Hi Ji,” said Seunghyun as he walked into the studio. Surprised to find him alone, he proceeded to ask, “Where are the others?” Jiyong looked up from his phone and said, “Hey TOP-hyung. They ran down to get food,” he said with a bit of annoyance. The other hummed in acknowledgement and slumped down on the couch next to the leader. “What’s up with you?” Jiyong was always really good at picking out moods, especially when it came to Seunghyun. He sighed and responded, “I don't want to talk about it right now because the other guys might come in.”

"That serious?”

"What time does our schedule end?” He completely disregarded the previous question.

"Around 8pm. Not much today but the week will bring long hours. Why?”

"Do you have time to talk afterward? Once the guys are gone,” he added as an afterthought. He didn’t want to risk being overheard even though he still wasn’t sure he would gather the courage to approach the young leader about the events of last night. He didn’t even know how to start talking about, well, everything that had been going on between him and Dongwook since that one kiss in the dressing room.

“Of course I do. Do you want to talk here or go somewhere else?”

“I would feel more comfortable at my house.” The leader nodded in agreement and turned his attention back to his phone where he was rapidly typing out a warning message to the other members. It wasn’t long before the other three filed in and the day got started.

It was around 9:15pm when the other members had finally left the studio and allowed Jiyong to begin collecting his things. Being the leader, he was always the last to leave. “Ready to go?” he asked Seunghyun after a few minutes. The older nodded and they walked silently out of the studio and onto the elevator to head to the garage.

“Did you come in your car, Ji?”

The leader shook his head, “I didn’t want to drive over here today so I just took a company car. How did you get here?”

The older couldn’t help the small sigh that escaped his lips as he said, “Dongwook-hyung drove me.”

Jiyong shot him a questioning look which the older pointedly ignored. He was not about to get into it right now, if he even managed to speak about his problems to begin with. Too much time had passed since he impulsively decided Jiyong was his only hope and, by now, he had thought about it way too much. Anytime he thought about something too much the likelihood of him taking action went down significantly.

Unfortunately, the entire car ride back to Seunghyun’s villa was silent, only giving him more time to think. I should be able to figure this out on my own. But, really, what is there to figure out? Nothing can happen between us. Do I even want anything to happen? He seems like he wants something more than friendship with me but I’m sure he’s just confused. He has to be confused. Why am I even thinking about all this? He shouldn’t be giving it thought either. He just needs perspective. If he doesn’t spend time with me he won’t be tempted to think about kissing me and eventually he’ll get over it. We just need time apart to move past this. That’s it. That’s all we need. We just can’t be close to each other, at least not for a while.

Seunghyun was so deep into his racing thoughts he hadn’t even realized he was slouched forward, forehead resting against the palm of his hand as tears silently slid down his cheeks. It was with a gentle hand resting on his back that he let out a small gasp in surprise and he jerked his head around to find Jiyong looking directly at him, extreme worry taking over every one of his features. “Hyung, we’re- we’re here. Come on, let’s go inside.” He wrapped his hand around the older’s wrist and tugged so he could follow him out of the car and didn’t let go until they were inside, removing their shoes to place on the shoe-rack there.

“I’ll be right back,” Seunghyun mumbled as he walked toward the kitchen. Jiyong let out a small sigh as he let his tired body fall onto Seunghyun’s plush couch, knowing exactly what Seunghyun was going to the kitchen for. And, sure enough, in a couple minutes’ time he returned with two glasses of red wine. Seunghyun took a seat on the opposite end of the couch, facing forward with a blank stare, after setting Jiyong’s glass on the coffee table in front of him. He slowly gulped down the wine, the glass never parting from his lips, as Jiyong took a small sip of his own and carefully observed him. Finally, when Seunghyun was about halfway through his glass, the younger cleared his throat.

“Hyung? You’re really worrying me.”

Seunghyun only managed a small sigh finally setting his glass down.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you like this.”

“Well that’s because I’ve never had a problem like this one,” the older said before he could stop himself. He brought his hand up to his lips and rubbed them with his fingers. What now?

“You know you can talk to me about anything, right?”

Seunghyun sighed once again. “Probably not anything, Ji.”

Jiyong shifted on the couch to face Seunghyun, who was still looking forward, and let out a heavy breath. “Yes, anything.”

At long last, the older turned his head slightly to meet Jiyong’s concerned gaze. The younger simply raised his eyebrow slightly in question, waiting for the older to speak. I can’t do this, he thought. How can I even bring it up? Seunghyun opened his mouth to speak but no words came out and he simply stared at the younger, mouth hanging open and a confused, yet pained, look on his face.

“Hyung, I can’t make you talk but you need to know I’m really worried. I just want to help you. Nothing you could say would make me turn away from you.” He hoped these words, which he completely meant, would be enough to comfort the older but he was wrong. He was simply given a small laugh that fell from the older’s open mouth.

“You say that now, Ji, because you don’t know. We always think the people we care about can’t do or say anything to push us away until they do the unthinkable.”

Jiyong pursed his lips as he thought of a suitable response. In a sense, Seunghyun was right. If someone did the unthinkable, could you forgive him? But, then, what was unthinkable?

“Well, unless you killed someone or abused of someone I think it’s okay,” he said. “Even then, I wouldn’t turn away from you. I’d try to understand you,” he added as an afterthought. It was true- he would try not to jump to conclusions because if he knew anything about Seunghyun, which he did, he knew he wouldn’t do something terrible for no reason and without remorse. But he doubted his troubles were anything along those lines.

“Ji, it’s not like that. But you couldn’t even imagine what’s been going on and I just don’t even know how to talk about it.”

The younger scooted toward the older to give him the feeling of closeness but was still careful not take away from his personal space. Seunghyun looked at him, eyes watering, before burying his face in his hands and trying to stifle what sounded like a small cry.

“Just say anything. It can be anything at all; it doesn’t even have to be an explanation or a story. Just tell me what you feel.”

“I don’t even know how I feel. That’s part of the problem.”

“Well, whatever you’re feeling it doesn’t look like something good. Or are you conflicted?”

Seunghyun nodded, head still in his hands. He hastily wiped away a few tears before picking up his wine glass and looking straight ahead.

“I feel lost. I feel like- like my heart is filled with sorrow.”

Jiyong nodded though the older was not looking at him. He didn’t want to interrupt.

“O-oh,” he broke the single syllable as another steady stream of tears began to pour from his eyes. “Ji- Ji I can’t talk about this. I can’t even…” He broke off and shook his head, once again wiping his tears away.

Finally, the younger placed a comforting hand on his back and began to move it in a circular motion. “Hyung, you don’t have to talk if you really don’t want to. But, from what I’m seeing, you need to. Even if you find it unpleasant, you have to let it out. It’s not healthy to carry around something so painful. You know you can always count on me but- but if you’d feel more comfortable with someone else…. Maybe Dongwook-hyung? I know you two are close.”

At this, Seunghyun just broke down. Dongwook, was all he could think. The person he would go to first was simply not an option in this particular situation. Seunghyun couldn’t fight off the tears or sobbing that came as soon as Jiyong mentioned his name. He felt the circling hand halt but not leave his back but he couldn’t bring himself to look at the younger. Jiyong let his sobbing fill the otherwise-quiet room for a couple of minutes before he cautiously asked the next question, in a hushed voice.

“Is- is he the problem?”

A/N: Hello!  I just want to say thank you to everyone for sticking by me even though my updates don't come by very often.  I really appreciate your patience especially because I know what it feels like to wait for updates.  I'm very happy you're enjoying the story and I hope you continue to.  And for my new subscribers, welcome and thanks!

PS- I miss Se7en so much already.  ;-;