A/N: Wow, my finals finally ended and celebrating with a new chapter!!


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Taeil ran as fast as he could, away from his feelings, away from Jihoon. 

What have I done?

He was out of breath, feeling faint, but his legs kept on running without stopping.

What have I done?

He choked on his tears, coughing roughly, not getting enough air and his body finally gave up, halting, and Taeil sank down on the ground. He struggled to breathe as his legs pounded furiously, not so used to running anymore. Voices in his head were screaming and he covered his ears, only to hear them louder. Feeling nauseous, he fumbled to stand up once again and ran to the nearest bush, throwing up the breakfast he had eaten so delightfully just two hours ago.

He was shaking violently as he stood up once more, walking forward slowly. His home was far away from Jihoon's and he knew it would take a long time getting there, but he hadn't brought his wallet with him so it was no other option than to walk.

After walking for another five minutes his legs couldn't bear him any longer and he collapsed against a tree near a playground. Children were playing cheerfully as their mother's stood beside, chatting with each other. Taeil watched them through half-lidden eyes.
He leaned against the tree, catching as much breath as he could. His phone was buzzing inside his pocket but he didn't have the strength to pick it up, he already knew who it was anyway.

Within two minutes he had dozed of.

' Yes, Jihoon? '

"Hyung, he's gone. He ran away, hyung. I can't find him!"

' What? Wait, what did you say? '

Jihoon was running around his neighbourhood, looking for Taeil, "He ran away and I can't find him!"

' Wasn't he there when you got back? '

"He was! But we, he-"

' Ok, calm down Jihoon, I'll come. '

Jihoon hunched down, wiping his eyes, "I'm afraid, hyung. It's my fault."

' No, Jihoon. Calm down he's proba- '

"He broke up with me,"

Yukwon went quiet for a second, ' We're on our way, ok? I'll call the others and we'll help you find him. '

Jihoon didn't bother answering and ended the call. He sat down on the ground, wondering where Taeil would've gone.

Jaehyo was sorting out his new clothes when his phone rang. With a number unknowed, he frowned as he answered;

"Hello?"

' Um, hi. My name Minhyuk. I'm a friend of Jihoon and Taeil. '

"Um, yeah. What do you want?"

Minhyuk cleared his throat, ' Well, it seems that Jihoon and Taeil had a fight and Taeil run away, so we kinda need your help to find him. '

"Wait, what? Why?"

' I don't know the details, but he left Jihoon's house about one hour ago and we still haven't heard from him. So could you please call him, search for him or whatever? '

Jaehyo was already halfway out of the door, "Of course! Where's Jihoon's house?"

Minhyuk told him the address and Jaehyo thanked him, saying goodbye as he hauled in the first taxi, taking him to the right location. 

' Hyung, he disappeared! I've ed up so bad! He left me?! Hyung, he- '

"Jihoon, calm the down!" Jiho tried, "Where are you? Are you home?"

He heard Jihoon's raspy breath from the other line,

' No, I'm out looking for him. We were both here, then I got out for a while, but returned back home. Then we fought and he left, '

Jiho massaged his head, "No trace of him?"

' No, I've called him multiple times, but he doesn't answer. '

"Why did you fight? You know he's a little diff-"

' I know! Why does everyone think I can't understand him?! I DO understand him, hyung! But now he just decided to break up with me, '

Jiho sighed, there must've been something boiling it up, "I'm sure he didn't mean the things he said to you. Calm down-"

' How can I calm down?! He was dead serious! I've already called Yukwon and he and Minhyuk are already heading to my area. I told them to call Taeil's workmate as well, '

"What's happening?" Kyung entered Jiho's room and frowned at the loud voice coming from the other line. Jiho hushed him, 

"Me and Kyung will go out and search too, ok? Or do you want one of us to come to you? I think you need someon-"

' No, just find him. I'll be heading home, but don't bring him there. '

"Um, ok. But-"

--beep--beep--beep--beep--

"er hung up on me," Jiho muttered, before he drew his hands through his thick hair, groaning loudly, "No ing rest at all,"

"Care to explain?" Kyung asked confused.

"Taeil disappeared."

Kyung raised an eyebrow, "Disappeared?"

"They had a fight, Taeil broke up with him, and left," Jiho explained. 

"They broke up?!"

"I don't know any details, but there must be some kind of mistake or misunderstanding here..."

Kyung scratched his head, "I thought they finally.. you know?"

"That's why I said it has to be some kind of misunderstanding. Anyway, we have to go out and look for him,"

Kyung nodded, "Let's go,"

Where the are you Taeil? Jaehyo swore under his breath, as he kept on running around Jihoon's neighbourhood. 20 minutes had passed since Minhyuk's phonecall, and Jaehyo started to wonder if Taeil had been abducted by some erted old man. He grabbed his phone for the nth time and re-dialed Minhyuk's number,

' Hello? ' Minhyuk sounded just as out of breath as he was.

"Hey, did you find him yet?"

' No. Jiho and Kyung are driving around the streets between here and Taeil's place, Yukwon went to Jihoon at his house, and I'm on the way back to his house now as well. Jihoon's a mess, '

Jaehyo sighed, "Ok, well I'm still checking around the area," right then something caught his eye by the playground, "Wait..." he sprinted towards the figure. 

It was Taeil. 

"I found him! I'll call you soon," he put back his phone inside his pocket.

"Taeil?"

He stared at the boy, head and heart spinning, wondering if he even was alive. But as he saw him breathing, he let out a sigh of relief. He kneeled down, watching the smaller's closed eyes. ...

"Taeil?" he tried again.

His body was curled into a ball, he looked so fragile as he looked up at Jaehyo. Eyes red and swollen, and Jaehyo felt pain striking his heart. 

"Go away," Taeil said, voice harsh.

"Don't even try," Jaehyo reached forward to the others bangs from his forhead, "You're soaked in sweat, how are you feeling?"

Taeil avoided the other's eyes as he tried to sit up straight.

Jaehyo grabbed his shoulder to hold him steady, "Taeil-ah?"

"I'm not weak," Taeil whispered, more to himself than to Jaehyo, "I'm alright,"

"You actually think you can convince me with lies right now? You're clearly not alright at all," 

"Jaehyo, please, just leave me alone," 

"No, let's go home." he grabbed Taeil's waist and hoisted him up.

Taeil struggled with weak arms, "No, please,"

He managed to push the other away and sank down on the ground once again, hiding his face. Fresh tears escaping his salty eyes and he let out a pained squeal. He clutched his fist against his chest, "It-it hurts so much."

That strong face Taeil had worked so hard on creating was splitting into pieces and he felt humiliated by letting Jaehyo witness it. He hated showing his emotions and now he was exposing them all to the person who didn't have any problems with life, someone who, in his mind, didn't understand.

"I know it does," Jaehyo whispered and pulled the other into a hug.

"No, you don't," He was breaking apart and he knew, even though he didn't want to admit it, that he needed support. He had just thrown away a very precious and important part of his life. Even though it had only been over a small amount of time, he had hurt someone he loved. 

"It's for Jihoon's own sake," Taeil sobbed, "I can't drag him down. I can't take his happiness away,"

Jaehyo held the smaller closer, "Come on, let's go to my place," 

Taeil was shaking in his embrace, 

"Try to calm down. Let's try to stand up again, ok?"

It took another good five minutes before Taeil was able to stand up straight, yet another ten to get into a taxi, where he fell asleep almost immediatly.

Minhyuk's loud ringtone rang through in the silent room, and Minhyuk nearly threw himself on it, "Yah! How long where you supposed to let us wait?!" he growled.

' Do you usually speak like this to people you don't know? ' Jaehyo muttered through the phone.

Minhyuk groaned, "Are you with him now? How is he?"

' We're at my place, he's sleeping right now. He's drained. '

Minhyuk let out a sigh of relief, "He's asleep at Jaehyo's place," he said to Yukwon who met his eyes from beside Jihoon's side. Jihoon had been looking down at the floor, not speaking, barely breathing ever since they arrived, but the news finally made him look up.

Minhyuk sighed, "How is he feeling? What do you mean drained?"

' He's obviously not good. He was half unconcious when I found him, cold as ice and sweaty as , like he'd been running for miles, '

Minhyuk met Jihoon's eyes, pain and concern written all over,

' He was shaking badly and couldn't even stand up, babbling about how everything was for Jihoon's sake. I don't know if I should take him to the hospital or... He looks, you know, pretty bad, '

"Can I talk to him?" Yukwon asked, noticing his boyfriend's shocked expression. It was too much for Minhyuk to handle and Yukwon knew it. Agonizing feelings like depression and empty sadness had always scared Minhyuk, so he walked over to him, taking the phone from his hand and smiled, 

"Hello Jaehyo, this is Yukwon, Can you please repeat everything to me?" he said and walked away from the room.

Silence. This was not Minhyuk's thing - comforting others. He was pretty good at comforting Yukwon, mainly because that only had to be done once or twice every year, but he felt so awkward comforting anyone else.

Jihoon was back staring at the floor and Minhyuk was afraid if he told him how bad Taeil's state was, he would have to handle a panic attack from Jihoon as well. He took a breath, charging some courage and walked over to the younger, "Jihoon-ah, Taeil's pretty bad but he should be ok soon enough. He just needs to rest I think,"

"Did he have an attack?" Jihoon asked, looking at his hyung, hoping for answers, "You said he was asleep now? Did he give him anything to drink or eat before he fell asleep?"

"I don't know, Jihoon. I didn't ask for much details since I don't know much about.. those kind of things. But Jaehyo said he was shaking, sweating, mumbling about things and he had been half unconcious when he found him," he answered carefully but truthfully. He saw no meaning in lying.

Jihoon nodded and started to chew on his lower lip - the habit he had when he was about to cry. And in a matter of seconds he broke, tears rolling down his cheeks. 

Minhyuk panicked, "O-oh.. um Jihoon, it-it's going the be ok! Don't worry!"

"But it's my fault, hyung! I shouldn't have pushed him, I always pushed him too far," Jihoon said, "Why did I tell him I thought he was complicated? That's like the worst thing to say to him!"

"No it's not, Jihoon-ah. He's probably just insecure like I was. You know I was-"

"You and him are nothing alike," Jihoon glared at him, " So don't start comparing."

Minhyuk glared back, "I'm just trying to comfort you,"

"I don't need your comfort! I deserve to feel like ," 

"Jihoon, calm down," Yukwon entered the room once again, and Minhyuk thanked the Gods.

He went to kneel down in front of the crying boy, "I talked with Jaehyo now, and like we heard before, Taeil is asleep in his bed."

"Is he-"

"Let me finish," Yukwon hushed him, "When Jaehyo found him he was already half unconcious and it seemed like he had been running from your house as fast as he could before collapsing. He was crying and repeating the same sentences, trying to breath at the same time, so along with his emotions, the exhaustion most likely built up stress and panic. He couldn't walk by himself, but I think that was from the lack of energy. Taeil hadn't said much but Jaehyo told me he had been repeating things like 'It's all for Jihoon's good', and 'I don't want to drag him down'."

He paused and put Jihoon's hand in his own, "In his mind, he's doing this to protect you. I don't think it's right, and I know it's hard for you to understand, but I think relationships drains him a lot. He's not used to get mutal feelings and I guess that is why he doesn't want to cause you any more trouble."

Jihoon sighed and stood up, "I know, I've heard it all before."

Yukwon stood up as well, "Maybe it's best if you take a break from each other?" he said with care.

Jihoon laughed ironically, "No! I will not ing take a break, if I leave him now he will get worse and I know it," 

Now Minhyuk joined Yukwon, "Jihoon, I think you should listen-"

"You, shut up!" Jihoon exclaimed, pointing his finger at the older, "You don't know about things like this!"

"And you do?!"

Yukwon tugged at Minhyuk's sleeve, "Stop."

"No, I won't stop. We're doing our best here, Jihoon. So ing appreciate it!" Minhyuk had had enough, "You don't know about physical diseases or mental health as well, so don't play the know-it-all here! You should be happy that we're listening to your endless ramble of 'Taeil Taeil Taeil' every ing day, helping you to understand him, even becoming his friends, instead of blaiming us for treating him badly all the time!"

"Minhyuk, stop," Yukwon hissed.

Jihoon glared at him, but Minhyuk had no intention of stopping, "I clearly remember every time you've accused us for not understanding Taeil, when you don't even understand him yourself. He's not a ing child, Jihoon, he can take care of himself. Don't make it sound like he's incapable of everything, like he needs some kind of daycare from a nanny. I would find it tiring  if I was treated like a depressed baby all the time too! Shouldn't you treat him like a normal person instead to make him feel better? I would never be able to handle a relationship where my partner treats me like I'm made out of ing glass. I would break up as well."

Minhyuk stormed out of the house, slamming the door behind him and Yukwon gaped in horror, "I'm so sorry, Jihoon. He didn't mean that! He's just angry and tired now and-,"

"Leave, I want to be alone," Jihoon interrupted and turned to walk upstairs.

Yukwon looked after him, "Jihoon?"

Jihoon closed his bedroom door after him, collapsing on the bed. Tears soaking the pillow that still held the faint smell of Taeil.