[A/N: I know most of you are excited to read, but I just need a few minutes of your time to read my note =)]

It's been a while since I last updated and 2013 was really a roller coaster for me--the best ride ever. I loved it, who didn't? It's just that on the latter part of the year, I was involved in a car accident together with my family. It really took time before I was able to recover (though I'm still recovering...) and I know I left most of you hanging. I deeply apologize for that. But then before, I was already able to write some one shots, and I promise to post them one by one, because I'd really love to hear from you. I promised to post rare pairings like Seo with Xiumin, Tao, Baekhyun and Chen, but because of the holiday's season that gone by, I liked the idea of posting this one first before anything else. (And cheers to Ace Babies for that Crazy in Love perf. Luhan matched perfectly with Seo!)

After that, I'm apologizing in advance if I will be inactive for a while here because I'd want to focus on my other running fics like The Heartbreakers and Unwanted II. Moreover, I still need time to recover from the injuries that I acquired during the accident, though I'm a lot better now, to be quite honest. Because of that incident in my life, I learned to appreciate life more, not just my own, but the also the other people around me. I focused more on my family and friends from then on, so I wasn't really updated here. I didn't even get the chance to log in so I'm sorry for pending requests and unreplied messages.

And here's to a new life for me, here's to 2014! Hope you guys forgive me for being away for far too long... (that sounds like a song... kkk) So here's Mircales in December, sounds familiar too, right?

Much love from your author,

MShey17. xx 

The city lights twinkled as the moon shone brightly above Seoul. Seohyun’s arms were crossed against his chest as she stared blankly through the glass windows of her office. The view of the city from where she stood was spectacular. It could really brighten up one’s mood, but not Seohyun’s. She remained stared at the lights coming from different establishments in Seoul but her mind was occupied by other things far more important than the holiday’s season. She was obviously having a hard time putting things together as she heaved a sigh. If she could just cry, she already did but she always thought she was never in the place to shed a tear. What hurts her most is that she didn’t even do anything wrong, it’s that she did everything right but she couldn’t control all the things that were happening. She already saw this coming, but she couldn’t really do anything about it.

Before her thoughts could go even deeper, someone finally knocked on her door. It was someone whom she wanted to see, at least the person she knew did not hate her ever. She turned around and looked at him, “I thought right, you’re here.” He said as he stepped inside Seohyun’s office and the look in his eyes didn’t show a hint of happiness either, which saddens her even more.

“Why were you looking for me?” She asked him. “You don’t have to feel sorry for me, Sehun.” She added. Sehun wore black suit with white long sleeves and a patterned neck tie. Working in a corporate world made Seohyun used to seeing people in proper attire and people speaking formal language. The business world was something she wished she didn’t know.

“Suho-hyung sent me to hand this to you,” he reached out his hand and gave Seohyun a document. She didn’t want to open it because she already knew what it was about. “The dismissal will be effective on the next few days,” Sehun said without looking at Seohyun. Seeing her in this state surely breaks his heart, and what shatters him more is that he couldn’t do anything about it. Actually, no one can ever do anything about the situation. It was only Suho. Only he can do something because he was the one who made all these things happen.

Seohyun forced a smile, “Don’t worry, I’ll start packing my things tomorrow.” She kept the document inside her bag and looked at Sehun, “I’ll make sure I won’t be around before Christmas. I think that’s what Suho wants.”

Sehun nodded slightly, telling Seohyun he got what she was saying. He was about to step back and leave the room when he said, “I hope you know you can talk to me. I know everything’s already too much for you.”

Seohyun just smiled a little, appreciating all the things Sehun had done to save her from being laid off. “I know that, Sehun. I just really don’t want to talk about it.”

Sehun wanted to say more things to comfort Seohyun, but he just couldn’t bring himself to do so. He just looked at her one last time before leaving her alone. As soon as Sehun left, Seohyun felt tears streaming down her face. She tried to ignore the burden that she was feeling, but she just couldn’t. She covered to avoid Sehun, or anyone, hearing her sobs from outside. She leaned on her table and faced the glass windows once again, tears completely blurred her vision and the lights from the city only became bokeh that didn’t really help the situation.

Seo Joohyun—it was the name that Kim Joonmyun didn’t want to hear the most. He didn’t hate her, but his actions toward her showed he really did and always had. Seohyun was the daughter of a trusted house helper of Suho’s father. Mr. Kim was the CEO of Kim Enterprise and Suho was just the president before, but when his father died, he already stepped up to become the CEO and Sehun, his brother, became the president. Mr. Kim was very fond of Mr. Seo when he was still alive—both of them died in a car accident a few years ago. No one was ever ready for the death of such good men. Seohyun was no one to the business world until Kim Enterprise almost fell into a crisis under Suho, and they didn’t have the choice but to hire Seohyun since she was really intelligent and smart. The employees liked and favoured her, however, she was taking too much spotlight already and Suho didn’t seem to like it. He made it clear from the start that he didn’t need her, but the company did.

Suho was a conceited heir of Kim Enterprise. And when he did inherit the company, he remained self-centered and arrogant. He wanted the limelight on himself alone, but he only trusted one person—Sehun, his brother. The entry of Seohyun in the company gave Suho goosebumps—it scared him that he’ll completely lose the company to her.

Little did he know that everything Seohyun had done for the company was for his father. She remembered Mr. Kim telling her in a random sunny day when she helped her father in the house chores inside the Kim mansion, “I want you to help the company in every possible way you can; you are a great person, Seohyun-ah. Please do this as a favour to me. We don’t know when I will die, but I will stop working soon and I know my sons cannot handle the company properly. You’re a smart person, and I’m entrusting you the fate of the company in the future. For all the things I have done to your family, you can give it all back by working in Kim Enterprise. Not for anyone else, but for me.” The old man said as he sipped his coffee. It was true that Mr. Kim provided the Seo family everything they needed in order to live. They did not live in luxury, but they lived at ease. Mr. Kim provided them a small house, full college tuition fee and just enough salary for Mr. Seo in order to buy food for his family. She owed Mr. Kim a lot. And now that he’s gone, she could only give back through his sons—Suho and Sehun.

She wanted to reject the idea at first—holding on to the fact that Mr. Kim won’t die any soon and she won’t have to work in the company. Whenever she helped his father in the house chores such as gardening, she already met Suho and Sehun. They were good-looking and nice lads but the way they treated her contradicts their appearances. At first, Sehun was as arrogant as Suho, but he got a little soft heart compared to his brother. He talked to her casually in a formal language, he paid respect to her. Suho, on the other hand, treated her like she was a maid even if she wasn’t. She only went to the Kim’s mansion in order to help out but she wasn’t exactly a maid. She already got a bad impression on Suho in the first place that’s why Suho never really liked her in the company.

Suho has only one weakness—he was sick. It wasn’t that serious but sometimes he’d get dizzy or he’d faint just anywhere and anytime. Suho may appear perfect but he wasn’t. Whenever Seohyun sees him pale, somehow, it was a relief seeing this side of Suho to her—he was a human person and he has a heart. He just never really showed it to anyone.

“Don’t leave.” Suho held Seohyun’s wrist tightly as he lied helpless on his bed. “I don’t want to die alone.” He said with his eyes closed, not really aware of the person who helped him when he fainted in their kitchen. It was one of those busy days from the company and when Suho went to the kitchen to drink something, Seohyun just heard a glass shattering. She just watched him sleep that night, she stayed on the side of his bed, and his hand never really let go of hers.

Seohyun wanted to caress Suho’s cheek because he looked troubled in his sleep. She wanted to calm him down if he was having a bad dream. But she didn’t want to wake up him up and let him see her, or else he’d shout in wrath and send her out. So she just remained in her position and held Suho’s hand tightly. No matter how Seohyun was supposed to hate Suho, she couldn’t bring herself to. Suho always had a spot in her heart, no matter how much he rejects her, even breathing the same air as her.

It happened quite a lot of times before. Seohyun never really stopped taking care of Suho whenever he was sick. Ironically, he never really knew it was Seohyun all the time. He always thought it was the ahjumma in the house who cooks for the Kim family. However, it was enough for Seohyun even if no one really knew about it. It was nearly four in the morning when she felt that Suho’s hand finally loosened its hold on hers. She took this as a sign to leave his room before he wakes up. She just made sure he’s already feeling well. She tucked him in well, before looking at him sleeping peacefully and leaving his room. She even made sure closing his door wouldn’t make a sound. As soon as she left his room, there stood Sehun in front of his room.

“So you’re the one who takes care of my brother whenever he’s feeling sick?” Sehun asked, it wasn’t really a question, it was a statement confirming what Seohyun was doing inside Suho’s room. She could only look down, part of her was embarrassed, part of her was scared. They stood in the middle of the garden in silence for a few seconds. Sehun’s arms were crossed on his chest.

“Please don’t tell him.” Seohyun begged, still not looking at Sehun. “Sehun-shi, you know your brother. I promise you that I won’t harm him, he just looks like he’s in need whenever he’s sick. I can’t stand seeing him that way.”

Sehun scoffed a bit, “You’re supposed to hate him, you know? He doesn’t like you that much to start with.” Seohyun did not say anything because clearly, Sehun made a lot of sense.

“I—I can distance myself from now on,” Seohyun finally said, she looked up at Sehun who seemed a lot taller than her. “But will you take care of him whenever he faints? Will somebody wipe his sweat when he sleeps at night? Will there be anyone willing to hold his cold hands when he sleeps?”

Sehun then was left with no words. It seemed that Seohyun knew his brother well without anyone knowing.

“Even if Suho-shi shows a strong façade, behind those walls, he’s a human person with a human heart. He should be taken care of, he should feel loved. I’ll be fine to leave him alone, if you can do those things for him.” Seohyun said in authority, knowing she’s actually a few years older than Sehun.

That moment, Sehun already saw Seohyun in a different way. Without knowing, Sehun already liked her. Those words may have shown how much Seohyun cares for Suho, but that didn’t bother Sehun. He liked her from that moment when she said those words.

Sehun fell silent, he could just stare at Seohyun and adore every feature of her face. He was brought back from his trance when he saw Suho in sweatshirt standing on his terrace from his room. Seohyun wasn’t facing the house so she didn’t really see Suho, but Sehun could read from his facial expression that he didn’t like what his brother was seeing. Sehun averted his gaze back to Seohyun, “I won’t stand in your way, then. But if you need my help, my room’s just across his room.” He smiled at her, first time he ever did. He went back inside their house, leaving Seohyun standing there astounded.

Suho just watched everything, he was far enough not to hear what Seohyun and Sehun were talking about. He was really curious but he never really showed it because that’s Suho for you. Seohyun heaved a sigh as he could tell from her back figure, then she walked towards the gates and went outside—probably going home but he wondered why she had to when it’s past four in the morning already?

While Seohyun silently cried in her office, inside another room that was a lot bigger than hers, on the same floor, Suho faced the windows from his office as well. His hands rested inside his pockets. Wearing a navy blue long sleeved polo with a silver neck tie, his coat resting on the back of his chair, he was staring outside as well, just like Seohyun. He wasn’t sure if the decision he made to fire Seohyun was the best he could have made in his entire life. He always tried to push her away even without enough reasons. He didn’t want her in his life. He wanted to get rid of her. He just always found himself not being strong enough to do so. But this time, he braved all those confusions that held him back before. This time, he gets rid of her.

Permanently.

Sehun entered his office with a disappointed look plastered on his face. He walked towards Suho’s table. “I’ll be leaving tonight for a meeting tomorrow in Jeju, but I’ll be back as soon as I can.” Sehun said, portraying his role as the president of the company. Suho just looked at him knowing Sehun has lot more to say other than those things concerning the company.

“Okay then, have a safe flight.” Suho cleared his throat. He didn’t realize he had been stared for quite a while that his throat already dried.

“You know I understand where you’re coming from,” Sehun said pertaining to Suho being protective of the only thing their father left when he died—their business, putting his hands inside his pockets. He continued, “but we both know she didn’t deserve that approval rate. You know she did everything she could to save this company, and she did. She’s a great person, hyung.” Sehun paused before adding, “and we both know that too.” Sehun pertained to a failing rate Suho gave to Seohyun when he evaluated the employees’ performances in the company. A low rate was synonymous to being dismissed.

“I’m not sure where this conversation is going, but I hope you can just leave me alone right now because I have some papers to finish.” Suho pretended to read some documents on his table but Sehun did not buy his excuse not to hear him out.

“No, hyung. You have to listen to me, as a brother who really cares a lot about you and the people around you who cares for you too.” Sehun did not listen to his brother’s words. “You’re destroying a person’s life here, you’re leaving her scarred for life and she will always remember the pain you’ve caused her. Don’t you see that, hyung? Don’t you?” Sehun’s eyebrows furrowed in frustration but the way he speaks was still calm. “If you fire her, where will she go? Will other companies accept her when in fact, she got fired because of undeniably false ‘low performance’. She’ll have to start anew with nothing. She doesn’t deserve all of this, she doesn’t, hyung.” Sehun shook his head, “And I’m utterly disappointed in you that you couldn’t see or even try to understand Seohyun. You have no idea how much I wanted to help her more than I could, but you also don’t have any idea how much I’m torn choosing between you and Seohyun. You’re my brother and I respect and love you a lot, but this time you’re wrong. But you’re my family so I sided with you all this time. But Seohyun’s really innocent and humble and all-good. And I cannot really take her side just because you don’t.”

“Stop it, Sehun.” Suho calmly shushed his brother. “I don’t want to hear any of it anymore. Just so you know, I feel bad too but if it’s the company we’re talking about, you know I’d do everything to keep it.”

“No one’s taking it away from you!” Sehun suddenly raised the tone of his voice, but still in a calm manner. “Can’t you see that one too? It’s all yours, hyung. Kim Enterprise is only yours. For once, hyung, let your guards down and think of the things that can actually touch your heart. Stop thinking, hyung. Start following your heart, for once. Even just for once.”

“My heart doesn’t tell me anything, Sehun.” Suho knew it was a lie. He felt something before towards Seohyun but he only tried to ignore it. He remembered his mother left them when they were still young, and there was no one to take care of him whenever he feels sick. He remembered how his father wept upon their mother leaving the doors of their house yet she did not even look back. He could still perfectly remember how his father got wasted for a few months before getting back on his feet and showing a strong image to his sons. He remembered the pain of losing the only woman he loved when he was a child. He thought he saw the image of a mother in Seohyun, she was caring and gentle, but Suho was just afraid to admit it to himself that he feels something for her because he knew all girls would just leave their men alone in the end. Like their mother did.

Sehun closed his eyes for a second and looked at Suho again, “Don’t you know all this time Seohyun took care of you whenever you fainted? Don’t you know she would cancel meals with me every time you’d ask her to attend to all your non-sense emergency meetings? Don’t you know she’d still smile whenever she tells me how badly you shouted at her in the middle of executive meetings? Don’t you know it, hyung? No matter what you did to her, she still smiles because of you. She doesn’t care about the company, she won’t take it from you. Suho-hyung, she cares about you, and you only kept on missing that point because you thought she did everything for the company because she has an interest on it—you’re wrong hyung. She cares about the company and makes sure it will stand strongly because you care about it, and she cares about the things you care about.”

“W-what?” Suho didn’t know the fact that Seohyun cared a lot about him.

“Now don’t tell me your heart didn’t feel something when I told you those things.” Sehun said, anger fuming all over him. He breathed in deeply to relax, “I have to leave now. I have a flight to catch.” Sehun said emptily, leaving the spacious office.

Suho held onto the edges of his table. He remembered the times when he felt himself holding a soft hand in the middle of the night whenever nightmares with his mother appear in his dreams. He remembered feeling a hand rubbing his arms whenever he sleeps at night after fainting. All this time he thought it was the old maid who acted like a mother to him and Sehun, but it was Seohyun. In fact, he didn’t know Sehun liked Seohyun this much—asking her out for meals but she’d gladly cancel because of his selfish desire to uplift the state of the company. He didn’t have any idea how much it hurt Seohyun whenever he purposely mortify her in front of the executives and shareholders of the company, but she’d still smile at the end of the day because of him. That moment, Suho wasn’t sure if his heart was starting to feel again because it felt so wrong to feel something towards Seohyun.

Suho saw Seohyun leaving in her car. She looked really down, it must have been because of the letter of layoff she received from Sehun a while ago. “Follow that car, please.” He told his driver as sat on the backseat. His mind wandered as his car followed Seohyun’s. She didn’t even drove home, instead, he found himself watching her walk barefoot on the beach. She stood there, carrying her high-heeled shoes with her hand. She stood there, her back figure facing Suho, with the strong winds blowing against her. Suho finally got off his car, telling his driver to leave the two of them alone.

Seohyun stared blankly at the waves she couldn’t even clearly see because it was already too dark to be there in the beach. She just wanted to feel the fresh air because the office, the company—everything about that place suffocated her for months. And she didn’t even know it until now. She felt like crying again, but her eyes were already tired because of too much tears she cried in her office. She just wanted to think right now in a place where she could be free from all the people she sees every day in the company.

Or so she thought.

The wind blew harder and she was really freezing despite the thick black trench coat she was wearing. That’s when she felt a pair of arms wrapped around her from behind. It gave her warmth and she wanted to turn around so badly to see who it was, but the scent already gave her a hint whose pair of arms they were. “Let’s pretend, even just for tonight, that we don’t hate each other.” Suho said, although it was only applicable to him because all this time, Seohyun loved him.

Because Suho was behind wrapping his arms around her petite body, he couldn’t see that Seohyun was already crying. She just couldn’t understand Suho, and whatever it was that made him follow her, it wouldn’t help her at all to figure out the right thing to do—that is to forget Suho and accept all the things he had done to destroy her. She tried to compose herself and control her breathing so Suho wouldn’t know the massive tears she was already crying.

Suho smelled the familiar scent of Seohyun’s hair. Suddenly, he remembered all the times he had spent with Seohyun and they were really countless. Those were the times that really made Suho skipped a heart beat but he felt horrible right now that he ignored how he felt before. Sehun was right—sometimes it’s right to just let your heart tell you something instead of your mind.

Seohyun was trying to reach a box of milk on top of the shelf in the kitchen of the Kim when an arm reached out for it. That was the first time Suho smelled that scent of Seohyun’s hair. He handed it to her without saying anything, even rolling his eyes on her. He was just that arrogant. Seohyun only looked down, opened the milk and helped the maid in cooking.

There was also a time when Suho was really busy working inside his room that he didn’t bother eating dinner. Seohyun was about to leave the house with her father when she remembered it. She told her father she will just follow him home a little later, she had to do errands. She quickly arranged a meal for Suho on a tray and went upstairs. She knocked twice on his door and opened it. Suho looked pissed when he saw her, disturbing him from reviewing some projects for the company. She quietly put down the tray on his table, to which he only told her, “Don’t ever go inside my room next time. Don’t even knock, don’t even go upstairs.” He said. That stung a bit, but Seohyun was expecting those words already. She just had to make sure Suho won’t miss a meal because that’s not good for him. Days passed and Seohyun really did not even dare stepping on the stairs until she heard something broke upstairs. She heard Suho groaned in pain and she was guessing he broke something made of glass and hurt himself in the process. She quickly took the first aid from the cabinet, and rushed towards the stairs. But she could only stare at the end of the long staircase because she couldn’t bring herself to go up as Suho told her before. She suddenly saw Suho with his hands bleeding, and he was just standing at the top of the stairs looking at her. She just looked down at the box she was holding, the first aid kit. Suho felt guilty that time, he slowly went downstairs and stopped in front of her. For a moment there, her heart skipped a bit realizing how close he was to her. She stepped back a little, and handed Suho the box. Instead of taking it, Suho took her other hand—not minding if the wounds did hurt. He just held her hand and dragged her upstairs in his room where Seohyun ended up tending his cuts.

Suho remembered the time when he had a sudden presentation with the Huang Group of Companies—one of the biggest association of business companies composed of share and stockholders—when he left his report in the company. He was with Seohyun that time and couldn’t manage without his own copy knowing he noted some things on his own paper. Without any notice, he just suddenly couldn’t find Seohyun anywhere when he received a text message from her, “I went back to the office to get your report. I’ll be back in time.” He was already in panic because the meeting was already about to start and Seohyun wasn’t even around yet. He went downstairs in front of the venue and paced back and forth when it suddenly rained. He lost hope that Seohyun could make it back in time. Not to mention that the traffic in front of the venue wasn’t moving at all. He just had to present without his own report, just present what’s on the visual presentation. He knew he won’t pull it through until he heard footsteps behind him. He turned around and saw Seohyun soaking wet, clutching an envelope to her chest. She smiled awkwardly, “It was raining and the traffic wasn’t moving, sorry I had to run and if I’m a little bit late.” She was freezing, he could see that. “But I got you this.” She handed him an envelope, “It’s plastic, don’t worry. The papers inside didn’t get wet.” Then she sneezed. “Oh, you have to go inside now, hurry. I’ll just dry myself.” Seohyun said, smiling again at him when Suho could just stare at her. He even forgot to thank her. Seohyun did not follow Suho inside the hall anymore. She went to the bathroom and fixed herself but she already saw the fever coming any minute now. She kept on sneezing when she heard the door of the bathroom opened. To her surprise, it was Suho, and her greeting was another sneeze. “What are you doing? Isn’t it your turn to present—?” Suho removed his coat and put it over Seohyun’s shoulder, “Sehun can do it.” Turns out Sehun came late as well to the meeting and Suho just asked a favour for him to present his report. He added, “Plus your stupidity drives me insane. You didn’t have to run under the rain just for that report—“ “It was important for you.” Seohyun cut him off. Suho fell silent for a few seconds when Seohyun sneezed again. “Let’s get you home.” He felt guilty that Seohyun got sick because of him. They were only inside Suho’s car when Seohyun already drifted to sleep. She was already burning, her head kept on falling sideways until it finally leaned on Suho’s shoulder. He couldn’t move at all as he felt his heart skip a beat. Suho brought her inside his room and took care of her for the rest of the day. But he got a call from the office so he had to leave, asking Sehun to come over the house and watch over Seohyun—that’s why Seohyun woke up to Sehun’s face watching over her.

Suho remembered more and more, even the times when he did embarrass her in front of his staffs. He remembered when Seohyun wowed the executives with her project proposals and Suho ended up rejecting it. There was also a time when his car broke and Seohyun offered him a ride but he rejected her offer. He remembered all those times when he kept on breaking Seohyun’s heart. She didn’t deserve those treatments from him. But he still did those things to her. And then he remembered the only time he opened his eyes from lying on his bed while he was sick. He remembered he saw a blurry figure of a woman who stayed watching over her, but he was so sick that time that he ended up closing his eyes once more. He didn’t know it was Seohyun that time.

Meanwhile, Seohyun remembered the same things Suho remembered. If there’s a person Seohyun deserves to be with, Suho thought it can only be Sehun but the thought of it hurt him.

They stayed still with Suho hugging Seohyun from behind to keep her warm. But it didn’t take that long before Seohyun removed his arms around her and faced him. Seohyun already wiped her tears away but they seemed really unstoppable this time. She reached out her hand and touched Suho’s cheek. She tried to memorize every feature of his face because she’s not sure if she’d ever see them again. “You don’t have to feel sorry too. I’ll be fine.” Seohyun assured Suho but it wasn’t convincing. She bit her lip before continuing because her tears blurred her vision. “In fact I’m the one who’s sorry—I didn’t mean to make you feel this way. I hate myself for making you feel like you’re a bad person when you’re really not. I hate myself for confusing you at times. I hate myself for—for scaring you with the thought of losing the company. I hate myself for everything I’ve done to you, so you don’t have to worry about me.”

“Seohyun…” Suho muttered.

“You don’t have to feel sorry because I hate myself and I’d hate myself more for that.” Seohyun looked down and removed her hand from Suho’s cheek. She wiped away her tears and looked at him again. “But… do you really want me to leave?”

Suho couldn’t answer. The thing was with the folder that Sehun gave to Seohyun, it contained a one-way plane ticket—Suho wasn’t just firing her, he was also sending her somewhere far away. “I’ve done so many things I wish I didn’t do to you…” He started, but he had to look away first because his tears also threatened to fall from his eyes. “I don’t want you to lose everything once you leave the company. I want you to start… to start anew in a place where you really can. Without me, far away from me, without you remembering all the things I’ve done against you.”

Seohyun nodded a little, “Then I guess this is the last time we’ll be seeing each other?” She even tried to smile but she failed.

“I want you to forget me and forgive me in the process of forgetting me.” Suho said, tears finally escaped from his eyes but he was quick enough to wipe them away.

Seohyun knew it was impossible to do what Suho was asking for but she only found herself nodding, “I will.” There was nothing left to say and Seohyun just wanted a place to cry—a place where she could comfortably do so because there’s nothing else she could do at the moment. She was about to leave Suho right there, but he quickly stopped her and cupped her face. He leaned in, closed his eyes tightly and kissed her passionately on the lips. Seohyun savoured the moment as she found herself closing her eyes as well. She kissed him back like her life depended on it, like it was a romantic goodbye kiss. But the thought of it hurt her. Tears fell from eyes and Suho felt her tears on his hands. When they needed to breathe for more air, Suho pressed his forehead against hers. He breathed in deeply and wiped her tears.

“You’re supposed to forget that one as well.” Suho said, his eyes still closed. He slowly put down his hands to his sides, and Seohyun could just look at him with eyes puffed because of crying. She just bit her lips and nodded like a child while looking down. Without anything else to say, she quickly ran to her car and drove away, leaving Suho… forever.

After a few months, Suho could just pray that Seohyun had a safe flight and was already doing well in whatever country his secretary arranged for her. When he passed by Seohyun’s old office, he couldn’t help but stop and take a look inside. There he saw Sehun holding a picture frame that Suho could remember contained a picture of Seohyun together with his father.

Sehun knew it was Suho as he put the frame in a box. “It really didn’t occur to me until now that we’re not the only ones who lost our father, Seohyun also lost her father.” Sehun said. And it was the same for Suho—it was only now that he realized it. He remembered he was too agonized by the pain that the death of their father brought to him that he was already blinded by it. He did not realize Seohyun’s father also died that time when their father did. Suho walked closer to Sehun and watched him fix and clean Seohyun’s office.

“She did not come back?” Suho said as he saw all Seohyun’s things were still in her office. Sehun just took the initiative to clean the room and leave it for vacancy.

“I don’t know I guess she just needed space and I think I understand her. Besides, I don’t think she’d be needing these papers since she won’t work for our company anymore.” Sehun continued putting Seohyun’s things in the box until it was full. “I’ll just keep this inside my office, in case she comes back, though that seems really impossible because it’s been months already.” Sehun sighed and looked at Suho, “Your secretary told me earlier he did put this month’s reports on your table.” Sehun said as he left Suho inside Seohyun’s old office while carrying the box of her things.

Sehun didn’t know Seohyun, more or less, had flown away towards another country. And she wouldn’t come back just to fetch her things. Suho felt it stung his heart—knowing she won’t come back and knowing he cannot follow her and that his heart was longing to see her. Deep inside him, he terribly missed her. That night in the beach was the last time they saw each other. He looked one last time at Seohyun’s name on the table, before closing the door of the office. He headed back to his own office and scanned the papers he was about to review for the day. When he opened the financial report, he was surprised to see a bill from a hospital—and it was under Seohyun’s card. He really didn’t know why his heart started thumping hard—he looked at the date beside it and it was dated a few months back. He quickly sent his secretary inside his office.

“When did Seohyun start using her health card? And was it that often?” Suho asked his secretary frantically.

“We tried to trace it, Sir. We tried to cut her card too, but we were always redirected to the hospital telling us Seohyun-shi is in the middle of therapy.” His secretary answered.

“Can you give me the address of the hospital?” Suho stood up from his chair and quickly took his coat and left the office as soon as his secretary gave him the address.

“She’s doing a lot better now.” The doctor said as he stood beside Suho. They were watching Seohyun from a glass window, she was interacting with a therapist and she smiled like a child and nodded to whatever the therapist was telling her. Suho just wanted to cry right there at the moment seeing Seohyun not herself—she was suffering from an acute amnesia wherein she forgot how to even read and write. “The impact of the car accident dated a few months back caused her to be this way. Actually, we’re lucky enough that she made it alive.”

Suho’s heart broke. When he asked Seohyun to forget him that night, he didn’t mean it this way. “Can’t she really remember anything or anyone at all?”

The doctor frowned a little, “I’m afraid she really cannot.” He then sighed, together with Suho. “We tried to, and we’ll keep on trying to make her remember.” Then the doctor left Suho to attend to other patient.

When the therapist left Seohyun alone, she just sat there like an innocent child and stared at Suho. Suho flashed her a smile, even if he just wanted to cry and break down in front of her, and beg her to remember everything instead. Seohyun’s eyes brightened up upon seeing Suho but it was only because she thinks he’s a friend like her therapist.

Seohyun then was brought back to her room, and she glanced once again at Suho and even waved at him. Her eyes sparkled and Suho waved back. But his heart was still breaking.

When Seohyun was already inside her own room, Suho cried. He couldn’t stop crying. He couldn’t even pretend anymore that he was okay. He finally let his guards down and admitted to himself that he loved Seohyun. Sehun then came running in the lobby of the hospital and he found his brother crying like he just lost someone as important as their father in his life. Sehun quickly helped Suho to get up and let him sit on a chair. He could only watch his brother cry and pat his back to at least comfort.

“I didn’t mean it to happen—I didn’t…” Suho said, but Sehun only hushed her.

“I knew you sent her away, hyung. But I didn’t want you to feel worse about yourself than you already did so I never really mentioned it.” Sehun said. “Hyung, you just have to think positively—we’re lucky she’s alive, okay? She did not die and that means she lives on.” Sehun added.

“It’s just not right—I can’t believe of all things that can happen… the doctor said she can’t remember anything or anyone at all.” Suho said, calming down a little bit. Thanks to Sehun.

Even if it shocked and hurt Sehun to hear that, he was more composed than Suho. “Don’t cry, hyung. Make her remember you, make her remember us. Make her remember the good memories. It’s a good start—it will be a good start for both of you.”

Suho entered Seohyun’s room, she was reading a book for children. The sight of it almost broke Suho into tears once again but he managed to control himself. He just couldn’t believe someone as smart as Seohyun forgot how to read and write and was just learning them all over again. She put down the book and smiled at him sweetly—as if Suho never really did anything against her before.

Suho smiled back. “Do you know me? Or do you remember me? I’m Suho.” Suho offered his hand for a handshake but Seohyun just took something from the bedside table and gave it to Suho instead of taking his hand. Suho took the paper and saw it was the plane ticket he gave to her when he asked her to leave the country. It was actually a flight to Japan.

“I—I’m sorry. I—I mi—missed… the… flight.” She stuttered on every word. But it was a good sign—a good sign that somehow, she remembered Suho. Suho just smiled, tears blurring his eyes, and embraced Seohyun tightly. She just smiled and loved the thought that someone was hugging her like a real friend of a child would. She finally met a friend, that’s what she thought. Sehun saw this from the door of the room and he couldn’t help but shed a tear. The sight was touching. And he was somehow happy for his brother.

After a few more months, Seohyun was slowly recovering and Suho brought her to the rooftop of the hospital. Seohyun seemed to be amazed by the view, although it wasn’t that high at all. She sat back beside Suho on the bench and hugged his arm. She leaned on his shoulders, and that’s when Suho noticed it was snowing—the first snow of the year.

He was happy to spend the first snow with the person he loved. He’d never stop hoping that Seohyun will fully recover. That’s his Christmas wish and he needed just a miracle in December.