6.       Letting go of a person you have learned to love.

I already told myself that I should let you go but I can’t. Not now, that I have already love you so much. This is the only thing that I can’t pretend to myself. I can’t pretend and lie to myself that I don’t love you.

~Sungmin

KYUHYUN’S POV

It’s our last day of this school year. Still I and Sungmin are not in good terms. I don’t really understand why we ended up like this. Maybe we really had a misunderstanding but I can’t ask him about our problem. He still avoids me and I can’t get him away from his bestfriends because he might get mad at me. I’m afraid to lose him yet I don’t make a move.

Stupid Kyuhyun.

It’s hard to have one-sided love. It hurts so badly yet I have to endure the pain just to see my love happy.

Wow. What a martyr am I or maybe this is what stupidity is or whatever you call it. I just really love him and I am willing to do whatever stupid things because of unconditional love I have for him. Yes, I, Cho Kyuhyun, will love Lee Sungmin until my heart gave up. But sometimes all things have to end.

We were in our classmate’s party, some are dancing, singing, eating or maybe chatting with their circle of friends. All of us are having fun but I can’t take my eyes off of Sungmin the entire time we’re here. Surely, he’s having fun. Just then someone tapped his shoulder that I don’t recognize as our classmate or schoolmate. I quickly went there when Sungmin and that person went to the corner to talk. I asked Shindong if he knows that person and he said it was Sungmin’s ex-lover.

Great. Why is he here?

 I saw the happiness in Sungmin’s eyes when he saw that person and now that they are having a conversation that smile on Sungmin’s face shows that he really is happy to see him. Damn! I can’t take this anymore. It hurts to see him happy and I am not the one that can make him happy.  The one I love is now happy with his ex-lover or, maybe his lover again. Who cares?! I don’t care anymore. I clenched my fist as I looked at them one last time. I got up from my seat and quickly went outside to go home.

I inhale the cold air, it feels like I was suffocating inside. I turned around as I remember what I saw earlier. I punched the wall so hard that my knuckles are bleeding now. My heart hurts more than my hands. I sometimes wished that my heart could become numb so that I can’t feel the pain anymore. I wiped the tears that fell down on my cheeks and started to walk going home. I lose even before the battle began. I decide to stop this feeling I have for Sungmin because it is useless. I gave up but my heart wants to continue to fight but I can’t bare the pain anymore. It’s killing me now. I know that Sungmin’s happiness is more important that’s why I gave up. I should let him go and let him be with the one he truly loves. I love Sungmin that’s why this is better for him and for me too. It would be hard but for now, I want Sungmin’s happiness to come true.

~TBC

2 more chapters to go.:))