Does the name of this chapter make you nervous? Buhaha

I'm not sure what woke me up. Sunlight was flooding the room while various city noises wafted up from the street. I yawned and rubbed my groggy eyes. As my brain fully woke up, a wave of memories from last night crashed over me. It was enough to steal my breath. 

Staring up at the ceiling, I reminded myself that running away was no longer an option. I couldn't waver any more. It wasn't fair to Joon Hee. I had to accept that I was...well...I was gay now. I was in love with Joon Hee. We had crossed that final line between friends and lovers, last night. 

It made panic rise into my chest, and yet, it made me comfortably warm. This was the person who had loved me unconditionally and unselfishly for over a decade. How could I do anything other than love him back? Shi Won had helped me thru the loss of my parents. Joon Hee had helped fill my heart. I felt so loved when I was near him. It was what my relationship with Shi Won had been lacking.

The only reason my desire ,for a life long relationship with Joon Hee ,scared me was the fear of reactions from those close to us. Shi Won was accepting and supportive of us, but who knew what others would do.

I was so lost inside my own head, that I hadn't realized Joon Hee wasn't sleeping next to me. Had he run off because he was afraid I regretted last night? Or had he left because he regretted last night? Was my performance that bad?

I dragged myself out of bed and out of the bedroom. After I exited the bathroom, I noticed the aroma of bacon. At first, I thought I was losing my mind, but no. There was bacon. I stepped into the kitchen.

I was treated to the sight of Joon Hee frying bacon on the range while wearing his boxers and T-shirt. Relief washed over me and not just because bacon was in my future. At moments like these, there was no doubt in my mind that I loved this man. Doubt would most likely pop up later, but right now I was just incredibly in love.

He hadn't noticed my presence yet. At the risk of getting burned by hot grease, I silently approached the chef and wrapped my arms around him. 

"Morning, handsome." I said before kissing his neck and cheek.

"Careful!" He was startled a bit, holding up the spatula. "You're lucky I wasn't holding a knife!"

"I'm just lucky you're here." I said, honey sweet, as I went back to kissing him.

"My word, that's cheesy!" He giggled.

"And you love it." 

"Every bit." He agreed. I wasn't sure why I kept comparing Joon Hee to Shi Won--well, maybe I was sure why, but not sure when I'd finally stop doing that. Shi Won was not romantic and did not appreciate cheesiness. Joon Hee did and I loved that. I loved that he wanted my attention and appreciated any kind gesture from me. It made me feel wanted and important. I wonder if I made him feel that way.

"Can I drop the cheesiness for a minute and ask you something serious?" I asked before I started on his neck.

"Don't give me a hickey!" He turned his head to stop me.

"Sorry." I nuzzled him, instead.

"What did you want to ask?" He took the bacon out of the pan and laid it on a paper towel lined plate.

"Other than last night, do I do anything good for you? I mean, do you feel like I really do love you? Do I do anything to prove it?"

He paused, then set the spatula down and turned to face me. He gave my lips a simple but lingering kiss and smiled at me.

"Asking that proves a lot." He said, playing with my hair. "Now, go sit down and let's eat breakfast."

We were happily eating when my phone started making noise. A text from my brother.

-Is Joon Hee still alive?-

I rolled my eyes.

"What is it?" Joon Hee asked between bites.

"My stupid brother."

-Did you have fun going on a date with two women last night?- I replied to Tae Woong.

-One of those women was for you.-

-Dude. Not interested.- I sighed and put the phone down, going back to my food.

"I think the only way he's going to stop bothering me about Shi Won is if I tell him about us." I grumbled. 

"I don't want anyone to know." The man who held my heart said quietly. Shocked, I looked at him across the table.

"What?"

"I mean...What if Tae Woong can't accept it?" He looked worried. I sighed. I knew what he was thinking. He didn't want to be the cause of a rift between my brother and I.

"I'm getting pretty damned tired of you thinking this way." I tried to keep any anger out of my voice. He looked at me with wide eyes, afraid I was mad at him. That hadn't been my intention. I didn't want to hurt him any more. 

Joon Hee watched me as I got up from my seat and walked around the table to him. I pulled him out of his chair and kissed him gently. After the kiss, I rested my forehead against his.

"Listen to me, please." I started, holding his hands in mine. "You need to stop thinking that you're not good enough for me or that I'm not supposed to love you. If my brother disowned me--which he won't--for loving you, that is his problem. It is no fault of yours. You keep acting like you're keeping me from something better, but what can be better than being loved the way you love me? I can make my own decisions, Joon Hee. I'm deciding to stay with you because I love you. You're not forcing anything on me. Being with you like this isn't a bad thing for me. Please, STOP!"

We stayed that way for a silent moment and then Joon Hee began to cry. 

And everyone said, awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!