I wish things had gone differently at that time. There was just a lot of tension and it was unbearable for everyone. We had a hard time working with each other.

Surprisingly, I found myself to be the one making most efforts. Yes, I felt hurt and betrayed, but I had a job and they were my colleagues after all. You know how they say never mix business with pleasure; well, we should’ve agreed to never get involved romantically with one another. It caused too much problems.

After Jinki and I had that conversation, it was harder for me to talk to him. All was out in the open and I felt pathetic and embarrassed. He clearly knew that I loved him, but that didn’t change a thing.

He would still try to act like we were best friends, but I just couldn’t respond positively to that. I was too hurt at that moment. I felt bad though because things didn’t seem to go well with Minho. They didn’t talk as much and I could tell that Jinki was suffering as much as I was. There were times where I wanted to comfort him, but I…couldn’t.

I also noticed that Minho and Jonghyun seemed to get along now. I would catch them laughing together and pulling pranks on each other. I was glad they had settled their differences, unlike Kibum who didn’t seem to approve of it at all.

It had always been clear to me that he loved Jonghyun. He actually told me about it once and even cried because he had kept those feelings to him for so long. So when I’d see him mope around the house or give Minho deadly glares, it didn’t surprise me. I understood why he was so angry; after all, he wasn’t the only one whose friendship had been ruined by Minho.

I wanted to tell him that he had no reason to worry, but the truth was that I didn’t think Jonghyun would ever love him in that way.

With everything going on, I just reached a point where I was fed up with all of them. I couldn’t wait for the moment everyone would come back to their senses. Otherwise, I feared for what could happen in the future.

Until that moment, I just wanted to forget about everything that had happened in those weeks and try to focus on my work. I wanted to go back to being the optimistic person I was before.

As for my relationship with Jinki, I didn’t want to think about it anymore. I did put him aside, but I couldn’t help hoping that we would be friends again… because even if I tried to deny it, I knew that no one could ever replace him. 

_______________________________________________________________________________

Sorry for the wait... With SHINee's comeback and all, I got a little distracted. XD Hope you liked this.