Title: [4/5] When I first saw your title, I was kind of confused by your choice of words. The I actually read the story and saw that you were trying to incorporate themes into your chapters. At first I didn't figure it out, but I remember at the end of one of you chapters, you wrote " Blinded By Pride". It all fell into place and my first thoughts were that it was a very original idea, not to mention a genius idea. I've never seen anything like it before.

Description/ Foreword: [9.5/10] I liked your description ALOT. It really pulled me in because of your amazing vocabulary. Many of the books I have read have descriptions that are enough to pull a reader in but your description leaves them wanting more. I deducted half a mark because I felt like something was missing. I can't really place my finger on it. Other than that, your description was awesome.

Originality: [10/10] I loved the fact that the groups are not actually in groups. Usually, I don't like books like that, but your story changed my opinion. The way you develop your characters is so life-like, I believed that the way they are in your story is the way they could be in reality. I also like how you try to incorporate all the characters in and give them different personalities to keep the story moving forward. The background stories also caught my attention. Usually, I don't see background stories like that, so I like what you did there.

Plot/ Writing: [27/30] Your writing is absolutely AMAZING. The way you write it is so mature,  and the vocabulary you use is developed. That helps keep the story going. Your plot is AMAZING as well. I have never read a story where the groups are not actually in groups. At first, I didn't think I'd enjoy the story because of this, but the way that you develop the characters and have an individual plan for everyone really changed my opinion. You have a gift. Plain and simple. I am honestly impressed. As you can see, I took away three marks. I only did that because sometimes your choice of vocabulary confused me and I had to go back and re-read the chapter to get what was going on. It's not that big of an issue for me, but for other people who don't read the dictionary for fun, it maybe a problem. I'm not saying to change whole paragraphs.  A good thing to do is to get someone else to go over your story and point out the confusing parts. All you have to do is tone down the vocabulary a little bit so that a wide range of people can read it without having to get up and grab a dictionary every time they come across a hard word.

Characters: [10/10] Your characters are developing as the story goes. I am learning new things about each of them in every chapter. Normally, to pull this off while keeping the story flowing smoothly is a hard thing to. All I have to say is, kudos to you. You managed to pull off what a lot of people can't do. I have no complaints on this part of your story.

Grammar/ Vocabulary: [23/25] Overall your grammar and vocabulary is good. As I mentioned before, your vocabulary is actually amazing. I haven't read many stories with an advanced vocabulary like yours. Your grammar is awesome as well. I only spotted a couple mistakes here and there. Two that I can mention off the top of my head are 1. Away is one word. You did it like this " A. Way." 2. It's not disinterested, it's uninterested. Other than that, mistakes were scarce and the mistakes I did find were minor ones.

Overall Excitement: [4/5] I took away a mark because you kind of took a long time to get to the point of excitement. Don't go and change you story. Maybe add more excitement in the chapters to come to make up for it.

Extra (Poster/Background/Chapter Titles/Chapters Length): [4.5/5] I really liked how your poster and the background matched. Author don't really pay attention to those kind of things. You chapter titles were also very eye-catching because they hinted the mystery of that chapter. As for chapter length, I think you should make them longer, but it's only because I CAN'T STOP READING!!!!

Total Points: [92/100] 

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Reviewed By: Shahani

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