. I guess I am accustomed now,” he replied, tightening the grip of our hands and giving me a sad smile. “Now I accept it.” His eyes darted and penetrated to my soul, conveying me a silent message. “And you should accept it too.”

I shook my head in denial and said with strength, with that kind of voice one uses when saying something real, with that voice used for saying a truth. “I can’t Ji. I don’t want to accustom myself to watch you dying.”

He nodded silently, his shoulders slouching with an invisible weight, and sighed between my arms. “I guess that is how it’s supposed to be.” 

In the afternoon we went to Maruyama Park, to watch the cherry blossoms trees and to lose our time with no more plans inside our heads. Jiyong was feeling tired, so we just sat over one of the many red benches placed throughout the park. He opened his notebook and detached himself from our surroundings, focused on his pen and his writing. I laid my head over his lap, and watched in silence at the cherry blossoms trees above us and his face filled with concentration. Cooed by the sound of his pen and his rhythmic breathing, harmonized by the hushing of the leaves.

“What are you writing?” I asked him after an hour or two of pure silence.

“Just silly things” he answered, shrugging with indifference.

“Read it to me,” I asked him, trying to grab the notebook. But he was faster than me, and placed it out of my reach.

“No, it’s bad. Stop!” he said, trying to stop me from fighting to reach the notebook.

“Let me hear it, please Ji,” I begged, straightening over the bench and looking at him with pleading eyes. “I want to know what you are thinking.”

He struggled for a while, his eyes showing confusion and doubts, until he sighed defeated and gave the notebook to me, still hesitant. “It is not good.” He repeated. "And I didn't write much, though."

“Please don’t vanish. Please don’t vanish.

Please stop the time at this summer.

I’m still holding to these memories.

Whether is autumn, winter or spring.

For eternity, you are my heaven.”

I lifted my eyes towards him after I finished reading the lyrics. His eyes were looking at the ground unsure, his shoulders fallen with melancholy. I approached myself to him, and returned his notebook over his lap in silence. I didn’t say anything. I knew there was anything I could say, so I just placed my head over his shoulder. As I will always believe, silence is sometimes more powerful than anything else, silence can crawl into the unreachable cracks and fill them, holding the fragments together.

The night soon started to appear over the sky and with it, the people started to gather around us: families, couples, kids and old people, everyone looking up at the dark sky.

Just before midnight the sky began to be invaded by some flickering lanterns, flying slowly moved by the summer wind. Each one of the lanterns represented one already gone human being, the flickering soul of a memory. It was the lantern festival from the Yosaka Shrine.

I cried in silence, staring at the beautiful lights over the sky. I watched at Jiyong, his eyes reflected those lights and his cheeks were stained with tears. I kissed his soft pale face and murmured to his ear.

“You are my heaven too, Ji,” He looked at me in surprise, with eyes that flickered stronger that any other light over our heads. “And I will never go away, no matter how hard things may be.” 

While I watched those lanterns suspended in the air, I imagined the fatherly smile of that old guy from room 405 smiling at me, up above in the sky. One of those lanterns must have been him conveying me that message he told me once before dying, a message that is buried inside my head. A message now I comprehend.

“Heaven lies before and not after.” 

I smiled at the sky.

Lee SH

 Hi there! Sorry for being away for such a long time... but me and mikahina are back again into this story, and will be pretty active for this next weeks ^.^ This story is comming to an end. There's only 5 chapters more till it ends. Please stay with us! Thank so much to the new suscribers and new readers! Please leave a comment about your thoughts on this story. And again, I'm so grateful for having such amazing readers, subscribers and friends in here!

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