So you guys remember when that girl broke into the dorm and all, right? Well, I thought that was a fluke. I didn't know that our address was common knowledge 'cause fans in HK just aren't that stalkerish. They let the papparizzi do that ish and stay nice and warm in their homes. In Korea things are completly different. I found this out because of eggs. 

So one morning we all get up. Its a rare Sunday when there are no schedules and no cram school, so we decide to have real breakfast instead of just toast. Jinyoung, the self appointed cook, opened the fridge to find that there were no eggs, which cause you kind of need eggs for everything. He refused to go buy them (because of the scary fans) and so did everyone else. So I went, because at that time I didn't have crazy fans following me everywhere. I didn't feel like changing, so I went out in pajama pants covered in ducks, an over sized hoodie that said "WANG" on the back, and a pair of sunglasses. At the time, I didn't know that people knew where Got7 lived, so I didn't think about the fact that having my family name emblazoned on my back would bite me in the . I made it all the way to the refridgerated section of the corner mart before I realized that someone was following me. I just though it was me being paranoid. I was not.

I turned around and there was this teenaged girl,staring at me with her phone held up in the air. We both looked at each other for a minute. She was clearly shocked, as was I. Thankfully in these few months I had been trained to have idol-like reflexes, so I smiled and surruptiously ducked behind a toilet paper display. I peeked out every few seconds to see if the girl was still there, and eventually asked the owner if I could use the back door to escape. 

I ran all the way back to the dorm, clutching the three cartons of eggs to my chest. As soon as I got in the door I shoved the eggs at someone (still not sure who) and started yelling/recounting my tale.

"OMIGOD I WAS JUST FOLLOWED!" Probably not the best way to start things.

Jackson shot up like a rocket, "WHAT? Where? Don't worry oppa will kill him for you." And that was wierdest things he has ever said.

"Did you just refer to yourself as oppa?", Jinyoung asked, giving him the side-eye.

"Who cares" Jackson deflected, "What happened?"

"I was followed by a teenaged girl from in front of the building to the refreidgerated section of the corner store. I think she was either filming me or taking pictures."

"Noona, you are dressed like a tiny Jackson", Yugeom said. I glared at him. "If she didn't see your face we can blame it on shoelifts.

"Yugeom", I started, "I'm not sure if your parents told you this, but there are visible differences between girls and boys."

He blinked and stared. And then his eyes drifted south. "Oh. Thats what you meant."

Jackson hit him, of course. Jinyoung, the responsible one of the hour, called the manager. He demanded to be put on speakerphone.

"You guys, just calm down" he said in what I guess was supposed to be a soothing tone, "We can just say that without shoe lifts, Jackson looks shorter."

"Hyung" Jackson said, "even without shoelifts I'm taller than 150cm."

"Hey", I butted in, "I'm 152".

"Also", Jackson continued, "I don't have shoulder length brown hair, I don't have the same face as Jess, plus I'm a guy so I don't have s."

"Oh", the manager said dejectedly, "I forgot about that."

"You forgot I was a girl?", I screeched.

"...Yes." Cue glare towards the phone.

"Hyung", JB added, "Why don't we just say that Jackson is watching her because their parents are on vacation?."

"The fans will never believe that."

"What won't they believe", I asked.

"Well, maybe they'd believe it, but they won't be happy about it."

"They won't be happy about one of their precious Got7 oppas going out of his way to make sure that his younger sister is somewhere safe?"

"... Remind me to get you an internship with PR."

"Not unless it pays."

"Alright, we'll offer breaking the story to the highest bidder, do a few interviews, maybe a couple of appearances and it'll be all good."

O.o.o.O.O.o.o.O.O.o.o.O.O.o.

For once the manager was right.

The fans as a whole weren't mad or anything. It's just that to be funny I talked about the summer Jackson decided he was going to be a nudist and we kept getting complaints from the neighbors. Apparently sharing these little tidbits has gotten me a fanclub of my own. I didn't know this until the day I helped Jackson sort out his fan mail.

I had just read a letter from a girl that wanted to have Jackson's babies and was considering writting back to tell her that Jackson had a big head as a baby and my mom still hasn't forgiven him for breaking her pelvis when he dropped a letter on my head and said that it was for me.

Now I'm sitting here thinking my parents have finally deigned my worthy of communication and it turns out to be a fan letter. The letter explained how she loved the stories I told about Jackson and that she was so glad that I couldn't threaten her relationship with JB. I wasn't sure whether to feel insulted or not. If it was an insult she did a good job there; I'm impressed that someone other than me can do backhanded compliments so well.

That letter did not make me think I had fans or anything. One person sent me a letter; that does not qualify as having a fanbase. I did more interviews, and aquired embarrassing stories about everyone. That's when the flood came. Apparently fans really like it when you embarrass the hell out of their favorite idols, who knew? But then again, who wouldn't love hearing about the time BamBam got a pair of underwear stuck on his head?

A/N: I'm Baaaack! Sorry that I haven't updated in a long time; I got writer's block. It so bad. I felt like everything I did write was complete crap. Funny thing is, when I reread this chapter I suddenly liked it. So I posted it. So yeah, Jessica is now a semi public figure. Mostly because kpop fans have this habit of being able to call bull. Its so accurate its like a science. I'm glad to be back and I'm going to try to prewrite as many chapters as I can before writer's block hits again. Like always if there are any scenarios or jokes you want to see feel free to put them in the comments; you will be credited if I decide to use your idea or am inspired by something you say.