STORY LINK

Reviewer: hyunvirus

Title: 3/5

Honestly, I've seen a lot of titles like these. There are a number of fanfictions with titles like yours. What I like though, that it related to your story really well. It was more of a symbol rather than a title, in my opinion. It's grammatically correct, and it didn't reveal the whole plot, so good job. I suggest you use a title that's in English.

Appearance: 4/5

Even without a poster, your appearance is really neat and clean. You only used Arial and Bold, which was good. I don't have any complaints about the appearance other than it needs at least a little bit of color. I suggest using another color in portraying Yoona or Luhan's POV. 

Foreword/Description: 5/5

I'm normally strict with this section, but your description and foreword blew me away. Your description was what a description should really be. It left me curious, and I pondered awhile before clicking next. It summarized the story pretty well, and I have no complaint there. As for the foreword, the snippet you chose was eye catching. It was well thought out and I applaud you for that. 

Characterization: 8/10

Even if it's just three chapters, I felt the characters. Yoona's character was a bit too pitiful, but not that overboard. However, this kind of character is a bit overused. Yoona's character is somewhat negative because of her adoptive parents that never loved her, right? I prepared myself to read instances that give meaning on why they never loved her. Yoona's character needs a little more depth. You can at least give a little more focus on why she's like that, because it affects the reasons she wants to escape her birthplace. As for Luhan's character, his is a bit more realistic. I understand how he wanted to find his real parents, despite having caring adoptive ones. His character doesn't have much depth, but I'm telling he's shallow. Describe his position more, and describe how much he wants to see his adoptive parents. 

Originality: 4/5

I haven't seen a fanfiction like this, honestly. You're not afraid to kill your characters, which is good. It shows you're not biased and that you have uniqueness. It's unique and beautiful in its own ways.

Plot: 13/15

The main idea was that Luhan and Yoona will fall in love in three hours and that they'll die in the end. Even if it was short, the plot was clear and creative. It didn't have plot holes, and the events that took place was not out of place. The plot is not amazing, but written creatively. 

Spelling/Grammar/Punctuation: 25/25

Full marks! No grammar, spelling or punctuation error at all!
 

Flow: 7/10

Your flow was a bit rushing. I wished I read some more Luhan and Yoona moments. However, the rest of the flow was okay. It wasn't disrupted my author's notes, so that's good. 

Enjoyment: 10/15

I'm not into angst and sad stories, but yours was written beautifully that I couldn't lower another point. I bet there are a lot of angst readers that will love your fanfiction. 

Bonus: 5/5

Becasue you deserve it. 

Total: 84/100

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