Everyday I spent after our conversation was waiting for Creator to tell me of my demolition. I had been expecting something like this, but I simply could not help but feel anxious and nervous for when Creator would actually admit it to me.

            Though, the news probably would not come directly from Creator for a long time. The creation of Luhan took a great deal of time. Though this new robot has Luhan as some sort of guide to follow, it will still take an extremely long time to construct completely.

            But despite the feelings that were circling around on the inside, I tried to continue on normally. All of my chores are done as usual, and each of my short conversations with Creator are never out of place.

            Clink. Clink. Clink. Clink. Clop. Slam.

            And just as I do chores for Creator, I have been tending to Luhan as usual. Creator has assigned me with the task of teaching him how to oil his limbs so that he does not creak so often. Creator has asked me to help Luhan with this once every week, so contrary to Luhan’s belief, Creator still cares for him a great deal.

            Clink. Clink. Clink. Tap. Creak. Click. Clink. Clink. Click.

            I walked into the experimentation room and picked up a bottle of oil, pouring some into another container and mixing it so that it was nice and smooth.

            Clink. Clink. Click. Clop.

            Luhan has avoided me quite a bit since our last conversation. Was it because he was ashamed of his temper? Or was it because he wanted to forget about me sooner so that he wouldn’t have to worry about me when I was destroyed? Whatever the reason, our conversations have been shrunk to a few simple sentences and words.

            “Are you going to oil Luhan? If so, please take the oil elsewhere. I have some work I must attend to.”

            “Yes, Creator.”

            Clink. Clink. Clink. Tap. Click. Clink. Clink. Tap. Click. Clink. Clink.

            I noisily walked to Luhan’s door, hesitant on knocking. I wonder if he is even aware that I am to come and help him today.

            Knock. Knock.

            The door immediately swung open and Luhan stood there, eyes a unique, red-violet color. What was that color supposed to mean?

            “I am here to help you oil your limbs. Creator has requested that I do so once every week.”

            He gave a quick nod and gestured for me to come in, closing the door. Luhan sat down on his bed, watching as I stiffly walked over towards him.

            “I will only be teaching you the basics and you will proceed to oil yourself. Afterwards, please carry the container back to Creator’s experiment room.”

            Luhan nodded, not quite looking at me.

            The whole while was silent… awkward. He didn’t speak and only gave a few glances to me as I showed him how to oil his left elbow, wrist and fingers. Despite wanting to get a real conversation out of him, I knew it was quite impossible at the moment.

            Standing up straight, I handed the small container over to him. “Do you understand how to use this?”

            “Yes.” Luhan’s violet eyes flickered to me before turning away as he proceeded to work on his other arm.

            I gave a creaky nod and turned, walking out the door.

            Clink. Clink. Clink. Clink.

            Was this the result of Creator’s decision? Luhan ignoring me? Whatever friendship we had (if we had much of one) was gone. All the uncomfortable feelings of talking to returned. Now, he seemed like a young master that I served, barely given permission to speak to him. Luhan seemed very distant now. He was no longer the curious, and cheerful robot that he had been just a little while ago.

            “Ah, dear, would you come in to help me for a minute?’

            Creak. Nod. Clink. Clink. Clink.

            “Now, I only need you to help me hold this piece right here while I screw in this other part.”

            Walking into the experiment room, I saw exactly what Creator was working on. It was the basic outline or structure of his new robot. It looked nearly identical to Luhan’s original, basic structure at the beginning, except that this one seemed to take on more of a feminine body shape. It was nowhere near done, which gave me time to continue as I was. But Creator had started on it, which determined that I would indeed be thrown away like an old toy eventually.

            “Hold onto this piece right here while I go get something.” He gestured to a small piece right by the head of the robot.

             Clink. Clink. Tap.

            Creator had a smile on his face as he continued to work. He would most definitely be satisfied with this new robot. With the same functions as Luhan, it will be another welcome addition to his small collection. And he can destroy me and pretend I had never existed…this new robot would take the place of me.

            I have no great deal of bitter feelings… though I cannot say I have none at all. Though, I hope Creator will be able to destroy me without regret.

            When will he actually tell me of his plans? Does he really have no intention on telling me, even after I’ve seen his new project?

            “Please lift your finger off and hold down this other piece.”

            Clink. Clink. Tap.

            “As you can see, I will be creating this new robot. I expect you in here every day at 8 o’clock in the morning to prepare and help me for the duration of the construction.”

            Creak. Nod.

            I waited for him to say more. I waited for the words ‘demolition’ or ‘destroy’ or ‘take apart’ to come up.

            But he only continued to work, only telling me every so often where and what to help him with.

            Creak. Clink. Tap. Tap. Clink. Clop. Shing. Clop.

            “Now, move that piece over to the left a bit.”

            Click. Shing. Clop.

            There was no mention of my demolition.

. . .

            Everyday, I helped Creator with his new robot.

            And everyday, I waited for him to at least mention taking me apart and throwing me out.

            Yet, he never mentioned it.

            Did he mean for me to seize to exist without even giving me a warning?

            I never really knew the answers to any questions I asked inside.

            Everything seemed to lull back into the process that had existed while creating Luhan. The only difference though was Luhan. He was now in our lives as a moving, thinking piece of machinery.

            But I was often left ignored. I would prepare the oil for Luhan once a week, clean his room and wash his clothes. He rarely spoke a word to me.

            Luhan’s eyes were now, unlike his ever present blue, a pearlescent red-violet. Almost a magenta. The only times it would switch would be when he was studying (in which case they turned gray) or during random times when I saw him spacing out (and they are black).

            Clink. Clink. Clink. Knock. Knock.

            I listened for a reply on the other side of the door, or for the door to swing open as it often did. But there was nobody.

            Clink. Clink. Clink. Drag. Clop.

            I flipped the switch on the vacuum and drowned out all other sounds with the loud whirring.

           Whirrrrr.

            Glancing around, the room seemed so human. Luhan was able to purchase quite a few things to make it seem less empty and boring, though I could tell he never used several of the things.

            His bed was covered with a deep blue blanket, two white pillows propped up at the head of the bed. There were two beanbags sitting in front of a small television that happily stood in a corner of his room. A dark brown, polished desk and chair stood at the left side of his room, the chair positioned to face the desk.

            Luhan had no need for a blanket and pillows. The beanbags were useless for him, they provided no relaxation to his machine of a body. Luhan always studied in Creator’s study, therefore, he had no need for a desk.

            Whirrr— Tug. Clop.

            The sudden stop of the vacuum surprised me, as well as the sound of the plug popping out of the outlet behind me.

            Creak. Shift. Turn. Clink.

            Luhan stood behind me, his eyes fading from black to a bright blue then to the same red-violet I’ve seen for a while.

            “I must finish vacuuming. I only just started.”

            Luhan shook his head. “I’ll finish.”

            “But you must have something else to do.”

            “I will put away the vacuum later.”

            He shoved the plug back into the outlet and walked over, taking the vacuum from my hands and continuing to vacuum his room. I stood there stiffly, not knowing what to do.

            Luhan flipped the switch off for a moment before saying, “You should go and do as you please for an hour. A bit of time to yourself can’t do anyone harm.” And thus continued to vacuum.

            I stiffly walked out, confused as to why he suggested (or more like forced) that he continue my chores.

            If I could talk to him for a bit longer, it would be so much easier to understand what his thoughts were… what did that red-violet mean? Why has he been ignoring me, yet treating me well now, despite still barely speaking to me?

            Longer conversations could answer so many of my questions. Why would Creator not tell me of my future destruction? Why is he trying to keep it a secret from me for so long? Why is Luhan ignoring me? Why are his eyes such a strange color? What is Luhan hiding?

            So many unanswered questions, so many confusing gestures. Am I to suffer this till I am destroyed? 

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Thanks so much for reading!

~DespisedSecret