{i wonder where we'd end up if we could start again} | eli/kevin

the ride back to their dorm was silent, kevin staring out the window and refusing to look over at eli. eli tried to make conversation, offering a quiet "we did well today, didn't we?" that was met with only silence. eli sighed, slumping down in his seat more. he glanced over at kevin, the younger boy resolutely ignoring his stare though he could feel it sending warmth through his face and body.

"are you hungry?" eli tried again, but once again got no response. he was tempted to just ignore the boy's antics but he saw the glance in the rearview mirror their manager gave him, knowing that if he didn't fix this then they'd both be in for a lecture about band morale.

eli shifts closer to kevin, resting a hand on kevin's knee and starting to speak. he doesn't get to say anything before kevin shoves his hand off muttering, "don't touch me. not after you—"

kevin cuts himself off, but suddenly eli knows what this was about.

when they had finished their short performance with jamosa, the three of them had congregated backstage and congratulated each other, thanking the staff as well. eli had been particularly proud of his rap in the song, both versions, and was nothing but smiles and hugs as he sweeped through the dressing room to thank everyone. when he got to jamosa, he had sweeped the tiny girl in his arms, lifting her and spinning her around. she giggled sweetly and they exchanged words of praise and grins. when it came time for them to part, jamosa had hugged kevin and whispered something to him, and when she got to eli she simply gave him a kiss on the cheek and slipped out of the room.

eli had thought nothing of it at the time, but now he realizes how it must have looked to kevin.

he sighs once again and wraps kevin in a hug against his will, saying, "you're ridiculous. you know i'm not interested in her."

"really?" kevin replies bitterly. "could have fooled me."

kevin struggles against eli's hold but eli doesn't budge, instead nuzzling into kevin's neck and whining, "keviiiiiiiiiiin."

his affection caused kevin to stop struggling, but a frown was still marring his pretty face and eli felt like a royal for hurting him.

"kevin, c'mon. we've talked about this," he insists. "please don't make it out to be more than it is."

eli sounds almost pitiful as he tries to explain himself and kevin starts to feel bad too. his angry expression drops as he runs a hand through his hair. "i know, i know. i'm just stressed."

kevin sighs despondently and eli pulls him closer, "we all are, kevin. it's okay."

"last time we were in japan… and then we went back… and the dorm…" kevin starts rambling and eli shushes him with a quick peck. kevin finally relaxes completely at that, his body going lax in eli's arms.

"it'll be fine," eli reassures. "it'll be easier than last time, okay? i'll make sure we room together." at that, eli spares a glance back up at their manager but he's purposely ignoring them in the back and eli is thankful that their staff, the managers in particular, care about them enough to not interfere or report them to the company.

"okay," is all kevin says in reply and he closes his eyes, signaling the end of the conversation. eli shifts the two of them into a more comfortable position, running his fingers through kevin's hair as the boy finally reaches a state of relaxation that eli hadn't seen in weeks. he already loathes the idea of having to wake kevin up when they arrive at their dorm, but the ride takes longer and has more turns than he remembers. if eli notices their manager giving them more time to relax, he doesn't say a word.