Frustration
I'd Sing For You
"Jongin, look, if you're in too much pain, you need to stop."
" no. It doesn't even hurt that badly, I can bear it." Jongin shot back.
He had been practicing for a few hours now and the pain in his back was only getting worse. Being the type of person he was, Jongin was not about to just stop. His entire life had been centred around giving his all, pushing himself to the limit, striving for the impossible: Perfection.
It wouldn't be a lie to say he was almost there, either. Jongin's fans knew it and so did the rest of the country. There was something unique about the way in which he moved across the dance floor. Smooth, connected, ballet-like motions, or quick, precise, and robotic movements. All of which Jongin seemed to do effortlessly. It's not just about the steps, either. If you saw him preform his presence was enough to give you the best kind of chills. Jongin was just overflowing with sultry gazes, heated stares, and something much more powerful. Dance was the world to Jongin, quite literally in fact. The dance studio was more of a home then his house ever was. It was also where he followed a passion for years. This very passion was what radiated from every step, every turn, and every body roll he executed. Jongin also had this innate ability to rub off some of his passion to his viewers. You could see his body and mind melt away into the music and it was really one of the most breathtaking sights.
The young dancer learned about his back problems a few months ago and he was determined to not let them get in the way of what he loved. Jongin's trainer was less enthusiastic about having him work, but knew better than to argue. No matter what, it seemed nothing could stop him from dancing. Not even the sharp pain that came with every stretch of his back. When the pain hit him hard, he danced even harder in an effort to rebel against the irritation. His teacher made him run through a new routine and watched him closely.
"Jongin, take a break now." the teacher's voice was stern and he simply nodded, pretending to take a seat while the coach stepped out of the room.
Jongin ran a hand through his hair, letting out a sigh of frustration as he looked at himself in the mirror.
Silently he began the routine again on his own, stepping to the side with his right foot, he brought his left hand up and followed through into a turn. He bit down on his lip as pain raced up his spine and he noted his reflection in the mirror as he continued to move across the floor. Jongin's movements were a bit off, not by a lot, but the thing that bothered him most was the fact he would clearly wince when he ached enough. It annoyed him and truthfully was a bit disgusted by himself for being so weak. Jongin's jaw tightened as he pounded the glass of the mirror, cursing loudly. Footsteps coming towards him told that his coach was listening the entire time.
"We're going to the doctor's today, Jongin-ssi."
"I don't need to go. I'm fine." Jongin retorted.
"I've already made an appointment. We leave in 20 minutes." the older man replied calmly before exiting the room.
Jongin watched his reflection in the mirror to make sure he was gone. Carefully pressing his back against the cool glass he began to feel dizzy. It felt like someone was pounding on his head and relentlessly squeezing his heart.
Now, Jongin wasn't typically afraid of doctors, but the fact that his back problems had not been improving was enough for him to not look forward to a visit. Maybe, just maybe, if he avoided it, he wouldn't be given a diagnosis that would hinder his dancing.
Fourty-three minutes later, Jongin and his teacher were walking through a parking garage to the specialist's office. They made small talk on the car ride up there, but now it was just silence.
The doctor, Dr.Choi, immediately saw them when they arrived and Jongin was unsure if that was a good or bad thing at first. In the end he decided it was good since he just wanted to get it over with and get the hell out of there.
Dr. Choi asked some general questions, looked over his primary care physician's records and proceeded to do some small tests; checking reflexes, sensitivity of his nerves near his lower back, seeing how he walked on his tip-toes and heels. Every time the doctor scribbled something down Jongin would get nervous.
"I'd like to get an MRI to get a better idea of what might be going on." Dr. Choi explained further and Jongin forced himself to listen.
Thankfully, nothing seemed to indicate a huge problem yet, but he did tell the young man to take it easy during practices or else he could worsen the injury. Along with that advice, he prescribed some pain medication and made sure they set up an appointment for an MRI as soon as possible.
Jongin's teacher silently hoped the doctor's words would finally get to the stubborn teenager.
And they did, a little bit. Jongin slowly began to realise that he could very well hurt his chances of dancing in the future if he didn't choose to rest and get better. He decided for now he'd cut down his practice time and rest a little more, just to be safe.
A/N: Sorry for the late update! i'm actually in FL for my grandmother's funeral so I've been a bit busy. :) Anyways, I had planned for this chapter to be longer, but it would take a lot more time for that so since there was nothing updated yet, I figured it'd be better to post a short chapter. ^-^ I hope you enjoyed it~ Thank you for subscribing! <3
Ah~ there's one day of school left! I will be able to update as soon as i finish my last final~ thank you!
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