Dawne’s pov:

We’re almost there. It has been quite a long drive. In the car we have discussed some things that I didn’t know of yet. They told me their names, not that I remembered them. I don’t think I need to know those yet. I’m going to see them for the first time. Why should I act like I already know them while everybody knows I don’t? So I won’t. I do know that I’m going to live with a middle-aged woman and her 18 year old son. Wait.. Or was it 19? No, I’m sure it was 18. After a while I sigh. God, I’m so nervous. I mean.. What if she doesn’t like me? What if he doesn’t like me? I don’t even understand how he agreed with all this. Isn’t it kind of.. strange for an 18 year old guy? Well, not that I understand guys so well. Actually I just don’t. But.. Well, eventually he did actually agree with it, apparently. I look forward when the car slows down. But it isn’t just slowing down, it’s stopping. After just a few seconds someone opens the door for me and I get out of the car, while thinking about if it’s against my will or not. I take the biggest part of my bags – it’s not that I have hundreds or something, but I do have a few – and follow Serena, who gladly understands that I don’t want to be on front. We walk to the door with just two other people behind us. “So Dawne. Are you ready?” she asks with a little smile. I nod, but I don’t smile or look at her. “Eh.. Dawne, are you alright?” “Yeah. Why?” “Because.. you’re still nodding.” Now that she says it… “Oh, right. Hehe..” GOD, that must have sounded stupid! Ah well.. Finally she rings the doorbell. Oh god. Why? Why?!
After just a few seconds a, pretty sweet looking, woman opens the door and starts to smile, but still very subtle. “Well, hello. Eh.. Are you the one who I talked to on the phone?” Serena nods. “Ah, then you must be Serena.” Now they both smile and shake each other’s hands. “Yes I am. And over here, the one who it’s actually all about as you know.” “Oh, of course. Hello dear.” She stretches out her hand. “I’m Doloris.” Oh, right. That was her name. I shake her hand. “I’m Dawne.” She holds her hand on her heart. “You just have a wonderful voice, girl.” Wow, that’s.. weird. Sweet, but weird. “Eh.. Thank you,” I say chuckling, in a little bit awkward way. “Well, eh… Why don’t you guys first come in.” Serena and I both nod. Serena gets the other bag from one of the people who are behind us and Doloris guides me inside. When I look around I see those two stay behind as Serena follows me inside. Doloris takes my bags and puts them down. “Doloris, can we…” She looks at Serena and then back to me. “Oh, of course. We need to discuss the last few things and make sure we know everything we need to know, so.. Just go sit in the living room over here,” she says while pointing. “and, if it’s not too much to ask, try to feel home a bit. Oh, and Jaden is upstairs but he’ll be here in a minute to introduce himself.” Before I can even say anything, Serena and Doloris go to the kitchen, next to the living room. Ah well.. I walk into the living room and go sit on the couch. She’s really nice. And she doesn’t really make uncomfortable or something. It feels good. But wait. In a minute that guy is coming over here and the rest is in the kitchen. Great… Oh, and.. Yeah, there he is.

He comes around the corner and tries to see who’s in the kitchen. Only then he realizes I’m here. He looks at me. First he seems a bit unsure but then he comes sit down on the other side of the couch. “Eh.. Hey, I’m Jaden,” he says with quite a spontaneous smile. “I’m Dawne.” Ok, I have to say something else. “Nice to meet you,” he already says. “Yeah.” Well, that was.. bad. Very bad. So… And now..? God, this is awkward! But again Jaden starts. Thank god. “So… It’s probably quite.. strange for you to suddenly come live with us.” I smile, but I think it’s barely visible. “Yes, it is. But.. it must also be kind of strange for you two.” He chuckles. “Well.. Yeah, you’re right about that. So I guess we’re even on that one.” I look at him, with a smile, and an actually visible one this time. “You know..” I start. “Actually I was wondering.. The first time they mentioned your mother, about a couple of months ago, you weren’t living with her yet, were you?” He shakes his head. “Why not?” He looks forward. I see he’s thinking. “Well, let’s say.. My parents got divorced, I came to live with my dad – I know, that’s weird – and after a while my mom felt so lonely that she applied herself as a foster parent.” He chuckles. “And I didn’t know about it until just a few weeks ago.” “Well, but.. I’m not sure if it’s that strange. I mean.. That she didn’t tell you.” “No, actually it isn’t. But still I was quite shocked when I heard about it.” “Yeah.. But why did she actually apply herself as a foster parent at all? She had you, right? So.. Why would she..” “Yeah, well… We actually thought I was going to stay there, with my father. I barely ever came by after a few months or something and she.. just wanted someone to take care of.” He looks at me. “Like you.” It stays quiet for a while. I’m still just thinking about it. How bad must she have felt to actually do that?
“Actually I would like to ask you something now,” Jaden says. “I just came to think of it.. What is it actually that you have?” I’m not sure if I understand what he’s talking about. “I mean.. My mom said you were ill. For a very long time. So I just wanted to know wha…” All the joy that I felt just yet, no matter how little it was, feels like it’s being out of my body. “What’s wrong?” I close my eyes for a moment and shake my head. “Really, what is it?” he asks caring. “Nothing, it’s just…” I sigh. “I understand. I understand why you’re asking that, but I really.. really just don’t want to talk about it. And by the way, how come you don’t know about it yet?” “Eh, well… I do remember that I asked my mom about it, but she never really answered me, so… Yeah.” He looks like he thinks I now think he’s a bit dumb. “But, seriously. I don’t particularly need all the details, but why can’t you at least.. say what it’s called or something?” “I’m very sorry to say, but… As I see you don’t know about it, I think it’s better if I don’t tell you either.” “But.. Why?” I look at him. “Because I want to start over. With everything. From today on I’m living here, so I also just want to forget everything else, actually.” He sighs. “Is there any possibility that I’ll find out?” “Maybe.. But I hope not.” I see Serena and Doloris stand up. After a few seconds I do so too. “It looks like Serena is leaving. I’m going to say goodbye to her.” Without waiting for his reaction or even looking at him, I follow Serena and Doloris who are already almost at the door.

Even when I say goodbye to Serena, it’s like I’m not really present. It still bothers me. I’ve always wanted people to understand me, to understand what I’ve gone through, cause just a few people did understand. But now, now I somehow just refuse to talk about it. But.. I’m still going to stick with what I said. I want to start over. I want to start over and forget all the bad things of my past. I sigh. I just hope I’m able to do that.

I'm sorry guys! I know there isn't happening so much yet but PLEASE just keep on reading, cause it is coming. Oh yeah, things are gonna happen. Woooooh~ No seriously, it's coming, but be patient..
And by the way: thanks for even reading it until this far, never thought you would but here you are, apparently!:D
Please comment! At least, if you think there's actually something to say about this already. Ah well...

xxxx