"See. No soup" I shrugged as I lifted the top of my pot and showed it to Jaejoong. He peeked over, and a slight frown settled onto his face.

" You aren't going to kick me out now are you?" He asked slowly. Now that you've mentioned it....

"Well. No. But what are you going to do here any ways" I asked, setting the top back into the pot. I grabbed hold of my cabinets handle and pulled it open. I pulled out my dog foot and attempted to ripped open a new bag of dog food. Without a word, he took the bag and tore it effortlessly. Returning it back into my grasp. I started to pour the contents into Alexander's food bowl. He had been watching Jaejoong the whole time, just as Jaejoong had set foot into the house. And was now sitting directly behind Jaeoong.

"Mm. Can we make more?"

"Make more" I asked, confused. " Make more what?"

"Make more soup" he said, as if it was the most normal thing in the world.

"Your just kidding right? You seriously want to make soup?" I asked. I've never made anything more complicated than a cup noodle. And soup was supposedly level 8 hard. Then again maybe I can Google how and it'll turn out to be delicious.

If I was lucky.

"Your a woman. Woman should know how to cook" He said. And I stared at him. He didn't look like he was joking.

In that case. I must be a man.

"Well. Maybe you should cook it yourself. Your the one who wants to drink it" I tied the opening to my dog and tiptoed my foot as high as possible to slip the bag in. He reached up effortlessly and pushed the bag into the empty slot I eyed.

"Your welcome"He smiled widely.

"I could have done it myself" I murmured under my breathe.

"Well. Probably. In a few years maybe" he shrugged. He turned, his hands inside his jeans as he nudged me with his arms. " Cook it for me"

I frowned. He was so immature. So odd and so changeable And did I mention how he can make a person feel all special and confused with the attention he gives them? Right. despicable.

"Fine..." I finally sighed. "But I don't have enough ingredients"

"Let's go buy it" He grinned, his face lit with excitement.

"Buy it....You mean we go grocery shopping?" I asked slowly. Other then my mom I've never shopped with any one before. Especially with a man.

"I'll pay for the ingredients" he offered quickly. I stepped back slowly, before I remembered to look back up at him.

"What's wrong?" He glanced over.

"Maybe I'll just make more another time. And bring it over to you. Or Whatever. We don't have to go grocery shopping" I explained.

"I want the soup now" he said.

"Well. Maybe what you want isn't everything. I don't want to go" I shot back. He frowned.

"What's wrong?" he asked softly. I bit my lips. It was hard to be stubborn when the other person was being so tender. I would much rather he sound selfish and obnoxious. So I can stand my ground much easily.

"Nothing's wrong. I just don't want to go" I insisted. His eyes widened slowly before a irritated expression crossed his face.

"I didn't ask you to repeat your answer. I want to know why you don't want to go" he bellowed firmly.

"I don't have a reason. I just don't want too" I frowned. He stared at me then his expression frozen before it softened. He sighed finally.

"Kendall shii....Did I do something wrong?" He asked

I stared down at the tile that separated our foot. The space that we had between us. I've learned to built barriers ever since I was a young child. I worked hard trying very hard not to ever let any one in. Letting people in came with too much of a high price. You, yourself start as a whole person. And the moment you let someone in. The moment they leave and they take a little part off you with them. I hated how comfortable I felt with this stranger. Hate how much I wanted to put down some of my barriers for a man I've known for only two days. I've read and heard many tales.

About the easy affinity between a woman and a man.

I don't ever want to trust a man to the point where the moment they decide to leave. I'll have something to lose. Not again.

"We were just talking and laughing so easily before-" He commented.

"That's the problem" I intersected.

"I don't get it. I was happy....Weren't you?" He asked.

"I...I don't know" I teared my gaze from the floor and laid it onto his face.

"What you don't know?!?" he cried infuriated as he swiped across the counter and dropped the plastic plates onto the floor. It clanged noisily as the plate tumbled on its side before falling on its surface. "I like talking to you. I like seeing you.... I like being with you...So. Why don't you know how you feel?"

"Maybe you were too vulnerable " I said. He stared at me.

"Vulnerable....?" He repeated slowly.

"Feeling's don't need to be reciprocated. It's stupid to think otherwise. I'd rather believe that I am somebody who every body can live without..Then ever overestimate what I mean to anyone. You should do the same "

"Oh okay... I get it" a shadow cast onto his face, and the kindness that was just reflected in his eyes disappeared. In it was a emotionless gaze I've never seen before. "Maybe you and I weren't meant to be friend's after all"

"Your right. Maybe if it wasn't for my brother. We wouldn't even cross each others path"

"And we can't even be considered as acquaintances?" he asked. His eyes though emotionless, looked haunted.

I shook my head. "Let's just not be anybody to each other. So this way neither of us have to ever worry about the other party ever going back on their bull"

"Would that make you happy?"

I stared at him.

What kind of question was that? I was doing the right thing. I learned from my mistakes in the past.

"Would, I, being nothing to you. Make you happy?"

I teared my gaze away,

"Why wouldn't I be happy with that arrangement?" I asked.

"I guess people are selfish aren't they" I heard Jaejoong sang. "Some people crave company and willingly beg for affection. Others fear it so much, that they abandon anything that might ever make them happy to avoid it"

"You should know" I smiled at him.

"I do. I am selfish. But I never thought it necessary to lie about my feelings. To you at least...I was happy."

He smiled before he turned to leave. "Let's leave it up to fate then the next time we meet. We'll be fresh strangers"

I watched him made his way out the door, from the very moment he opened it. To the next moment, when he stepped out.

Was I happy? I should have been.

But I wasn't.

My phone started playing in my back pocket, Quickly lifting the white device from my bag. I glanced at the caller's ID. Tiffany.

"Hello?" I answered, I took in a deep breathe.

"Kendall! are you home safe? Taecyeon and I are just on our way to the party tonight-?"

"Tiffany" I started, I closed my eyes. "May I come along?"

"Huh....Oh...of course! Why the sudden change of mind though?" she asked softly.

"It's a Saturday night. And let's say I need to forget something. There would be alcohol at a party no?" I asked.

"Of course there would be. Okay. Let me tell Taecyeon to turn around and come pick you up" She said. I waited as there was silence on the phone. And she came on again. " We're coming get ready"

"Okay"

As I hung up on the phone, I quickly pocketed the phone and settled back onto the couch. As I sat in them leather couch I stared into space. There was a heavy weight on my chest, influencing the ability to breathe calmly. I laid my head gently on my arm as I let the stillness of the house settle around me. I closed my eyes. I wasn't happy. It was a worst feeling then pain. It was a emptiness I was sure have always been there. But for some reason. It was more frightening at that moment.

I don't need my happiness to be on the discernment of another man.

I told myself.

.

.

.

Taecyeon's POV

" What happened?" I asked, I glanced over at Tiffany. She held her phone against her chest as she stared forward a solemn expression in her joyous face.

"I think there's something wrong" Tiffany answered as she turned towards the window, "She said she wants alcohol"

"Are we still going to the party tonight?" I asked, glancing onto my side mirrors for any cars that came in the distance.

"Should we just stay with her for the night?" She asked. I shrugged.

"Up to you" I told her.

"We'll see" She answered, "Is that her sitting on out on the steps of her porch?" She pointed over the white house. And sure enough Kendall sat there, with her Giant dog by her side. She stood when she saw my car ver to a stop beside her street.

"Kendall...Do you want us to stay with you inside your house instead?" Tiffany asked.

"No need" Kendall grinned happily as she opened the back door and slid in.

"Is there something you want to vant ?" Tiffany asked turning toward Kendall from her seat.

"What's there to vant about. I'm not unhappy. I just want to spend sometime with my best friend in this world" She cried happily as she lied onto her back against the back seat.

" Okay then. We'll have loads of fun tonight" Tiffany yelped happily.

We arrived into the large mansion held by Tiffany's close friend Yoona, Who was a heiress that owned her own mansion in her ripe age of 22. As we walked in, Tiffany was quick to wander off to greet the owner of the house. I glanced down at Kendall. Who hadn't spoken a word after we've arrived. Something was off. I opened my mouth as I stared down at her. Before I can say another word she glanced up.

"Do you always accompany Tiffany to parties every week?" she asked .

"If there isn't another another man accompanying her then I guess so" I answered.

"Do you get jealous?" She asked. Her unaccustomed question should have took me by surprise. But oddly, I took comfort in answering it.

"No. I don't" I answered. She stared at me for a long while before rolling her eyes.

"Lies"

"What reason do I have to lie ?" I asked, bemused.

" To protect your masculinity" She pointed out. "She's your lover if you loved her enough. It would matter and it should hurt"

"Lover's too much of a serious term. I care for Tiffany. But She's not the woman who I can love. Just like, how I'm not her only choice"

"Your saying you have other woman?" I heard her ask.

"If there was?"

"Well. I'm not one to judge on someone's faithfulness" She answered. "Why can't you love her?"

I stared across the room, my gaze landing on the girl with the deep auburn hair. How every time she smiles her sincerity shines through. She was precious. She was lovely. Everyone loved Tiffany. Being along side her gave you high status. Made you worthy. Even if deep inside you didn't feel the same way. I appreciated. I cared. Deeply. But my heart never beat romantically for her. Not when she laid her head on my shoulders. Not when we danced. She was like a movie that played all on it's own. I was her audience. 

She was perfect.

But  I wasn't.

"Maybe, She and I are too different" I shrugged as I sighed. I glanced at Kendall. "Know what I mean"

"What do you mean different. It's not a aacceptable answer. You guys are picture perfect. She's beautiful. Your tall and handsome. It's like two pieces of puzzle coming together. Do you know how special that is?"

I lifted my eyebrows, "Tall and handsome? I thank you for that. I've never heard you compliment a man before. I'm in awe" I nodded.

"I'm not complimenting you. I was just saying" She quickly refuted.

"Do you think Tiffany love me?" I asked, It was a two way street.

To love. And be Loved.

Between a destination and a point. 

She grew silent, before she teared her gaze away. "Let's grab a drink" she started, making her way across the room to the banquet table. When she arrived she quickly reached over and grabbed a plate. She pointed over to the sashimi and the sushi displayed onto the crystal platters and she held her plate out. " I never knew parties had such good quality food" She grinned happily as her eyes scanned the table.

"You look like you've never had sushi all your life" I shook my head as I grabbed a champagne for myself,and a glass for her. She took it without hesitation and quickly gulped down a glass without much delay.

"We live in a small town..It's not like I have any reason to go by myself"

I nodded, before taking a slow sip from my glass. I watched as she set her plate onto the table and reached over to downed grab hold of a glass with one hand and another with her other. She downed one glass after another. While I still held onto my first glass. Just as she reached over I grabbed her greedy hand.

"You had 4 glass"

"There's a limited amount of glass you are allowed to drink?" she turned to the bartender, who shook his head and offered her a please have more hand motion. She narrowed her eyes at me before downing more. After her fifth glass I decided to pull her away from the beverages.

"Where are you taking me?" I heard her cried.

"We're going out for some fresh air" I answered before opening the glass door to the back yard. There a backyard as large as a forest accompanied with lights decorated the leafy environment. I felt her swaying beside me, before taking a tumbled forward. Reaching out I quickly held her into place. She was drunk already. I sighed before helping her over to a white bench. As we settled into the bench, She lounged herself over the arm rest.

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"Yes" She cried as she lifted up a whole bottle of champagne she managed to rob without my noticing. She held it out to me " Open" She commanded.

" No" I frowned, before she glared at me with drunk eyes. She turned away and held the bottle cap into her hands trying her best to lift cork from the opening. When she failed she bit into it. I took it from her then before she can bite half the cork off and leave the other half stuck. Giving it two solid shakes and I pressed my thumb down onto the cork. The cork came off, with some of the champagne foamed out also. Kendall quickly grabbed hold of it and downed the drink. I watched in silent as she the drank the champagne the sparkling liquid sliding down her chin, and cascading down her neck. I glanced away before I was able to see where it slid. I waited in silence for her to finish.

"More" She cried as she raised her empty bottle.

"There's no more" I responded.

"Mm. I think I can answer your question now" She answered swaying slowly from her position.

"My question?" I turned to her.

"Whether Tiffany loves you are not" She bellowed.

I smiled in amusement as I sat back, "Well. What's your answer?"

"She does" She nodded hard. Her answer made me silent.

"Does she" I considered.

She nodded again, "I drunk person is not capable of lying" She giggled softly. "Now tell me....Why is Tiffany someone you can't love?"

I turned away then,

"There was a girl I met before Tiffany... I think about her everyday. I can't love Tiffany if my mind still has someone else. Or else it wouldn't be fair to -" before I can finish, I felt Kendall's head land softly onto my shoulders. I shrugged off my coat, covering her from the night's chill. I glanced down at her. This was probably the longest conversation we had. The first time I've seen her so sad. So confused. So off guard. I sighed softly as I stared into the forest.